Discouraged and hating my body...

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Hi! I just feel so defeated and not in love with my body. I feel very discouraged when I look at myself and just feel emotionally beat up. I need to lose weight, but it is like the harder I try, the worse I feel about myself and the harder it is. I feel my mindset is not in the right place. I just feel "unbeautiful" and unworthy. I want to live in this body and feel good about it when I wake up (in it). Any advice and tips would be lovely. I want to make my years as a 22 year old WORTH it.
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  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
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    Well lets try this. What do you see exactly when you look at the mirror?
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
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    Deactivated account.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
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    SLLRunner wrote: »
    Deactivated account.

    I saw that was a flaw sometimes in the new forums.

  • malibu927
    malibu927 Posts: 17,565 Member
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    SLLRunner wrote: »
    Deactivated account.

    It's a bug (I know, shocking), but she's been posting for a few days with it saying deactivated
  • kgeyser
    kgeyser Posts: 22,505 Member
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    Feeling good about yourself is in your mindset, not your dress size. Losing weight isn't going to fix that, because you'll just find something else about your body that "isn't good enough." Since you know the issue is in your head, go get some counseling and fix your head. Because losing weight isn't going to change your life as much as you think it will, and it's not how much you weigh that makes things in life worthwhile.
  • malibu927
    malibu927 Posts: 17,565 Member
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    Hi! I just feel so defeated and not in love with my body. I feel very discouraged when I look at myself and just feel emotionally beat up. I need to lose weight, but it is like the harder I try, the worse I feel about myself and the harder it is. I feel my mindset is not in the right place. I just feel "unbeautiful" and unworthy. I want to live in this body and feel good about it when I wake up (in it). Any advice and tips would be lovely. I want to make my years as a 22 year old WORTH it.

    We all go through self-image issues at one time or another. I'm eleven years older and it still happens to me. The key is to know that when it starts making you feel like giving up on things, don't let that happen. Talk to someone...even if not a counselor, a trusted friend or relative will help you realize that you can overcome these thoughts and work on yourself both mentally and physically.
  • SSJ_Fitness
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    Thank you for the responses. I am not deactivated, and thank you malibu for letting others know. I don't know why this is happening to me. :smiley: So, when I look in the mirror, I just feel discouraged. I see fat and wide hips, and a pretty face, but that is all. I really want to be beautiful and feel beautiful! I have seen a therapist, but I still feel like I need more guidance.
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,150 Member
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    Weight has nothing to do with being beautiful. Being the best person you can be, working hard and doing the right things make people beautiful. Continue with your therapist.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
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    Try this look at the mirror. Tell yourself that I will do everything I can to lose the fat and my wide hips.

    I don't mean to hijack your thread but say something like this. This is me BTW. When I look in the mirror I see fat. I kind of see muscles not really. I see moobs and this is what I use as my weight loss motivation. I will doing everything possible to lose the fat in my Moobs. I want to see some damn pecs.

    There will be times when you feel down and negative but remember what it is that you want. Then make a plan and follow it.
  • SSJ_Fitness
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    MrM27 wrote: »
    What's you height and weight ?

    Thank you everyone for the comments, I am 5'3" and 128 lbs.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
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    malibu927 wrote: »
    SLLRunner wrote: »
    Deactivated account.

    It's a bug (I know, shocking), but she's been posting for a few days with it saying deactivated

    Oh. Who would've known. I don't pay much attention to a person's posting history. :smiley:
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
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    Thank you for the responses. I am not deactivated, and thank you malibu for letting others know. I don't know why this is happening to me. :smiley: So, when I look in the mirror, I just feel discouraged. I see fat and wide hips, and a pretty face, but that is all. I really want to be beautiful and feel beautiful! I have seen a therapist, but I still feel like I need more guidance.
    Well, I'm glad to hear that. :)

    Love comes from the inside. I'd continue seeing that therapist if I were you.

    Good luck. :smile:
  • WithWhatsLeft
    WithWhatsLeft Posts: 196 Member
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    MrM27 wrote: »
    What's you height and weight ?

    Thank you everyone for the comments, I am 5'3" and 128 lbs.

    My closest friend has a noticeable physical disability; spina bifeda. She's gorgeous and a spitfire but tiny and will be lucky if she's still mobile and not in a wheelchair in 10 years. Yet she gets up every morning at O'God O'Clock and goes to work, and she makes that little body go. Her words.

    THAT is a problem.

    It might seem trite, and it's hard to put yourself there. But once you love someone that struggles with something that will never change no matter what they do, it becomes a little easier to recognize that you are young and strong and healthy.

    Start working out, and be grateful for that strong body that can do that. It actually does help a little. Every time I run or lift weights, I'm thankful that this body might not be perfect, but it can do this. :smile:
  • tuxedord2
    tuxedord2 Posts: 69 Member
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    Yoga! It helps your mind connect to your body (and will help of course in other ways too - i.e strengthening). You will feel beautiful after each session - promise! You can use online or videos but I would suggest joining a studio/class if you can. There is something about being with others in the experience - the room is darker - minds are quieter. It helps you realize that we are all a part of this journey. Life is not a race. It's about being present.

    You are young. Embrace yourself today.
  • hislittlelights
    hislittlelights Posts: 21 Member
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    You have value; we all have value because God created us and He loves us.
  • 21million
    21million Posts: 113 Member
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    You have value; we all have value because God created us and He loves us.

    I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

    You are in control of your body and you have this!
  • hislittlelights
    hislittlelights Posts: 21 Member
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    21million wrote: »
    You have value; we all have value because God created us and He loves us.

    I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

    You are in control of your body and you have this!

    YES! =)
  • LadyLots2Lose
    LadyLots2Lose Posts: 110 Member
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    You already ARE beautiful though, it is often much easier to recognise beauty in others than it is in ourselves.

    Perhaps it would help to re-frame your idea of what beauty is and why you're on this journey. The truth is that one's physical appearance is not the only source of a person's beauty. A pretty face is a great asset but, so is intelligence, compassion, generosity of spirit, character and kindness.

    Magazines have airbrushed beauty into an impossible (and often unhealthy) ideal. This unattainable notion of 'beauty' keeps the big bucks rolling in as we strive for unrealistic goals. Which is self perpetuating as it derails self esteem and sets us up for failure and ultimately right back to the latest quick fix fad going around.

    In my own journey (thus far) I've found it helpful to refocus my efforts on non 'beauty' goals. Instead of aiming for the smaller sized jeans or a lower number on the scales my goal is to be stronger, fitter and healthier than yesterday. It didn't change the reflection in the mirror very quickly. But, taking the focus off getting smaller did change my attitude, confidence, self esteem and the smaller sized jeans followed eventually.
    Hope the strategy works for you too.