Eating my feelings... but not sure what those feelings are

teaspoon43
teaspoon43 Posts: 238 Member
edited November 10 in Health and Weight Loss
I have a good day, I eat a lot.
I have a bad day, I eat a lot.
I love to eat, a lot.

Am I addicted to food? I'm not sure. I would say I was an emotional eater but does that really count if I eat with every emotion? I have no one that I can confide in to help me better understand so I thought what better than to reach out to my MFP friends.

I start every day with good intentions. Coffee with a sweetner, high fiber oatmeal and either a banana or a piece of toast with peanut butter. I drink water with lemon in it at work. I bring apples, almonds, carrots, yogurt and snack on them when I'm feeling a little hungry. I truly enjoy these foods and don't feel deprived.

When lunch time rolls around (I go home every day because I let my dogs out) I turn into someone I don't know. I want fast food and a lot of it. I don't want to go home and eat the chicken salad or casserole I set aside for lunch. And if I see my husband cooking/eating pizza bagel bites or chips I say "screw this whole thing I'm just going to eat those". We all know what happens the rest of the day... you already gave in/up so you'll just start fresh tomorrow.

How and why does this keep happening? Honestly I do eat junk as part of my lifestyle but I count it and don't feel guilty but when this "feeling" comes over me I don't track and just eat, eat eat. Because of this I obviously don't feel like going to the gym after work because I feel so fat and then I get tired and head to bed early. The cycle starts again the next day.

Has anyone gone through this? What was your strategy for overcoming and/or coping with it? I'm so read to commit but I think that's going to be extremely hard until I figure out what's going on emotionally with me.

Replies

  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    perhaps you need to incorporate those foods into your current eating plan..if you are denying yourself food you love chances are you will fall back into old habits. I eat chocolate everynight after 8pm as my treat...a full serving of yummy milk chocolate with a diet coke which means i don't go looking for anything during the day.

    As well if they fit in a reasonable calorie goal why not eat pizza I do some days when I get home at lunch and my husband has cooked one...or a sub or even McDonalds...and it doesn't ruin my whole day I fit it in.
  • teaspoon43
    teaspoon43 Posts: 238 Member
    I already do that SezxyStef, I couldn't live without this stuff! The problem lies when I feel like this I eat it but in excess and don't log it because I "give up"
  • mattyc772014
    mattyc772014 Posts: 3,543 Member
    I am an emotional eater and I can say that what helps me is I try to catch myself before it gets out of hand. Remember you are in this for the long hall. So if you mess up a couple of weeks, try to make a streak of doing really good for 8 weeks. Find something that you can relieve stress with. Working out is that for me. If you need to speak to a professional about your emotions then do so. And most important is not to give up. Make this a life change and when you have these emotions, post here or in your status. MFP friends will help. :)
  • Branstin
    Branstin Posts: 2,320 Member
    It is happening because it takes time to develop new habits. The key is to stick with it and never give up. You can't change the past so forget about it and don't dwell on it because it doesn't do anything but mentally drain you of energy you could be using to focus on the future. Plan for the week ahead of time and incorporate pizza, fast food, and anything else you want into your calories for the day or week. Change takes time but as long as you keep trying you will get it but you have to do the work.
  • paradi3s
    paradi3s Posts: 343 Member
    it may be an empty void you're trying to fill? that's what i used to do, too. i skipped breakfast, ate a huge lunch in school, and when i arrived home, i eat my heart out, THEN eat dinner. it took me a few months and discipline to realize that i was trying to fill something that never even existed. sure, i was hungry at times, but i realized that i was always eating even when i wasn't hungry. i was full but still kept eating and never knew why. so i started off slowly, by lessening my rice intake, fighting off midnight cravings, and eventually counting calories. i know it's obvious when i say "just don't give up!", but in order to keep going, you have to learn to never quit or postpone things for the next day. start NOW! it may be day or night there, but learn to just go slowly. take a 15 minute walk, say no to something when you know it's over your calorie goal, etc. take it one day at a time, and eventually, the cravings will slowly disappear. it has for me!

