The Skinny Husband Support Group.

CookieCatCatcher
CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
edited September 26 in Motivation and Support
:laugh:

So, my husband is a twig. He is 5'9", 122 lbs. I've always looked like a manatee next to him. (I was almost 40lbs heavier then I am now when we first met) I've yo-yo dieted since we've been together, and I finally got serious about losing this weight. Now, he is SUCH a weight loss saboteur! He brings candies, cookies, ice cream, chips, and all kinds of crap into the house. I don't buy the junk when I go grocery shopping, but, it will just "appear" in the house. He snacks on this crap constantly. It used to be such a huge temptation, but, I've just recently learned that my will power is stronger then his stupidity! :happy:

The new struggle: exercise. I'll ask him to go for walks or bike rides with me, and he wants to sit at home and play xbox instead. So, I bought an elliptical and now I work out in the bedroom (I don't really feel comfortable walking by myself) while he plays video games. No big deal. Right? Nope, he'll come in the bedroom and try to talk to me while I'm barely able to breath!

Does anyone else have a skinny hubby? One who doesn't know what its like to struggle with food and weight on a daily basis... He thinks its as simple as not eating. He doesn't understand why I need to log on to MFP and count calories, and track my exercise - because he has never had to be accountable for his weight. It's discouraging at best.

I'm looking for some MFP friends who know what I'm going through, and who would like to support others in the same position.

Replies

  • mandijo
    mandijo Posts: 618 Member
    Amen sister! I totally relate!
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
    My boyfriend is thin and in excellent shape. He's 5'6" and is 145lbs - most of which is muscle.

    When I'm down about not losing weight, he'll try and be supportive but I feel like it's hard for him to understand since he's trying to GAIN weight and I'm struggling to lose it. Don't get me wrong, I know he cares about me and wants to help, but I think it's hard for him to understand (just like it is hard for me to understand him wanting to gain -- though he wants to gain muscle and not fat).

    He doesn't eat candy, cookies, etc as a rule. I'm the one with the sweet tooth, so he doesn't bring stuff home that he knows I want but can't have.
  • Anidorie
    Anidorie Posts: 291 Member
    oh YES HONEY! i do know what that is like! my boyfriend can sit there and eat 2000 calories and not gain an ounce. i eat that and i gain two or three. its not fair! (wallows in self pity)
  • Im about 60 pounds heavier than my guy and I totally hate it to and he has no compassion for me or what I am going through and always brings treats galore home even after tell me honey you just buy what you need to eat and we will all eat that way.... Ya right! I am still working on my will power to BTW so I have to do things for myself like sugar free treats etc....
  • MarybethAltizer
    MarybethAltizer Posts: 226 Member
    Yeah I have one of those... He eats WHATEVER he wants and never gains. NOT fair. LOL He is super HOTTTT though, so I feel pretty lucky in that dept... =)
  • I dont personally... My partner is a huge inspiration because he works out pretty constantly and is in excellent shape but he has to work his *kitten* off for it.

    BUT! I have a Skinny Dad! He does the same thing! Brings **** into the house and then doesnt eat it, so it sits there for days or weeks just staring at me from the fridge or cupboard!
  • __flexylexi
    __flexylexi Posts: 154 Member
    Haahahhahahaha so... My husband was 6'1 and 140 lbs... and I mean I was skinny when we first started dating, then I gained weight... was 5'8 and 196 lbs.... :noway:

    Then I decided to hit the gym hard and start running, and he started hitting the gym hard too (army) so thennn
    TADAAA

    I (was) 160 (I am pregnant now so I gained weight! and he is 180 and getting bigger and sexier and more muscular!!! hehehehee :tongue:

    I told him-- "Babe I like this whole you getting bigger and me getting smaller thing" :love:

