What does motivation look and feel like?

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Hi all! This is my very first post here on MFP. I'll keep this short and sweet. I've been wanting to lose weight for the past 3 years, and have done 2 rounds of the biggest loser where I work as well as joining Weight Watchers 3 or 4 times. It never sticks. I get discouraged, frustrated, and then....I EAT! I am at my all time high and every time I look in the mirror I think "What have you done to yourself?" People keep telling me...you just aren't there yet. Problem is, I worry I'll never "BE THERE". I don't know how to get motivated and don't think I'd know what motivation is anymore or what it would even feel like. I love to eat and hate exercise...a bad combination to say the least!

Anyways...I'd love to hear what got you all motivated, how it felt to be motivated, etc...etc. And any tips on how I can get motivated and STAY motivated would be great. Thanks everyone in advance.

Replies

  • pinkakira1
    pinkakira1 Posts: 235 Member
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    I have to say for me when it "clicked" was when I started to exercise and then then started using MFP logging my food. I was exercising and thought I was eating good... salad whole wheat blah blah blah but when it really clicked is when I started logging my food and my exercise... I kind of had that ah ha moment. I know that sounds so weird but I think things just didn't click till then. I had to input those number and then see exercising making thos numbers change I was like. Oh now thats how that works. Its was like magic. I lost 20lbs like that!

    I have to say I had been struggling trying every diet I could think of getting frustrated and quitting so I know where you are coming from. I can't say I am perfect I have gained weight back when I started eating like crap and not going to my Zumba classes but I am back on the horse and I am confident that if I eat better things and work out I will drop the 10lbs in no time. It takes both if you just do one or the other you will be spinning your wheels and get no where!

    Get a heart rate monitor and start small like walking around the block. I started Zumba cause I love dancing. I don't feel like I work out when I do it but I have to go to an actual class the videos don't motivate me. I need someone else to yell at me or I will just slack off. lol

    Oh I also joined a group challenge and boy that was a great support! I seem to do best in challenges and it really helps you bond with other MFP girls/ guys. Good Luck add me I would love to help you in any way I can. Again I am not perfect so no judgement here. o:)
  • Chrissy6302
    Chrissy6302 Posts: 14 Member
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    Getting started was the hardest for me, becasue i had every excuse in the world. One day i decided to get off my butt and go for a walk and realized it felt good. That made me challenge myself to do a little more each day until it was a competition with myself. I have my days where i want to sit and eat especially with the weather changing and tshirts and shorts make way for sweatshirts and jeans. But if i give myself one cheat day it turns into many more. I have been up and down and finally reached my heaviest and couldnt look at myself anymore.
    Think of ways to not think of it as a diet...its a lifestyle change.
    I hate the word diet and i think we focus on that too much. Think and imagine a healthier you and just make that leap.
    Trust me i hate to exercise as well and love food, i just changed what i ate and am satisfied.
    I have my days where i feel down becasue i wish the weight would come off faster, but i just do what i can to snap out of it and think about what i have accomplished. I also make short term goals for myself, and that helps.
    I am rewarding myself $5 for each pound lost so i can go shopping when i get to the spot i feel is good.
  • cmabnx
    cmabnx Posts: 76 Member
    edited October 2014
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    i was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes in August. i have a 4.5 year old who means the world to me. those two things combined is my motivation. being diagnosed was a blessing in disguise. i just have NO OTHER OPTION but to get healthy. period.

    try just adding in steps when you can. i now park far away from my work entrance. i walk around the interior of the building to get to the bathroom or lunchroom. i walk 20 minutes during my morning break and 30 minutes during my lunch break.

    i log EVERYTHING. it's eyeopening. and motivating IMO. also, my food/exercise diary is open to my friends and that helps me keep me on track.
  • BoutThatBass
    BoutThatBass Posts: 19
    edited October 2014
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    For me, I had to figure out why I was overindulging with food - once I understood that, I was able to identify what I needed to change in my life to support myself in making healthy choices. (For me, it was finding a new job that didn't demand my constant, round-the-clock attention and didn't require a soul-sucking, hours-long commute.) Since I've made those changes, it's been easier to stick to my diet and exercise goals. Now my whole life is set up to make it as easy as possible for me to make good food and exercise choices, so I don't have to fight to "stay motivated," because making good choices just isn't that hard.

