Has your interest in your spouse and friends changed since losing weight?

fitfreakymom
fitfreakymom Posts: 1,400 Member
edited November 8 in Introduce Yourself
Just a general question out of curiosity.

Replies

  • missiontofitness
    missiontofitness Posts: 4,059 Member
    I don't have a spouse, but I can speak on behalf of friends.

    Personally, no.
    My friends know I've lost a ton of weight (nearly 26lbs now), and sometimes they'll bring it up. I also know that some people in my life want to make better choices, and some people don't at all. I know not everyone wants to do what I am. I don't try to push my changes on anyone, and I still try to accomodate their lifestyles by not restricting myself from a meal out with friends, or making them feel uncomfortable or intimidated with my changes.

    I wouldn't want my life decisions to make anyone feel uncomfortable, and I certainly wouldn't want them to make me see those close to me any different either. Everyone's still the same to me! :)
  • bobbinalong
    bobbinalong Posts: 151 Member
    Some of my friends interest in me has changed, not open to my lifestyle change regarding food and food choices. Everything seems to have to be centered around eating and I choose not to eat, I'll drink and eat according to what I can for the day when we get together and there is generally a comment....
  • karenlwashburn
    karenlwashburn Posts: 123 Member
    I've lost weight over the past year, my husband gained but no lost of interest in my husband. Married 27 years. It would be hard to replace him as he just has that spark. In friends, yes I changed to friends interested in doing, being positive and probably more into looking better, thinner. I had, had friends that were more into bugging people "helper" types but now my focus is more into self improvement types.
  • Danilynn1975
    Danilynn1975 Posts: 294 Member
    I have friends that seemed to like me better heavier. Now that we are similar or slightly smaller they seem to always be "busy", like busy continuously since the first 20 pounds dropped off. The smaller I got the more busy they became.

    I have since made new friends that don't have to be the smallest in the group and are okay with me being me.

    Hubby likes the changes.

  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,149 Member
    No.
  • BWBTrish
    BWBTrish Posts: 2,817 Member
    My husband encouraged and support me all the way. Makes compliment and is the one who insist to buy new clothes etc.
    Not really a change in him or me :smiley:

    But some other people, so called friends, seems to avoid me, for what ever the reason may be.

    And i love the ones that say "you loose easy your weight" Like i dont work for it every day

    But i stepped back from them. Its my life, my body and my health. More important than some who dont like what i am doing, because they are jealous or any other reason.

    And of course i am happy with the friends/familie i have who is very supportive. But that is not a change in them, that is who they really are :)
  • PokeyBug
    PokeyBug Posts: 482 Member
    edited December 2014
    It's weird, but as I first started to lose weight, my husband got interested in losing. He was always VERY supportive, letting me have my separate meals and time for work outs. One day, he came home and said we needed to have a talk. About something serious. I was like, "Oh no. What have I done?" And he confessed that he'd joined MFP. So, we're in this together now. :D

    As for my friends, we're all trying to be healthier right now. Each of us seems to have chosen a different route to get there, but we're all generally accepting of what everyone else is doing. My way works for me, but their way works for them, so there's no judgement.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    edited December 2014
    Honestly nothing is different between my husband and I at all. Everything's been amazing since Day One and is even more amazing now, but not due to weight loss. We have both lost huge amounts of weight, some of it before meeting and some during our relationship and marriage. But I truly think the only thing that's different is we're much more dance-y at random times and hyper.

    With friends, it's harder to say. There are 3-4 women I've known for years who I'd consider mere acquaintances, but they are kind of haters. The ones who cheered me on as I went from morbidly obese to obese, became uncomfortable when I hit overweight, and now make snarky comments since I am at a healthy weight. Mostly they like to speculate about me using a secret magic diet or pills because seriously "they work out a lot and eat Paleo and have not lost a pound since February". LOL Sorry, but I'm actually quoting them.

    My REAL friends are the same as ever. Nothing has changed.

    BUT I do have some newer friends, and I can see a difference in how easy it has become for me to make friendships. I basically "get asked out" in the friendship sense -- by women my age, a lot -- and that didn't used to happen unless I met someone through work.

    I do not have a large family but everyone is still kind of amazed. For reference, I am 38 years old and the last time I wore a size 10 in jeans I was 10 years old, until now. I always weighed over 200 lb from age 15 onward. They don't treat me differently though.
  • Wow, I guess I'm the outlier here, but I'm divorced after losing 60lbs and keeping it off. My ex-husband actually did the opposite, so as I lost weight he gained it. It was a super hard experience - we were married for 8 years after I lost the weight and while I can't say that they weight loss was the ONLY thing that contributed to our demise, it certainly didn't help. We gave it 100% effort and he even started running with me for a while, but it just wasn't him. 4 years post-divorce, I'm still my (smaller) weight and he's still his (larger) weight, so I guess it was meant to be. Still, it is sad, and while I wouldn't trade my happiness for anything, it was a difficult experience.
  • phyllb
    phyllb Posts: 735 Member
    It's is interesting My husband who has always been slim and muscular is happier, my friends no real change. But definitely different responses frm newer acquaintances or work colleagues, mixed in the way you might imagine
  • sweetest_potato
    sweetest_potato Posts: 53 Member
    Hmm.. Well I recovered from anorexia of 4 years so my weight CHANGE (not loss) has definitely made me more likely to stay away from unhealthy friends (those who are unhealthily trying to lose weight.) It made me appreciate my BF more, mostly because he helped me to overcome the illness. If it weren't for him I'm not sure if I'd still be here because I was in the 16BMI range and still losing more weight and harming myself.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    Yeah.

    When I first started a training program, I was out at concerts until the early morning 3 or 4 days a week. I hung out with bands 24/7. I was a die-hard bachelorette who was never going to calm down.

    Fast forward 2 years...

    Im asleep by 9:30/10 pm and up at 4:45 most days, 5:15 the rest. Im at the gym like it's a church Im obsessed with. I cut out 90% of my old friends, don't even have them on facebook anymore.

    I moved into a bigger better apartment.
    I have bada ss friends.
    I do Tough Mudders.
    I have a better job, making 50% more money.
    Ive fallen in love with the science of my own fitness.
    And a wonderful man.

    I don't have time for frivolous living anymore.

    I need my life to stand for something and mean something when it's all said and done.

    I cant live the same year 75 times and call that ish a 'life'.

  • Laurend224
    Laurend224 Posts: 1,748 Member
    edited December 2014
    I've been 140 lbs and at my highest (pregnant) weight, 252. I met my husband when I was slim and gained weight with the babies. I'm now at 205, and the only thing that has changed is how I feel about my body. He loves me no matter what. We've been married for 10 years and together since 2001. <3 And I love his skinny geeky self just as much as ever.
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