The Invisible Man

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allanaaron
allanaaron Posts: 43 Member
I weighed 367 pounds a few years ago and at six feet tall with a waist in the 60 inch range I could be seen from quite a distance, but when walking down a hallway with an attractive woman walking towards me, I just had to look in her eyes and see I was invisible. Over a period of a year I lost about 120 lbs. and with every lost bowling ball (That's a 16 lb. loss - I lost almost 8 bowling balls) I became more and more visible. Suddenly, with confidence blooming and a good frame that makes me look slim at 240 lbs. I was not only visible but those passing women were turning and smiling at me. After a while I didn't have to look over my shoulder to see who they were smiling at. And soon, sadly, due to any number of reasons I started gaining weight again and I watched the process in reverse. First the smiles stopped and then slowly but surely I became invisible again. I got up to 327 when I found My Fitness Pal site about three weeks ago and am now under 310 and am working on giving away my second bowling ball. Just feeling good about myself, less bloated, but still big, I can sense I am becoming visible again. It's all a magic trick in slow motion - amazing - sad - exciting - real. ... I invite anyone who enjoyed this little slice of my life to become my friend on the site. Because save one friend, so far, I'm still too invisible. ; )

Replies

  • MissTomGettingThin
    MissTomGettingThin Posts: 776 Member
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    Hello
    I can see ya!
  • allanaaron
    allanaaron Posts: 43 Member
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    Thanks Hon, a few people have responded likewise. it's very touching. Us over eaters carry our pain on our waist and thighs and we're all here at this site to give that away and replace it with health and more joy. It can be lonely using my drug (food) a lot less, but somehow staying conscious and owning my food by writing it down feels better than any food can make me feel. But the fact we have a community to support each other on this journey is nothing short of awesome. thank you.
  • hroush
    hroush Posts: 2,073 Member
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    I went from 280 to 210 at 5' 10" six years ago and I still feel weird when a girl smiles at me as they pass. I may have become visible, but I'm still "fat" on the inside.
  • lots_to_lose
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    I completely identify with you. I feel like once I crossed the line from obese to morbidly obese I sort of became genderless. I feel like the average man doesn't look at me as a woman. I'm happily married, so I'm not looking for a date or anything, but it would be nice to feel attractive to the opposite sex anyhow. I think I've got about 30 pounds to go till I'm "obese", instead of "morbidly obese" again.
  • ohioattorney1
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    I am glad to be your friend! And I can see you and I am proud of your efforts. One of the most important things I have learned through this process is that we are in control of our visibility just like we are in control of what and how much we eat. I always thought that if I was bigger people would see me more, but, like you, I learned that just the opposite was true. It also took me a long time to figure out that I didn't need to use food as a drug anymore and that just because others in my life, whom I thought should love me didn't, didn't mean I couldn't love myself enough to take care of myself. In short what I learned was that it only is important that I can see myself, and without the filters that other people impose on us. When we can see ourselves then we don't need food to be our friend anymore because we can be our own best friend.
  • allanaaron
    allanaaron Posts: 43 Member
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    I asked a trainer what does it take to get 6 pack abs (I currently have 24 pack abs) and she said that it has little to do with the condition of your stomach and more to do with being underweight. Get your body fat unhealthily low and you'll have 6 packs.
  • allanaaron
    allanaaron Posts: 43 Member
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    Thanks all for your comments and all the friend requests.
  • allanaaron
    allanaaron Posts: 43 Member
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    I am glad to be your friend! And I can see you and I am proud of your efforts. One of the most important things I have learned through this process is that we are in control of our visibility just like we are in control of what and how much we eat. I always thought that if I was bigger people would see me more, but, like you, I learned that just the opposite was true. It also took me a long time to figure out that I didn't need to use food as a drug anymore and that just because others in my life, whom I thought should love me didn't, didn't mean I couldn't love myself enough to take care of myself. In short what I learned was that it only is important that I can see myself, and without the filters that other people impose on us. When we can see ourselves then we don't need food to be our friend anymore because we can be our own best friend.
  • allanaaron
    allanaaron Posts: 43 Member
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    I agree with everything you said. RIGHT ON.
  • allanaaron
    allanaaron Posts: 43 Member
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    The charts that claim obese and morbidly obese are criminal. The people who put them together should be shot... with pudding bullets. In fact maybe tomorrow or so I'll blog on this point, but you are not morbidly obese, you are using other people's definitions. What you are is someone who is getting healthier. Yes you have a lot to lose and less to give away everyday, but your total that you are losing is a sign of the hero in you. As you slim down people will look at you like a hero, someone who took an heroic action and changed themselves and therefore everyone around them. Counting calories is not dieting, it is living healthier. Add balanced food groups and you are on your way to becoming WONDER WOMAN! Throw those damn labels in the basket, stop EVER referring to them. Set realistic goals based on who you are not what charts say you should be. If your goal is too ambitious then you are setting yourself up for failure as you try to satisfy others.

    Real glory springs from the silent conquest of ourselves.
    ~ Joseph P. Thompson

    Set Your Goals High Enough To Inspire You And Low Enough To Encourage You.
  • janemartin02
    janemartin02 Posts: 2,653 Member
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    Thanks for sharing.people who aren`t overwt don`t understand the pain,suffering,dedication,will power just to name a few it takes to loose wt.Keep up the good work,it will pay off in the end.
    jane:smile:
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