    Fix whatever is enabling/encouraging you to make food and exercise choices that you're not happy with, and you'll find it a lot easier to change.
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
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    I stopped being on a DIET. I started making some new habits and got them to stick. I changed my lifestyle bit by bit and am still working on it. It's been over 4 years and I am still working on it and learning and tweaking. Motivation comes and goes.
  • SGM_Adonis
    SGM_Adonis Posts: 1,565 Member
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    Motivation feels like a nice fitted shirt, a pair of jeans that you wear nicely...a more upright walk. A little more swagger in your step.
  • knitapeace
    knitapeace Posts: 1,013 Member
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    I wish I had a good answer for you. I know that for me, what motivates me is building on previous results. I have had success beyond what I ever imagined with calorie counting and cardio, and as I add more weight training into my routine I get excited thinking about what is going to happen inside my muscles every day as I stick to my program and get stronger and leaner.

    What does motivation "look" like? To me it looks like me getting out of bed at 5am even though I don't want to, hair askew and eyes blurry, stumbling to the bathroom to get my workout clothes on before I change my mind.
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
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    You have to realize this is going to be a constant process, learning how to eat appropriately and doing it consistently. Not just some diet you go on, lose the weight and that's it. I would suggest that the reason you have not been able to be successful and consistent is that you restricted too much, went on these crash diets that are not sustainable. If you take your time you can learn a way to live that is sustainable to lose the weight and keep it off. Yes it takes longer, but it will last. Otherwise you will keep doing this yo-yo thing.

    Motivation is something else. This is making a decision and sticking with it. Some days you won't feel like it. But if you make these changes into habits and part of your life, you will just do it, like brushing your teeth and doing the dishes.
  • bigblueeyes1
    bigblueeyes1 Posts: 52 Member
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    Thank you all for taking the time to read and respond to my post. It is comforting to know I'm not alone in my struggle. I had thought it "clicked" for me last year, but I guess not. I am too easily influenced by all the "bad" food all around me. I think that's my biggest struggle. Feeling like I CANT EVER have my desserts (my biggest flaw), my dinners out, my French fries, or never being able to indulge in eating more than I should. Excuses excuses right??

    I throw some more excuses in the mix...no time, worry about loose skin, too expensive to eat healthy etc.

    My weight has started to affect my health. My sugar was a bit higher than it should be (just by 7) and my blood pressure has slowly been rising. This should be my motivation alone ESPECIALLY since I struggle with health anxiety.

    The weight gain started 4 years ago when my boyfriend broke up with me. I've been single and gaining weight ever since with no desire to date. I have an appointment with a therapist and plan to bring up the weight.

    I also have a daughter who I want to set a good example for and be healthy for. It's just so darn hard to resist food. Oh and I still live with my parents so I don't have much control as to what is bought in the store. A lot of times I do have a healthy dinner planned, but I get home and am asked "We were going to order something, do you want anything?!" Ummm..of course I do!!!

    My parents aren't the most supportive even though my mom is overweight and has struggled all her life
  • sodakat
    sodakat Posts: 1,126 Member
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    If you are so focused on what you "can't" eat when you are trying to lose, maybe you need to rethink your food plan.

    Example: previously when I decided to "cut back" or "watch what I ate" the first thing I would do was stop putting the French Vanilla creamer in my coffee because it's "fattening". Well, that sucked because I like[/] creamer in my coffee and not having that enjoyable coffee every morning was not satisfying. But, when I learned about and began using MFP I decided that I was willing to "spend" 105 calories on 3 tablespoons of creamer. I didn't feel deprived. Soon figured out that 2 tablespoons (70 calories) were enough, especially if I didn't fill my cup totally full of coffee, and now I mostly use just 1 tablespoon (35 calories). It was a choice I made, knowing I could have as much creamer as I was willing to expend calories on.

