Nervous, excited and dreading failure!

erinclaireoakley
erinclaireoakley Posts: 4
in Introduce Yourself
Hi everyone,

My name is Erin and I'm a 22 year old fat chick. All my life I have been overweight and I'm getting to the stage where I'm totally lost.
I've got such a supportive boyfriend, family and friends - so why is it everytime I try to loose weight I just can't. I don't have the willpower and just give up on myself every time.

I'm at the stage now where I just need to get my head down and go for it. I've never used a forum or anything along those lines, so I don't even know how this works.
My plan is to do the shakes for two meals a day, a healthy nutritious dinner and two healthy snacks - just to begin with so I can get a kick start (I've tried every healthy eating plan in the book).

Some support, success stories, tips and mentoring would be just what I need on the start to this journey.

Thanks everyone xx

Replies

  • scsmith04
    scsmith04 Posts: 1
    Hi Erin. I've rejoined Fitness Pal but never used the community option before, so I thought I'd give it a try. I am 32 years old, elementary school teacher. It's nice to meet you!

    I recently learned that I have a thyroid issue that has caused me to gain weight. With medication, my thyroid is back on track but now I need to lose the pounds! I am looking for motivation, encouragement, and support and would like to provide the same to you. :)
  • astrose00
    astrose00 Posts: 754 Member
    Hi, Erin. Good luck with your goals. You can do whatever you set your mind to. Just take it one day at at time and refuse to be derailed. Before you know it, weight will start coming off and you will be motivated to continue even more. Stop allowing doubt to creep in. The only person picking up the fork is you.

    Someone on here had a really great saying "Make a promise to someone you love; yourself". I gained a bunch of weight over the last 3 years and finally got fed up. I never, ever thought I would fail because I know I am the one in control. I've lost almost 50lbs since September and am feeling great.

    Feel free to add me if you want friends or food ideas. I think you should EAT your calories and not drink them. Perhaps your shakes will be filling but I have never found them as filling as food that I chew.
  • Kf82
    Kf82 Posts: 2
    Hi I'm new here too. I also have tried everything and I just seem to fall off the wagon. I know for me my relationship with food has become out of control. It's like a co-dependant relationship on steroids. So I'm just really trying to be aware of what is going into my body and making each meal a choice and reminding myself that I can choose to put things in my body that are gonna nurture it or that are gonna be satisfying for about five minutes and then lead me to beat myself up for them latter.
    Amyways that was kinda alot but I know if I can do this today so can you! !!!!
  • gramarye
    gramarye Posts: 586 Member
    Hi! I had so much failure anxiety when I started. I was at about 300 pounds, and just assumed I could never change anything. So I totally believe you can do this! :D If you want any advice (and please, do tell me to eff off if you don't), this is what I'd give:

    I would recommend not trying to change everything all at once. I spent most of my teens and early twenties trying to change every single little food and exercise habit without much information -- of course I failed. :D

    Now I've been at this for two years, and have had several breaks/maintenance times during holidays and long periods of duress. I attribute my lack of failure in those times to accumulating certain habits slowly and naturally, and recognizing when I was slipping back into old habits that led to my weight gain. (Snacking while reading. Oh my god, it's the worst.)
  • mamanewland
    mamanewland Posts: 281 Member
    Hi! Welcome! You can so do this! I've lost almost 40 pounds in less than a year. I never thought it was possible! Add me as a friend if you want.
  • erinclaireoakley
    erinclaireoakley Posts: 4
    Hi everyone!
    Thanks for such a great response - I definitely think forums are a great tool, already feeling pumped thanks to you all!

    The world of dieting/healthy eating is so full of do's and donts - it quite literally leaves me baffled. I've gone to the extremes - from weight watchers, hypnotherapy, nutritionists and even weight loss surgery. I'm only young and that's a lot to have tried! One person tells you one thing, and the next tells you another - how are you meant to know who to believe and what to do?! Xx
  • So_Much_Fab
    So_Much_Fab Posts: 1,146 Member
    You can do it, but you just may not know *how* to do it.

