Dealing with dinner
purebredpolly
Posts: 318 Member
How do you handle meals when your spouse/adult family are not remotely interesting in eating lower calorie meals?
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Replies
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Make your own. They don't have to eat what you eat. They don't have to agree with what you eat or like it. You're an adult that's made a decision to change.0
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Yup, nothing wrong with having something else.
If you're the one who usually cooks for everyone, you could make changes to the meal so it fits your macros and have things on the table that they could add to the meal. For instance you could make tacos and everyone can make and choose their own toppings. You can make your own too, and it'll probably be pretty easy to log0 -
I do. *grins* I was wondering how you stay on track when you are making tempting foods for the rest of the family.0
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I try to make sure that I really like what I'm eating. And I try not to eat "weirdly" in front of my kids/family. An example might be that I make steak for the family (which is high in calories and I'm not a big fan) and then make myself some shrimp. But we all eat salad and/or the same vegetable and rice. I make sure to measure my rice because I could eat my body weight in rice if left unchecked!0
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If you're the cook, you get to decide what's cooked. If that is objected to, then the objector can cook.0
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I make the same meals for both of us, but weigh and measure my own portions and let him serve himself as much as he wants. He does not have a weight problem and I don't think it would be fair to him for me to expect him to eat "diet type foods" or to have to limit his portions just because I do. He also likes to have desert and even makes pies for himself.
I wish I could eat like him but I know I can't without gaining weight. Its amazing but he seems to know how to not overeat without weighing and measuring the food. I'm glad for him.0 -
You can eat whatever you want. There shouldn't be temptation, you can have cake, pop tarts or what ever your weakness is. Portion control AND staying in a deficit is all that matters in the long run. The majority of your food should be healthy, but you're allowed treats too. It's a lifelong commitment, do you plan on going without "treats" for the rest of your life?0
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Tacos would be easy, thanks for that suggestion. I do the same with soup, the carbs are added separately.
I'm finding it hard for things like when I make beef pot pie in the crust, or a pasta based meal. No one wants the reduced calorie version of those things. How do I deal with the temptation? The very last thing I want is to have my family eat at the table, while I eat on the porch.0 -
I'm the cook, and I have no interest in making two meals. They eat what I make, or they don't eat.
In all seriousness, I've always cooked pretty healthy, now I just make sure I portion and weigh my servings first. My husband eats 3 times what I eat. 0 -
Wow, I missed a bunch of posts.
I just want to know how to sit at the table while they are eating things I will not eat, not even a small portion. It's not that I don't want to eat it, I do.
I'd like to know how one mentally handles the temptation of preparing calorie heavy, fat heavy, salt heavy meals. Is there some trick? Or am I looking at "Suck It Up, Buttercup"?0 -
For something like beef pot pie - I would probably just make sure I knew the cal count and portion for myself so that it fit into my calorie count. And I might skip the crust and just add more veggies in place of that. It's true you can eat anything you want - as long as it fits into your cal deficit at the end of the day. It helps to weigh and log everything that goes into your mouth. let your family eat what they want and enjoy eating with them knowing you have your intake under control. Also calculate the cals BEFORE you eat.0
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I suppose I should say that I am very proficient in gourmet cooking. My family has had this level of cooking from the get go. There is not a soul in this household who thinks light cooking is tasty. So, there will be no changes in cooking for my family. I'd be wasting food.
I will cook two meals, and I will allow them to try my food. But thinking they will change is unrealistic. I was just hoping there would be some mental tips to help me sit at the table and eat my light recipes while I watch my family eat creme brulee, and French sauced fare.0 -
If you are the one doing the work to prepare the meal, they can eat what you serve. If they dont like it, they can make there own meal. That is what a lot of people have said so far on this thread and i agree with it to a certain point. With children, yes. EXACTLY THAT! With your husband though, he works hard to support the family so i understand that he doesnt always want to eat healthy. What i do at home that has worked so far is I just added a few more vegetables into the recipes and portion my plate by weight or per serving. Also if i have had a crap day with eating before supper and i know that i cant eat much more my go to meal is baked fish, some sort of veggie and mashed potatoes or homemade potato wedges. You can eat a ton of it for very few calories. Luckily my husband likes fish
All the best on your journey!!! BTW... how about you dont tell them how many calories a meal is lol. Maybe the thought of calories tastes good to them because then they feel they arent on a diet. 0 -
Thank you all. I appreciate your input on the subject.0
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I both bring home the bacon AND I fry it up in the pan. I say that whoever is doing the grocery shopping and the cooking gets to decide on the meals. In an ideal situation, every family member is contributing time and thought into meal preparation. I do not think that earning power equals greater decision-making.0
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I make the same meals. I do a smaller portion for myself and we might have different sides. Like my husband might have rice and I might have roasted vegetables instead. Usually though it's more like I have one serving of rice and he has two.0
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My husband was resistant to my "going on a diet" because he thought it was gonna be nothing but grilled chicken breasts and salads. He quickly learned that we can still have his faves, like chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes w/gravy, corn, etc. I eat what he eats, only less, with maybe a salad or broccoli to round out my meal.0
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NoelFigart1 wrote: »If you're the cook, you get to decide what's cooked. If that is objected to, then the objector can cook.
