Recovering from eating disorder..

I definitely had this problem back when I was around 14-15. What I didn't know back then, or really was just being foolish is that it wasn't helping my body or myself at all by completely restricting my diet, I was actually making things worse.

This time I'm focussed on being healthy while doing this. Our bodies need at least 1200 calories a day minimum for basic maintenance otherwise it actually reverses your hard work since it starts to slow your metabolism and go into starvation mode.

I've struggled with my weight all my life but this time I'm doing this through a slow process of eating better and exercising because at the end of the day weight doesn't come off overnight, and it shouldn't through means of not eating.

I don't want to gain back all the weight I lost again by how I did it before (I was 180 down to 130).

I'm the same way. I obsessively would count calories in and calories out a few years ago, and I'm always worried I'll start doing it again on here. I would say keep an eye on yourself, and as soon as you feel like you're getting a little carried away, stop and think about it. If it seems to be too much, maybe instead of tracking calories, track what foods you eat in a day. My mom does it that way; she keeps track of the food groups so that she knows if she's eating what she needs to and also controlling portions.

I'm the same way. I did WW when I was fifteen (and 125 lbs!). I haven't weighed myself in years, because I know that I'll get obsessed with the number. At the doctor's office, I always ask them not to tell me how much I weigh. This seems kind of counterintuitive to MFP, but I've been going based on inches and how my clothes fit instead.

What's helping me now, though, is knowing that I have to eat back my exercise calories. I feel rewarded for exercising and know that I HAVE TO eat back those exercise calories, or my body will go into starvation mode and not lose anything or get any healthier. It's still tempting, though, to exercise and see a huge calorie deficit, and feel a false sense of pride when I don't eat those calories back. My fiance also helps me keep on track and make sure that I'm eating enough. When he comes home from work, I gleefully tell him how many calories I have left, and that we can have popcorn while we watch a movie or whatev.

I also don't count one or two meals per week, and consider them "cheat" meals--as long as I don't go wayyyy overboard. I've learned to trust my body, and know that it will balance itself out as long as I eat right the majority of the time. The last thing I've learned is that guilt is contagious, and that tomorrow is a new day. If I go over, I don't dwell on it or try to not eat the calories that I went over the day before.

I definitely agree with rbrenner: MFP has been very supportive and encouraging with the idea that you need to eat a baseline to see progress. It's not a competition to see who can eat less, and starving won't work.

Best of luck, and if you ever want more support, feel free to friend me.

Welcome aboard! :flowerforyou: I have never suffered from an eating disorder and I have to say I still get obsessive of calories :ohwell:
I don't eat ALL of my exercise calories back because that is what works for me. General rule is that you are supposed to though.

Okay, so just to be clear, we're SUPPOSED to eat back the exercise calories?? or is our daily calorie goal the same regardless of exercise?

Yes, you're supposed to eat back the exercise calories. It's still ok to be plus or minus 100 calories per day. To be sure you're as accurate as possible for calories used during exercise, I'd look into getting a heart rate monitor.

Good luck!