Re-Gaining Most of the Weight

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Hi everyone! I haven't posted here in a while but figured I could use some support, mainly from those who have gained back a large portion of the weight they have lost. I am looking mostly just for encouragement or to hear from people who have had success after their setback.

Earlier this year I lost 50 pounds in only a few months. I lost the first 40 just counting calories, but then decided to join the gym and lost 10 more. I ate at my calorie goal every single day and was extremely motivated. Then I ended up moving across the country, leaving my great job, my friends and family, etc and my routine just stopped. I don't have excuses but it is what it is. I moved in June and since then have gained 25 back. It's very devastating to me. I have tried counting calories again and do perfect during the week but give in to my cravings on the weekend so I don't see any loss.

It's really hard to almost be at your goal weight and to start back from square one. I worked really hard to control my cravings and my appetite (I'm someone who will literally eat all day just because food is there) and I feel like all that progress is shot, too. Once I lost that control its been really hard to get back.

I know that I can't rely on anyone to give me that motivation back or lose the weight for me; I know it's 100% in my hands. I'm just starting to feel hopeless and like I will never lose this weight. So if anyone has a story to share or some advice, I would greatly appreciate it!

Replies

  • beakers33
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    I had the same issue! I was almost at goal in 2011. I only has 5-10 lbs left and then I stopped. I was happy about myself for the first time in years. However, I slowly over the years gained it all back. I am now working on getting to that feeling I felt 3 years ago. I know we both need to motivate ourselves, but maybe we can help each other along the way :-) If you would like to be friends, I have all ready sent a friend request :-) If not, that's ok and good luck! You did it before, so I know you can do it again! Just take it a day at a time :-)
  • Sweetvirgo63
    Sweetvirgo63 Posts: 119 Member
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    First important thing is that you recognized where you're at; you've gone through major changes in your life that totally disrupted your routine and your personal life.

    Shake off the past and start fresh; don't see it as being back at square 1 but at the beginning of a new journey. I gained weight back when I sustained a glute injury about 4 years ago that affected even everyday walking. Once my injury was completely healed, I simply picked up myself where I was at and went on to lose most of the weight by eating healthier and keeping active. Although my membership wasn't renewed at the gym last month, I've been able to continue losing weight by taking 2.5+ mile walks 5-6 times a week and using the hand weights I have at home for strength workouts.

    Keep your chin up. You can do it. And, don't hesitate to add me as a friend for continued support.
  • gabbo34
    gabbo34 Posts: 289 Member
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    The good news is you know the path and know you can do it.

    The hard part is just recommiting to 'redo' all the work you've done. About 10 years ago I went hard on a low carb kick and lost a ton of weight (actually a bit too much). Over time my old eating habits returned and I gained all the weight back and then some.

    Several times I tried and failed to lose it again. I think part of it was the mindset of thinking 'how far' I had to go rather than taking it a day/week/month at a time like I did the first time. You can absolutely do it...the hardest part will be those first few weeks when you go back to eating clean. But once the scale starts to move, you'll get your second wind. You've done it before, you can do it again! :)

  • 007Missinginaction
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    I'm struggling with this right now. I've done really with counting calories and exercising, but recently I hit a tableau and started gaining back what I'd lost. I want to get back on the horse, but it seems like there's no way I can keep this up forever, and then I'll be right back where I was.
    How can one change their lifestyle for good?
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    First of all, don't try to be "perfect". No one is perfect and as you can see, that is causing your weekend cravings. Find balance instead.
    Second, a cross-country move and leaving all that is familiar behind will throw ANYONE off! Give yourself time to adjust.
    Can I ask, why the huge move? Do you have a job there now? Or do you have lots of free time? Either way, I'd say use the same habits that helped you lose weight the first time and build them into your "new" life. Good luck!
  • dclark566
    dclark566 Posts: 330 Member
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    I agree with gabbo34 ..you did it, you know the path, you know you can do it. All about that first step and committing. Best of luck to you. Remember it is a journey!
  • sljohnson1207
    sljohnson1207 Posts: 818 Member
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    I may be wrong, but I sense some loneliness in your post. Could you look into Meetups with like minded folks in your new area? Maybe a walking group, if that is what you like to do? Or anything really? Just meet new people and try to find some on similar journeys. And you'll be getting out and possibly learning about new things to do from others that you will really like.

