Up date on Nebraska safe haven law

Here's the deal. No good parent would ever permanitly give up there child after living with them for a number of years

I don't know...Only playing devils advocate here...But don't you just wish, and remember people saying this...That the lady "whatsherface" who drowned her 5 kids would have just turned them over? I'm not saying it is the best idea. And I could NEVER ditch my love bugs! But, man, if she would have handed her kids to me on the street saying she was overwhelmed, I'd of taken them and gotten her some help. I wish she would, and all the other millions of crazy Mom's could have dealt with their kids better. Oh, and what about the lady in Cali...Who drove her kids off a bridge only saving herself? Yikes. Nuts!

Oh and by the way I have a 16 old daughter at times I'd love to drive to Nebraska and drop off - except it's too far :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Oh...My son...MAN! He's such a goof right now...I hear ya sister! LOL

From my point of view it is so hard on those kids. I was put up for adoption when I was 6 yrs old and I was adopted when I was 8. I was in and out of foster homes since I was a little baby. My birth mother kept my brother and gave my sister and me up. Her excuse was she didnt think anyone would take him because he was mixed. I have had to deal with abandonment issues my whole life. I think just these past 2 years have I been feeling a little better about myself. I also think that is why I am finally able to take control of my weight now. At least try. All these kids will feel like they are not worthy of anyones love. It will be years upon years for them to get over this. I cant believe this.

Connie

I hope me sending my daughter does not feel like I abandoned her, Seeing you say that now I am scared.
I do however talk to her daily and tell her I love her all the time and tell her how proud i am of her change and I send her things when she gets good grades and i just don't want her to feel like i don't love her and we talk about why she is there at her fathers and she sayss she knows but she will be coming home next summer for 2 weeks so we can be together.

I think that is a different situation. My mother just gave us up and we didnt know why or anything. You tend to think that things are your fault. You at least talk to your daughter. After I was given up we didnt have any contact with our mother, all we knew was that she didnt want us anymore. I think you and your daughter now have a good relationship. I actually had a great relationship with my adoptive mom as I grew older. I would call her almost everyday. I miss her... she died of breast cancer in dec of 06.

Connie

I shouldn't have read this thread. You guys have me crying. :sad:

I guess since I cannot fathom giving away my child, no matter the circumstance, I try to believe that all these parents are good parents. I know that is a naive thought, stupid and utterly ridiculous, but it's the only way I can begin to process how parents could dump their kids off and leave. They must all be good parents doing what was best for their kid's sake, not just worthless parents who were sick of their kids. People-- the young and the old -- have become disposable these days. Ditch the kids anyway you can, and park your aging parents in a nursing home. It's deplorable.:brokenheart:

Monica, sending your daughter to live with her father does NOT qualify as abandoning her. I can only imagine how hard that was for you. You did what was best for her... It reminds me of parents who have to put their kids in military schools, in hopes they can straighten out the kid. You are still responsible for her, have a relationship with her, talk to her often, support her, love her. You didn't throw her away, you did what was right by her, for her safety. That took love. That is respectable.

Thank you so much for all the words of encouragement it was very hard for me and I still cry I cried today when I sent her a pakage with a cutie little purse in it for her great grades and I sent her some material and a patteren for her to make a dress for her home economics class and one of her favorite dresses.

This is for all of ya'll ***************HUGS**********************

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}Back to you Monica

Thanks anna

Hokay, I'm adding one more case...Did you read on the AOL news feed yesterday about the girl who was 14 years old and weighed 48 pounds? CPS checked on her a few years ago and figured it wasn't bad enough to do much yet. As of recent, she was taken away from her parents after being locked up. Don't you just wish the parents would have turned her over? I'm all for getting help and asking if needed. I wish more parents could do so if needed.

how sad

UPDATE ON THE UPDATE-- this just reported--


MSNBC.com

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Neb. agrees on 'safe haven' age limit
Lawmakers agree to cap child's drop-off age to no more than 3 days old
The Associated Press
updated 7:19 p.m. ET, Mon., Oct. 20, 2008
LINCOLN, Neb. - Stung by the abandonments of children as old as 17 under Nebraska's new "safe haven" law, the governor and lawmakers agreed Monday to narrow the legislation's broad wording to protect only the parents of newborns from prosecution.

Forty of the Legislature's 49 senators support amending the law so it applies only to infants up to 3 days old, legislative Speaker Mike Flood said at a news conference. The age cap would change the Nebraska law from the most lenient to one of the nation's most restrictive.

At least 18 children, the youngest 22 months and many of them teens, have been abandoned since the law took effect in July. Nebraska's law doesn't define the word "child," so it has been interpreted to let anyone leave child up to age 18 at a state-licensed hospital without fear of prosecution for the abandonment.

Most states let parents and guardians drop off children who are up to a month old at hospitals or other safe institutions. Sixteen states have a 3-day-old age cap such as the one agreed to in Nebraska.

Every state has a safe-haven law, which is meant to save the lives of unwanted infants.

Unintended consequences
The Nebraska law has had "serious, unintended consequences," Gov. Dave Heineman said. "This law needs to be changed to focus on infants."

The governor reiterated that he would prefer not to call a special session before the Legislature's regular session in January. But he indicated he could change his mind.

"If circumstances dictate, particularly if we have several more from out of state, I won't hesitate to make that call" for a special session, Heineman said.

Should Heineman not call a special session, Flood said, lawmakers would quickly change the law, probably within the first couple weeks of the session.

The rash of drop-offs included a teenage girl from Iowa and a Michigan boy whose mother drove to Omaha to leave him at a Omaha hospital. The events put Nebraska in the type of national spotlight that makes politicians wince.

"Saturday Night Live" poked fun at the law last weekend. During the "Weekend Update" segment, Seth Meyers said, "A second teenager has been left at an area hospital under Nebraska's new safe-haven law, which allows parents to abandon their children without fear of prosecution. Or what is known in Manhattan as boarding school."

Psychological scars
A national expert on safe-haven laws commended Nebraska officials for moving to impose an age limit, but he said action should be taken now to prevent older children from receiving the scars of abandonment.

"It affects children," said Tim Jaccard, president of the National Safe Haven Alliance. "When children are older they have the ability to understand what's going on and they're thinking, 'Mommy and Daddy don't want me anymore, so they're throwing me in a hospital.' That's a psychological blow."

Jaccard said that over the last decade about 1,560 kids have been dropped off under safe-haven laws.

Before the law is changed, Nebraska officials are trying to prevent more drop-offs.

Heineman has authorized Health and Human Services to spend up to $100,000 promoting a help line for parents and guardians operated by United Way. If it is flooded with calls, up to $200,000 in state money could be used to add phone lines.


The state is also sending letters to all adoptive parents and guardians of children who are former state wards. The letter provides phone numbers and Web sites of agencies that can help them if they are having problems with their children.

The letter also suggests parents contact Boys Town, an Omaha home for troubled youths that for decades has taken in children who are having problems.

The letter does not mention that Nebraska has a safe-haven law.


Copyright 2008 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
URL: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27282433/

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