    Along a similar line, I buy treats that I like and make them fit in my day. I'm pretty motivated to lose weight so some days I tell myself to wait until tomorrow to have whatever it is I want, then may not want it tomorrow, but some days I have the food item and just eat however many calories less in other foods. Some days I may go over by a couple hundred calories because I couldn't talk myself into waiting or not having the treat and my full calories of other foods -- but those days can result in no weight loss for the week so I try not to do that too often.

    There are ways to make calorie counting work for you, and your circumstances.

    Maybe you should just eat as you are right now, and keep track of all your foods without restricting. That would give you an idea of where you might be able to cut back without stressing yourself.

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  • BeingKevin2
    BeingKevin2 Posts: 13 Member
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    Sadly it took the realization that my wife wouldn't have a husband, nor my young son a dad, for very much longer if I didn't change. The fear of an early exit from this world and leaving them behind was what it took to finally convince myself that changing my lifestyle to a healthy lifestyle was necessary.

    I know that is sad, and it hurts me to even write it, but it is the ugly truth. I also know there are many people just like me out there that can't change even then. Nothing about getting yourself in the right frame of mind to understand how important this is was easy for me, and it might not be for you, but once you get there the rewards are undeniable. Good luck!
  • zeltoria
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    Thank you all for taking the time to read and respond to my post. It is comforting to know I'm not alone in my struggle. I had thought it "clicked" for me last year, but I guess not. I am too easily influenced by all the "bad" food all around me. I think that's my biggest struggle. Feeling like I CANT EVER have my desserts (my biggest flaw), my dinners out, my French fries, or never being able to indulge in eating more than I should. Excuses excuses right??

    I throw some more excuses in the mix...no time, worry about loose skin, too expensive to eat healthy etc.

    My weight has started to affect my health. My sugar was a bit higher than it should be (just by 7) and my blood pressure has slowly been rising. This should be my motivation alone ESPECIALLY since I struggle with health anxiety.

    The weight gain started 4 years ago when my boyfriend broke up with me. I've been single and gaining weight ever since with no desire to date. I have an appointment with a therapist and plan to bring up the weight.

    I also have a daughter who I want to set a good example for and be healthy for. It's just so darn hard to resist food. Oh and I still live with my parents so I don't have much control as to what is bought in the store. A lot of times I do have a healthy dinner planned, but I get home and am asked "We were going to order something, do you want anything?!" Ummm..of course I do!!!

    My parents aren't the most supportive even though my mom is overweight and has struggled all her life

    I worry about loose skin to and then I realized...ummm does the fat on my arms and neck look anybetter then lose skin?????? Seriously what was I thinking.
    As for living with your parents, well tell them up front this is what you need and say no to ordering something or order something and cut into 2 or 3 meals... I do that when I go out
  • MsWendyjc
    MsWendyjc Posts: 63 Member
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    I've always wanted to lose my extra weight but never wanted to become a "gym junkie" that is i don't want to live in the gym, I have an active life which includes riding dirt bikes, camping and photography and i just don't want to dedicate myself in that way. I tried for what felt like the longest time 12 months ago to lose weight and joined the gym, was exercising daily, I couldn't not get below 198Ibs (89.9kilo) no matter what i did!! Anyway i gave up and for the longest time tried to pretend i didn't care. Now i have been on LiteNeasy for 3 weeks and not going to gym, cycling 10k (6 miles) most mornings or walking in the afternoon and i have lost 14Ib (6.5 kilo) in 3 weeks. LitenEasy supply meals, which is educating me in portion control and new recipe ideas, None of it impossible to create at home with a little time and preparation.

    My point if you've made it this far is for the longest time people told me its 80% what you put in your mouth and 20% exercise and now it's working and they were right!! You need to find what works for you and know the motivation is in the scales and the ppl that are proud of you when you achieve a loss. I log everything on MFP and have great support from friends here who are on the same journey!!