    I have regained before, and the first thing it took was forgiving myself. Then, I just decided to go for it, and I'm still going.

    good luck to you! I hope you reach ALL of your goals.
  • bbrat333
    bbrat333 Posts: 158 Member
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    Yup, I lost 70 lbs over several months about 2 years ago watching calories and exercise on MFP. I Got pregnant and totally stopped. After having baby I was up like 35 lbs. And kept gaining until I realized I was 5 lbs from my old start weight. Now I'm back and committed to doing it again. At least this time I know I can do it, and I don't have the self doubt I started with before. Even if I have to start over several times, each time will hopefully put a few good habits into my head to make it easier for the next time.
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,626 Member
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    Moving is hard. Packing up and leaving everyone you know and love...it's a little overwhelming. For me, it didn't really kick in until after I'd done it, lol.

    Try something different this time. Don't just adjust portions and cut calories. Work on becoming a healthier you! If you work on becoming healthy, weight loss just follows. Eat healthy foods and exercise. http://www.fitness.gov/eat-healthy/how-to-eat-healthy/

    If you start learning about being healthy and making yourself healthy, it can become a new hobby. Healthier you in you new life.

    Or not. Whatever works for you! Just a suggestion. :)
  • Juju1970
    Juju1970 Posts: 25 Member
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    80% of people who lose weight gain it back. Christy Ally, Oprah, Janet Jackson...They all lost weight and found it back on and they have dieticians, trainers and money. It's just a struggle and sometimes you make it, sometimes you don't. I lost and gained the same 50 pounds at least 10 times. This time I hope to be one of the 20% who keeps it off. If we don't, that doesn't make us losers or anything, it just makes us normal. We get back up, dust ourselves off and try again.
  • Phaedra2014
    Phaedra2014 Posts: 1,254 Member
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    You know my only motivation it that I just can't go back to where I was. It totally sucked. I really don't want to go back there.
  • LeenaJean
    LeenaJean Posts: 276 Member
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    I lost 65 lbs then between a miscarriage/grieving, another pregnancy (I now have a beautiful 1 yr old boy) and being diagnosed with hypothyroidism in my 3rd trimester I gained 75 lbs. I have been back at it for 4 months and am down almost 30 lbs. You can do it! I know it's hard re-doing it but you can't think like that, just stay focused on what you are achieving little by little.
  • DeWoSa
    DeWoSa Posts: 496 Member
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    I lost 70 pounds about 8 years ago, and have gained about 40 of it back. I was really fit, then I had six surgeries in five years. I can't run, swim, or bike any more, and I have moved three times to totally new towns with no family or friends. Every detail of my life is different than it was 8 years ago. I was really really sad about gaining the weigh back, but I see that since my life went through massive changes, I have to build new skills to deal with my new life.

    What worked for me 8 years ago won't work for me now, so I am trying something new. I've never counted calories before and MFP just made sense to me, and I've lost 11 pounds in 55 days.

    I guess the point I'm trying to make is that a new life = new set of skills. Maybe in addition to MFP, you can join a gym or a yoga class or get the Wii Fit or something you've never tried before.

    Also, in your post you mentioned that you are the type of person who will eat all day because food is there -- I highly recommend checking out Overeaters Anonymous and see if it is right for you.
  • silentKayak
    silentKayak Posts: 658 Member
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    Welcome back. Here's the glass-half-full perspective - you did NOT gain "most" of it back. You gained some of it back, but you're still better off than when you started. Besides being at a lower weight than your start point (unlike most regainers!), you also have learned what does and doesn't work for you, and you're facing up to your issues.

    This is a long-term process. You're back now, and that's what matters. You got this.
  • PokeyBug
    PokeyBug Posts: 482 Member
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    A couple years ago, I had my last baby, finished breastfeeding and could FINALLY diet. Using a combination of diet and exercise, I got down to 127 pounds, almost to my goal of 125. And I relaxed. I stopped worrying about what I was eating, and I started stuffing my face with crappy food (yummy, yummy food with zero nutritional value). I didn't fret as my weight crept back up. I hit 130, 135, 140, 145 and then stopped weighing myself altogether, because it was depressing.

    Then, one day, I realized I had nothing to wear that actually fit me, and I knew something had to give. So, I pulled out the scale. I weighed 159. I have never been so fat without some sort of childbearing involved in my life. I knew I had to take control of my eating. It felt desperate. I tried really hard to track my calories on paper, but my notebook just ended up becoming a scribbled mess, so I did some searching around, found MFP, and it has really helped me figure out my plan of attack with minimal effort AND has provided me with a small support network.

    If you want, feel free to add me as a MFP friend. It really helps to keep me on track, to have people to whom I feel a bit of accountability.
  • MelanieMamaof5
    MelanieMamaof5 Posts: 75 Member
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    This has happened to me several times. I have 5 kids. Each time I get pregnant, I gain weight, of course, (with some kids a lot more than others) and each time I have committed myself to getting back to my goal weight (the weight I was when I got married). Coming from a family rampant with obesity (6 out of 9 of my parents/siblings are obese), it's my way of keeping myself in check with my health. It takes a lot of work...and a lot of time...but it's a worthy goal. Unfortunately, sometimes it's much easier said than done.

