I'm getting really nervous.

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BunnybeeJG
BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
in Motivation and Support
I have a driving test coming up... next week... next wed. actually.... I'm terrified.

I'm so sick of failing... so sick of having to go there and try again!! I'm really scared. This will be the... 6th time i'm taking it... :brokenheart: i can't take it anymore i can't handle the ignorance of all the drivers around me that disregard traffic laws and almost kill me on a daily basis... I can't handle everyone's pressure about how i'm worthless without a license.. and i'm sick of taking the bus and walking everywhere honestly.

I can't do this again!! I'm honestly thinking of just not going... I don't know what to do... I'm so tired of the impending failure..:sad:

i know how to drive.. my nerves get the best of me... EVERY time.. every single time and its never anything BIG just small.. but somehow... it always matters. This is so frustrating... I'm tired of crying... if i fail AGAIN ... its going to be a really bad day. bad... everything... it causes fights! and I'm .. i swear i'm going to have a stroke over this

help.:sick:

Replies

  • LiL_MisS_C
    LiL_MisS_C Posts: 332 Member
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    I hear ya girl, unfortunately I cannot help you. I too, am license-less and am absolutely terrified of driving! I know I will eventually get up the confidence to try again (I`ve already failed 4 times) once I get past my driving anxiety. Wish you luck, girl! xo
  • blakejohn
    blakejohn Posts: 1,129 Member
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    relax its a driving test it's going to be ok breath sounds like you building it up so it becomes a big problem. do you run? go for a long run workk things through. is this the writen test or the driving?

    you can pass a driving test

    Good luck
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    relax its a driving test it's going to be ok breath sounds like you building it up so it becomes a big problem. do you run? go for a long run workk things through. is this the writen test or the driving?

    you can pass a driving test

    Good luck

    its a driving test... actual driving. not written... that i got already... i breathe, i'm relaxed on the test for the most part but inside... i'm panicking i try to think its nothing but it doesn't work. I went to the gym before last time and it helped until my tester literally shattered my confidence by ripping my friends air freshener off the thing ... and yelled at me before we even left and then some *kitten* cut me off but... i got nervous lol so i...
    I'm really scared.

    my boyfriend is starting to think that i'm ... stupid and that theres something really wrong w me that i can't even pass a test...
  • kuarta
    kuarta Posts: 65
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    It is natural to be anxious about any test. I know I would be too if I had to take one, even though I have been driving for over 30 years! It might help if you actually verbalise your anxiety to the person doing the test. I know this has helped me in the past during interviews.

    And "failing" - no such thing until you stop trying. So keep on trying until success comes your way, as it surely will. Hope this helps.
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    It is natural to be anxious about any test. I know I would be too if I had to take one, even though I have been driving for over 30 years! It might help if you actually verbalise your anxiety to the person doing the test. I know this has helped me in the past during interviews.

    And "failing" - no such thing until you stop trying. So keep on trying until success comes your way, as it surely will. Hope this helps.

    no... i can't talk to them.. can't verbalize anything.. can't ask them to repeat themselves... nothing. Its not allowed... the last lady litterally chewed my head off for saying hello to her.
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    well.. not LITERALLY lol but ya. you know what i mean. she said i wasn't to talk to her that she would not repeat herself on directions and if i didn't hear her the first time then its my fault told me that the fresheners give her migraines... and that she had a headache... she got mad at me when i stopped as i was going slow in the parkinglot to avoid hitting a bird... i wasn't going fast enough to scare it off and i'm sorry but i'm not killing an animal.

    I think most of them think they are above you..
    the power goes to their heads maybe... and seeing my failure record... i'm starting to think i don't have a chance... that i'm doomed from the time i make the apt.
  • NoAdditives
    NoAdditives Posts: 4,251 Member
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    relax its a driving test it's going to be ok breath sounds like you building it up so it becomes a big problem. do you run? go for a long run workk things through. is this the writen test or the driving?

    you can pass a driving test

    Good luck

    its a driving test... actual driving. not written... that i got already... i breathe, i'm relaxed on the test for the most part but inside... i'm panicking i try to think its nothing but it doesn't work. I went to the gym before last time and it helped until my tester literally shattered my confidence by ripping my friends air freshener off the thing ... and yelled at me before we even left and then some *kitten* cut me off but... i got nervous lol so i...
    I'm really scared.

    my boyfriend is starting to think that i'm ... stupid and that theres something really wrong w me that i can't even pass a test...

    Honestly, a driving test isn't that big of a deal. I failed my first time because even though I was 19, I made a lot of mistakes. Big ones. I knew how to drive, I'd been doing for a few years. It was scary, I was stressed, the lady administering the test wasn't nice. I was lucky enough to get another test scheduled for the next week, I read the booklet from the DMV and I practiced a lot. I asked what mistakes I had made on the test and I made sure I didn't make them again. I passed the second time I took it because I learned from my mistakes and I was confident in myself. I was a little nervous because I didn't want to fail again, but I knew that I knew what I was doing. I had confidence in myself and my ability to drive. I didn't make the mistakes I had made the first time.

