Make seperate meals for you and SO

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Do you make different meals for you and your SO? How do you do it without being tempted to eat the other food or feeling like your spending all your time cooking?

My husband is supposed to eat 3600+ calories a day to maintain his weight because his job is so active, but he is trying to add some weight since he is 6' 4" and 155lbs. I on the other hand am trying to lose weight after having our daughter and am on a 1200 calorie a day diet. How do you handle different eating restrictions? I can't even figure out how to cram 3600-4000 calories into 1 day (and it still be relatively healthy). That is a ton of calories!

Any suggestions on keeping both of us on track? Do you have this problem too?

Replies

  • Laurend224
    Laurend224 Posts: 1,748 Member
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    Nope. We all eat the same thing. My husband just eats more of the meals I make and adds snacks in throughout the day. He is a very fit, 6 ft tall eating machine. Same with the kids, I'm the cook, they eat what I make. I should log what my husband eats daily to see exactly how much it is! :p
  • rekite2000
    rekite2000 Posts: 218 Member
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    No we all eat what I make. My husband will add cheese or other calorie dense snacks. Frankly, I am I charge of dinner for him- he is responsible for making sure he hits his goals. I will buy the good, but I am not going to cook all day for him. Sounds mean, but he is fine with it :-).
  • Christine_72
    Christine_72 Posts: 16,049 Member
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    I do alternate day fasting. On my fasting days, hubby cooks his own meals. On normal days I eat the same meal as him, just less.
  • MaggieLoo79
    MaggieLoo79 Posts: 288 Member
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    We eat the same thing, he just has way bigger portions.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    I cook. He eats what I cook. It pleases him that he can lose weight just by doing what I do. If a meal is "meh" to him, he breaks out the beans. My portions are a fraction of what he eats.

    His snack cupboard has a lot of chocolate in it.

    I go for savory crispy salty.

    I'd think to fill up a guy trying to hit 3600 calories a day, he has his own snack stash with calorie dense foods like beef jerky and trail mix. Full fat milk to drink with his meals.
  • alyssa_6481
    alyssa_6481 Posts: 31 Member
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    My boyfriend has much different calorie needs than I do as well. I make small substitutions. For example, last night I made turkey meatballs with green beans and pasta for him and I ate my meatballs on top of green beans and peas, skipping the pasta. I often will substitute the pasta or rice that I make him with vegetables (he also loves carbs and I am better off keeping them in check). I will also do things like cut my steak in half or give myself much smaller portions sizes of the same food.

    I do 99% of the cooking so I make his lunches (often leftovers such as casseroles topped with cheese for added calories and fats) separate from mine (usually salads, cottage cheese with avocado, greek yogurt with cinnamon/honey and chunks of apple). I also keep protein bars on hand for him and we always have hard boiled eggs in the fridge. He usually takes both to work every day. He also drinks a lot of juice and milk, neither of which I use much of and are easy calories without being pop.

    Feel free to send me a message if you want more ideas!
  • PeachyCarol
    PeachyCarol Posts: 8,029 Member
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    We eat different meals. I have celiac, he doesn't. I'm a vegetarian, he isn't. A lot of the food that he can eat, I either can't eat or am not even tempted to eat.

    I don't work (though I homeschool our children so am busy during the day), and I like to eat my main meal during the day. My husband does too. His schedule is such that he gets home from work at unpredictable times. I usually cook ahead and he brings left overs to work. The meals are usually enough for 3 or 4 portions. I cook alternating days for him & the kids and for me. Sometimes the kids eat something entirely different. I never end up cooking more than one meal at a time, though. We eat lightly at night, usually breakfast food.

    It all sounds weird and really odd, but it works for us. My husband is a phenomenally picky eater. I eat a lot of vegetables, and he pretty much only eats poultry, pasta, salad, and rice. I can cook an awful lot of variations on those themes.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
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    I make all the same meals but like others said I make small substitutions. Like I might eat more veggies instead of rice/potoatos. Or if i eat rice and potatos I just fit smaller portion and make sure it fits my calories for the day.
  • softblondechick
    softblondechick Posts: 1,276 Member
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    That is my world. So, we often eat same meals, I eat less, add a salad. As for the increase in calories for your spouse, fats and carbs. Pizza, fettuccine...and you go on low carb, you could still eat high fat, but no pasta. Portion control for you. Serve meals from stove, weigh your portion.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
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    No way. We eat the same meal. The only difference is he eats more of the carb-y side dish and I eat more of the meat.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
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    No way. I have four people to cook for every day (and breakfast and lunch for three).

    I make things everyone eats, and just control my portions.
  • DancingMoosie
    DancingMoosie Posts: 8,613 Member
    edited January 2015
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    No, he eats what I cook. I do ask him for input on the menu ahead of time, but I prepare it in what I consider a healthy way. I know what veggies are not his faves(squash and greens) so if I'm in the mood for those, I will usually offer another side (broccoli, mixed veg, etc) so there will be something we both like. I don't purposely make meals he won't like. That said, if it is not enough for him, he can always take extra portions or have bread and butter on the side, or add some extra gravy or something.