Oh this is so true. I make my husband eat what I eat - but I don't always make low calorie dinners. If I eat really well during the day and have the calories to afford it - I make a higher calorie dinner. If you deprive yourself all the time, especially when your family is eating however they choose, you're bound to give in to temptation. It's all definitely a mental thing. Find low calorie dinners that you love even more than high calorie ones and cook those. Or you could try eating your meal before or after your family's - that way you're not directly eating around the 'bad meals'. Basically you just have to find your own way to work around the mentality of wanting the high calorie meals - whatever works for you.
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I make my own meals unless my family plans on eating the same thing I am that night.0
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I think maybe you've got something there Roxi. If I find meal I truly love, I won't be tempted by the meal I've made my family.0 -
They eat what I'm making and if they want something extra, they make it themselves. Sometimes it's lighter and sometimes not so much and I just eat a smaller portion.
I guess I'm lucky that my boyfriend would rather have a fit girlfriend than a gourmet meal every night. Haven't gotten any complaints.
I guess if you have to cook 2 meals because they're unwilling to eat anything healthy, the answer is in fact that you're going to have to "suck it up". Sorry, it seems kind of crappy for you.0 -
I cook for both my BF and me, and it's not like I'm on a diet, just a more healthier eating. Same foods we've always eaten, no drastic healthy changes either... and for me, it's about eating smaller amount of what I've always eaten. I don't have any foods I say NO to. It's all about portion control.
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All that matters is portion size. Use a scale and measuring cups and you should be fine.0
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I just make the same meal and eat less of it. I also sometimes do not tell my boyfriend that what I made is lighter, less fat, etc. He doesn't notice at all.0
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samantha1242 wrote: »I just make the same meal and eat less of it. I also sometimes do not tell my boyfriend that what I made is lighter, less fat, etc. He doesn't notice at all.
I'm the cook in my family, but I often make things that would exceed my calorie limit if I were to eat what most people (or cookbooks) would consider one serving. I just serve myself less, and I eat it slowly.
It's not that hard to take a small serving and then eat at a slow pace. It helps if you're talking to other people at the table, and if you take a drink of water between bites.
Like Roxi, I also tend to eat a light breakfast and lunch, so that I can enjoy myself at dinner (my main meal). I'd estimate that I get at least half my calories after 7 pm. It didn't stop me from losing 65 pounds in two years.
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Are you having a sit down meal with family including children? If so, then I would suggest serving what you plan to eat in serving dishes, that way it looks normal when you dish it out on to your plate. It will look more like your choice and chances are good your children will want to copy and like what mom likes. At least they will try it because they will wonder why mom is choosing that dish rather than the other. Make it as normal as possible, don't explain and let any family member dish it. Don't label it, " Mom's special diet food."
If you are in a house of adults, do what you like. When I realized that dinner was just hubby and me and we weren't very formal about it, usually eating separately and in front of the TV or computer, I decided to eliminate dinner from my daily routine. Now I eat very well for breakfast and lunch, skipping dinner. I usually supplement with a yogurt and banana just before going to bed so that I don't wake up extra hungry.0 -
My best mental tip: remind yourself WHY you want to do this, be it overall health, weight loss, or a fitness goal. And, I keep a picture of me when I was in my best shape on the fridge. I looked and felt so good then, and it is hard to want a creamy pasta dish or pot pie when I see that it is possible to achieve that again. I know some that do this with "fat pics", but that seems negative to me personally. Whatever motivates you...
Also, as a carboholic, I find that I can 50/50 my noodles or rice with steamed veggies. I like broccoli and cauliflower best, but it can be done with carrots and spinach or whatever is in the fridge. If cream sauce is more to your liking, have you seen the "zoodle" kitchen tool? It slices zucchini like pasta, and can be quickly sauteed to tender. No, it isn't pasta, but it will easily shave a 300 calorie count off pasta dinner. With that kind of deficit have any sauce you like!0 -
I will do some searching of recipes, and like I said I will offer along side what they like. If they like it I will start of list of recipes they will eat. Perhaps they won't notice if I find really good recipes. So far that has not been the case, they sniff it out immediately. And that is because it is not the usual gourmet. It's not that hard to figure out.
But this really isn't about them, it's about me. I'm going to seek out recipes that I like as well as the old French standbys I make my family. It's going to take some time, and I just may eat some dinners by my lonesome till I figure out what I really like. I'm not thrilled at the idea of suck it up buttercup, but if I only have to suck it up till I develop a repertoire of outstanding healthy fare, then I can do this.
Again, thank you for you input. It's so nice to have ideas bouncing around from everyone.
Roxi, a big thank you to you. I don't know why it never occurred to me find recipes I actually liked.
For everyone who suggested that I make something, and give them a chance to like it, thank you as well.
I'm not opposed whatsoever to making my family the foods they like to eat. My job is as homemaker, I've done it for 25 years. It is my profession. A profession I take as seriously as those who decide to work outside the home. It has been a hobby of mine to learn French cooking. My family has indulged me all these years, perhaps they will indulge me as enthusiastically in tasting healthy fare.
Warm Regards0 -
Thank you Kelly, good advice.0
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Thank you everyone.0
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