    eat in moderation. eat slowly (only take another bite once you've swallowed your last one, savor the flavor) and try putting everything you're going to eat in one plate, just make sure you don't fill it up so much or too little, just the right amount. hmm and maybe lessen the amount of "junk" you buy and have your husband support you, too!
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,029 Member
    teaspoon43 wrote: »
    I already do that SezxyStef, I couldn't live without this stuff! The problem lies when I feel like this I eat it but in excess and don't log it because I "give up"
    Then your feelings could be that you don't deserve to lose. Fear of success is an obstacle for many because once you get there, you have to keep it up or some may feel that others will scoff at them for not being able to retain success. No doubt it's a conscious effort on a daily basis and some don't do well with it.
    It takes commitment to get there and stay there. It also takes consistency. Learn both.
    I'll just say that lean people go through emotional and stressful periods too.................they just don't use food as a way to handle it.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

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  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    teaspoon43 wrote: »
    I already do that SezxyStef, I couldn't live without this stuff! The problem lies when I feel like this I eat it but in excess and don't log it because I "give up"
    I'd be careful labeling yourself an 'emotional eater' or any of that. We're human, we all enjoy food- the more caloric, the better. It's not a weakness.

    Logging can feel like a noose. If you're resisting it, maybe try something else. Aim for hitting goals of what you CAN eat rather than can't, for example. Instead of "I must be under 1500 calories" try, "I will eat some fruit, greens and lean protein daily. I will use produce for snacks 90% of the time. I will aim for an hour a day of movement. I will hit these goals 5 days a week." Try something like Health Month for tracking goals. Or a more lenient plan like WW or South Beach Diet or any of the more respected books or plans out there. It doesn't have to be "track everything or eat indiscriminately".

    Good luck!

  • aakaakaak
    aakaakaak Posts: 1,240 Member
    Teaspoon, try fitting in some protein in the morning. Switch from the oatmeal to a protein bar or your favorite greek yogurt and see if you're still insanely hungry for fast food at lunch. If you are you could just be stuck with a habit you need to break yourself of. Remember that habits can take 18-66 days to change (according to Google).
  • Rehobobound
    Rehobobound Posts: 143 Member
    I'm right there with you. For me, I've been doing a bit of soul searching because I honestly believe it goes further than making the right choice; although we absolutely need to do that to the best of our ability! Tracking can help identify those pitfall times you didn't know existed. Although, as stated above, choosing a program that doesn't involve tracking, but healthy menu plans is a great idea.

    I'm not sure if I read your post right, is your husband also home at lunch? Can he let the dogs out for awhile so you can avoid the lunchtime pitfall? Or, can you eat lunch before going home to let the dogs out? Sometimes a change in routine can help.
  • Momnoon1977
    Momnoon1977 Posts: 31 Member
    You just summed up my life in a nutshell. I eat the same way. I have admitted to myself and my husband that I have a problem. I am determined to change my life for the better. It is an exhausting cycle and I am sick of letting it control my life.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    I suggest analysing a single event where discipline breaks down to figure it out, then brainstorming a possible solution. Test it out and if it works, keep doing it. If it doesn't, try something else. I learned this technique from a Stanford program. There's a book available too.
    http://patienteducation.stanford.edu/programs/cdsmp.html

    I find I get in to a habit that is hard to break. For instance, head for the refrigerator as soon as I get home. It's a matter of breaking one chain in the habit. It might mean stashing the goodies and placing a salad front-and-center in the refrigerator. Or popping mint gum in your mouth before you open the front door. Do something to disrupt the pattern.

    To get more insight in to your emotions and if you are in to apps, try iMoodJournal. I learned more about myself and my highs and lows. I am happiest in the morning and at the beginning of the week, then it is downhill from there. It's insight. I can use this insight to plan.

    Do you go for different foods if you are happy or sad?

    Here's a blog where I talk about halting a binging session:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/jgnatca/view/halting-a-binge-session-715131
  • troyindallas
    troyindallas Posts: 18 Member
    Been there, did that, nothing worked until I took more drastic actions. Drastic helped and helps me stay focused. My goal, get out of bed and back with as few injuries as possible. You can't partake in your bad habits and win. You are walking in a minefield. You need to walk through a preschool's playground. Remember, to bed with no injuries.

