I never really started.... but I'm back... and heavier!

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Okay so its been awhile since I last logged on... a year ago and before that 2 years ago...

Ready for my excuses?

2011 Car Accident - shattered patella and all tendons and cartilage torn in my right knee
2012 Living in a leg cast and then knee brace with very limited range of motion. Going through months of physical therapy and then being released because I wasn't improving. (dumb insurance)
2013 Pretty much have all my range of motion now. Very little strength in my right leg. Completely lost self esteem. Eating everything in sight with no exercise. I try to start up a good health plan but fail within a week. Never losing any weight.
2014 At my heaviest ever. I have all the motivation when I look in the mirror or get naked but yet I don't follow through. I literally hate what I look like. So I cover it up the best way I can and eat to feel better. Which works for the moment until I feel like guck the next morning. Is it possible to have a food hangover? Cause I think I totally had one!

So here I am. A plea for help. I can walk, I cant jog yet... and honestly jogging is bad for your knees so I'm going to avoid it for as long as I can at least until I weigh less so its less stressful on the ol knee. I do have arthritis in my right knee. I can feel the rain before it drops. It sucks. It aches. And it sounds like fireworks every time I take a step. Yummy scar tissue!

As of late, I do watch what I eat most of the time. But I binge eat like no tomorrow. I have a gym membership and whenever I get on a health kick I always go to the elliptical and LOVE it. Getting my *kitten* up and going is the hard part. I have two littles that depend on me 24hrs a day and with their dad working all the time its hard for me to catch a break...or an uninterrupted shower.

I am full of excuses. I am motivated. I am stubborn. I am considered almost obese for my height. I am so sick of being unhappy with myself. I AM READY.

I would love to be inspired by other people's stories... I look forward to just reading how everyone overcomes and works through their own struggles.

Take care!

-Hilly

Replies

  • thegreatcanook
    thegreatcanook Posts: 2,419 Member
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    I lost my first 40 lbs by just walking and eating right. If you need some support you can add me.
  • aftonmorris
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    I broke my hip in three places 8 years ago and my tailbone and crushed a few bones in my right ankle. I feel so much for your struggle. I have joined a gym and do water walking and aerobics which is doing wonders for my stamina. Just take it slow, work with you r doctor, and be kind to yourself. Friend me and we can chat more :-)
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,139 Member
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    going to be blunt here..none of those problems would prevent you from eating LESS. YOu do not need to move around to lose weight, you just need to eat less then you burn …calorie deficit is always the way.

    get a food scale
    weigh/log/measure everything
    realize that there are no bad foods, and you can what you like in a deficit..
    when you are able start to move around more..
    repeat until you get desired results..

    ^ you can do this ANYTIME regardless of injury
  • BlackStarlight
    BlackStarlight Posts: 554 Member
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    You can do this. Most of us have had excuses at some point in our lives. I'm currently dealing with a relapse of my neuroloical disorder. I agree with ndj though. You can do a calorie deficit and when your strong enough add in exercise :-)
    You can do this feel free to add me any time xx
  • opalsqueak007
    opalsqueak007 Posts: 433 Member
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    You can do it. Once you commit yourself, you will already feel better about things - it's the inaction that causes unhappiness.

    I am 51 and started losing weight earlier this year. I was clinically obese at 194lb and I had chronic back pain, arthritis in both knees, foot pain and arthritis in my hands. Apart from my daily life and my heavy physical job, I did no planned exercise during my weight loss. I feel so much better and so will you. My advice is to concentrate on recording your food intake accurately.

    103dtx2x76br.jpg


  • HillyJean1988
    HillyJean1988 Posts: 6 Member
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    Thanks for being so honest! But now I feel the need to be blunt... I know all of that! I literally know how to eat and when to eat and how much to eat. Seriously I should be in the best shape with how much knowledge I have on weight loss. After I had my kids I did two workouts a day and ate clean. So simple! I lost all my baby weight and them some. Its just that now I am so discouraged with how much this injury has effected my life and well being. Its so hard for me to do that. I am so afraid of failing that I don't really want to start.

    But! I am here. And have been reading success stories and it is so motivating! I am looking for that spark to set me off. I'm almost there. I can feel it.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,139 Member
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    Thanks for being so honest! But now I feel the need to be blunt... I know all of that! I literally know how to eat and when to eat and how much to eat. Seriously I should be in the best shape with how much knowledge I have on weight loss. After I had my kids I did two workouts a day and ate clean. So simple! I lost all my baby weight and them some. Its just that now I am so discouraged with how much this injury has effected my life and well being. Its so hard for me to do that. I am so afraid of failing that I don't really want to start.