    So stop freaking out. If you really know how to drive you won't make a bunch of silly mistakes. Think about what you've done before that made you fail and don't do that stuff. Believe in yourself. If you are confident that you can pass, you will pass.
  • 38Gigi38
    38Gigi38 Posts: 115 Member
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    Relaxation meditation before you go to take the test might help you to not be so anxious. And try to look at it this way. 1. It's a driving test, that is all. If you don't pass it, it does not make or break you, it does not mean you are stupid or incapable of anything.
    2. You can survive without a driver's license, people do it every day. 3. Live, breathe, and relax. Try not to stress too much over it. I think you are working yourself into a frenzy before you even get there. 4.Take deep breaths, you know how to drive, so focus on each little task you are asked to perform during the test and don't think ahead. Do each step one at a time until you finish the test. You are losing weight, one of the hardest disciplines ever...if you can do that, then you can pass a driver's test! Keep telling yourself that YOU CAN DO IT, instead of worrying about not being able to do it... because YOU CAN DO THIS!!! I believe in you and I don't even know you...and if I can do that, then you should be able to believe in yourself.
  • NoAdditives
    NoAdditives Posts: 4,251 Member
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    well.. not LITERALLY lol but ya. you know what i mean. she said i wasn't to talk to her that she would not repeat herself on directions and if i didn't hear her the first time then its my fault told me that the fresheners give her migraines... and that she had a headache... she got mad at me when i stopped as i was going slow in the parkinglot to avoid hitting a bird... i wasn't going fast enough to scare it off and i'm sorry but i'm not killing an animal.

    I think most of them think they are above you..
    the power goes to their heads maybe... and seeing my failure record... i'm starting to think i don't have a chance... that i'm doomed from the time i make the apt.

    Birds will move. They always move. Sometimes they just walk out of the way once you get so close you can't see them anymore, but they ALWAYS move.
  • kappyblu
    kappyblu Posts: 654 Member
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    Do you remember an old episode of The Brady Bunch where Marcia (I think) was nervous before her driving test? Then she pictured her driving instructor in his underwear and felt much better and passed with flying colors? Hey, don't knock it till you try it. lol I am sorry you have such awful test anxiety. I really wish you luck hon, and while it is true that there are some idiots out there on the road, for the most part, people obey the laws. If they didn't, there would be a heck of a lot more accidents. Breathe deep in and out before your test.

    Maybe the thought of fights afterward are what is really causing your test anxiety. Put that out of your mind and live in the moment. And if you pass? GREAT! And if you don't? Try again! Remember these quotes from National Treasure?

    Ben Gates: You know, Thomas Edison tried and failed nearly 2,000 times to develop the carbonized cotton-thread filament for the incandescent light bulb.
    Riley Poole: Edison?
    Ben Gates: And when asked about it, he said "I didn't fail; I found out 2,000 ways how not to make a light bulb," but he only needed one way to make it work.

    You have found 5 ways of how to not pass a driving test....you only need 1 way to make it work. Do this, girl! You can do it!!! I am sending good thoughts your way! Let us know how you did later. Best wishes hon!! :flowerforyou:
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    Relaxation meditation before you go to take the test might help you to not be so anxious. And try to look at it this way. 1. It's a driving test, that is all. If you don't pass it, it does not make or break you, it does not mean you are stupid or incapable of anything.
    2. You can survive without a driver's license, people do it every day. 3. Live, breathe, and relax. Try not to stress too much over it. I think you are working yourself into a frenzy before you even get there. 4.Take deep breaths, you know how to drive, so focus on each little task you are asked to perform during the test and don't think ahead. Do each step one at a time until you finish the test. You are losing weight, one of the hardest disciplines ever...if you can do that, then you can pass a driver's test! Keep telling yourself that YOU CAN DO IT, instead of worrying about not being able to do it... because YOU CAN DO THIS!!! I believe in you and I don't even know you...and if I can do that, then you should be able to believe in yourself.

    not according to my grandmother... you can't survive without one... and I can't handle this anymore
  • blakejohn
    blakejohn Posts: 1,129 Member
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    well.. not LITERALLY lol but ya. you know what i mean. she said i wasn't to talk to her that she would not repeat herself on directions and if i didn't hear her the first time then its my fault told me that the fresheners give her migraines... and that she had a headache... she got mad at me when i stopped as i was going slow in the parkinglot to avoid hitting a bird... i wasn't going fast enough to scare it off and i'm sorry but i'm not killing an animal.

    I think most of them think they are above you..
    the power goes to their heads maybe... and seeing my failure record... i'm starting to think i don't have a chance... that i'm doomed from the time i make the apt.

