Starting to believe I'm not meant to lose weight...

vanfox23
vanfox23 Posts: 110
edited September 27 in Health and Weight Loss
So for about a year I've been on a plateau. I lose and gain the same 3-5 pounds. I am working out like a fiend....most days 2 workouts a day in addition to keeping up with two kids, a husband and 3 acres of land. I am eating around 2000 calories a day. I start to get excited when my weight goes down, but then discouraged when it goes back up. I've tried weighing once a week and it's the same few numbers every week. I did the P90X lean, and can't even say I lost any weight because I'm still yo-yo-ing aroung the same numbers. I'm in the first week of the classic routine now....and ready to give up. I mean why bother? I'm killing myself and not getting any results. What more can I do? Zig Zag calories? tried it. Eat more calories? tried it. Eat less calories? tried it. Eat every 2-3 hours? tried it. Eat low carb? tried it. Eat low fat? tried it. So tell me what more can I do? I feel I eat well and I should be happy that I'm not gaining but I'm sick of being overweight. I guess God intends for certain people in this world to be skinny and I'm just not one of them. Is this something I just need to accept?

Replies

  • SlowlyLosingLolita
    SlowlyLosingLolita Posts: 93 Member
    I know how you feel about being stuck.
    I had been stuck for years until recently. It can be a huge bummer, especially when you know you're doing everything right. Don't get discouraged, though! Have you tried talking to your doctor? Maybe there's something you're missing that he can catch.
  • missy1970eb
    missy1970eb Posts: 1,209 Member
    what type of food u eating, have u lost any inches?:smile:
  • EmmaShorter
    EmmaShorter Posts: 298
    I feel your pain. Losing weight is never easy. I certainly don't lose it in the same speed as i put it on if i stray off course. Are you drinking enough water? Are you measuring yourself? Maybe the inches are coming off first? Do you tend to eat late at night? Do you suffer with bad digestion?
  • EmmaShorter
    EmmaShorter Posts: 298
    Also maybe you have a food intolerance? Like gluten or wheat? Try getting this checked on.
  • I feel the same way, I have plateaued for about 1 and 1/2 years and seemed like I have tried everything. If I add anything else to my diet and exercise, then I won't be enjoying my lifestyle. I understand your frustration and I am also hoping to get some ideas from your post.. sorry I couldn't help you!!
  • lnadeau66
    lnadeau66 Posts: 135 Member
    Hey, I just noticed that you're are the same height and started at the same weight and have the same goals as I do. Traditionally, I always hit the same numbers for my plateaus, this time I am exercising more than ever, mostly cardio, and trying to stick to that 1200 cal diet, and no I try not to eat back my calories. I exercise daily, even if it's a half hour walk, and this seems to be helping. Also, if you are eating back your calories, do you have a HRM, that will give you a better idea as to how many calories you are burning? I got into trouble one week by going with my treadmill, which is wayyyyy off. Hang in There, your body may not want to give up that weight, but you CAN DO THIS! Lynn:flowerforyou:
  • I am having the same problem. I only eat around 1200 calories a day and typically eat back between 200 and 700, depending on how much I work out. I am faithfully logging every bite and every exercise. And every night MFP tells me that I should "weigh X in 5 weeks" and I am still like 7 lbs above that! It's SO frustrating! I have tried not eating back the calories, whihc is OK On the 200 days, but on the 700 I want to tear my own arm off and eat it, and I know that's not helping anything.

    At my heaviest I was 200 lbs (5' 4") and even though I am OK ith my weight now, I have a number in mind that I have always wanted to hit and I just can't get there. It makes me want to throw in the towel!

    Sorry that I don't have any words of wisdon, maybe someone will read this who can give us both some advice! It is just so darn frustrating. :( BUT - You're not alone, my friend!

    Can anyone give us some hope?!?!?!?!
  • WolffEarl
    WolffEarl Posts: 379 Member
    Two things come to mind here.
    First of all, Lucky you, you have been able to maintain your weight, unlike so many of us who balloon right up again after some time of inactivity. Secondly, it might be worthwhile for you to consider changes in other measurements or even better fitness goals. I bet, with all that exercising you have been doing, you can maybe run further, faster, lift more weights, do more push ups, squats, throw bales, wrestle horses, pull out weeds, than ever before. Those are more important than some number on the scale.
    You said "I'm killing myself and not getting any results". Surely all that exercise is getting results (if nothing else than keeping your body in fine form, no matter how heavy). Not sure that the same simple number formula (height of X = ideal weight of Y) is meant to be true for all women or men, way too many body type, muscle mass density variations for that. Many super fit football players would otherwise be considered way overweight. You might also be exrcising too much?
    I was going to suggest to look at the types of food you eat (open Diary?) but you seem to know exactly what you are doing there.
    For all you know you might not be overweight, just supremely muscular superwoman (no wonder with that much workout, kids, etc on your plate):)
  • If you are doing this much exercise and have been doing it for a year you are almost certainly much leaner than you were a year ago if not lighter. 2 workouts a day + having kids = phenomenal energy expenditure (depending on what it is you are defining as a workout of course)

    A lot of women your height might only eat 1200 calories a day to lose weight. Have you tried that and reducing your exercise to maybe 3 x 45 minute workouts per week? I know you have said you have tried everything but have you tried maintaining this for say 3 months at a time? Are you CERTAIN that you are recording every single calorie accurately? (personally I overestimate by 10% on most things I eat) As part of a family 'cheat' days are almost inevitable. If you have days where you have to overindulge, by how much are you overindulging?

