Saboteurs in your life

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jimjamsjet
jimjamsjet Posts: 57 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
So does anybody else have someone in their life (yourself included) who sabotages every attempt at getting fit. My mother (whom I sadly live with) seems to make every attempt to ruin my chances. Tonight, for the first time in ages I let her cook dinner which was my first mistake. She made a heavily marinated roast chicken with all the roast vegies. Everything was absolutely doused in oil and sauces and when I confronted her she said it is the only way she knows how to cook (my *kitten*). I find whenever she cooks, it is as unhealthy as possible and then seems to say it is my fault and refuses to believe that oil can be replaced/removed.

That was my rant about my saboteur, who is yours?

Replies

  • ugh1
    ugh1 Posts: 13 Member
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    My mum has close relatives who have fallen prey to anorexia. I think I'm mature enough to understand where I'm heading in life, and I'm pretty sure I don't have the will power and motivation to stray from the original plan of slight weight loss to a sudden ED lifestyle.. So, whenever I turn down a food (simple too...) she simply prepares an alternative which she knows I will eventually give in. It's frustrating because I don't want to hurt her feelings, but it's hard shedding some meat with her interference. In addition, at school during lunch, if I do not eat much people will stare. It's become a regular thing to bring a daily lunch and w/o it, I guess people are intrigued.
  • whiskey9890
    whiskey9890 Posts: 652 Member
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    i am certainly my worst saboteur, it sounds silly, but if i'm shopping i forget that i'm trying to loose weight and buy junk out of habit, and i refuse to waste food so end up eating it, the other saboteur is my boyfriend who i live with, he's 6'2" and grew up on a farm where he had to work like mad so has always had a huge appetite and he eats so fast its unreal, he always wants bacon sandwiches so there is always bacon in the house, he always wants a pudding after dinner he's as bad as me for wanting snacks and take out, and on the rare occaision he cooks you should see the portion he dishes up for me!!! plus he never tells me what he puts in his dishes either or what we are having in advance so its imposible to track accurately. oh heck he's cooking tomorrow!
  • lulabellewoowoo
    lulabellewoowoo Posts: 3,125 Member
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    ME, ME, ME!!!! I'm an emotional eater. And even though I know I shouldn't be "eating" my emotions, I sit and do it anyway. Every morning I say I'm going to stay in control. And at least by the third day, I've ruined it. Then it takes me a day or two to get back on track. Bad, bad cycle. But still working on it. Not giving up. Ever onward....
  • funfitfoodie
    funfitfoodie Posts: 630 Member
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    Same for me - when I'm staying at my parents during the holiday!

    My mum will try and often we have salad for lunch but then she'll think she's being nice by bring home chocolate as a treat. I hate to not accept it as she thinks that she's done something nice for me and I don't want to hurt her feelings.

    Right now I'm at home for easter and my sister is also here. My sister is obese and not on a diet - I have therefore already been offered a sausage sandwich for BREAKFAST and there are 4 chocolate muffins sat downstairs! ARGH :(
  • johnthefatman
    johnthefatman Posts: 205
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    Family are the worst - you need to be radical and risk offending her - next time she dishes up a meal like that - put half or more in the bin and fill your plate with salads/veg that YOU want to eat. Watch her while she cooks and count up the cals and adjust your portion to suit your daily goal. Mothers can be emotionally committed to keeping their sons fat as it lessens the chance of them fleeing the nest. Be strong for YOU.
  • chubbachub
    chubbachub Posts: 40 Member
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    I think I am probably my own sabateur. I am too quick to throw in the towel and make excuses.
    Friends too can be sabateurs. Often without knowing, maybe not so much with food but especially with alcohol. If I am losing weight, I'm not drinking, I don't see the point of all that time on the treadmill for alcohol - so I don't drink. Friends in the past have said I'm a killjoy and I'm boring! Maybe I am! Right now at this early stage I couldn't give a *kitten* what they think! I haven't told any of my friends I'm on a diet, I've been using MFP for under 2 weeks now and be away from family for that period too. So everything has been on my terms. No one has questioned why I'm running or just eating a salad and its been good to cement these habits before I see them again. They may not intentionally sabotage but just their questioning or their diet advice or how it worked for them....can grate.
  • jimjamsjet
    jimjamsjet Posts: 57 Member
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    I think it is easy to say to say risk offending someone but it often runs deeper than that due to some extenuating circumstances. I only recently moved back home as I lived away from home for four years for uni. Since moving back to Melbourne and trying to find a grounding, it just gets tougher and tougher.
  • casey12105
    casey12105 Posts: 293
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    My husband, and his family. He won't eat most healthy foods so I have to basically make 2 meals, one for me and one for him, and watch him eat the tasty stuff while I eat the bland crap lol. And his family is all on the big side and eat horribly, they eat out like 3-5 times a week and when his mom cooks she cooks everything either fried or loaded with butter, and when we're with them they act like I'm a stuck up ***** because I won't eat their food.
  • boyslie72487
    boyslie72487 Posts: 181 Member
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    I'd have to say my fiance. I had him sign up for MFP, thinking we could do it together, but he hasn't signed in in 3 days :explode: We went grocery shopping the other night and he wanted 5 bags of doritos and bbq chips... REALLY?! We can't get whole wheat crackers or veggie chips? He also thinks that topping everything with cheese is ok because "that's the only source of dairy I get." Don't get me wrong I love him for who he is, I just want him to be healthy. But when I see him eating chips and chocolate and watching tv the whole night, it makes me want to do that too. THANK GOODNESS HE'S CUTE! :tongue:
  • ngwehner
    ngwehner Posts: 19
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    I'm my own worst enemy, but I have learned to identify what sets me off, which goes a long way toward fighting it. I am a "stress" eater and an "idle hands" eater. The first has become less of a factor since I retired from a high level industry positon and now work as an independent consultant. But that has me working from home, which makes the idle hands aspect harder and the proximity to food greater. I do all the shopping (only when I've just eaten) and I do all the cooking. My husband eats what I eat and if he needs more he's welcome to go out to the kitchen and find/make something else for himself.