    But! I am here. And have been reading success stories and it is so motivating! I am looking for that spark to set me off. I'm almost there. I can feel it.

    well, you are the only person that can help yourself..if you know how to do it, then do it..

    oh, and eating clean is not a requirement for weight loss.
  • HillyJean1988
    HillyJean1988 Posts: 6 Member
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    I'm not looking for negativity here. If it was that easy I would have done that already. That's why I'm here looking for support. Because its so easy to fall back into the bad habits I've created over the past 3 years. Yes it's my fault I let my injury get the better of me. I let it consume me. It was a very hard and emotional time. Have you ever been unable to walk while taking care of two boys under the age of 4? It was emotionally draining. So don't just tell me to do it. I have tried. Clearly I've failed. Now I'm looking for support from people who have been through something like me. And it looks like I have and they seem wonderful! So please please don't be negative here. I'm just looking for support. Not someone to be blunt and condescending. And if I by some chance misread your words I apologize. I'm just so ready to be drama free. Take care! ☺
  • HillyJean1988
    HillyJean1988 Posts: 6 Member
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    You can do it. Once you commit yourself, you will already feel better about things - it's the inaction that causes unhappiness.

    I am 51 and started losing weight earlier this year. I was clinically obese at 194lb and I had chronic back pain, arthritis in both knees, foot pain and arthritis in my hands. Apart from my daily life and my heavy physical job, I did no planned exercise during my weight loss. I feel so much better and so will you. My advice is to concentrate on recording your food intake accurately.

    103dtx2x76br.jpg

    You look amazing!! Very inspirational! ❤
  • HillyJean1988
    HillyJean1988 Posts: 6 Member
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    I broke my hip in three places 8 years ago and my tailbone and crushed a few bones in my right ankle. I feel so much for your struggle. I have joined a gym and do water walking and aerobics which is doing wonders for my stamina. Just take it slow, work with you r doctor, and be kind to yourself. Friend me and we can chat more :-)
    Oh my goodness girl! You have been thru it all! And here you are still going! I need you in my life! Haha!
  • HillyJean1988
    HillyJean1988 Posts: 6 Member
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    I lost my first 40 lbs by just walking and eating right. If you need some support you can add me.

    Yes please!! ❤❤
  • RoseyDgirl
    RoseyDgirl Posts: 306 Member
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    Dont think about doing it all at once, small steps can lead to bigger ones. Right now, commit to 2 workouts a week. And being faithful to your food log. Do that for the next month, and then commit to the calorie plan., and maybe add in another day of some activity. Eventually, you will get it all together. Small steps with every day food logging so that you set up a routine and commitment. You can do it.
  • Edie30
    Edie30 Posts: 216
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    Yea it's hard right! Something just kicks in at some point and you realise you've just had enough. I reckon planning is the key. Do you like lists? Write lists for food etc, plan like mad. Do the calorie thing first then start adding in some easy exercise. You can do it :-)
  • TossaBeanBag
    TossaBeanBag Posts: 458 Member
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    The best source of luck is hard work.
  • heybales
    heybales Posts: 18,842 Member
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    Set realistic goals there is no question that you can succeed in.

    Keep it simple, if current eating level that does NOT cause binges is maintaining weight, then find 250 real calories to leave out daily. Don't even have to log your food that way.
    Don't go slashing foods you enjoy or cutting calorie levels to 1/2 what they used to be - not realistic, and will likely make you binge.

    Then find an average of 250 calories of extra activity you can do daily, just walk for that matter. 3 x weekly long enough to avg 250 daily, or whatever works out.

    That will cause 1 lb weekly loss for awhile. But then eventually you'll have to cut more food out. And the walking will have to be either faster or longer to still burn 250.

    But by that point, you've already been good at small changes.

    Maybe all you have to do is stop drinking some sugar soda daily, or no fries with a burger, or no bag of chips after dinner. Something everything day you can leave out.

    And put your motivation out where you can plainly see it. Playing with the kids down the road? Write it out, or a picture of it on the fridge you see all the time.

    After I broke my ankle in 3 places, and was looking forward to at least 3 months recovery to even walk again, I got back to some workouts after 2 weeks. Walking with crutches between lifting machines at the gym. I could do all but the pushing with foot, so calves got weak, but glutes/hams and up all got a great workout.
    As soon as scars healed enough to swim, crutches to the pool.
    As soon as boot range of motion was loosened up enough to pedal and was allowed 20 lbs pressure, on to the spin bike sitting the whole time. Actually, I did a few 1 legged classes first.

    If you are wanting something bad enough, you will find away. It's being realistic, not be discouraged about what you can't do, but figuring out what you can do.