    I limited my diet for 30 days know I would increase as I discovered what works and what didn't. I went to like 5-6 food choices a day and stuck with it. The drastic helped me focus. I learned that sodium was my killer, made me bloat, feel fat, feel bad and want to pig out on....more sodium type foods. Once I started looking at sodium as much as I did calories, the weight started coming off. The weight lost become my new focus and the food was just a means to get their. After 30 days, I began adding foods and waiting for an injury. When one didn't come, I was good to go, if one did have a negative affect, I would edit or avoid it. I am now two months in and food is loosing it's grip. I am so accustom to certain foods, when I need to eat my body craves it, instead of old habits. I feel better and even "desired" to join the Y and actually go. It lets me have more options with the quantity of food, even though I am still slowing growing my food list.

    I do agree with the other poster. Get more protein in the morning. I eat two or three eggs every morning and it helps me not get hungry until late afternoon. I still eat something at lunch, but it isn't because I am hungry, it just helps me not crash mid-day. Good luck.
  • teaspoon43
    teaspoon43 Posts: 238 Member
    You guys are seriously the best. Thank you for all the non-judgement insight... although I hate that other people have this same issue, it feels good to not be the only one.

    My husband and I work together so I either pack a lunch and stay at work while he lets the dogs out or I go home with him with intensions of eating a healthy lunch.

    I definitely feel like I derserve to lose and have my ideal body but I think I'm scared. I love the protein idea, not logging everything and just trying to be healthy for a while. I feel like MFP can sometimes be a noose as someone mentioned. If I'm cooking a meal I'm paranoid that I get all the calories calculated right and it seems like it takes too much effort so I just reach for something easy thats already labeled. Maybe if I get in the healthy cycle I will be able to log and head further in the right direction.

    What would I do without my MFP family?
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
    If you're going to go the not logging in MFP route, I'd suggest still keeping a food diary. Don't log calories or anything, but still keep track of what you eat. If you run into problems, it'll be a useful tool to figure out what you need to change. And you can always go back and figure out the calories and macros if it turns out you need that info.
  • teaspoon43
    teaspoon43 Posts: 238 Member
    Excellent idea Stealthq! If I see it on paper I will be less likely to think "ohh I ate pretty good today I should be okay to have these extra calories" because I will have it in writing!
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    Log it anyway. After a while, you may get tired of seeing all that junk on your diary. If it's a real problem, seek professional help. If you're someone who sees change as "oh, no" instead of "aha" a dispassionate observation may help.
  • Cheriesaurus
    Cheriesaurus Posts: 92 Member
    For me I was in a habit and my mild OCDness makes it worse so it's hard to break. I would binge on Dominos every weekend and if I didn't buy it even when I didn't feel like it as much as usual and mum cooked something nice I still had to get it. Moving houses broke that awful cycle though, haven't had dominos in months >_> turns out I liked the idea of gaming and eating pizza at the same time more then actually eating it. Now I like drinking tea and gaming. :D Most of my whole weightloss journey has been realisation more than anything else.
  • Sarasari
    Sarasari Posts: 139 Member
    You may not be eating enough or soon enough. I have my most success when I have a cheese stick before a workout,( 5 am)protein with breakfast( 7:15 am), cheese stick am snack,( 10:00) lunch(12), nuts, cheese stick , or lean protein for snack,( 3:00) dinner. (6:30). I put the times on there so you could see it's okay to have a little something every couple of hours to keep you on track and keep portions manageable. Don't forget your water too. Sometimes we are just thirsty.

  • teaspoon43
    teaspoon43 Posts: 238 Member
    I think everyone here has such helpful tips. It's nice knowing that people were able to overcome this and can look back at their accomplishments. Maybe I'll start a blog to detail how I'm feeling and what I want and why I feel I want it. Hopefully I can pinpoint whats going on in order to move on.
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