    You can do it :)
  • fitfreakymom
    fitfreakymom Posts: 1,400 Member
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    SGM_Adonis wrote: »
    Motivation feels like a nice fitted shirt, a pair of jeans that you wear nicely...a more upright walk. A little more swagger in your step.
    This



  • kenyainez
    kenyainez Posts: 222 Member
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    Something I always say is connect with your why. Why you want to do this, why is this important and how will your life change if you accomplish this. Once you answer these questions to yourself, you take that desire and apply it to every tool you feel can help you along your way. Workouts, websites, eating plans, gyms, and the like are all mere tools to your overall why. Your why is the will, anything else is the way. HTH \o/
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
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    Thank you all for taking the time to read and respond to my post. It is comforting to know I'm not alone in my struggle. I had thought it "clicked" for me last year, but I guess not. I am too easily influenced by all the "bad" food all around me. I think that's my biggest struggle. Feeling like I CANT EVER have my desserts (my biggest flaw), my dinners out, my French fries, or never being able to indulge in eating more than I should. Excuses excuses right??

    I throw some more excuses in the mix...no time, worry about loose skin, too expensive to eat healthy etc.

    My weight has started to affect my health. My sugar was a bit higher than it should be (just by 7) and my blood pressure has slowly been rising. This should be my motivation alone ESPECIALLY since I struggle with health anxiety.

    You can do this, you just need to change your thinking and your approach.

    I know what you mean, there is this really great bakery / deli and they have all of their "goodies" in those glass cases right in front of you. I can go in there when I'm not "on a diet" to get lunch and I'm not even tempted by the goodies. But the minute I have the thoughts in my head about dieting and losing weight, then the temptation is there big time. Because now I'm thinking "I can't have that" that is when I want it most. If it is allowed, then most of the time I choose not to eat it. Weird how the mind works.

    You CAN have whatever you want, but you need to have less of it. Or, you need to offset those choices to make room for it. If I go to Burger King today and I decide to get a whopper with cheese and large fries, then tonight for dinner I'm going to have just an omelet with no toast so that I can meet my calorie goal for the day. Or, if I go over on calories, I'm going to have to fit in a workout tonight to burn off that extra. If instead, I go to Wendy's for lunch and get a large chili with cheese, that is only 340 calories, then I can have a big dinner AND ice cream for dessert, with no need to do a workout. It's all about choices.

    So, in short, you can still have "junk". But you have to be a little more careful about how you fit it in. If you do fit it in, then you are less likely to feel deprived and you can do it long term.

    If you have a significant amount of weight to lose, you can set it to lose 2 pounds per week. If you find that you have a hard time with the amount of calories it gives you, try setting it to 1.5 pounds per week, you will have a few more calories to play with (like enough for a small dessert). You will still be losing weight. And as you go along, you will learn what things you can maybe give up long term and what things you don't want to give up and how to fit them into your day, or what things can be a treat once a week, like the person who talked about the coffee creamer.

    I know that you want to take off all the weight right now as fast as possible, but it took time to put on and it will take time to take it off. Doing it without a crash diet will enable you to keep it off, and it doesn't have to be totally miserable. :)

    There will be days where you don't make good choices and you are going to be over. Don't quit, just keep going and try to be more and more consistent. You can do it.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,868 Member
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    It will ultimately have to be about more than just losing weight. The people I've known that have had the most sustained success (including myself) are in it for overall health...being at a healthy weight is just a nice bi-product of living a healthful lifestyle.

    "Healthy" food doesn't have to taste like cardboard...you don't have to eat like a little birdie...you can have more than just salads and celery sticks. Pretty much all of that right there is why people have such a hard time...they're way too restrictive and don't actually understand proper, balanced nutrition. They think they have to suffer...you don't...I never suffered...not now and not during my weight loss. I simply sought out better nutritional options and ate a bit less and moved a bit more...

    Once you figure out that it's simply a matter of living a more healthful life and making healthful habits, it's no biggie. Motivation comes and goes...habits die hard (whether they're healthy habits or bad habits). I exercise regularly because it's a healthful habit that I have established...I am not always motivated to do so...but I do anyway...kinda like the dishes.
  • scoronado3
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    What kind of workout do you do?
  • bigblueeyes1
    bigblueeyes1 Posts: 52 Member
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    Scoronado3...currently? I do not work out. I actually just put my planet fitness account on freeze.