    After baby #4 I worked my tail off and got down to 1lb above my goal weight but never actually reached it (never saw "that number" on the scale). I got an injury, got busy (as you can imagine with 4 little boys) and got sidetracked. Over the course of several months I put back on almost all of the weight I had spent the first year of his life working off. When he was 2.5 years old, something clicked in my head/life/etc (the stars aligned...I joke) and I was ready to kick my butt back into gear. I got back into calorie counting, tracked my exercise, etc. and eventually I made it back to my goal weight. Then I got pregnant with baby #5. Sigh.....

    With baby #5 I put on a TON more weight than I had ever before (maybe it was the female hormones...he he). Right after she was born I was very overwhelmed...I had never had so much work to do/weight to take off. It been really hard to stay motivated but I've just kept at it. I got the first 10 lbs off within a few months of her birth but then kept putting on and taking off the next 5-7 lbs over and over again. I was totally in a funk (doing really great on the weekdays and super crappy weekends...just as you say).

    Then...at the end of September (of this year), something "clicked" (aka the stars aligned....ha ha ha), and I was SO READY to take on this excess weight once and for all. I've been busting my butt exercising and counting calories again. That was 1.5 months ago and I am only 5 lbs away from my goal weight.

    My point is this...sometimes, no matter how much we want it we just aren't ready to do what it takes (mentally, physically and/or emotionally). I'm not saying you should give up. No way......NEVER....but I do think you should be patient with yourself. You have just made a HUGE LIFE CHANGE. That's HARD. Give it time. Remember that the only failure comes from quitting altogether.

    Second, mourning over where you have been wont help your cause, in fact, it could have the opposite effect. Start this new chapter of your weight loss journey fresh. Today! Forget the past. As long as you don't giving up trying (even if you have to start new every day) than you WILL reach your goal eventually. Remember....this journey of health is a LIFELONG one. It's bound to have it's ups and downs just like anything in life does. Keep at it. You are STRONG. One day things WILL "click" into place and you will be UNSTOPPABLE!
  • aloranger7708
    aloranger7708 Posts: 422 Member
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    I may be wrong, but I sense some loneliness in your post. Could you look into Meetups with like minded folks in your new area? Maybe a walking group, if that is what you like to do? Or anything really?
    You are right, I am quite lonely. I moved to a rural town with 700 (!) people and it's so opposite to what I'm accustomed to (I previously lived in a beach town that had a lot to do). I've actually looked into groups like that but there are none! Thankfully my boyfriend is into being healthier, too, so we started walking together since I first posted this :)
  • aloranger7708
    aloranger7708 Posts: 422 Member
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    BZAH10 wrote: »
    First of all, don't try to be "perfect". No one is perfect and as you can see, that is causing your weekend cravings. Find balance instead..... Can I ask, why the huge move? Do you have a job there now? Or do you have lots of free time? Either way, I'd say use the same habits that helped you lose weight the first time and build them into your "new" life. Good luck!
    I try to be "balanced" during the week, like I will eat small pieces of chocolate which does subside my cravings. But my boyfriend and I eat out every Friday and usually Saturday. I'm not eating anything horrible (we usually go to an authentic Mexican restaurant) but I just eat too much!

    I moved to be with my boyfriend. I have struggled to get a job even though I am educated and have experience so I think that's keeping me stressed, too. So yes, I have lots of free time which is hard since I am used to working full time, going to the gym, etc. Its a hard adjustment!
  • aloranger7708
    aloranger7708 Posts: 422 Member
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    Kalikel wrote: »
    Moving is hard. Packing up and leaving everyone you know and love...it's a little overwhelming. For me, it didn't really kick in until after I'd done it, lol.

    Try something different this time. Don't just adjust portions and cut calories. Work on becoming a healthier you! If you work on becoming healthy, weight loss just follows. Eat healthy foods and exercise. http://www.fitness.gov/eat-healthy/how-to-eat-healthy/

    If you start learning about being healthy and making yourself healthy, it can become a new hobby. Healthier you in you new life.

    Or not. Whatever works for you! Just a suggestion. :)

    Thank you for the suggestions and the link! I am reading through it now and find it helpful :smile: and you're right, I didn't realize how hard it would be until I was actually here!

    And thank you to everyone else too for your stories, they really motivated me. Since I first posted this I began counting calories again and have tried staying focused, and so far have lost 3 pounds (it might be water weight but I still feel excited to be moving in the right direction!)