Back again, again...

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mjvasko1
mjvasko1 Posts: 16 Member
Hello myfitnesspal people.

I don't know why I keep leaving, or why I lose the motivation... but I do...

I used mfp about 3 years ago, lost 70 lbs, got hurt, gave it up, gained it back...

I came back about a year ago, lost another 50, gained another excuse, gained it back and more.

Now, here I sit, sadly at 316 pounds. The heaviest I've ever been. I'm back on p90x. I need to stay motivated but I don't know how.

I'm worried that I'm going to lose my drive to keep going after a few weeks. But I don't want to do that. Why? I'm worried I might die. And I don't want my three kids to grow up without a dad.

I don't know if it's the lifestyle change that's the hardest, but I need friends who will help me get to my goal of 199 pounds. I'd go with 200, but I'd really love to see a 1 on the scale. I want to keep at this forever. I want to be the healthier me that I know I can be....

They say the third time's a charm. Here's hoping.

Replies

  • sheliajim
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    You have lost weight in the past, so you know you can do it. If you make slow changes and not big radical changes all at once, it will be easier to ease into. Looking at your beautiful children should give you all the motivation you need to do this. I'm back trying again too, so hopefully we can encourage one another. I believe you can do it.
  • beachgod
    beachgod Posts: 567 Member
    edited December 2014
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    I just re-started here again on Thanksgiving after a wardrobe malfuntion at work on Tuesday (zipper busted). I'd just changed my profile to mention gaining and losing so what timing to see this thread. You mentioned some great motivation with your kids. Do it for yourself to be able to stick around for them!
    I stopped working out and paying attention to diet last April/May when I hurt myself at the gym. My belly and moobs keep getting bigger and it doesn't look good on me.
    Best of luck to both of us (even though luck has nothing to do with it), friend request sent.
  • CountryGal83
    CountryGal83 Posts: 640 Member
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    I'm back again as well!! I'm at the heaviest I have ever been! I also lose weight, stop, gain it back and then some. No more. If you want support and motivation, feel free to friend request me! We can help each other along!! Best of luck to you on this life changing experience!! :)
  • AshTrixxy
    AshTrixxy Posts: 507 Member
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    I'm always "re-starting". I took a break during thanksgiving this past time. I give up for a week or so and then get back to it for a week or so. Gain everything back just as fast as I lose it. Personally for me, exercise is the answer. If I go for more than 1 day of not exercising, I lose my mojo. It's mental AND physiological. You just have to find your trigger. What's the common denominator that goes along with the excuses? It'll be easier to saddle back up if you know what you're missing! Good luck, friend!!
  • blessedmee
    blessedmee Posts: 2 Member
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    I am also at the heaviest I've been. Living alone and binge eating every night is not conducive to losing weight ;) Let's all keep each other accountable. I'm down! Request me and I'll try to be there for you all!
  • nashirad
    nashirad Posts: 2 Member
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    Repeatedly losing motivation and starting/restarting over and over is a common plight of most of us, I think. I lost 30 pounds a couple of years ago after reaching my heaviest weight ever. Now I'm 9 pounds shy of that exact same weight. These past few weeks I've gone from going to the gym in cycles of 6 days a week to no days a week. I know for me that I need to go to the gym to keep eating right. Now, my fiancé and I are planning a trip to Cuba in January and a wedding in a year and I just feel depressed about it all. I feel useless. I know exactly what I need to do and yet...

    Anyway, I just wanted to say that I feel your pain. You are not alone, as these many supportive comments prove.

    Nashira
  • kareneastwood865
    kareneastwood865 Posts: 132 Member
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    You can do this. You can. Accountability and honest tracking here is helping me. I also have connected with a whole bunch of funny people who hold me to this process! I wish you luck. Feel free to add me.
  • GeauxWill
    GeauxWill Posts: 6 Member
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    I am in the exact same boat. I lost 65lb in 2011 only to gain 75 back. I then lost 55 lb in 2013 only to gain 70 back. How quickly did you drop that weight in the past? Both of mine were in a 12 week period in which my company had a "biggest loser". I went balls to the wall and cut out all of the foods I enjoyed and worked out 6 days a week. It was completely unsustainable. I am now trying to find changes I can make that are more sustainable.
  • mforrestall
    mforrestall Posts: 37 Member
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    I'm on this journey as well! I joined MFP a few years ago when my coworkers did a "biggest loser" challenge and lost a fair amount of weight, but like GeauxWill the changes were not sustainable and as soon as the challenge was over I went back to my old habits. I got married in mid-October and was at my heaviest weight ever. It's made me pretty depressed that even my wedding wasn't motivation enough to lose weight. At this point how I feel about myself is starting to really effect my relationship with my husband (he thinks I'm beautiful but I don't) and that's not OK with me. So I'm back, trying a different approach this time; making small changes that I think are sustainable long term, with the plan to re-evaluate my goals every couple months.

    Thank you for starting this thread. It has made me feel a little less down to know there are others who are in similar situations as me. Feel free to add me as a friend :smile:
  • godswill206
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    Welcome back!
  • mjvasko1
    mjvasko1 Posts: 16 Member
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    GeauxWill wrote: »
    I am in the exact same boat. I lost 65lb in 2011 only to gain 75 back. I then lost 55 lb in 2013 only to gain 70 back. How quickly did you drop that weight in the past?

    The 70 I lost took about 10 months. Then I tweaked a shoulder and used it as an excuse to stop.
  • victoriaalice40
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    You are not alone. Add me if you would like, I completely understand!