    I agree with the reply that you just have to stand tough and say no to those who are working against you - especially as most are trying to be "nice" or "treat" you. Explain as loudly and as often as neccesary that what they are doing is hurting you. Remember that you are in control. You and you alone a responsible for what passes your lips. Don't eat everything just because its put in front of you - eat a reasonable amount and quit - its thier problem if it goes to waste. Eventually they will learn to respect your choices. For really bad cases when you visit someone, take appropriate food with you and eat that. You can do this, but yes you may hurt some feelings in the process - just try to do it as gently as possible. It helps if you share the joy of your progress with these folks to help them understand what meeting your weight loss goals means to you. Good luck.
  • LJSpady
    LJSpady Posts: 311 Member
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    Ok, so I can already see, this is gonna turn into a but of a rant for me, sorry ya'll.
    My girlfriend and my roommates are all my biggest saboteurs. Let me start out by saying that I am 21 years old, and live with 4 other 19-22 year olds, ALL of whom are also overweight.
    The roommate who most recently moved in, we'll call him Joe, ONLY eats pizza, burgers and steak. I'm not even kidding. when he goes grocery shopping he buys like 10 frozen pizzas, a few pounds of hamburger meat, a few pounds of bacon (which is my biggest weakness) and a few cases of soda. The worst part is that he's really sweet and always willing to share his food. He hates eating re-heated pizza (weirdo), so he'll down like half of a pizza, then put the rest in the kitchen for anyone else to have if they want.... UGH!
    And then there's his girlfriend, we'll call her Red. Red has had a few instances of eating other people's food, which sucks for me cause 1. she eats fairly healthy, so she goes after fairly healthy food, and 2. I'm a broke, unemployed student , so I really can't afford to have other people eating my food. Now, don't get the wrong idea, she not a crazy sneaky food thief, she genuinely thinks that most of the healthy food in the kitchen is something her sister bought for her, so she thinks it's ok to eat it.... Well that leaves me with less good options, and to "make it up to me" she goes out and buys me.... ICECREAM?!!! yeah... bizzare.
    And then there's Red's sister, who also happens to be my girlfriend. She is probably the biggest saboteur of all. She likes to surprise me with presents, which is really very sweet, except these surprises are usually, icecream , or something sweet that is no good for me. She and I are suppose to be getting in shape together, but it wasn't until this week (we started in march) that she FINALLY took to buy healthier food at the grocery store. She still kinda throws a peg into my working out sometimes, she always wants to leave early, or causes us to get to the gym late, or we'll make a date to go to the gym, and "something will come up" so that our date gets broken. To be completely honest, it's more like she's sabotaging herself, but my efforts are getting some residual sabotage, since we're doing this together.
    My fourth roommate, Zander, is much like Joe, in that he buys a lot of food, like chinese takeout or hot wings and then doesn't finish it, so he offers it to me. Incidentally he's just started loosing a lot of weight a few months ago.

    So yeah. My roommates and their strange eating habits are hugely effecting my ability to stay on track.

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