Desperately Seeking Motivation

loriannhoffman
loriannhoffman Posts: 10 Member
edited September 19 in Motivation and Support
Hi All,

My name is Lori Ann. I am a 44 year old mother of 3 (grown and out of the house) children, in Pennsylvania. I started on Fitness Pal about a month ago and have somehow...fallen away.

Yesterday I received an email from Fitness Pal telling me that I haven't logged my food in over a week - and not to give up.

How cool is that? A website that checks up on you!!!

I am just so disgusted with myself. 5 years ago I was a certified personal fitness trainer at a local gym. I was in a size 5 and weighed about 130 on a bad day.

I was at the time going through a divorce (guaranteed weight loss), but I also was SO diciplined. Partly because the gym owner was a buff guy who trained me regularly and kept me real.

I met my soulmate Carl at the gym and almost immediately moved in together. I thought that he would be the best thing for me. You see - Carl is 49 and has been battling type 1 diabetes since age 21 and I thought that because of that he would have to eat good and would most likely be an expert at eating right. Eating well has always been by downfall.

HA! Carl eats horribly. He hates veggies and about the only veggies I can get him to eat are canned corn, canned carrots and canned green beans. BLEECH!!! He has in the past year got me hooked on UTZ Rippled Potato Chips (I never ate potato chip before Carl)...He has also had a lot of health complications in the past 2 years. He had been diagnosed with diabetic neuropathy, and arthritis in his neck and back. Therefore he does not feel like working out very much these days...and I hate working out alone.

He hated my trainer at the gym (who was also my boss) so I ended up quitting at the gym and getting a "sit down" office job.

In the past 5 years I have put on over 40 lbs.

I don't even want to get back to where I use to be. I would be really happy to get down to 140. (I am currently about 185).

I am seriously lacking motivation - and I hope I came to the right place.

Replies

  • loriannhoffman
    loriannhoffman Posts: 10 Member
    Hi All,

    My name is Lori Ann. I am a 44 year old mother of 3 (grown and out of the house) children, in Pennsylvania. I started on Fitness Pal about a month ago and have somehow...fallen away.

    Yesterday I received an email from Fitness Pal telling me that I haven't logged my food in over a week - and not to give up.

    How cool is that? A website that checks up on you!!!

    I am just so disgusted with myself. 5 years ago I was a certified personal fitness trainer at a local gym. I was in a size 5 and weighed about 130 on a bad day.

    I was at the time going through a divorce (guaranteed weight loss), but I also was SO diciplined. Partly because the gym owner was a buff guy who trained me regularly and kept me real.

    I met my soulmate Carl at the gym and almost immediately moved in together. I thought that he would be the best thing for me. You see - Carl is 49 and has been battling type 1 diabetes since age 21 and I thought that because of that he would have to eat good and would most likely be an expert at eating right. Eating well has always been by downfall.

    HA! Carl eats horribly. He hates veggies and about the only veggies I can get him to eat are canned corn, canned carrots and canned green beans. BLEECH!!! He has in the past year got me hooked on UTZ Rippled Potato Chips (I never ate potato chip before Carl)...He has also had a lot of health complications in the past 2 years. He had been diagnosed with diabetic neuropathy, and arthritis in his neck and back. Therefore he does not feel like working out very much these days...and I hate working out alone.

    He hated my trainer at the gym (who was also my boss) so I ended up quitting at the gym and getting a "sit down" office job.

    In the past 5 years I have put on over 40 lbs.

    I don't even want to get back to where I use to be. I would be really happy to get down to 140. (I am currently about 185).

    I am seriously lacking motivation - and I hope I came to the right place.
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    Ok I see 1 pound lost so we much sing

    da da dum dum dum.......another one bites the dust

    da da dum dum dum......another one bites the dust!!!
  • weeble2008
    weeble2008 Posts: 147 Member
    I've only been here a few weeks, but I think you've made a great decision to get back on this site! It has helped me so much. My husband is one that can eat whatever he wants and doesn't gain a ounce. UGH! He is currently off work with a broken hand, so he's not even getting the exercise that he would normally get at work just working, and he's lost weight. :grumble: You can do it. It sounds as if you've done it before, and of course it gets harder the second time around, but that's all it gets is harder. It will never be impossible! Good luck to you! :flowerforyou:
  • loriannhoffman
    loriannhoffman Posts: 10 Member
    Well...that's the bad thing...my husband has become very inactive also - and he is gaining weight (very bad for type 1...or type 2 for that matter diabetes) also.