    Like your comment on running - who says that is needed for weight loss. You'd do better doing strength training anyway.
  • HealthWoke0ish
    HealthWoke0ish Posts: 2,078 Member
    edited November 2014
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    In 2007, I was working out with my younger brother, studying/practicing football fundamentals. He was playing linebacker and I was playing running back. I ran a drag route, caught the ball, stiff-armed my brother, and then turned and accelerated to spring toward the end-zone (that taught him to play soft coverage on me over the middle:) Four or five steps after the stiff-arm and subsequent acceleration, I heard a loud "snap" and felt immediate pain in my left leg.

    I thought Mike had dived at my leg, but when I turned around to yell at him, I saw he was not near me and had, instead of diving, taken an angle to cut me off on my path toward the end zone. Puzzled, I turned...hopped a few times toward the end zone, and then lay myself down on the ground and started feeling my ankle area with my hands to confirm the source of the pain. Having been around football for years, I knew about Achilles ruptures and I feared that that's what had happened to me. Eventually, I would find out, confirmed by doctors, that it was indeed a complete rupture of the Achilles and that I had a long road ahead of me in terms of recovery.


    Recovery had a number of setbacks. For various reasons, surgery was delayed. When I finally had surgery, the docs had to remove tendons from my toes to strengthen and give blood flow to the Achilles. The wound opened up at one point and I contracted a staph infection. I wore a pic line for almost six months.
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    The wound failed to re-close on its own and I had a number of subsquent surgeries...ultimately turning to a plastic surgeon for help...before the wound closed and I could begin to heal. My muscles atrophied enough, and some were lost during the time between the injury and surgery, that my left leg will always be a little smaller than my right (my brothers call it my "spare tire leg"). I ended up not walking at all for almost a year and then, when I started walking again, I had to wear a heeled-support and use a cane.

    By the end of 2009, I could walk again with some proficiency, if with some limping. I had to wear good shoes since some toe tendons had been removed thus rendering the toes less-than-helpful with walking/retaining balance/etc. By the end of 2010, I could walk without a noticeable limp (though at the end of a long day, my leg/foot was certainly tired and would often cramp up). In 2011, my leg/foot had regained sufficient strength that I'd go for long walks without too much pain.

    In 2012, I did my first 5k (I kind of shuffled/walked the whole thing and I was SUPER sore for almost a week afterward). 4f855b48-578a-4f24-842b-614e4ef73af8.jpg


    Last year, I started doing cardio (30 Day Shred, etc.) (previously, I'd been unable to withstand much, if any, exercise that had much impact...but at this point, I was able to do it.) Eventually, I ran a 5k, was surprised at how well I did, and then decided that it was time I started running again. I've been running consistently since then and plan to continue.

    In September 2013, I ran a Half Marathon. I finished in 02:09:47 (just under my ten-minute-mile goal. 71281332-c16c-4ec7-a481-a7ceede6bf92.jpg
    Later that night, while reflecting on the race, I got emotional because the run signaled to me that my "recovery journey" was over. I of course intend to keep running, so THAT's not "over"...but I feel like I've finally "caught up" to where I ought to be, and now I can just focus on becoming a fit person instead of trying to just become a functioning one.bf2186ea-3abe-4749-9995-09a380d487dc.jpg


    Anyway, I guess if there's a point, it's that the "comeback" takes a while. Good luck to you! You can do it!

    #goteammfp
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
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    I snapped the ligaments in my lumber spine in a car accident...had my ACL replaced (w/patellar tendon) and spent 2 years limping from a misplaced screw...probably have no labrum left in my right shoulder...

    So...DVDs (or online workouts) at home - you can get your heart rate up nice and high without leaving the house. Saves time, you never have to worry about how you look, and you can feel comfortable progressing at your own rate.

    Re: the scar tissue, attack that as much as you can stand. I'm 10 years out on that one and just now am almost able to do a full squat. I just put my brace on and keep trying. My biggest NSV was going from a spendy fancy brace to a cheap sleeve!!

    Cliché: Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

    At the same time, you know how to be safe from all that PT. Be safe! :)
  • LifeofJanine
    LifeofJanine Posts: 9 Member
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    All I can tell you is that I force myself to stick with it for a few days and I see a drop on the scale. Even a little drop is enough to motivate me to keep going.

    Make a deal with yourself to stick to your calorie goal for a week. No cheating. I'll bet you money that you'll see good results.

    When you're ready to get out and move, start by walking but then you might want to look at Jeff Galloway's Run/Walk/Run program. It's much gentler on the body, but still pushes you to a good workout.

    Good luck!
  • arrrrjt
    arrrrjt Posts: 245 Member
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    neenee702 wrote: »
    Make a deal with yourself to stick to your calorie goal for a week. No cheating. I'll bet you money that you'll see good results.

    I'll add to this - a REALISTIC calorie goal!

    @jzalisa - Congratulations! I know a lot of people go through pretty rough football injuries and know how tough that can be.