About to start on this new journey.

I am so sorry to hear about the difficult times you have been having. It sounds like it is time to pay attention to you now.

My advice to getting started is to start weighing, measuring, and logging everything you eat and drink. Don't worry too much about portions and macronutrients to start, just get into the habit of accurate logging for a couple of weeks. When you see your habits, you can start tweaking. You can see the things you need to cut down on and areas you might have to add more in (veggies and fruits for many of us). You do not have to find an "official" meal plan, but if you need ideas it isn't a bad way to start. Check out things like the diabetic diet, mediterranean diet, etc. Your library should have some good books with info and meal ideas. Don't make anything absolute. As soon as you say "I cannot eat ____", you will start to crave it.

Don't feel like you have to eliminate anything. Over time, you will get a feel for what your body needs. For some, it is lower carbs, for others it is lower protein. There are easy things to do to cut down. If you are a regular soda drinker, try drinking diet and substituting water or seltzer for some of the soda. If you are a snacker, maybe plan on 5-6 meals a day instead of 3 so you have some snacks built in to the plan. Personally, I do 5-6 meals. Others do 1-2 meals. It all works and is very individual.

Common sense is the main thing. If something seems too good to be true, it is. When I first started (one year and 80 lb ago) someone mentioned that you are not making a huge change, you are making a series of small changes. Keep that in mind and work on one small change at a time and you will be successful.

Welcome and good luck!

Sorry about your loss and troubles but congratz on taking care of you and wanting to be healthier. If your just starting my advice would be to log what you normally eat for a few days and then look at the info to see where you can make small changes. If you don't think of it as a diet but as changes you can make for the rest of your life to be healthier its so easy to stick too.

Emotional eating is often the hardest to get under control and requires support and understanding. You'll find that here, so welcome.