    OKAY but BEFORE the mutual understanding thing- he thought I would never lose weight because I kept eating (which I did) and he never eats, but when he does, it is all JUNK!!!!!
    Hopefully your hubby understand you soon... :(
  • KeepOnMoving
    KeepOnMoving Posts: 383 Member
    I feel your pain! My husband use to be skinny. He needs to lose weight. He is bigger than me and likes to tell me how to lose. I got him on the exercise habit. He exercises very early in morning - I am not a morning person. I exercise after work. Usually at home and I have my family interrupt me while I am trying a 30 or 60 minute DVD. Its like "just give me on hour." Food temptations are everywhere! Just when I try to be strong, he is cooking up something fattening or ordering something out high caloric. Temptations are at work too.
  • Nekoashi
    Nekoashi Posts: 220 Member
    Hehe I know the feeling, but my skinny hubby is super supportive about me wanting to lose weight, though he does sometimes forget that I can't have as much alcohol anymore and sweets :P So I'm making the same amount of food I always have, but I'm eating less and having him eat the portion I am no longer eating so he can gain some meat on those skinny bones ;)
  • brittanyscherich
    brittanyscherich Posts: 355 Member
    I'm so with you! It seems at least once a week, I'll come home from work, exhausted and starving. And my husband says to me " I just got pizza! Your favorite!" Oh, great. Thanks. lol
  • LoveDLady
    LoveDLady Posts: 64 Member
    My husband is 6'1" AND 145 pounds. I look like a mammoth next to him.
  • DonaGail
    DonaGail Posts: 190 Member
    Oh yeah..I hear you!
    My trigger and serious temptationis chips and dip, its very hard for me to stop eating them once I start and so I dont let them get near me.
    Last weel after working 12 hours mr.Man calls my cell when I was on my way home and is practically begging me to stop and pick up some chips on the way home.
    REALL?
    I told him that was like asking an alcoholic to buy berr and I didnt do it.
    He loses weight at the drop of a hat and was actually voted 'best body' in high school ( a really long time ago) so he doesnt really understand but tries to encourage me most of the time.
    WTH was he thinking? lol!
  • Nekoashi
    Nekoashi Posts: 220 Member
    I'm so with you! It seems at least once a week, I'll come home from work, exhausted and starving. And my husband says to me " I just got pizza! Your favorite!" Oh, great. Thanks. lol

    Sooooo true! :laugh:
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    WOW!

    I'm so glad to see that I'm not the only with the "skinny hubby" problem!
  • Athena413
    Athena413 Posts: 1,709 Member
    Oh, girl...I know EXACTLY what you're going through. I have my treadmill in the bedroom and he has his xbox in the living room. Maybe we can pair up on MFP and they can pair up on xbox live and we can workout while they play games! lol

    My husband is 6'0'' and weighs MAYBE 170 on a day he hasn't pooped yet. He can eat absolutely anything, whereas I look at something wrong and gain a pound!
  • Hi there Lindsy,

    i can totally relate to what you are saying about husbands being like that, lol. About the same time last year, my husband embarked on a weight loss challenge that saw him reach my weight, which was discouraging for me as it seemed like he could do it effortlessly. Being fatty-fat is something that runs in my family and you only have to look at a photo of my family on my dads side to see how "being big" is the norm. My husband would be drinking all kinds of protein shakes with added veggie stuff, what started getting to me is how he would brain wash my 6 year old daughter into believing what she was putting in her mouth was fattening and that she had to eat protein first. I understand that good eating habits start at an early age, but a six year old telling me what to put in my mouth first at the dinner table is a bit extreme.

    As I also wanted to lose weight, I asked for the same support, either we exercise together in the form of a walk or look into playing a sport together. Of course, my typical husband wants to work out on his own and only believed that I would slow him down, which felt like a big bummer. No playstations, but he is a movie junkie...just as bad.
    We have a treamill that my daddy bought and it wasn't being used, so I forced myself into using it. I then bought a set of weights to work out on my arms with the help of a LES MILLS body pump class I was able to download.