    Read these posts, they'll help with your "education":

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1

    http://fit101.org/the-step-by-step-guide-to-losing-weight-with-myfitnesspal/

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1235566/so-youre-new-here/p1

    Good luck!
  • grandmothercharlie
    grandmothercharlie Posts: 1,356 Member
    One year ago Friday, I joined MFP with over 100 pounds to lose. I've managed 76 pounds (lost 8 prior to that, but I don't count those here). Here are tips:

    1. Make supportive friends on MFP. People in the same place that you are.
    2. Look in the Groups and see if there is a group of people with similar demographics. Join. If they aren't supportive, unjoin.
    3. Read the success stories forum. They are inspirational. Watch the other general forums as people can get snarky and can be non-supportive.
    4. Log everything you eat. Don't lie no matter what! You will have good days and bad. Either way, log! Make your diary public at least to your friends. If you have friends who aren't encouraging or who criticize, dump them. You are here for support, not to get beaten up.
    5. Be just as encouraging to others.
    6. Move. Do whatever you can. You will not be the fattest person at the gym and, even if you are, no one cares. Start slowly. Do what you can and what you like. You don't need a trainer to walk or ride a stationary bike.
    7. Try not to eat back your exercise calories.
    8. Don't wait for others to workout with you or diet with you. This is your journey. In most cases, they will give up and then, so will you!
    9. Be patient. Weight loss takes a while and then it takes forever beyond that to maintain!

    Good luck!
    GrandmotherCharlie
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  • jenlaura
    jenlaura Posts: 28 Member
    edited January 2015
    Hi there! Good decision to start changing your lifestyle.

    Some people might question you doing the whole meal replacement shake thing but honestly? Last April I did the same thing to kick start my journey and it worked (for me) the only thing I truly regret about it is I am pretty convinced I lost muscle mass doing that because you only really seem to have 800-1100 calories a day doing those, even with maybe 3 snacks a day + your own meal and the 2 shakes.

    I was 255lbs when I did this and I lost 8lb in the first week and another 8lb in the second week and it spurred me on, and I am still going. I am now 182 lbs and while I feel I would never do something like that again, it did work for me. Just be prepared to lose some muscle too. I did it for 2 weeks then moved onto regular meals that I fit into my calorie allowance.

    I wish you the best of luck.
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    Welcome! If I could give you some unsolicited advice... Make changes that you can live with for the rest of your life. Living on shakes is going to get old fast and you're going to fail at it -- guaranteed. I know you said it's just a "kick start," but if you're going to fail and feel bad and overeat because of it, why bother? Why not just track and log your food, eat at a slight calorie deficit so you're not hungry all the time, and get out and do some form of exercise every day? That's much more doable over the long term. Losing weight is not complicated -- just eat less than you burn. What's complicated is your psychological and emotional relationship to food. Seek out some help...there are therapists and nutritionists out there who specialize in food/emotion issues. Best of luck to you!
  • emdeesea
    emdeesea Posts: 1,823 Member
    Welcome and my advice: ditch the shakes. There's no such thing as a "kick start." You have to change your habits.

    Weigh and track all of your food to include a calorie deficit. It really is as easy as calories in<Calories out

    You're 22 and have a higher metabolism so should be easier for you. If a 43-yo woman like me can do it, you can too. But don't do the shakes. Such a waste of money, and you won't be learning any good habits from it.
  • godonmyside
    godonmyside Posts: 10 Member
    Hey girl, my names Victoria I'm 25 years old and I have 80 lbs to lose to get to my goal. I just had my second son last month and I'm looking to get back ontop of my weight loss goal. Feel free to add me and message me anytime you want we can be each other's support, I just started my fitness pal back up and majority of the people I had don't get on anymore so I feel like I'm starting over in that department!
  • CupcakeCrusoe
    CupcakeCrusoe Posts: 1,412 Member
    edited January 2015
    0somuchbetter0 wrote: »
    Welcome! If I could give you some unsolicited advice... Make changes that you can live with for the rest of your life. Living on shakes is going to get old fast and you're going to fail at it -- guaranteed. I know you said it's just a "kick start," but if you're going to fail and feel bad and overeat because of it, why bother? Why not just track and log your food, eat at a slight calorie deficit so you're not hungry all the time, and get out and do some form of exercise every day? That's much more doable over the long term. Losing weight is not complicated -- just eat less than you burn. What's complicated is your psychological and emotional relationship to food. Seek out some help...there are therapists and nutritionists out there who specialize in food/emotion issues. Best of luck to you!

    Welcome! I think you'll like it here. :)

    More unsolicited advice:

    There is no plan. Just eat food, keep your numbers in the green, and you're golden! It's the best part about this site.

    If you feel the need for this kick-start, just don't get discouraged if some weight comes back at the end of it- that's what happened to me (I did the lean20 shakes for a little while).

    Feel free to add me- I've been here for a couple years and I've lost just about 60 lbs and kept it off. I have a little more weight I'm losing, to the tune of another 10-15 lbs.

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