    You shouldn't need to feel like you are killing yourself either. Provided calorie intake < calorie expenditure it is almost physically impossible not to lose weight. The best tip I ever had from someone for steady weight loss was that if you aren't feeling well, happy and healthy then your regime is wrong. A gentle hunger before meal time should be the extent of your suffering.
  • Ourjobasparents
    Ourjobasparents Posts: 10 Member
    Whatever you do, please don't give up. By any chance are you taking any medications that may cause weight gain? I am taking 4 blood pressure meds and a pill for depression and anxiety and they all made me gain 60 pounds in 3 months. I didn't know what was going on until I researched them a little. Just keep up the good work. Trying is better than not. With doing everything that you say you are doing and eating well, just the point of you getting your body healthier than not doing anything and eating badly is sometimes just enough. Hugs XXXXXXX <3:flowerforyou:
  • catcrazy
    catcrazy Posts: 1,740 Member
    Obviously 2000 must be around your maintenence level as you have stayed the same for a year.


    What calories have you tried...and how long did you try them for. When I first started I tried 1500-1800 calories for 4 months...was still gaining 3lb a month. I then tried 1200-1500 for another 4 months and my weight stabilised, nothing lost nothing gained.

    2000 calories seems pretty high to be trying to lose weight on especially for someone of your height. Try 1500 calories, 100% commitment for at least 2 months but preferably longer. Get a HRM to be more accurate in your exercise burn.
  • jlsAhava
    jlsAhava Posts: 411 Member
    Without seeing your food diary, it's difficult to offer any truly helpful suggestions.

    In general, though, I would suggest focusing on the QUALITY of the food your eating. Make sure you're getting in enough fruits and veges, and try to stay away from fast foods and processed foods. They can be a real diet killer. They're packed with sodium and sugars. Sodium is great for water retention and diet sabotage, and sugar, in all of its many highly processed forms is another great way to keep the pounds around. Also processed foods doesn't provide the same quality vitamins and minerals that fruits and veges do. By their names - ie. blueberry something or other - they try to make you believe the food contains fruits or vegetables, but a lot of the time it's just a chemical flavoring. The products are enriched with vitamins and minerals, but the body can't process these nearly as effectively as it processes the real thing.

    Maybe go see a nutritionist... they could probably provide some great insight into what you should be eating.

    Without double checking, I'm guessing that 160 lbs for 5'1" is still in the obese range (I know I was when I was 160lbs @ 4'11"). Your body is not in a healthy place right now, and sooner or later you'll feel the repercussions.

    Whatever you do, stick with it! You can do this!

    I hope this helps. Best of luck with your journey!
  • LillysGranny
    LillysGranny Posts: 431
    You may want to talk to your doctor and maybe get a referral to a dietitian. There are so many things that could be going on in your body that it would be hard for anyone to just guess, especially since it looks like you're doing everything right. If you do go to the doc, you should post anything that seems relevant since you are not alone in your stuckness!
  • alison2429
    alison2429 Posts: 236 Member
    Two things come to mind here.
    First of all, Lucky you, you have been able to maintain your weight, unlike so many of us who balloon right up again after some time of inactivity. Secondly, it might be worthwhile for you to consider changes in other measurements or even better fitness goals. I bet, with all that exercising you have been doing, you can maybe run further, faster, lift more weights, do more push ups, squats, throw bales, wrestle horses, pull out weeds, than ever before. Those are more important than some number on the scale.
    You said "I'm killing myself and not getting any results". Surely all that exercise is getting results (if nothing else than keeping your body in fine form, no matter how heavy). Not sure that the same simple number formula (height of X = ideal weight of Y) is meant to be true for all women or men, way too many body type, muscle mass density variations for that. Many super fit football players would otherwise be considered way overweight. You might also be exrcising too much?
    I was going to suggest to look at the types of food you eat (open Diary?) but you seem to know exactly what you are doing there.
    For all you know you might not be overweight, just supremely muscular superwoman (no wonder with that much workout, kids, etc on your plate):)

    You say it best WolfEarl!! WTG.
  • lottanorde
    lottanorde Posts: 25
    As a rule of thumb, 2000 calories a day for a woman are too much calories to loose weight. Generally, a woman should not eat more than 1500 calories a day in order to loose weight, and if most calories are gained from eating unprocessed foods, complex carbohydrates, fruit and vegetables, and protein, there should be results.

