Emotional Eating

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Please help......Hospice has been brought in for my mother. I am an emotional wreck, no time for regular excercising and am so afraid that I am going to overeat. Why this is bothering me so much when my mother is dying is beyond me.....I have so much more to think about. :sad:

Replies

  • PaulaArina
    PaulaArina Posts: 2 Member
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    First of all let me start out by saying I am so very sorry. Secondly, try to replace eating with some other activity. I have found that by putting on some music and just taking a little walk then it helps me to stop eating. However, I can understand you not wanting to leave. Try drinking a ton of water. I have found that if I chug the water then I do not want to eat.
  • mnkarp
    mnkarp Posts: 38 Member
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    You can control what you put in your mouth and not what happens with your mother - maybe that is why it is bothering you? Stop focusing on the food and just be there for her, no matter what that means to you. Please do not beat yourself up over what you eat at this time because it is just not important.
  • ShellyMacchi
    ShellyMacchi Posts: 975 Member
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    sometimes it helps to have one thing you feel you can control (food?) when other things beyond our control threaten to overwhelm us.
    *wishing i could give you a hug as have been there too with my mum*

    don't worry about the exercise (athough long walks can sure help clear the mind and give you a chance to process things internally sometimes).. just do what you need to do to keep yourself strong for her hun.. *S* that's all anyone can do.
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
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    I am very sorry to hear about your mother. It's ok to relax on your eating habits during this time. Maybe not focus on losing weight right now but maintaining it so that when you do get to a point when you are ready to get back on the horse you can just start where you left off. I am sorry This is the best advice I have. Take care of yourself
  • mikeyrp
    mikeyrp Posts: 1,616 Member
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    I'm really sorry to hear about your mum.

    Forget worrying about weight loss for a minute and focus making sure you actually get the nutation your body needs to keep you going - Sit down and plan what you are going to eat for the next few days - when you can cook and when you will need to get something pre-made. Write it all down, follow it as best you can but don't beat yourself up over i if you cant. If you're eaten properly you will be less inclined to comfort eat as a) you wont be hungry and b) you can look forward to the next meal.

    Personally I find taking control of the small thing like organizing and cooking therapeutic. It gives me something practical to focus on.

    Hope this helps

    Mike x
  • fatfranny
    fatfranny Posts: 36 Member
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    I have been where you are at. My Dad passed away under Hospice care 8 months ago. One thing that helped me while I was going through that point in time was to remind myself that what I put in my mouth was the one thing I could control. I was very successful during that part of the journey. However, I have slowly lost sight of my goals after Dad's passing. Grief clouded my resolve. Not to scare you, but to warn you about the grieving process which will follow. My faith in the Lord got me through. My prayer is that you find comfort there too. He is the only real comfort we have, food is temporary, God is forever.
  • michelle4271
    michelle4271 Posts: 194 Member
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    (((( hugs ))) I hope you can find the strength and confidence to focus on your mom, and your journey will be stronger in the end.
  • twooliver
    twooliver Posts: 450 Member
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    Being afraid that you're going to overeat at a time like this is a good indication of your desire to stay on track. You and I both know the dangers of strong emotions and watching a loved one die evokes the strongest emotions!

    1. Please consider identifying at least three friends on MFP who you can call during this time when you need to vent, cry, or talk through what you are experiencing. This will help you stay in the present without hiding behind the food.

    2. Your feelings are not open for judgment - honor them the best you can

    3. This is holy time with your mother...time you cannot get back...choose how you want to spend these final days with her

    4. Be gentle with yourself - there is a before, during, and after (your mother's transition) and each stage will bring different feelings

    5. Know and recognize the love that is around you and pass it on...
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    My heart goes out to you in this terrible time. :brokenheart:

    During periods of emotional binging, my therapist gave me simple advice, when I told her I simply wasn't at a point I could control it. She said:

    If you are going to binge, do it on healthy food. Carrots, grapes, celery.

    I did it. I binged on grapes. I must have eaten 2 lbs of a grapes a day for a few days. It fulfilled the emotional "need" that I couldn't stop but it didn't cause me to gain weight.

    I know the goal is to overcome emotional eating, but while you have so much going on..... take care of yourself emotionally. This is one of those situations, in my opinion - from one emotional eater to another - where you don't need to beat yourself up or expect too much of yourself.

    Grapes are super sweet. They have a small satisfying crunch. Carrots are semi sweet and have a great crunch. Celery? Well it crunches and if you needed to add a little something to stomach it, then go ahead.

    Try, try, try to stuff yourself with healthy foods at least. It will help you keep up your energy.

    Again, my thoughts are with you during this time.
  • dcain2
    dcain2 Posts: 102 Member
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    Thank you so very much for your kindness and your wonderful advice. MFP members are such great people! Thank you again!!