Tough year, trying to learn to treat myself the way I should. Need Friends!

First off, I am not going to get on the scale. It makes me obsessive and crazy. But if I had to guess, honestly, I would probably say I am around 230 lbs (5'5") right now. At the beginning of last year I was around 212. Then my whole life turned into a mess. I had horrendous family issues, got married, am trying to survive on a young <5 year teacher's salary in NYC while my husband is still in grad school, and basically let myself go.

I am sick of putting EVERYTHING above myself and above my health. I need friends who get it and who can hold me accountable.

I have a fitbit and my first goal is to track everything. I am going to eat about 1400 calories a day. I don't want to be winded going up stairs and I want to be able to walk into a store and buy clothing. I try to be a body positive person, and I don't buy the crap that every fat person is unhealthy, but I do have hypertension and PCOS and if I want to have a kid in 5 years (I am 28 now) I personally need to get all of that under control.

Thanks for any support you can lend. I would appreciate it if anyone wanted to add me! I will try to be a good support to you, too.
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Replies

  • complicateme86
    complicateme86 Posts: 20 Member
    Good luck with your journey. Making the decision to lead a healthier life is always the first step and usually the hardest! I'm always looking for more friends to help me stay motivated. My son is 10 months old and I still haven't lost all the baby weight (and then some). My fiance lost his job right before I gave birth and we are still struggling to get back on track so taking care of myself always seems to be the last thing I do. With a new year I'm trying to get back on track. I'm trying to lose at least 20# and get back below my prepregnancy weight. Feel free to add me as a friend. :-)
  • sweet_brownsugr
    sweet_brownsugr Posts: 51 Member
    Our stories are not exactly similar; however, I too am struggling with my weight. I am a working mommy of three who hasn't treated myself very nicely for the last few years. I vowed that this year, I would treat myself better...and be kinder! I'm so used to beating myself up about everything (not doing things well enough, being "fat", not feeling worthy of simple things like manicures or miniature shopping trips, etc.) - I just make sure my family is pampered all the time and put myself on the backburner!

    Now, things are -a- changin'!! Part of taking better care of myself is weight loss. I am very excited to have my hubby on board with me as well (he's great and super supportive). Let's follow each other's journey and motivate each other. We can do this!

    If ever you become discouraged, just think of how great you'll feel in a few weeks/months that you didn't give up!! (That's my current motivation.)

    Add me!
  • scupit
    scupit Posts: 32 Member
    Feel free to add me:) I'm so proud that you are beginning this journey.
  • bookstatic
    bookstatic Posts: 27 Member
    Thanks to all 3 of you! I really appreciate it. It is so hard to start. I know it will be even harder to keep going.
  • shelbikinz
    shelbikinz Posts: 38 Member
    Hi Dana. I'm very proud of all of you! I'm trying to get healthier as well. I'm slightly overweight, but not very fit. Feel free to add me for support. :)
  • shelbikinz
    shelbikinz Posts: 38 Member
    Here's my Fitbit profile. https://www.fitbit.com/user/2CQTGN
  • mils13
    mils13 Posts: 1
    Although I'm a little different I too struggle with weight loss, have pcos, endometriosis and have recently diagnosed with a genetic insulin metabolic disorder. I'm older than you, a teacher, and have no children due in part to this issue. My entire life I've struggled without know ing why. ..2 years ago before this diagnosis I started going to a zumba class. I lost 75 lbs and went from a 22/24 to a 14. Now I'm attacking the metabolic disorder by dropping bread and trying to be the healthiest in my life..i currently fluctuate between 210 and 220. My goal is 185. Add me and go to a supportive doctor who focuses on endocrinology. Millie
  • _runnerbean_
    _runnerbean_ Posts: 640 Member
    Sending you a friend request. I have a fitbit too and find it great for increasing my motivation to exercise. I find that I over-eat if I am stressed or tired. Logging on MFP has helped me to control that somewhat. Good luck.
  • Train4Foodz
    Train4Foodz Posts: 4,298 Member
    Hey there,
    Wishing you the very best of success with your journey! Put 110% in and you'll get the same in return.

