Getting judged after the loss

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  • flatlndr
    flatlndr Posts: 713 Member
    gamesandgains wrote: »
    Slightly off topic but when I lost over 100 lbs I had a ton of people ask my what pill or what diet I was on. My reply was always "just eat less and workout". Their faces were priceless. I had one girl sit me down and ask me "alright dude really, we're cool, tell me what you're taking..."

    Yes. I've lost track of the number of people who were disappointed when I told them my "secret" was to eat less and exercise. They all wanted to know what pill or (latest fad) diet I followed. A few didn't believe that it could be done as I stated.

  • bob108819
    bob108819 Posts: 267 Member
    Love this thread, need to go back and read through it all. I've been hearing this non-stop from several people. I've dropped about 30 pounds, been eating healthy and working out like crazy, and what I hear from people is that "I need to stop". I always say the same thing, "Stop what? Stop working out? Stop eating healthy" Then they backpedal and say that I don't need to lose any more weight, so I ask them what my bodyfat % is and what they think I weigh. They usually back off at this point. Truth is, I'm not really trying to lose weight anymore, but I am going to continue logging to keep myself accountable, and I'm going to do my best to eat healthy.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    People don't really don't know what "normal" is. I'm still 35 lbs away from my goal and I've been getting comments like, "Don't lose too much," or "You're already a normal size." But I know the numbers and what's healthy and what I want, so I just don't pay attention.
  • byrned77
    byrned77 Posts: 1
    Congrats! When I lost 20 lbs, I got skinny-shamed, if that's a thing. My co-workers picked on me every chance they got and it pissed me off. Don't listen to them. They're probably just jealous.
  • snowflake930
    snowflake930 Posts: 2,188 Member
    I have lost over 1/2 of my original weight 290#. I got down to 125 (for about 10 days) but have been stable at 130-135 for the past 10 months and at this weight I am mid range for normal for my height. I too am happy, and my doctor is happy also. I have people tell me all the time that I don't need to lose more weight, that I am skinny, which I definitely am not. It bothered me too. As others have said, just don't pay any attention to comments. The fact that you and your doctor are pleased with your success is all that matters. Congratulations!
  • Minnygirl1
    Minnygirl1 Posts: 83 Member
    Someone recently asked me if I was "done yet" with my weight loss. She then said I was thin enough and should stop. (I am 138 pounds at 5'6" right smack dab in the middle of the BMI chart). I looked her right in the eye and said "I weigh 138 pounds, how much do you weigh?" She stopped, blinked a few times and said in a embarrassed voice "I would rather not say." She got the hint. My weight was none of her business. I was friendly and non confrontational about it so we just moved on to another topic. It worked great!!!
  • briaggressive
    briaggressive Posts: 15 Member
    I went through this a few years ago when I lost 50 pounds. My mother suffered from a terrible eating disorder that nearly took her life when she was younger, so when I started losing weight my family panicked thinking I was going through the same thing.

    Just explain to people your motivation and methods :) My family is always at ease when I explain to them that I eat a healthy amount and exercise.

    I think people have trouble with change mostly. If people have always known you when you were heavier, they might be afraid that your weight loss means you are different or that you are going to change. People will get used to the "new you". I'm 5 feet tall, so when I lose 50 lbs it was a massive change. When it first happened, I got comments like " Oh Bri, you are wasting away!" and "Can I feed you?" But people got used to the smaller me.
  • dopeysmelly
    dopeysmelly Posts: 1,390 Member
    I've had a handful of these comments that I'm too skinny, or too bony or whatever. I smile and ignore them, and then forget them (which is why I can't really remember how many I've had). I'm right in the middle of "healthy" BMI, healthy waist circumference, healthy waist/hip ratio, healthy waist/height ratio and my blood pressure has gone down (it was never that high but was borderline). This all for the first time in 10 years.

    I do reassure friends/colleagues that I'm not sick, because they're just being sweet and caring, but other people's opinions on what size/weight I should be, and comparing me to them, are irrelevant to me and I treat them as such, but I would never offend by throwing some smart comment at them unless they started getting aggressive about it, and even then, I would probably just flex my biceps and say "don't forget the muscle along with the skin and bones"..

    Honestly, people get used to the "new" you eventually, even if it can take a while. I've even learned to become more patient of people who do not recognize me AT ALL and therefore ignore me. They'll come around.
  • JeffInJax
    JeffInJax Posts: 232 Member
    You guys are subtle when it comes to other people lol. The females I work with seem genuinely concerned I might be losing too much but are supportive so it does not bother me. Last time I got a negative comment from a guy I work with was him telling me it was pathetic I waste my time logging because we were at lunch and I was putting everything into MFP. Without missing a beat I told him he was welcome to tell me that as soon as he could look down and see something besides his stomach. Never said a word about it since.

    Needless to say, it is normal.
  • Wronkletoad
    Wronkletoad Posts: 368 Member
    take a look at Augustus Gloop from the original movie. If you are old enough to have seen it in the theater or in early-runs on TV, you'll recall how nearly absurdly fat he was.

    Now he looks on the thinner side of humanity...

    Keep on working out, keep on losing until you're happy! then maintain the hell out of it! and rock on! yay!
  • kangaroux92
    kangaroux92 Posts: 188 Member
    ive actually done this before to people, but in my defense i have been around and seen many people with actual eating disorders and you can really tell when they do have one. i was alittle worried about my one friend she was 5"11 and wanted to weight 125 i thought it was alttile drastic, but i knew she eat so i didnt press the issue to much. the problem is that when people actually have an eating disorder they loose weight so quickly one time you see them they look good you give them all sorts of complements, the next there bones are sticking out every ware i know of at least 3 people who literally were all bones when you actually see it your stomach dropped and you feel sick. thats how you know someone really went to far anything else is speculation an or jealousy.
  • kangaroux92
    kangaroux92 Posts: 188 Member
    i would actually like to add if you really have a disorder/ to the point of being unhealthy physically, the opposite happens people will not say anything, they will be really quite, and avoid eye contact.

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