Sigh. I need to vent.

fancythis
fancythis Posts: 20
edited September 26 in Motivation and Support
I'm using this as my complaining vehicle, possibly becuase I'm hoping somebody will smarten me up!

For some stupid reason, today, I was totally comparing myself to the other women at the gym. I went to a different location this time, becuase I figured I'd shave some extra time for commuting, and that was a bit of a mistake. This different location I went to, was like the "booty short competition". Good grief. It was like who could walk around in Uggs and have the most *kitten* cleavage hanging out. And they were free weight hoggers/machine chatters. Like they'd leave a pile on the floor, not put them back, and then if anyone went near them, come and announce that "they were using them". I felt intimidated like I was back in high school and it sucked hard.

I already feel a bit down in the dumps because I've let myself get so jiggly. I had been doing well, and then life happened. Husband and I separated and ultimately divorced, sell the house, move to a different part of the city, etc. I have a wonderful boyfriend now who loves me for who I am, jigglies and all, but I can't stop kicking myself for letting it get away on me. I'm still nowhere near as heavy as I used to be, but it's still disheartening, you know?

Any tips on how I can just let it go already? I've tried all my reasoning and rational thinking and I'm spent on ideas.

Thanks for listening :-)

Replies

  • MochaMixAZ
    MochaMixAZ Posts: 844 Member
    It's so rarely a rationale process.

    I'm sorry you're feeling down.

    Here's what I got from your post:

    - You've had a lot on your plate. You let yourself fall lower on the priority list for awhile. But you're moving back up
    - You were doing something GOOD for yourself. You were at the gym. Period.
    - You found yourself looking at the environment and getting influenced by it. Natural, but don't let it hold domain over you. You have no idea what is going on in their lives... or what it likes to wake up in their heads. Or why they feel the need to showcase themselves at the flippin' gym. You'd probably be shocked at what is going on in THEIR minds.
    - You're a self-motivated girl that is phenomenal. As I said, you were AT the gym. You posted your thoughts and feelings here instead of going to a pizza joint and stuffing them down (something I've done in the past)

    I don't have the answer to making it better, but try to focus on the positives. And keep doing what you're doing. You're "jiggly" parts are probably endearing, and you're working on the non-jiggle factor. Keep it up!
  • ddroze
    ddroze Posts: 1
    Hang in there and just keep moving forward. You seem like a great person who had life kick her in the butt. Good for you. Its about you and your goals not others trying to make you feel intimidated.
  • Heather75
    Heather75 Posts: 3,386 Member
    Just be kind to yourself. Think about all the wonderful qualities you possess. You make a difference in somebody's life everyday and that is of great worth.
  • sarahs440
    sarahs440 Posts: 405
    I wish I had tips on how to let it go. I have a hard time with that stuff too. I obsess over things. Had some family issues over the weekend and finally I just gave it to God and said to myself, "I'm not going to worry about it anymore" It actually helped a little. I can't fix everything. Focus on eating right and working out, and you know you will start to feel better. Sorry for all the rought imes you have had. Hang in there!
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
    I can relate...it's very easy to compare ourselves to others...I guess my only advice is to try to focus completely on your workout--make it a competition against yourself, not others. Aside from the poor gym etiquette (weight hogging! I really dislike when people do that), pretend like you are in your own personal space...and block out what's going on around you as much as you can...YOU are what's important, and caring for yourself ("jigglies" and all) means taking the time to focus on YOU :)

    I hope this helps...and just keep working at it!
  • CassieLEO
    CassieLEO Posts: 757 Member
    I try not to let what other people look like make me feel bad about myself. I would never be caught dead wearing booty shorts anyways.
    As for the pile of weights hogger or the machine hoggers, I would call them out on it. I am out spoken like that. If you cant do that, then you should complain to the staff there. Most Gyms have the half hour rule if it is busy and people cant get to the machines. Dont let some little booty shorts wearing girls make you feel bad about yourself. Like someone said, you dont know what their journey is all about.
    You are doing just fine. You are moving forward and doing what need to. Kudos to you for doing so good lady! DOnt be down!!!
  • juliapurpletoes
    juliapurpletoes Posts: 951 Member
    You've gotten such good advice.....I don't just want to repeat it.....but I do want to send you a gigantic warm hug!!

    All the inconsiderate show-offy type gals will eventually figure it out.

    You are a wonderful, lovely, obviously big- hearted gal......hang in there.

    :flowerforyou:
  • VixFit2011
    VixFit2011 Posts: 663 Member
    Remember you are there for you.....not all the other chickies.
  • nitrobucky
    nitrobucky Posts: 1
    hi there im new here i just read what you wrote and i can say that life isnt all about body image and if you look hotter or comparing yourself to anyone.
    i used to do the same and id turture myself over it all the time. the best ive ever looked for years was when i had a mental breakdown and stopped eating. i would have 1 meal every 7 days becouse someone would shove food at me and force me to eat. i lost alot of weight and everyone was commenting how great i looked and yes i looked thin but they didnt see what i was doing to myself. i was a wreck inside i collapsed on the side of a roadway on a walk and was found by a passing motorist passed out. by the time the ambulance got there they had to perform cpr on me becouse i hadnt eaten a good meal in so long my body shut down.
    i have since pulled myself together somewhat and allthough ive put the weight back on im slowly starting to get it off the healthy way. i want it gone for good not just shred it by doing the wrong thing. just focus on yourself and your Boyfreind becouse in your life you are the 2 people that count. id be lost without my wife she is a great support for me and she knows that in order for me to feel good about myself i need to be happy at who is looking back at me when i stand infront of a mirror. dont forget that happyness is within and you just have to accept that the weight will come off it just takes time and yes thats the hard part. we all watch the adds on tv saying look at me i did this in x amount of time and its so easy. easy? yea sure like "not!" if it were easy then we would all be our ideal weight. just keep your chin up and remember your not alone. if your struggleing just remember that you dont struggle alone. there is allways someone out there doing it alot harder than we are.

    And Keep the posts comming :)
  • Mohooper32
    Mohooper32 Posts: 12
    You are definitely on the right track. You are going to the gym to exercise for one. Two, don't start comparing yourself or body to anyone else. You are UNIQUE! We are all made differently for a reason. Focus on the positives! Take one step at a time and One day at a time. Keep using us as an outlet but don't throw the towel in. Keep up the good work!
  • suzooz
    suzooz Posts: 720 Member
    Isn't it amazing how in a single moment that we can get transported back to high school? The good news is that we aren't there anymore, and we can come back to reality!

    You have a lot of great qualities, and a boyfriend who loves you just the way you are. You are working out to be healthier, and you have a ton of MFP friends that can help you along the way.

    How many of those "weight hogs" can say that? :laugh:
  • Nigel99
    Nigel99 Posts: 498 Member
    It happens to a lot of people, so you aren't alone in feeling like this. You've started along the right path, so keep going, and give it your best. Sounds like your boyfriend is supportive, and that counts for a lot. Don't let the little things bother you at the gym (not always easy, I know), and just focus on doing what you need to do to meet your goals.
  • fancythis
    fancythis Posts: 20
    You guys are wonderful, thank you all so much. I actually feel a little better just getting it off of my chest. :-)
  • thomalr6180
    thomalr6180 Posts: 94 Member
    Girl, I have been upset with similar inconsiderate people at my gym. Unfortunately, the gym is in my building at work, so, a lot of them are co-workers. I just try to put my frustrations into my workout. That way you win, not them. :flowerforyou:
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