    For your husband, he should probably try to add some whole milk to drink with meals, add butter or oil to veggies, add extra potato on the side, sprinkle extra cheese on pasta/veggies/potatoes.
  • peleroja
    peleroja Posts: 3,979 Member
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    I cook one meal for him (a large "family" portion so he can have more later or the next day) and one for me. I like to cook, he likes to eat, and if I do large quantities for him it's no more work than a small portion, really.

    I taste sauces and stuff but in very small amounts and I just have a "don't touch" rule with his food. I don't have trouble staying away from it, honestly. Sometimes I include stuff I don't like as a deterrent though :)
  • AliceDark
    AliceDark Posts: 3,886 Member
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    I don't eat meat and my BF does, so we do a lot of meals with the same base and then add meat for him if he wants to (or veggie-meat for me). We cook pasta with marinara sauce or a vegetable and rice stir-fry, things like that. Or I'll make waffles with eggs for me and sausage for him.
  • muah3iluvzu06
    muah3iluvzu06 Posts: 79 Member
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    I cook one meal and he just eats a much larger portion.
  • bwogilvie
    bwogilvie Posts: 2,130 Member
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    My wife and I sit down once a week and plan our menus and shopping lists for the week. I'm the cook, and we eat the same thing. In our case, the amount of food I needed to eat to lose weight is about the same as she needs to maintain (she's a perfect weight), so we eat about the same size portions. But when I've done a long workout, or if I ate over goal for the weekend and need to make it up (or anticipate a feast), I'll use different portion sizes.

    In your case, I would make meals that could be scaled up or down easily. If you made chicken cacciatore, for instance, you might use 6 chicken pieces, and take one for yourself and give him two, with proportional amounts of sauce. (I'm presuming you make leftovers too, especially with a stew.) He could add a handful of nuts or some peanut butter toast if he needs more.

    Initially it can be hard to reconcile yourself to eating less than your dinner partner, but after a while you get used to it. My mom eats a lot less than her husband, because he's on his feet in the shop most of the day, and she's recovering from a foot injury. It's just the way it is: he needs more fuel than her.
  • higgins8283801
    higgins8283801 Posts: 844 Member
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    Nope. I just eat way less of what everyone else is eating.
  • CObluegrass
    CObluegrass Posts: 61 Member
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    my husband also needs to eat a lot to maintain his weight and he's always looking to gain. we make one meal but different portions or maybe in a slightly different way. He's in the kitchen right now making cashew chicken with broccoli, and he'll have a large portion over pasta whereas I'll have my measured portion with no pasta tonight. He always gets more of the starchy side and I have a larger portion of veggies.
  • JentheN13
    JentheN13 Posts: 8 Member
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    Yes!!!!! My man is a good ole Southern boy who works on our ranch! Needless to say he can drink sweet tea and fried food all day and is still a rail from all the hard work he does that burn and burn! Me on the other hand has packed them on!

    I try to cook meals that last for a least two days or can be dinner one night and lunch the next to limit my kitchen time to not 24/7.

    To help with temptations I try to make a heathy version of what I am cooking for him. This week I have cooked:

    Him: Fried chicken and fries
    Me: baked skinless chicken and baked sweet potato

    Him: lasagna w/ bread
    Me: cabbage rolls with tomato sauce

    Him: Italian subs with ranch and chips
    Me: turkey Sammie on a wheat thin with carrots

    And I always have just as much unsweet tea in the fridge as I do sweet tea!

    It's hard! Maybe we can motivate each other! Glad to know I am not alone!

    Jen
  • stellamozzarrella
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    I hear you! I work in a sedentary office environment and my SO works in construction and comes home RAVENOUS.

    My usual technique is to make a nutritious healthy meal that fits in with all of my calorie and macro needs for both of us, and then quickly whip up a side of something filling and calorie-dense for him that I avoid.

    For example, the other night I made roast chicken and a salad of lettuce, herbs and fresh veges (it's summer here!) for both of us to share, and then I cooked up a huge portion of fettucine with good lug of olive oil and basil for him to have to himself. Pasta only takes a few minutes and doesn't need a lot of looking after, so it doesn't really feel lke extra work. That way, he's full, I'm happy, and we don't blow our budget. (If I had to cook enough meat to fill him up, we'd be broke in a month.)

    It can be tricky dealing with temptation and jealousy - God I wish I could eat the way he does - but at the end of the day if I've eaten the way I want to and I feel good, that's all I could possibly want for myself. And hey, if I steal a few bites of pasta off his plate, that's cool too. (I get the "JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!" response sometimes...)