    With the support of all the wonderful people above and others all over MFP, you are never without a support network of great friends on your journey.

    You got this!!!!!!!

    All the best!
    Adam
  • bookstatic
    bookstatic Posts: 27 Member
    I could cry I am so happy and overwhelmed with the support. Thank you all!
  • complicateme86
    complicateme86 Posts: 20 Member
    Half the battle is having someone there to support you!! I forgot to mention that I work as a registered dietitian so please feel free to ask me any nutrition questions you can think of! I'm incredibly passionate about food and how changing your eating habits can change your life. :-D
  • bookstatic
    bookstatic Posts: 27 Member
    Half the battle is having someone there to support you!! I forgot to mention that I work as a registered dietitian so please feel free to ask me any nutrition questions you can think of! I'm incredibly passionate about food and how changing your eating habits can change your life. :-D

    Oh that is amazing. I actually am gluten and lactose intolerant (but I tolerate yogurt). One of my major goals is to cut out gluten substitutes (the Udi's bread, the gluten-free corn pasta, etc). My body tends to function better and I lose more weight when my carbs come from veggies and fruits instead of processed starches.

    One thing I am trying to do is bulk up my meals with as many veggies as possible, and have a reasonable amount of protein. Any ideas you have around this -- and other ways to achieve the same thing -- would be SO vastly appreciated!
  • bookstatic
    bookstatic Posts: 27 Member
    So just to get a baseline, I weighed myself - I have decided not to do it again until next month. 223. Not as bad as I thought, but still not where I want to be. Yikes.
  • complicateme86
    complicateme86 Posts: 20 Member
    Other ideas for protein instead of meat are beans, nuts and legumes. Nuts tend to have a higher fat content, however, they are high in monounsaturated fats which are healthy for your heart. Typically what we recommend as dietitians is to make half of your plate fruits and vegetable at every meal, 25% meat or meat substitute and 25% carbohydrates. If you go to www.eatright.org and click under public, there are many great articles about eating this way as well as good vegetable options to add to your diet. I love Whole Foods grocery store because you can find vegetables that other stores will not carry. Feel free to try things you never had before... a good example is kale which is high in iron and vitamin c and super low in calories. You do need some carbohydrate in your diet. The reason for this is because carbs are most easily broken down by your body to give it energy. It requires more energy for your body to break down fats and proteins. However, decreasing your overall carb intake on a daily basis is not a bad idea. The bottom line for carbs is your body needs about 120 grams per day to do basic functions such as breathing and keeping your heart beating. The cool thing about your body is that it can always adjust. I used to skip breakfast as a teenager and was always a zombie at school in the morning. Once I learned how important breakfast is to starting your metabolism off in the morning, I started to eat it. At first I was not hungry and had to force myself to eat something small, however, my body adjusted and any time thereafter that I missed out on breakfast, I found that I was starving. In terms of protein intake, the typical recommendation for a healthy (meaning illness free) individual is 0.8-1.0 grams of protein per kg of body weight. At your current weight of 223# which is 101.4 kg, you would require about 81-101 grams of protein per day. This is just an estimate, and I know MFP has probably calculated something different based on what options you chose when you created your profile but this should help to at least maintain your muscle mass that you currently have. Now that I've rambled on a big, does this help at all?
  • melony78h
    melony78h Posts: 1 Member
    Hi Dana
    This is all new to me the blogging, going to give it a try. Myself is around 220 pounds at 37 and pre-diabetic and single. I have to admit that I don't like myself very much lately . Because when I need to shop for clothes and nothing fits and simple things as in bending over to either paints my toenails or try shoes and climbing stairs are all a chore. I ask myself when did I give up on myself? I blame work a lot because I work 13 hour days a lot during the week. All needs to change I want me back verse getting diabeties! I am going to start investing in a healther me. I know that it is going to be very hard and will also need encouragement!! If anyone has ideas or suggestion to make this easier, please share!
  • Add me
  • bookstatic
    bookstatic Posts: 27 Member
    Now that I've rambled on a big, does this help at all?
    SO much. Thank you! It's hard to sort through what is "ok" and isn't between all of the diet types I've seen.


    melony78h wrote: »
    I know that it is going to be very hard and will also need encouragement!! If anyone has ideas or suggestion to make this easier, please share!