    Few months down the track and over Christmas, hubs put on the weight again...now I'm starting to lose the weight. I certainly feel good about myself, but it is difficult to steer clear of all the food he wants and craves. He just says the word and his daddy who is here on holiday whips it up....and yes, it's always fattening. I just have to keep telling myself that a healthy diet will ensure I look prettier, lol. NO pimples, clearer skin, teeth, hair, nails. Exercise makes you sweat=clears your pores etc. Not to mention that it will elevate your mood. That in itself should be enough encouragement for you to not give in to the temptations of the chocolates, chips and whatever it i that the hubs brings into the house as well as keep you going on the treadmill. Good luck with it all and perhaps you can keep us posted :)
  • I can DEFINITELY relate to this post! I also have a hubby that can eat anything and never gain weight.....very frustrating to say the least! I feel like I look at food and gain weight and he devours everything in sight and doesn't gain a thing...
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    Oh, girl...I know EXACTLY what you're going through. I have my treadmill in the bedroom and he has his xbox in the living room. Maybe we can pair up on MFP and they can pair up on xbox live and we can workout while they play games! lol

    My husband is 6'0'' and weighs MAYBE 170 on a day he hasn't pooped yet. He can eat absolutely anything, whereas I look at something wrong and gain a pound!

    For REAL! I saw you added me, so I'll give you his gamertag! What's your hubby play?
  • anewattitude
    anewattitude Posts: 483 Member
    My fiance is quite heavier than me however he could stand to lose a few pounds. I have never actually said he needs to lose weight but I have, on many occasions suggested we go for walks etc and its like pulling teeth! He doesn't understand why I spend so much time on this site. Well, quite frankly, I don't understand why he watches marathon episodes of the Simpson's, but whatever! We are moving into a new house together in a couple of weeks and I am converting a spare room to a workout room and he is getting on the elliptical ( when we get one) whether he likes it or not! Even if I have to promise to walk on the treadmill next to him naked! LOL. In his defence though, his commute to work and back is almost an hour each way so he is tired but I am trying to encourage him to be more active so I feel your pain. You want your husband to be more supportive of your choice to be healthy just like I want my fiance to embrace the concept of exercise!

    Good luck to you. Hopefully he will start to realize how much this means to you and decides to stop hindering your success.
  • Athena413
    Athena413 Posts: 1,709 Member
    Oh, girl...I know EXACTLY what you're going through. I have my treadmill in the bedroom and he has his xbox in the living room. Maybe we can pair up on MFP and they can pair up on xbox live and we can workout while they play games! lol

    My husband is 6'0'' and weighs MAYBE 170 on a day he hasn't pooped yet. He can eat absolutely anything, whereas I look at something wrong and gain a pound!

    For REAL! I saw you added me, so I'll give you his gamertag! What's your hubby play?

    Borderlands has been his latest obsession. Occasionally some Halo. Just depends on what he feels like blowing up on that particular day... :explode:
  • Kalee34
    Kalee34 Posts: 674 Member
    I hear you guys. Most of our married life I have been heavier than my husband. I was so excited to finally get down 25 lbs. below him, but now I'm pregnant and sure to be headed right back up there to his weight. Booo!! But, I will get right back at it, as soon as this baby gets here!!!
  • He might follow the path of my husband who sounds just like yours up until around 30-33 years old, when the metabolism fairy went away!! Flash forward 8 years, and he was nearly 60 lbs heavier than when we met. He has now had to relearn to eat, and must exercise to maintain.

    Once gifted with the super-human ability to eat and drink anything, he is now a mortal man. :)
  • curvygirl512
    curvygirl512 Posts: 423 Member
    I hate not having the support of my skinny husband!!

    He's 6' 3", and about 190 lbs. His idea of support is bringing home 10 1/2-gallons of breyers ice cream and then saying, "well, just don't eat it." In fact, we have so much ice cream in the freezer that sometimes there's not room for real food. I can't even be in the same room when he's eating it. Pardon my French, but this really pisses me off.

    At least my daughter inherited his build, she is as tall, slim and graceful as a gazelle. Of course, she got my brains and creativity, not to mention my humility. I try to keep this in mind as I strain to have any willpower. ; )
  • stephwats84
    stephwats84 Posts: 21 Member
    I feel the same way. Tim just has always been small compared to me, he can eat whatever he wants and still look the same!! He has never said anything about my wieght unless I say that i want to lose but he really doesnt understand what I struggle with!! So I am there with you, he is supportive but again can eat what he wants and not care its hard for me to do!
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
    Oh, girl...I know EXACTLY what you're going through. I have my treadmill in the bedroom and he has his xbox in the living room. Maybe we can pair up on MFP and they can pair up on xbox live and we can workout while they play games! lol

    My husband is 6'0'' and weighs MAYBE 170 on a day he hasn't pooped yet. He can eat absolutely anything, whereas I look at something wrong and gain a pound!