    He claims he can't exercise because his arthritis is hurting him too much. BUT as a trainer I KNOW that exercise has been know to alieviate arthritic pain...but he thinks he knows everything. :grumble:

    Hopefully...I will lead...and he will follow.
  • debmac63
    debmac63 Posts: 459 Member
    :smile: Welcome to MFP! You have come to the right place if you're looking for help with a lifestyle change. I joined MFP after almost 3 years of trying to lose weight on my own. I did lose 25 pounds and then put 10 of them back on by the time I joined MFP.

    I know it's hard to workout on your own & stay motivated because I'm in the same boat. Because of my husbands work schedule we only have one day off together. So it's all on me to get up and exercise everyday. I think you'll want to eat right and exercise the more pounds that you lose.

    Since I've been here...I have been very religious about logging my food the night before. It let's me know how much cheat room I have for a little piece of cake or candy. I also log my exercise since you're expected to eat those exercise calories...or at least most of them.

    Here are a couple of ideas on extra motivation that have worked for me:

    1.) I'm a visual person so for extra motivation I bought a write on-wipe-off board that I record my exercise on for the month. This way I can just walk by it during the day and it's a reminder of how hard I worked out this week. Helps me keep stuff out of mouth.

    2.) I just bought an HRM around a week ago as a Christmas present to myself to help me maximize my workouts for better results. This has been good motivation too because the watch knows when you work out and when you don't. It will actually tell you good job if you complete your workouts for the week. I want to see "Good Job"!

    The most important thing is that you're here, where everyone helps pick each other up after a bad day. We all understand because we've either been there or are still there trying to lose this weight. Hang in there and do this for you. Support you'll find whenever you need it.
  • Lizjkp
    Lizjkp Posts: 278
    Hi there sounds as though you need to start with a little excercise and a better diet/food and as you will know your body's own feel good hormones will kick in AND WALLA the magic will be back.

    Sorry to have to say this but what a waste of your talent sitting behind a desk, in my opinion you should consider get ting back to what you do best and obviously enjoyed, helping people to become motivated to excercise, lose weight and get healthy.

    Do it for yourself FIRST and your boyfriend/husband will see how much you enjoy what you do and how much happier and healthier you are becoming and support you to continue and in turn help him.

    YOU GO GIRL:tongue: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • frithir
    frithir Posts: 179 Member
    ssiiiggghhhhh.....I truly believe that the one critter that dwells most often in the lalaland of denial is a male diabetic :noway: :grumble: My father (rest him) was an insulin-dependent diabetic and getting him to consistantly adhere to the prescribed eating plan was about like getting a bat to love daylight. Over the years, I have had friends of both sexes that were diabetic and consistantly, it was the males of the bunch that were the most contrary about it all. My honeybabysweetiepiesoulmatebestfriendhubby isn't diabetic but getting HIM to take his beta blockers is difficult enough but his blood pressure meds?!? Sheesh! :noway: :frown: I think it may be a guy thing ~ like it's not manly to have a disease or something :wink:
  • Being in this program has motivated me even more in my diet. I used to be 255lbs. and in an terrible marrige. This is how I used to be in the picture. I've started my diet because I did't want to be like my mother that is still overweight and has been since she was a child. She weighs over 400lbs. She does not have diabetes but my father that weighs alot less then her is after his heart attack about four year ago. I gained weight when I had my first child and then the second and even more on my third. I can't wait until I get back to 130 lbs. If I've made it this far why am I going to quit now. That will take me straight to my mothers clothes if I quit. Or will end me up like my father with diabetes. I have my children that motivate me all the time by tellinkg me how much I have changed in looks and how beautiful I am, and love to show me off to their friends. Think always positive. And cook what you like but in a healthier way. example: ground turkey meatballs with low fat mealted cheese. Yummy!!! My kids love it. And it was not hard changing our pantry or freezer to healthier food. I weigh myself everyday, even though people say that is not good. But it modivates me and lets me know what I did wrong when I gained a couple ounces or lbs. I am now 155 lbs.
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    Hey! Welcome!! :flowerforyou:

    All I can tell you is that it is VERY possible to get control of this. You already have the knowledge as a former personal trainer......it's just about not letting the food control you anymore.

    I started my journey in September of 2007....at 270 lbs!! Talk about daunting! But, I did it! I am now 11 lbs away from my goal. I can hardly believe it sometimes.

    I guess the biggest thing that helped me was not putting too much pressure on myself. I didn't stress out. I slowly made changes and changed my relationship with food. Now I am living a completely different lifestyle and it almost felt effortless simply because I didn't stress myself out. Also, I finally got it through my head that I don't have to deprive myself at all times. I CAN have a nice meal.....and enjoy certain indulgent foods........I just can't do it every day. I can enjoy Thanksgiving.......I just need to get back on track the next day. The every day/normal is what is important. And making THAT healthy will allow you to indulge in treats on occasion!

