Help! Need advice about seeing old friends...

almostback2me
almostback2me Posts: 2
edited November 2024 in Motivation and Support
I'm new to this site and not sure if this is the right place to post this but I really need some advice.

I'm 20 years old, in my junior year of college, and in March I gained about 30 lbs... I went from 125 to 155 (I'm 5'5). Since then I've lost about 18 lbs, so I'm at 137 right now.

A boy I dated for a long time recently invited me to his fraternity formal... We've been broken up for about a year and I really want to go see him this weekend, but since I've gained this weight I haven't seen ANY of my old friends. It's definitely been lonely, and I'm proud that I've lost 18 lbs, but that's still a 12 lb gain from the last time I saw him. I know I look noticeably heavier.

Would it be better to wait until I've gotten more weight off to see him? Or should I suck it up and pretend like nothings different and try and be confident?

PS- I know this probably sounds like a kind of stupid and trivial concern, but it's all I can think about for the moment and would definitely appreciate honest feedback. Thanks!!

Replies

  • ct320
    ct320 Posts: 89 Member
    Hey deffo go and try be confident, you cant hide away because of a few lbs and its not that many in the grand scale of things. Although I do totally understand the feeling of wanting to hide away with the extra weight I have been yo-yoing for the last 2 years and really gets me down sometimes but suppose we should use these feelings to spur us on to our goals but don't isolate your self it will be counter productive :smile: x
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,333 Member
    If you like him as a friend and don't care about a romantic relationship to continue? Id say go see him. With a few wardrobe tricks you could dress ten pounds slimmer and only look a little bit bigger
    But, If you still have feelings for him, or simply rather he always remember you as the one who got away. I wouldn't see him until you feel good about it.
    I've made the very same decision…to not see someone from my past..because I'd rather it be a mystery and he remember me as i once was… Seeing him again wouldn't change my life..so why?
  • sarahjane135
    sarahjane135 Posts: 40 Member
    I would go. Dresses with princess seams are slimming, no large prints, a spray tan if you can afford it. Relax and enjoy yourself!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    hopefully your friends arent actually this shallow and will be very happy to see someone they missed.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,747 Member
    yoovie wrote: »
    hopefully your friends arent actually this shallow and will be very happy to see someone they missed.

    Agreed. Besides, how do you know that maybe some of them have not experienced the same thing you did with the weight gain? Not that that matters, just reminding you that you are not alone. Lots of people deal with this, obviously.

    I say GO! Enjoy, be confident and don't even think about a few extra pounds. If anyone, friend or not, is rude enough to ask you if you've gained weight, you flash your best smile and say, "No, I haven't. I feel great! Why do you ask?"
  • sllm1
    sllm1 Posts: 2,130 Member
    Find the perfect outfit and no one will notice the 12 pounds except you. Rock it!
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