    For REAL! I saw you added me, so I'll give you his gamertag! What's your hubby play?

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
    "I'm working out! I found you an xbox friend -- go play with him and stop talking to me!!!"
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • cutmd
    cutmd Posts: 1,168 Member
    Omg, yes! Great thread! My hubby is a karate black belt and 6% body fat. He eats what he wants and doesn't gain a pound. I work out twice as much as him but still struggle with my diet. He doesn't get it at all. He thinks if you work out you can eat whatever you want. He is always cooking something heavy and delicious and gets mad if I don't eat a lot of it. He hates when I'm looking up or documenting calories or on mfp. It's all a silly waste of time in his opinion, although he's loved my results so far!

    I do have to say I have noticed he naturally will only eat 1-2 full meals per day and only eat when he's hungry. He also forgets to eat when he's busy. How can I be like that? :grumble: I started looking into leangains because of him
  • concordancia
    concordancia Posts: 5,320 Member
    My boyfriend is thin and in excellent shape. He's 5'6" and is 145lbs - most of which is muscle.

    When I'm down about not losing weight, he'll try and be supportive but I feel like it's hard for him to understand since he's trying to GAIN weight and I'm struggling to lose it. Don't get me wrong, I know he cares about me and wants to help, but I think it's hard for him to understand (just like it is hard for me to understand him wanting to gain -- though he wants to gain muscle and not fat).

    He doesn't eat candy, cookies, etc as a rule. I'm the one with the sweet tooth, so he doesn't bring stuff home that he knows I want but can't have.

    This is our situation - well, he is taller and lighter yet than that, but he needs to eat constantly. We both focus on being *healthy* rather than the perfect weight. I tease him a little about eating so much (seriously, who can eat three pieces of fruit in one sitting? An apple, a banana and an orange walk into a bar...), but we both weigh about what we did when we got together, so there is no question of each finding the other one super sexy!

    For those of you who have junk food appearing in the house (Mom, is that you?), have you tried suggesting that they limit that kind of food to outside of the house? I mean, sure, you would rather they eat healthy like you, but we can't really force motivation on others. However, keeping it out of the house is a matter of respect. Or, perhaps you are living with my father and then, I must say, there really is no hope, he just isn't going to change.
  • yarnhoarder
    yarnhoarder Posts: 36 Member
    My boyfriend is about 45 pounds lighter than me. I know what it feels like to be a house next to a tree. Either though my goal weight isn't going to get me under his weight I think I'll be happier with what I look like standing next to him at that point. I do envy his bottomless pit of a stomach. I know what you gals mean when you get annoyed with their eating. I'll be talking on the phone with him and he will be stuffing his face with potato chips. He will never gain an ounce of fat either. But we've got to love our skinny guys! :heart:
  • OMG yes.

    My husband used to be a very fat guy. 500 lbs, the whole bit. He lost it all, got down to 185, and has now gained back up to 230. So you'd think he'd understand, right? WRONG! WRONG WRONG WRONG!

    He didn't lose weight because he wanted to. He got surgery, so he could get another surgery (he's got a long list of medical issues). Once he lost the weight, he got TOO skinny, and NEVER STOPPED EATING LIKE A FAT KID. He drinks three orange sodas a day (Because I limited him) and lives off of hot links and pizza lunchables. and SO MUCH CANDY!

    He's gaining it back, so I'm trying to get healthier and get him in on it, but he doesn't really want to join me in this whole thing. He's going to ruin a $10,000 surgery by eating the way he does.

    Oooh, I love him so much though, don't get me wrong. Feels kinda good to get that out. Bahaha. He's a great guy though, he's sweet and kind and caring.
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