How do explain...

Options
Weightwatcher72
Weightwatcher72 Posts: 95 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
How do I explain to my MiL that the diet she's following (slimming world) is very different to the diets I'm following (WW and MFP)? For instance yesterday she cooked us all a wonderful meal and dessert, even a dessert especially for me and her, but it was 13pps or 817 calories in total! But for her was just 3 of her 15 syns

I really don't want to hurt her feelings as she's a wonderful person, whom I really get on well with

Replies

  • Ready2Rock206
    Ready2Rock206 Posts: 9,488 Member
    Options
    What's to explain? Are you wanting to tell her you don't want to eat her food or that she's doing it wrong? Can you just say no thanks to the dessert and move on? Is she forcing you to eat it? How often do you eat there? Is she cooking for you every day or is this just an occasional encounter? You're an adult, you're allowed to say no thanks to the dessert. However if you're planning on telling her she's wrong, I'd probably avoid that conversation if you want to remain friendly with her.
  • missiontofitness
    missiontofitness Posts: 4,074 Member
    Options
    Did she ask for you to explain how both of your eating plans are different?
    If no, no need to figure out how to explain. Just do your own thing, and figure out how to make it work for you.
  • 50sFit
    50sFit Posts: 712 Member
    Options
    missiontofitness wrote: »
    Did she ask for you to explain how both of your eating plans are different?
    If no, no need to figure out how to explain. Just do your own thing, and figure out how to make it work for you.
    ^^^^^
    THIS
    Every so often I bring my own food to a family gathering, because I don't want pigs in a blanket dipped in grease. I do what works for me, and those who might get offended need to just suck it up.
  • Weightwatcher72
    Weightwatcher72 Posts: 95 Member
    Options
    We usually go over once a week, and I eat out of politeness tbh, she thinks WW works similar to SW, so 'points' the meals accordingly, how do I explain they don't work similarly at all?
  • AmigaMaria001
    AmigaMaria001 Posts: 489 Member
    Options
    Uhhh, what's wrong with, No thanks MIL, I am counting calories and this meal/dessert doesn't fit within my deficit today. But thank you for thinking of me.
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,626 Member
    Options
    You don't.

    When she wants your advice, she will ask you for it.

    I get that you want to help her and that's really nice, but she isn't a child. Keep your trap shut. :)
  • libbydoodle11
    libbydoodle11 Posts: 1,351 Member
    Options
    If her food is too pointy for you just kindly say no thank you. She can follow her meal plan and you can follow yours. All good. No explanation is really needed.
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    Options
    BFDeal wrote: »
    Weightwatcher72 wrote: »
    How do I explain to my MiL that the diet she's following (slimming world) is very different to the diets I'm following (WW and MFP)?

    Powerpoint presentation.

    Chuckle
  • ciacyrus29
    ciacyrus29 Posts: 109 Member
    Options
    I think if this person is your friend, being honest is best. If she knows your trying to lose weight and respects that - then she'll respect your honesty. So if the issue is dessert - then you can say, "thanks but I'm full" or "Thanks but that would take me over my points." If it's dinner - then ask if you can prepare your plate - let her know how many points you have left for the day. I use to tell family and friends that all the time. I only have 30 points left - so I can't have dessert or I can't have that steak or whatever. If they are supporting your effort to lose weight they will understand. Avoiding a conversation only delays the inevitable.
    - If your like I am, you feel like you owe this person an explanation. You don't want to hurt their feelings but you don't want to go over program. Just be honest and let them know that looks wonderful but I'm close to the end of my points for today and I just can't. I appreciate everything you did but maybe I could have it for lunch tomorrow. I agree with Ready2Rock206 you are an adult - and you shouldn't have to explain yourself BUT your a loving and sweet person and you're trying to keep from hurting anyone's feelings. Being an adult doesn't mean that you can't be kind and courteous. Just be honest. If they are a good friend they will understand. If they don't then they weren't your friend to begin with. Nothing lost is nothing gained.
  • janiceclark08
    janiceclark08 Posts: 1,341 Member
    Options
    817 calories doesnt sound like any kind of diet dessert. You could always take a small piece and eat a bite or two to try and it wont add up to very much. That is if you want dessert, if not, say your done or full. Oh! or you can say you will bring dessert, then you have control over calories.
  • theflatpick
    theflatpick Posts: 106 Member
    Options
    Ha! This is funny. It is soooo hard to eat at my MiL's. her side of the family is totally centered around food. They sit at the table and discuss each dish for ever. If she is serving you, it isn't "would you like some of this?" or "how much do you want". It is "How many of these can you eat?". I feel she is offended when I cut a pork chop in half and only take that much, and skip the dessert. She then think I think her food is bad... I don't have an answer for you, but I know what you mean.
  • mjterp
    mjterp Posts: 655 Member
    Options
    save points for the end of the week? WW use the weekly discressionary points for that meal that you eat with her?

Categories