The Calmness In Our Lives

I am passing this on to you because it really works,
and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives.

By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show,
you too can find inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed,"The
way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you
have started and have never finished."

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started
and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning,
I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of White Zinfandel,
a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a bottle of Kahlua, a package
of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the
rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of chocolates.
You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now.
Please pass this on to those whom you think might be in need
of inner peace.