my little rant...

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mishelnkiki
mishelnkiki Posts: 775 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
so i went to bed feeling super good last night. woke up, still feeling pretty good. come to the pc and i have a message from a guy on here who had defriended me... no biggy if u dont wanna be my friend then fine best of luck to u. what got me was the explanation for it. he said that i was contributing to his disorder. and by that he means i dont eat enough cals and im never meeting my deficit. NOW... i work 9 hours a day, spend 2 in the gym and am also a single mother of two children. i make sure to eat at LEAST the allotted amount. i try and stay between 1400-2000 cals per day. in my opinion, that is healthy. on my journey before when i lost 105 lbs in 6 months, i was only eating 500 cals a day and burning at LEAST 1000 cals a day at the gym. it wasnt healthy. so to me... for me to eat as much as i do now, and for it to be HEALTHY food choices is far from a disorder! It just seriously bothered me. i thought that we were all here to support each other, offer kind words. in my opinion, he could have given me suggestions on something with high cals and protein that i can eat maybe mid lunch. but no instead he said i was contributing to his disorder. just blew my mind! ok... i think i feel better now. thanks for reading!

Replies

  • crystal10584
    crystal10584 Posts: 334
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    screw it. As long as you are getting in 1200/day, you are doing it right.

    and if he has a disorder, it's not your fault... and he's dumb for blaming you. His food choices are his food choices. If he wants to eat what you eat, then it's his decision.
  • akaMrsmojo
    akaMrsmojo Posts: 762 Member
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    Rant away, how does your decisions impact his life. You are better off without him as a friend.
  • AnneGenevieveS
    AnneGenevieveS Posts: 436 Member
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    Sounds like it is a GOOD thing that he de-friended you. The rest of us are here to support you! !
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
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    Wow thats crazy
  • peanut352
    peanut352 Posts: 75 Member
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    OMG, that is just pathetic! The only one contributing to whatever his disorder may be is him!

    Your better off without a friend like him! Dont let it bother you for a minute!

    Do you! :flowerforyou:
  • bmontgomery87
    bmontgomery87 Posts: 1,260 Member
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    screw it. As long as you are getting in 1200/day, you are doing it right.

    and if he has a disorder, it's not your fault... and he's dumb for blaming you. His food choices are his food choices. If he wants to eat what you eat, then it's his decision.

    agreed. sounds like he needs to learn some discipline.
    just because a friend of mine eats poorly doesn't mean I'm going to.
  • flutterqueen04
    flutterqueen04 Posts: 278
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    Wow. Obviously HE has the issues, not you. Plus 1200 isn't the magic number for everyone. Some people can get away with netting less than that because of their built/body type. It does suck when people get on here and just assume they know everything and have strong (and WRONG) opinions about everyone else's weight loss journey. That irks me and I have unfriended strangers (because lets face it that is what they are) that have been too harsh for no reason. Unless you see someone only eating 500 calories and burning insane amounts at the gym then speak up but for the most part worry about yourself. Ugh. Sorry you had to wake up to that :(
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
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    Negative aspect eliminated. He did you a favor. Bask in your postives friend's comments.
  • sassylilmama
    sassylilmama Posts: 1,495 Member
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    Sounds like you are doing just fine. Him on the other hand........
  • Cordy_in_CT
    Cordy_in_CT Posts: 134 Member
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    DON'T let him rent ANY more space in your head!!!!! Sounds like you are doing a hell of a job - especially with all that's on your plate. (pardon the pun) :blushing:
    You are eating healthy, and not skimping on calories from what it sounds like. Even if you were, HOW WOULD that be contributing to somebody else's disorder?????
    You're better off without him (and any negativity) in your life!!!!
    Keep up the good work!!!!!:flowerforyou:
  • michelegbowman
    michelegbowman Posts: 195
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    Not to be the devil's advocate and certainly not to diminish your rant...

    ...but maybe your defriended friend is depressed or has some other kind of condition that doesn't allow him to think clearly.

    If he reads your rant, and he has some sort of depression, it may push him into a bad place.

    Depression is common and manifests itself sometimes in the way we eat.

    There is a MFP friend on this site I friended and I am worried about him and so are others....

    so please don't take his unfriend personally...his condition may need some kindness and understanding.
  • amuhlou
    amuhlou Posts: 693 Member
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    sounds like he has more than one disorder...
  • wsbri4
    wsbri4 Posts: 7 Member
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    You are doing great and I have always liked to see what others do so that I can get ideas. Just because you are losing doesn't mean it should upset others. Good luck!!!
  • missnikkiee
    missnikkiee Posts: 14 Member
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    Wow that is horrible! You should not have such negativity around you. It's his lost to lose a great person like you. As long as you're happy with yourself keep it up. The way you're eating/working out is suppose to be a way of life and not just a diet since diet really means "temporary" so keep doing what you're doing. Eating 500 calories a day and burning 1000 is not the way to go...life is meant to be enjoyed so enjoy it as much as you can =)

    Life is too short to deal with ignorance like that so keep your head up and remember not all of the MFP on here are a$$e$ like him....
  • monkeybelle83
    monkeybelle83 Posts: 141 Member
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    It sounds to me like he needs to take some accountability for himself and stop blaming things on others.
  • marleyfu
    marleyfu Posts: 16
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    Well done. I agree with monkeybelle83

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