    I feel more confident than ever that I can keep this up and I SO wish I could take what is in my head and put it into everone's head on MFP because it took my many failed attempts at doing this the wrong way to get to the point I am at. I finally GOT IT! :wink:

    Food just isn't worth it.

    Good luck!!!
    -Tami
  • ChubbyBunny
    ChubbyBunny Posts: 3,523 Member
    Hi! First off, welcome!

    Secondly, it's time for a change of mindset. Just reading through what you posted.... it's time to accept that it really is YOU making the choices (good and bad) here. Sure your spouse can introduce you to bad food and drag his feet about exercise, but it's you that's willing to LET him impact your life for the negative. No offense. When you got together you made a huge assumption about his habits and goals, which I am hoping had very little to do with you actually ending up together.

    Main thing, stop doing things for him. (I know I am a selfish creature, but I accept that.) If he wants to stay broke (like most ailing men) you can't force fix him. You quit your job, which it seems like you loved, because of him. My question is why? What gives him the right to say what you can do? You quit working out with your trainer (consequently your boss) because he had an "issue" with him. Which in reality reeks of jealously, not legitimate reasoning. If you hate working out alone, find a buddy at a gym or get a new trainer....do NOT rely on him for support because he will give you a million excuses. As for cooking, there are soooo many delicious recipes out there incorporating vegetables. My attitude is you can't diss it until you try it.... except brussel sprouts (and technically I've tried them). Cook for YOU... if he doesn't like it....well, he's a grown man and can heat something up in the microwave.

    Sorry to sound so brutal.... but I'm learning that a lot of women end up letting themselves go because they are overly unselfish (which is good in small amounts) but many go YEARS being on the back burner only to realize way down the road that they've had to give up who they are for everyone and everything else! We can support you so much....but ultimately you have to motivate yourself to take action.

    Do this for you, no more excuses from any front. Just do it. If others follow suit, great....if they don't....you may just have to accept that it's THEIR choice to live that way and it will have it's consequences.

    :flowerforyou:
    You can do this.
  • ChubbyBunny
    ChubbyBunny Posts: 3,523 Member

    I started my journey in September of 2007....at 270 lbs!! Talk about daunting! But, I did it! I am now 11 lbs away from my goal. I can hardly believe it sometimes.

    I feel more confident than ever that I can keep this up and I SO wish I could take what is in my head and put it into everone's head on MFP because it took my many failed attempts at doing this the wrong way to get to the point I am at. I finally GOT IT! :wink:

    Food just isn't worth it.

    Good luck!!!
    -Tami

    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! 11 lbs to goal this is amazing! I feel the need to celebrate!
    Wonderful news.... And yes, I would love for you to dump into my head your knowledge and wisdom, Sensei. :laugh:
  • age1389
    age1389 Posts: 1,160 Member
    Hi! First off, welcome!

    Secondly, it's time for a change of mindset. Just reading through what you posted.... it's time to accept that it really is YOU making the choices (good and bad) here. Sure your spouse can introduce you to bad food and drag his feet about exercise, but it's you that's willing to LET him impact your life for the negative. No offense. When you got together you made a huge assumption about his habits and goals, which I am hoping had very little to do with you actually ending up together.

    Main thing, stop doing things for him. (I know I am a selfish creature, but I accept that.) If he wants to stay broke (like most ailing men) you can't force fix him. You quit your job, which it seems like you loved, because of him. My question is why? What gives him the right to say what you can do? You quit working out with your trainer (consequently your boss) because he had an "issue" with him. Which in reality reeks of jealously, not legitimate reasoning. If you hate working out alone, find a buddy at a gym or get a new trainer....do NOT rely on him for support because he will give you a million excuses. As for cooking, there are soooo many delicious recipes out there incorporating vegetables. My attitude is you can't diss it until you try it.... except brussel sprouts (and technically I've tried them). Cook for YOU... if he doesn't like it....well, he's a grown man and can heat something up in the microwave.

    Sorry to sound so brutal.... but I'm learning that a lot of women end up letting themselves go because they are overly unselfish (which is good in small amounts) but many go YEARS being on the back burner only to realize way down the road that they've had to give up who they are for everyone and everything else! We can support you so much....but ultimately you have to motivate yourself to take action.

    Do this for you, no more excuses from any front. Just do it. If others follow suit, great....if they don't....you may just have to accept that it's THEIR choice to live that way and it will have it's consequences.

    :flowerforyou:
    You can do this.



    Well said:drinker: :drinker:

    There's a time when you just have to say to heck with this I'm going to do it for ME! And then do it!!
    You go girl.. You really can do this:flowerforyou:



    -Adrienne:heart:
This discussion has been closed.