    We can do this together, I hope!

  • Mrsortiz7124
    Mrsortiz7124 Posts: 18 Member
    My story is very similar to yours. I'm 29 years old 5'4 and weigh 231lbs. This last year has been nothing very hard full of family issues and health problems. I am here to offer any support and am too looking for support because I can easily "fall off the wagon", so you can count on me and hopefully me on you too :smile:
  • bookstatic
    bookstatic Posts: 27 Member
    Thanks! I hope we can support each other!
  • I let myself go long ago and now I'm taking my health back! I know that this is going to be a long journey but i am prepared for the ups and downs! Good luck to us all as we go through this journey!
  • doitnow1218
    doitnow1218 Posts: 295 Member
    You can add me as a friend both here and on fitbit //www.fitbit.com/user/327MVG

    I would love to help encourage you and support you on this wonderful journey! Oh...and...btw...I am also a teacher! :)
  • Cinderella_82
    Cinderella_82 Posts: 20 Member
    Hi Dana,
    I wish you all the best for your journey. I know it is hard to reach a goal if you have a lot of private trouble. But I think you are really motivated. You can count on my support.
  • klkudrna
    klkudrna Posts: 18 Member
    Hi Dana!!! I just sent you a request. Feel free to add me and anyone else who sees this. I'm getting back on the MFP wagon and trying hard to log everything good or bad. I Love to share stories and positive motivation!!!!
  • bookstatic
    bookstatic Posts: 27 Member
    Thank you all! I am so excited.
  • paigelyn88
    paigelyn88 Posts: 26 Member
    Feel free to add me as I have had a year that put me back to the beginning and could use and give support!
  • AuntieCeeCee
    AuntieCeeCee Posts: 22 Member
    I'm a working mom with 3 young kids, 2 that have serious health issues. My husband is an emergency department nurse and works nights so I'm left to take care of everything. I was losing weight by going to the gym and making healthy food choices for my whole family but I got burnout. Now I'm always tired and stressed which makes me eat which makes me tired and stressed, etc. I need support and would like to offer support to anybody who needs it. Feel free to add me!
  • jjw62
    jjw62 Posts: 2 Member
    Glad to hear you have decided to devote some time and energy to yourself! I'm getting back into the weight loss and exercise mode and often have a hard time staying focused and motivated amid a very busy work life. Today I looked at a book I've had for a few years, the Beck diet solution, and decided to re-read it and follow some of the suggestions. Its not so much an eating plan as a guide for managing the thinking that drives our eating habits. I'm really good at giving in or rationalizing so can use that kind of reinforcement. I like the book and the concept and am going to use it again. You might want to check into it. I think they have a website too. Good luck.
  • faerieflora
    faerieflora Posts: 2 Member
    Feel free to add me as well! I'm a wife and mother of 1. I weigh more now than I ever did when I was pregnant and my son is 8! It's hard because of course my husband loves me just the way that I "am" and loves to cook. I love to eat and that makes for a very bad combination. :) and because I work a desk job, and then have to come straight home to be with our son, I don't get much in for exercise. So, any help and motivation is greatly appreciated. :) we got this! :)
  • kar328
    kar328 Posts: 4,159 Member
    I'm a bunch of years older, but with similarities. 5'2", started at 248 lbs, now on day 738 of logging, I'm down 82.2 lbs. In 2.2 lbs I'll be "overweight" not obese, for the first time in at least 20 years. I have a Fitbit flex which gets me moving. I have PCOS as well. Oh and I'm a New Yorker - living in NC - but grew up on Long Island, and lived in Manhattan as an adult. I love this site and it gets a lot of credit for my losses. Feel free to add if you 'd like. Others can as well
  • IndependentMe
    IndependentMe Posts: 182 Member
    Please add me, we can do this.