It's a shame...

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color_me_skinny
color_me_skinny Posts: 106
in Health and Weight Loss
I think I would go as far as saying about 90% (or more) of you MFPer's on here are WONDERFUL! 5% or so are bad seeds, and about 5% *might* mean well but you come off as "hollier then thou" etc. (this is just from the people I have came across. not saying it is how it is and thats the end of it...but what ive experienced...)

Anyways. I want opinions. I have a few people on MFP who have wonderful advice and great little "tips". But I feel like these people do more harm then good. Because while on one hand they have good advice, I feel like they never think anything I do is "right" or "good enough". I have people who are "shoving" things down my throat. "Go buy this. Buy that." and I have heard "You will never truly succeed until you have ____."

I feel like anyone who is trying to better themselves is doing a great thing. I do not feel like you HAVE to buy a bunch of products to "succeed" in this journey. If you want to, that is great. More power to you. But it isn't a MUST! I feel like you can do things with what you already have to get the same results or to get you on the right path and to a healthy lifestyle.

So my question is...do I keep these people around? After all they have great advice sometimes. Or do I give them the ol boot. After all I feel like they are often discouraging to me and make me feel like I'm a failure, or on my way to failing...

Replies

  • bcpie
    bcpie Posts: 89
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    People who are here to sell stuff to desperate dieters..are shameful. :/ boo @ them. I haven't experienced it at all, but I've seen quite a few people complain about it.
  • goldenbutterfly
    goldenbutterfly Posts: 64
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    give them the boot, unless of course you personally know them then thats a diffrent story.
  • Atlantique
    Atlantique Posts: 2,484 Member
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    I think I would go as far as saying about 90% (or more) of you MFPer's on here are WONDERFUL! 5% or so are bad seeds, and about 5% *might* mean well but you come off as "hollier then thou" etc. (this is just from the people I have came across. not saying it is how it is and thats the end of it...but what ive experienced...)

    Anyways. I want opinions. I have a few people on MFP who have wonderful advice and great little "tips". But I feel like these people do more harm then good. Because while on one hand they have good advice, I feel like they never think anything I do is "right" or "good enough". I have people who are "shoving" things down my throat. "Go buy this. Buy that." and I have heard "You will never truly succeed until you have ____."

    I feel like anyone who is trying to better themselves is doing a great thing. I do not feel like you HAVE to buy a bunch of products to "succeed" in this journey. If you want to, that is great. More power to you. But it isn't a MUST! I feel like you can do things with what you already have to get the same results or to get you on the right path and to a healthy lifestyle.

    So my question is...do I keep these people around? After all they have great advice sometimes. Or do I give them the ol boot. After all I feel like they are often discouraging to me and make me feel like I'm a failure, or on my way to failing...

    First off, anyone trying to get you to buy something from them or any company with which they are affiliated is violating the rules of this site and should be promptly reported and de-friended. There are a few companies who prey on MFP'rs in this way and the MFP Admins won't put up with it.

    If you don't feel that you're getting the kind of support that you want, then you don't need those folks on your friend list.
  • McKayMachina
    McKayMachina Posts: 2,670 Member
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    This is about you. I delete people I don't get along with. That has only been like two people since January. I also delete people who are inactive for more than two weeks (unless they are on vacation or something) and avoid a few misled loudmouths on the board. Don't feel bad about it. It's your account. :)
  • theresabell67
    theresabell67 Posts: 97 Member
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    I'm sorry this has happened to you. I personally would give them the ole boot!!! If they are not here to support you 100% them "pooh" on them
  • crystal_sapphire
    crystal_sapphire Posts: 1,205 Member
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    yeah that's pretty counter productive
  • emaybe
    emaybe Posts: 187 Member
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    Honesty is always the best policy in situations like these... if they're bugging you, chances are they're bothering other folks too. Do the world a favour and send them a private message to tell them how these comments are making you feel, but that you appreciate their other advice and encouragement. Chances are they don't even realize they've offended or upset you. If they can't handle the truth, then it's time to drop them from the friends list. :)
  • luv2ash
    luv2ash Posts: 1,903 Member
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    I think you should keep them around and just take their remarks with a grain of salt.

    I, too, always tell people that it does not require a bunch of fancy low-calorie labeled foods that the fancy excecutives in the food biz are making millions off of from all the people on diets. I used to be one of those people every time I would follow WW diet. I would go out and by all that skinny cow stuff, and anything marketed by WW or lean cuisine, or healthychoice, just because it was made for me seeing as how I was on a diet. But really what we all need to do is just eat high quality foods. Read labels and know what you are eating.
  • Heather75
    Heather75 Posts: 3,386 Member
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    If the benefit of having them around outweighs the annoyance you feel, then keep them. Only you know the answer to your question.

    Now get out of here and buy yourself some gravity boots or you will be morbidly obese by tomorrow and for the rest of your life.
  • teasha43
    teasha43 Posts: 101
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    If their thoughts make you feel bad about what you are doing, I would either confront them or delete them. I look at MFP as a support system. If the advice is asked for and received well , then great...if not it can do more damage than good. I believe eating and exercising are important for our fitness goals.....but I also believe that the mental battle is even bigger. Eliminate negativity as much as you can:)))) Besides, the do-gooders may have "seen the light" so to speak, but you may see it differently.... they were most likely doing things differently previously or wouldn't probably be on this site.
  • rice161
    rice161 Posts: 59
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    It's hard enough to stay motivated to work on this daily without worrying about people that make you uncomfortable. Remembering that most are trying to help will make it easier, but you can also control what posts on your page so your option!

    I could not agree more that products or certain items are NOT needed. I did things that way before and feel like for the first time, I am doing something sustainable and reasonable without spending money (weight watchers for me in the past). I don't belong to a gym even this time but walk my neighborhood, ride my bike, and started taking Zumba for rainy days! I feel better and my dog loves the walks so find what it is you enjoy, food or exercise wise, and let everyone else do it their way. Good Luck!
  • Jennwith2ns
    Jennwith2ns Posts: 296 Member
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    I agree with all the PP's.. this is YOUR journey. If they want to choose certain foods, workouts, etc that is their own choice and this is yours. Just delete them!
  • nikibob
    nikibob Posts: 165 Member
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    if they aren't helping you, they are hurting you! trust your judgement and it won't steer you wrongly!
  • sassylilmama
    sassylilmama Posts: 1,495 Member
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    Anything negative in my life gets the boot.

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