Let's talk calories

If restricting to 1200 calorie per day leads to hunger and binging, then it won't work for you.

I am 5'4" and have lost 26 pounds (going from 211 to 185) in five months by eating between 1650 - 2100 calories per day. I set my MFP settings to maintenance (refresh every month at my new weight) and my goal is to eat under that as many days in a month as I can (so far 22 days in a month is my average). I give myself permission to eat up to my maintenance calories when I am crazy hungry, for special occassions, and during PMS. Sometimes I go over, but my deficits, most of the time off-set, those days. I am satisfied with the way I am eating, this method has drastically reduced my binge eating, and I am losing a steady 2-4 pounds per month. The more I practice logging and meal planning, the more of a deficit I create, but I rarely eat close to 1200 calories per day. Lately, I've been averaging about 1500-1800 calories per day and mu weight loss has not slowed down yet. I only walk and do some push ups, crunches, squats for my exercise currently. According to TDEE calulators, a lightly active 5'4" woman in her late 30s can maintain a weight of 135 pounds on 1730 calories a day. I think I could eat that way forever, so that is what I strive to do now.

So my thoughts are this
-you are not doomed to 1200/day
-you are not doomed to being obese
-perhaps to just be a bit more moderate in your approach

My diary is open, and you can add me as a friend if you like.

im 5'4" and 199. I'm successfully losing at 1500 even 1600/day sometimes. thats without exercise. (I'm slowly working on incorporating that piece).

I took your stats and plugged them into a TDEE calculator (http://iifym.com/tdee-calculator/). You use about 1900 calories per day if you're sedentary. That means that, without any additional exercise, you could eat anything below that number and lose weight. At 1500 calories you're eating 400 calories less than your body uses so you could expect to lose a little less than a pound a week. That sounds like great progress to me!

My guess is that you went straight to the most aggressive weight loss goal that MFP would set - 2 pounds per week (most people do). If so, you might consider resetting your goals to something like 1 pound per week and see where it sets you. You might be more comfortable following MFP's set-up that way.

If that's your normal diet, I'd say part of the problem with you feeling deprived and hungry all the time is your choice of foods. Where's the protein, fruit and veggies? I'm not saying you have to go to the opposite extreme but a little more balance to your diet will help. Instead of both candy bars and ice cream, pick one and have a reasonable serving. Have fruits, veggies, yogurt, etc for your other snacks. Instead of the cafeteria food, could you pack your own lunches?

i started at 223 lbs, i'm 5'5... started at 1200 calories... no exercise. i was losing pretty quickly, and many of the days, i didn't feel deprived, but some days i did. like i said, i don't exercise, but i am a manager at a large retail store and spend a lot of the day making laps around the store, and moving fixtures, unloading freight, etc... and decided to raise my calorie goal.

i've tried calorie counting here before, and set it at that low calorie goal and ended up getting discouraged and giving up when i fairly regularly went over that goal by a couple hundred calories cause it just wasnt cutting it. i am not knocking the 1200 calorie a day people, i think it can work and you can make choices that leave you feeling full -and- hitting your macros, but its not for everyone, and that's okay. i decided to bump up to 1500. i feel good right about there. some days i eat a little more, some days a little less.. but it seems to be balancing out.

i am five foot 4 and a smidge, and weight 202 pounds, and I eat 1750 cals a day and have lost a stone and a half, yes i go to the gym, but not every day and i eat what i like, just in moderation, its a lifestyle change for me rather than a diet.
~I refuse to be miserable all my life on a small amount of cals, so a sensible amount and walking or something will really help you, my diary is open.... have a look

Sounds like you have a sensible and sustainable plan in place now. Exercise will come as you lose weight. You'll feel better and because of that, you'll feel motivated to do other healthy things. Be patient (hard, I know) because what you are doing WILL give you results. Try to enjoy the process of learning new habits and recipes, dealing with small setbacks, etc, and look at the scale in 30 days. Sometimes no set weight as an expectation can lead to a surprise