Need your opinion on an AWKWARD situation...

Leberkase
Leberkase Posts: 2
edited March 7 in Chit-Chat
So I'll try to keep this short. I share an apartment with my brother. He's 27 and has a new girlfriend, 18 years (which kinda makes my skin crawl anyway, but that's not the issue...)
Our place is pretty small and recently I've heard them having sex - They were fully aware I was home and within earshot and the whole thing is really uncomfortable for me. I pointed this out to him the other day and tried to be lighthearted about it, but tonight, he took her in to our shared bathroom. I could hear her complaining about the counter being wet on her naked *kitten*, and if I could hear that, you can only guess what else. I find this totally rude. I'm not a prude at all - they can do what they want in their own space, although I'd prefer they keep it down. But to be getting it on in our shared bathroom makes me feel well.. violated. Once again they knew I was home and in earshot. I tried to subtly make my presence known in case they didn't realise... slammed a few doors, creaked the floorboards... nothing. Am I wrong to take offense here? I find it really rude on her behalf and his also, but I'm worried I'm overreacting.

Replies

  • keefmac
    keefmac Posts: 313 Member
    Move out..
  • Leberkase
    Leberkase Posts: 2
    Why should I have to move out though just because hes being an inconsiderate pig.. He can get his own place to bring his floozies over. :disagree:
  • assthetik
    assthetik Posts: 3,639 Member
    edited October 2014
    You are not overreacting. Have a talk with him and ask him how he would like it if you were bringing home a 40 year old and going crazy. Then if he comes to his senses, you guys can make an arrangement where you are out finishing some chores or at work and they can get it on. If he doesnt get why it bothers you, one of you has to move out.
  • Forty6and2
    Forty6and2 Posts: 2,492 Member
    assthetik wrote: »
    You are not overreacting. Have a talk with him and ask him how he would like it if you were bringing home a 40 year old and going crazy. Then if he comes to his senses, you guys can make an arrangement where you are out finishing some chores or at work and they can get it on. If he doesnt get why it bothers you, one of you has to move out.

    ^^ This. I don't think you're overreacting at all, I think it's quite rude too. You need to have a serious talk with him about it and tell him to keep it in his area and keep it down. If you're going to share the space, you should be comfortable in it too.

  • SnuggleSmacks
    SnuggleSmacks Posts: 3,731 Member
    I would have knocked loudly on the bathroom door and said I needed it. Then I would tell him that he needs to clean and disinfect the entire bathroom thoroughly. Getting body fluids all over the place where you brush your teeth is just not OK.
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
    assthetik wrote: »
    You are not overreacting. Have a talk with him and ask him how he would like it if you were bringing home a 40 year old and going crazy. Then if he comes to his senses, you guys can make an arrangement where you are out finishing some chores or at work and they can get it on. If he doesnt get why it bothers you, one of you has to move out.

    why does the girls age have anything to do with it?

    it's rude regardless, she's invading his space and it's noise pollution.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    lol. C'mon, don't c-block blood. You should be happy your brother is gettin' strange. I'm sure he'd be happy for you.
  • dkewatson
    dkewatson Posts: 1,415 Member
    dbmata wrote: »
    lol. C'mon, don't c-block blood. You should be happy your brother is gettin' strange. I'm sure he'd be happy for you.

    This, haha

  • SuninVirgo
    SuninVirgo Posts: 255 Member
    You're not over reacting, it's rude and mentally gross when it's your own sibling. He doesn't respect you, himself or the girlfriend. He needs his own crib.
  • winf
    winf Posts: 764 Member
    You just need to out perform them. Just get it on with you man on the couch while they are trying to watch a movie. They'll get the message eventually.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    That's pretty gross, I agree. I would tattle tale to the parents about that nasty ish.
  • Miss_1999
    Miss_1999 Posts: 747 Member
    edited October 2014
    Ok, if ya'll share a place, I'm assuming that means that you're splitting the bills? Rent, ect? He's got his own room, you've got your own room? You're both adults. What two consenting adults do in the privacy of their own home, is their business. If he wants to have sex with his girlfriend in his bedroom (which, is where I'm assuming it happened the first time), there is absolutely no reason why he shouldn't, and the same goes for you. If you have a boyfriend, there's no reason why you shouldn't have sex with him in your bedroom. This is BOTH your home(s). As far as the bathroom goes, that's a tough one. I honestly see both sides on this. If he is paying half the rent/bills, there's no reason for him to not have access to this bathroom. There's no difference in him having sex in that bathroom/shower, and him taking a shower by himself and masturbating. Probably takes about the same amount of or less time. BUT I would make SURE he cleaned things up.

    On the flip side, if this is the only bathroom in the house, and he's taking it up with his sex time, when there's an available bed, there might be people in the apartment who need to pee- and that's rude. You're paying rent, too, and should be able to pee or shower when you need to. Or hell, have sex with your boyfriend if you want.

    As far as it being out of line, no. Granted, they don't *have* to have loud, toe-curling, screaming like a banshee sex, but telling someone who is paying their share, no, you can't do as you wish in your own home, it doesn't really jive. I'd say the same if he were trying to restrict you from doing something you enjoyed, regardless.
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
    Move out. Seriously. Find a way to live on your own.

    But sympathetically, sex between adults is gonna happen. They are entitled to a sex life. But not on a shared bathroom sink.
  • SherryTeach
    SherryTeach Posts: 2,836 Member
    Noise-cancelling headphones.
  • SwashBlogger
    SwashBlogger Posts: 395 Member
    I have two older brothers and lived with each of them at one time or another back in the day. They are manly men, but they were so private and decent. If anything, I was the trollop. He is a pig and she is just as bad. I don't thing beating around the bush will help...he's already doing that : )
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,881 Member
    edited October 2014
    Every time they start up, crank up some 70's bow-chicka-wow-wow music and start yelling directions like "That's great, just show me a little more cheek..." "Brilliant, but next time, wax a little closer..." "Hold off on that money shot, I need to change filters"

    Trust me, they'll get the message.

    Either that, or next time they go at it in the bathroom, be sitting right outside it with a bowl of popcorn when they come out. Tip them each a dollar.
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