    When he/she opens the door to get in the car ask what the F-do you want and when the put on the seat belt say what you think I'm not a safe driver then tell them to get out. then after the the test don't let them unlock the door and say I've better have passed this dam test because I know where you live :noway:
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
    Options
    while it is true that there are some idiots out there on the road, for the most part, people obey the laws. If they didn't, there would be a heck of a lot more accidents. Breathe deep in and out before your test.

    Maybe the thought of fights afterward are what is really causing your test anxiety. Put that out of your mind and live in the moment. And if you pass? GREAT! And if you don't? Try again! Remember these quotes from National Treasure?

    Ben Gates: You know, Thomas Edison tried and failed nearly 2,000 times to develop the carbonized cotton-thread filament for the incandescent light bulb.
    Riley Poole: Edison?
    Ben Gates: And when asked about it, he said "I didn't fail; I found out 2,000 ways how not to make a light bulb," but he only needed one way to make it work.

    You have found 5 ways of how to not pass a driving test....you only need 1 way to make it work. Do this, girl! You can do it!!! I am sending good thoughts your way! Let us know how you did later. Best wishes hon!! :flowerforyou:

    ya... it is what makes it worse but theres no way to avoid them its like it wouldn't matter if i had a lot of money and a good job and everything which i don't but if i did... it wouldn't matter still because in her eyes i'd still be a failure because I don't have a license.

    and here in las vegas, they really are bad. Idk how they passed i'm sure most probably don't even have licenses to be honest... when the walk sign is on they think that they can speed thru the crosswalk when someone is almost directly in front of their car they think that they don't have to pull over for an ambulance i actually watched some jerk drive in front of an ambulance slowly... someone could've died because that idiot wouldn't pullover. I have missed walk lights and been late for work because I've had to wait for them to all go when they are supposed to yield. when that crossing person comes up you have to flipping wait!!! that's MY rightaway. not theirs.

    I'm just... i feel defeated.
  • Ty_1227
    Ty_1227 Posts: 40
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    As someone who struggles with compulsive perfectionism, I totally get the anxiety that comes with this. Work on your mindset to help ease your nerves before the big day.

    One of the books I'm reading talks about a researcher who found that successful marriages tend to have a ratio of 5 positive interactions for every 1 negative interaction and argues that within ourselves we need to develop the same relationship w/ our own self-image. Come what may you won't be worthless w/o a drivers license. The 5-to-1 suggestion may sound trite, but in the past few days it has really helped me to not be as hard on myself as I typically am. If a worry or anxious thought about failing pops in your head, try and counter it with 5 positive thoughts on other areas in your life that you kick *kitten*.

    Each day that I've been trying to deal w/ my ADD and compulsive tendencies, I'm finding that one's personal outlook on any situation is a HUGE determining factor for success. Good luck!
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    When he/she opens the door to get in the car ask what the F-do you want and when the put on the seat belt say what you think I'm not a safe driver then tell them to get out. then after the the test don't let them unlock the door and say I've better have passed this dam test because I know where you live :noway:

    HAHAHAHAAH oh man THANK you for that ... slightly sadistic and awesome. They'd probably fail me and call the cops tho lol
  • makena78
    makena78 Posts: 162 Member
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    I failed my first time. I knew where everything was in my car but, completely blanked out when I was told to put my emergency lights on and then screwed up with mixing the blinker lights for wind shield wipers. Just that failed me. I was so nervous. Next time I took deep breathes and got a perfect score.
    Don't worry about the birds they get out of the way, cat or dog yes go slow for them. That instructor sounds like a jerk though. If she doesn't like her job she shouldn't do it. But, don't let their toughness get to you. Be strong and brave.
    And yes, there are a lot of people out there that drive recklessly but, if you don't and your alert then you will notice them and keep away. It's not that difficult, just keep alert and pay attention. You will be fine. Good luck and keep trying.
  • blakejohn
    blakejohn Posts: 1,129 Member
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    When he/she opens the door to get in the car ask what the F-do you want and when the put on the seat belt say what you think I'm not a safe driver then tell them to get out. then after the the test don't let them unlock the door and say I've better have passed this dam test because I know where you live :noway:

    HAHAHAHAAH oh man THANK you for that ... slightly sadistic and awesome. They'd probably fail me and call the cops tho lol

    ok for real you should be driving like everyday practice practice practice when I took my daughter we drove days before and the day for the test we went for about 3 hours before the test you can do it
  • Tree72
    Tree72 Posts: 942 Member
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    I hope you find this encouraging rather than not... but a good friend of mind did not get her license until she was 39. But she has it now. :) So I believe that you can do this!
  • thetrishwarp
    thetrishwarp Posts: 838 Member
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    Try to pretend you're driving around with your mom or someone similar - where you'll be on your best driving behaviour but there's no pressure. I have to do my next level in about a month so I understand how nervewracking it can be - but you can DO this!

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