Sabotaged

lynniejones
lynniejones Posts: 1,291 Member
edited September 19 in Motivation and Support
*sigh* Does anyone else ever feel like their significant other purposefully tries to sabotage you? I had a follow up check up with the doctor today. In one month I have dropped 10 lbs by healthy choices and some exercise. (Yay me!) Sure, he was happy for me, but...


Tonight I told him I had to buy some chocolate milk for my too skinny son because he has been sick with strep all week and is dropping too much weight. Mr. Man says: "I like chocolate milk with cookies and ice cream and chocolate fudge". And he has talked about candy bars at least twice tonight too. Doesn't he know this stuff is HARD WORK and I have a limited amount of willpower???


Grr.
Vent over.

Replies

  • lynniejones
    lynniejones Posts: 1,291 Member
    *sigh* Does anyone else ever feel like their significant other purposefully tries to sabotage you? I had a follow up check up with the doctor today. In one month I have dropped 10 lbs by healthy choices and some exercise. (Yay me!) Sure, he was happy for me, but...


    Tonight I told him I had to buy some chocolate milk for my too skinny son because he has been sick with strep all week and is dropping too much weight. Mr. Man says: "I like chocolate milk with cookies and ice cream and chocolate fudge". And he has talked about candy bars at least twice tonight too. Doesn't he know this stuff is HARD WORK and I have a limited amount of willpower???


    Grr.
    Vent over.
  • cham1210
    cham1210 Posts: 31
    Understood. My husband will eat a pint of hagen daas right after the "I'm trying to cut back" conversation!
  • songbyrdsweet
    songbyrdsweet Posts: 5,691 Member
    Okay, I'll admit, this is a pet peeve of mine, so I'm about to get brutally honest:

    This is YOUR LIFE. YOUR DECISION. Take responsibility for it and stop expecting others to make it easier on you. They are living their lives how they want. No one is purposely trying to influence you to make you fail. If you prescribe to that mindset, you will feel that way all the time, and it will wear down the people around you who just want to be left alone with their food. You can't look to others for your own strength, so don't look to them when you're feeling weakness either.

    When you're trying to save money, and see someone else spending frivolously, do you say, "That person is just trying to make me spend money." No. It's just a weird phenomenon that happens with dieting because we feel deprived. Believe me, no one likes the 'Food Police.' Take control and you will always have it.
  • michlingle
    michlingle Posts: 797 Member
    I did the sabotage myself tonight...wolfed down tortilla chips at the mexican restaurant, flushed that down with four beers, and ate "vegetarian" enchiladas...like that's any healthier at a mexican place. I feel like a moose. I feel also that I'm getting comfortable....like I'm really close to my goal weight and I'm getting very lax. This sucks. I feel like a cow...but on the upside, I am off until Monday and totally have time to have more quality workouts EVERYDAY. Plus I am doing a 4M race on Thanksgiving...but then there's Thanksgiving. I will need to run more after the race in order to bank some cals for that day ALONE! Ugh...this is getting hard.
  • Mangoaddict
    Mangoaddict Posts: 1,236 Member
    Okay, I'll admit, this is a pet peeve of mine, so I'm about to get brutally honest:

    This is YOUR LIFE. YOUR DECISION. Take responsibility for it and stop expecting others to make it easier on you. They are living their lives how they want. No one is purposely trying to influence you to make you fail. If you prescribe to that mindset, you will feel that way all the time, and it will wear down the people around you who just want to be left alone with their food. You can't look to others for your own strength, so don't look to them when you're feeling weakness either.

    When you're trying to save money, and see someone else spending frivolously, do you say, "That person is just trying to make me spend money." No. It's just a weird phenomenon that happens with dieting because we feel deprived. Believe me, no one likes the 'Food Police.' Take control and you will always have it.

    I respect that. Very nicely said. I couldn't have said it any better.
  • songbyrdsweet
    songbyrdsweet Posts: 5,691 Member
    Okay, I'll admit, this is a pet peeve of mine, so I'm about to get brutally honest:

    This is YOUR LIFE. YOUR DECISION. Take responsibility for it and stop expecting others to make it easier on you. They are living their lives how they want. No one is purposely trying to influence you to make you fail. If you prescribe to that mindset, you will feel that way all the time, and it will wear down the people around you who just want to be left alone with their food. You can't look to others for your own strength, so don't look to them when you're feeling weakness either.

    When you're trying to save money, and see someone else spending frivolously, do you say, "That person is just trying to make me spend money." No. It's just a weird phenomenon that happens with dieting because we feel deprived. Believe me, no one likes the 'Food Police.' Take control and you will always have it.

    I respect that. Very nicely said. I couldn't have said it any better.

    Thank you. I just find it so frustrating when people expect everyone around them to stop eating any tasty looking food. We have to practice more self control than that. Part of this lifestyle is making good choices no matter what's going on around us, and owning every choice we make.
  • amunet07
    amunet07 Posts: 1,245 Member
    My boyfriend does the opposite! lol

    He is 6'2" and eats less than I do and makes healthier choices than I do. I am on a 1200 calorie a day diet and sometimes go under that and he makes me feel like a piglet. I keep trying to get HIM to eat more! :laugh:
  • gnicolecan
    gnicolecan Posts: 293 Member
    This is something I struggled with a lot at first. Then I came to terms with the fact that we are separate people and I have to make the choice that is best for me.

    That being said, I "outlaw" certain things from the house- that is my worst trigger foods. And, I usually vote for healthier restaurants. If he gets donuts to enjoy with the kids, I ask that he keep them on top of the fridge so i dont see them and I'm not as tempted. If he wants to go to Wendy's, I have to find the willpower to make the right choice for me.

    Don't be afraid to to ask for support. Don't be afraid to toughen up and get your results without that support.
    :)
  • lynniejones
    lynniejones Posts: 1,291 Member
    Okay, nevermind, didn't mean peeve you off, and I'll make sure i vent no more..

    and I do not expect him to stop eating.

    He was purposefully teasing, which is cruel. And for the record he just called back and apologized for it.
  • gnicolecan
    gnicolecan Posts: 293 Member
    sorry PS

    Someone on mfp once said that she told her hubby- if you love me, you will tempt me to enjoy some schmex, not chocolate!

    or something like that!
  • j_g4ever
    j_g4ever Posts: 1,925 Member
    Okay, nevermind, didn't mean peeve you off, and I'll make sure i vent no more..

    and I do not expect him to stop eating.

    He was purposefully teasing, which is cruel. And for the record he just called back and apologized for it.

    feel free to vent. It helps us to write it all down. If you want write me a letter personally. :happy:
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