Do people close to you REALLY understand your goals and help motivate you??

Hi Jason I completely agree. While my partner supports me in my weight loss because he is a bit of a fitness fanatic himself, he has been blessed with a fast metabolism and low body fat % which means that he looks amazing when he tries to eat well but when he doesn't, while he'll put on a couple of pounds or at most 7 lbs he will still look great and be nowhere near an unhealthy body fat % or weight.

This means that he will go through periods of eating a lot of junk and it's very tempting for me to join in.

Other than that, I have friends around me who are all smaller than me and who are used to seeing me the way I am and they constantly tell me I look 'fine' and I don't need to bother losing weight! This is really not helpful and as they are not in my position they can't understand how I feel. It's especially frustrating as most of them are around my height and my target weight/body fat level. They just can't see that while it's easy for them to be the way they are and maintain that without even trying, it's a lot harder for me. They simply tell me that we are all built differently and that I'm a bigger build etc. but it's simply not true. The truth is that I've not been blessed with good genes and I put on weight a lot easier than they do and I really have to watch what I put in my mouth to avoid putting on weight!

A couple of years ago when I lost around 16 lbs and before that when I lost 20 lbs all I got from them was comments about how I looked 'too thin' when in reality I was still bigger than they were. I find it really demotivating and it's almost like they were jealous that I was close to looking as slim as they were. Now I'm bigger again and trying to lose weight they tell me not to change and compliment me on how great I look all the time.

I would love to have more people around me going through what I am and that's why I find this site a great help. Nobody really understands what you're going through unless they have been there too.

I think I've been in your fiancées shoes in not understanding why my husband just made more food/a shake after I just cooked or vice versa. Now I've learned that we have different goals, but as long as we support each other that is what matters.
Since I do 98% of the cooking my husband only gave my a funny look once when he saw me weighing food, then he asked what I was doing and learned about the scale..smooth sailing ever since...but if he decides to cook for me I'll just very happily eat whatever he makes since if doesn't happen too often.

I actually find my husband very grounding. I can slip into an almost too focused mindset with my eating/exercising where I am totally overdoing it and spending more time and energy focused on what I am eating then I should.
He is a very small build naturally but I find when he questions my obsessive behavior it's usually because I'm starting to go overboard.

by the way I should add that im always up to accepting requests from new friends that need support too :-)

Sometimes when you're going so far as weighing everything out perfectly people can, and most will, think it's a little excessive. I don't get upset over it, because I've seen my mother weigh out her food and automatically think "oh for goodness sake" then realise I'm probably waiting to do exactly the same thing. It can look very odd, or obsessive, but it's not until you get this app, dedicate yourself to calorie counting and fitness that you realise you do need to carefully measure/monitor everything if you want to stay on track.

Even though I do weigh a lot of things, log everything, sometimes not eat the same foods as my family etc, I still do think that some people can be far too excessive and/or obsessive with their food. For example, if I had a bunch of people round for dinner and someone was bulking or watching their weight I'd expect them to go for the healthy options and avoid dessert, perhaps. But I would not expect them to request special foods because they're on a special diet, or refuse to eat most of it. That's just rudeness, and one meal slightly off-goal in such situations is not going to ruin your plans.

Having said that, I have a few friends who I live with at uni who try to stay healthy and eat low calorie as well, so I'm quite lucky. However, one friend has a slight issue with food and her weight.She likes eating, and eats. But the problem is her pure obsession with food. She gets anxiety when she overeats or puts on a couple pounds. She hates the thought of someone else being lighter than her. So she will constantly ask me (and others) my weight, inspect my food, and tell me I'm not eating enough (once she had soup for dinner, and I had a big plate of fish and veg and rice and she told me I wasn't eating enough), and then complain about how she's stuffed her face that day in an attempt to make others around her eat more than her (at least, what her friends think the reason is). I feel bad for her, but she doesn't seem ill as she actually loves eating food, just slightly food and weight obsessed. So it's not that she doesn't understand people having and wanting to reach goals. She understands perfectly from her own experiences… but she isn't supportive of her friends. She encourages others to eat, and to eat junk food, and tells us we don't need to lose more weight, rather than helping us reach our goals.

sorry for the super long post got carried away !