This time, I am determined to be successful.

smr09012 · January 2015

I just really felt like I needed to get all of this out there...

Height - 5'1
Beginning Weight - 315 (currently at 311.7... thanks MFP)

This is arguably one of the most awkward things I've ever written. I was strolling through the mall a few days after New Year's when I caught a glimpse of myself on a window at one of my favorite stores. Not the frontal view I was used to seeing all the time, but a big, nasty side view. It. Was. Mortifying.

I just want to put it out there that I've always been big, but growing up I was still really active. Until middle school I swam competitively, and through high school I played softball, basketball, and volleyball. I wasn't super-talented (I probably could have been if I were smaller, but that's a whole other can of emotions I don't even want to open), but I enjoyed playing and it kept me pretty active. Regardless, I was a size 18 when I graduated from high school.

Fast forward nine years, and I'm probably 75lbs heavier and two sizes larger.

*kitten*.

So the being big isn't what bothers me, I've been big my whole life, but it's the BIIIIGGGGGG I've become that is mortifying. About a week ago, I was watching TLC (don't judge me) and a commercial for My 600lb Life came on. There was my lightbulb. THAT. IS. GOING. TO. BE. ME. I am DETERMINED to make a change.

My goal is 200lbs. I don't ever foresee myself being "skinny," but, damn it, I want to be less fat. I'm starting by just watching my calorie intake (under 2000 per day) and eliminating pop. When I make that routine (and after my mock trial coaching season is over), I'm going to begin nightly walks. At 250, I want to start the Couch to 5K program. THIS TIME, I AM DETERMINED TO BE SUCCESSFUL.

vixtris · January 2015

I've sent you a friend request!

I, too, have never had the experience of being thin (loling inside a little bit as that sounds weird) but, determined as much as you are to change that! I hope we can keep each other motivated!

lisaab27 · January 2015

I'm Lisa. I'm starting to diet again. I have type 2 diabetes and high blood pressure and I damaged my heart from my crummy diet. God was tapping on my shoulder to make a change, but I was ignoring Him. You can only ignore God so long before He gives you a kick in the backside. I weighed 327 lbs. and I got that kick. After being rushed to the ER, I vowed to eat healthy and I lost 130 lbs. I started swimming laps even though I am a crummy swimmer, and in the winter I was walking, only a mile a day due to knee problems but it's helped. Then I hurt my knee again and went to PT. (Walking is still more difficult.) I still watched my diet but I decided not to continue to be as strict, I was going to "maintain" for awhile despite knowing I still had weight to lose. For awhile I was doing great but I started slipping gradually. Constant knee problems made it hard to walk and though I watch my salt I did allow more carbs into my diet. Right now, I haven't swam since the summer. Anyway, I vowed I was not going to allow myself to regain all my weight back so here I am. I feel the Lord, tapping on my shoulder again and I'm not ignoring Him this time! So I weighed myself yesterday and I have gained back almost 50 lbs over the last 2 years! I thought I gained back about 25! How we live in denial! I almost hit the floor. The diet I followed last time was a medical diet given me, it is a diabetic diet to help control my sugars and also to lose weight. So I count carbs, not calories. I must eat 5 meals a day: breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, snack. The 3 meals are only 45 carbs at breakfast, lunch and dinner, plus 2 ounces protein at lunch, 3 ounces protein at dinner. Snacks are only 15 carbs allowed. I have to measure everything. I have a little scale and I have some measuring cups that I use. If you eyeball it, you will give yourself more. It is a 1800 calorie diet, if you count calories. One of the ways I messed up is that I started allowing myself to go out to eat on the weekends. Good on watching my food all week, go out to eat on Sunday after church. Then it was Saturday AND Sunday! Dieting the first time, I didn't go out to eat very often. And when I did, I cut my portions in half before I took my first bite. I had stopped doing that also. Anyway, to help me kick off my diet again, I told my husband no going out to eat for at least 3 months (New Year's resolution). Right now I'm trying to figure out how to work the myfitnessplan stuff. I can only have 3 ounces of protein at dinner, but the diary has lowest amount as 4 ounces. Is there a way of changing that? I kept a food diary in a notebook when I lost weight last time, but my husband bought me a Fitbit and it links to myfitnesspal and he thinks this will be better so I'm going to give it a go. (Fitbit won't let you count carbs while myfitnesspal will.) I'm hoping that having friends who understand what I'm trying to do, will help. I know the only reason I lost weight before is because of God. My self-control is bad and I am weak. I've found if I stop and pray, God will help me not to cheat. It's still hard, but He helps me through. It's hard to remember to do that sometimes! I know that I have to pray each and every time I'm tempted. And I'm tempted a lot! If you add me as a friend I hope we can help each other and pray for each other

Nichols94 · January 2015

I'm currently 20 years old, & weighing 258lbs... I'm in the same boat & my goal is also 200lbs. We can do this together! I sent a friend request

Panzer87 · January 2015

I see a lot of myself in your post. I feel your pain and know the struggle. I was very active when I was younger in dance and softball. But unfortunately I was sick a lot and placed on steroids to fight infections. It caused me to gain and keep weight on. I graduated high school in a size 16 then college in a size 18. I was looking at myself in recent photos and hated the person I let myself become. I had lost 50 pounds and gained it all back when I moved. I am 5'3'' and 253 pounds. The biggest I have been in my life. But luckily I love who I am just not how I look and I have a lot of positive outlook moving forward. 5 days in on my healthy eating and exercising I have dropped 2 pounds. Might not seem like much but that is a stepping stone to success. Stay motivated. Stay positive. Stay driven and focused. You aren't alone in the struggle. Best of luck. Add me if you would like! - Lisa

cebreisch · January 2015

Yes. I completely understand. almost 4 years ago, I went to a school event with my older child. They had us park on the back side of the school so as to not interfere with the bus drop offs at the front of the building. I could hardly walk to the door, and it wasn't all that far. When I got inside, I had to sit down because I was really huffing/puffing and had to sit on the floor because it was a hallway - no place to sit. I was mortified. I grumped at the teachers for making me walk so far. That was when I decided something had to change.

Here we are now, lots of stuff happened in the last few years, but am still 77 pounds down. This was the first year that I've actually made a New Years Resolution that I actually meant it - to do more with my weight loss efforts.

I'm 5'4 and 299 lbs as of last weigh in. (Started at 376.)

You can do this!! We can do this!!! Feel free to add me, too.

This time, I am determined to be successful.

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