    I have a busy lifestyle with two kids, walk or bike ride to do all my errands, and work out 4x week for about 40 mins. I allow myself 1200 calories and log walking, cycling and workouts to allow myself extra calories. Even if I log the exercise, I try not to eat more than 1700 calories. I have lost 20pounds this way and it took me a year.
    Hope this help a bit. Good Luck! Add me as a friend if you like for supporting each other further!
  • JunkFoodJane
    JunkFoodJane Posts: 150 Member
    Catcrazy's comment that you are likely on maintenance calories at the moment makes sense.


    I can't see your diary, but I would recommend looking at getting 7 vegetable servings (full servings, even double of the same items if you can, I try to eat 2x steamed cauliflower for example) or more a day, and shooting for a lot of fiber.

    I've been stuck for a while- I was eating what should have been maintenance calories earlier in the year and lost some weight, then I started dipping my intake down a bit (when losing stopped) and adding exercise and gained gained gained. I started out aiming for 14 pounds loss and now have 21 or so to lose.

    BUT! This week I've been taking it easier on the exercise (more relaxed, 3mph walking) and eating a TON of food but ending the days under my calorie goals by ~500, including tons of grilled and steamed veggies, and I may finally be losing some weight. 3 pounds in a week! I'm not getting excited yet, because I really need to lose around 7 to feel like I'm succeeding. I'm also eating 40+ grams of fiber. 50 will really upset my stomach, I feel best at 40-45.

    I'm also filling my food diary ahead of time so that I know what I am going to eat and how many calories it comes out to. I may not always eat everything in the order I put it there- sometimes I take this or that from dinner and put it into lunch, or I leave my banana out of breakfast and have it as a snack- but it does help to say, 'I'm hungry' or even 'I feel snacky' and look at my list to see what I haven't eaten. Then I get to say, 'Oh, I need to eat that grapefruit!' and it helps me a lot.

    In fact, I think that's the biggest change I've made this week. Deciding to fill out my diary the night before. It definitely helps with overcoming weak moments!
  • littlemili
    littlemili Posts: 625 Member
    Losing weight is just a numbers game unless you have a physical issue which needs to be diagnosed and treated. Assuming that's not the case (and you should certainly check that out to be sure)...

    Either 2000 calories is more than you need
    Or you aren't trying new things for long enough
    Or you need to try different kinds of exercise that your body hasn't tried before

    I am also 5'1 and I only need to eat 1200 a day. I have a net intake of 800-1200 per day and am losing steadily at just over 1lb per week. 2000 calories is roughly maintenance mode for an average size woman. If you are short and trying to lose, the maths suggests you should be taking in considerably less. If you eat 1200 a day for 2 weeks and exercise moderately including cardio and strength, and don't lose weight, you should see a doctor as clearly something in your body isn't working quite 100%. We are all told 3500 calories = 1lb, so if you track yourself and there is no sign of this happening then you need to look at potential problems. But really, I think if you cut your calories back to a number around what everyone who is losing at your height consumes, you will find the scales start to move.
  • littlemili
    littlemili Posts: 625 Member
    Also you should get your body fat % measured. If you really do work out that much maybe you just have a lot of lean muscle mass and your body fat is healthy. In which case you don't need to lose weight. You can get it measured at any doctor surgery.
  • EmmaShorter
    EmmaShorter Posts: 298
    OK I am a little confused now. Say I don't exercise then I should eat 1200 calories. If I were to exercise and earn 900 calories taking my total calories to consume to 2100 cals. Now if I were to eat all of these back at 5 foot 5 would I most likely maintain? Do I need to only eat up to 1700 say?
  • vanfox23
    vanfox23 Posts: 110
    Thanks for the encouragement and suggestions. I do have a HRM and I manually log all my exercise. I'm doing P90X which is a pretty intense workout and is why I'm eating so much. I'm burning between 800 and 1000 calories a day and don't really want to back off of that because I am loving the way it makes me feel. I was eating 1200-1500 calories for most of that year and only recently upped it to1800- 2000 on other suggestions that I was in starvation mode. And yes, I can do things that I couldn't before. I've noticed other little changes. I mean I'm building muscle and that, eventually, will take over the fat right? I am lifting 12.5 lb dumbbells now up from the 5-7 range... I just don't understand why this isn't reflected on the scale. I don't have any food intolerances and only on one medication for BP at a very low dose. I can't afford to see a nutritionist, dietitian or personal trainer. So you all are all I have. I appreciate everyone of your responses and I'm glad to see I'm not alone. You all have brightened my day so thank you!
  • lnadeau66
    lnadeau66 Posts: 135 Member
    Sounds to me like you need a new scale! I wish I had the time, let alone the energy to work out like you do! :smile: Good for you!
  • afirecracker4
    afirecracker4 Posts: 5 Member
    I feel your pain. Yes I totally agree that 2000 calories is entirely too much. I am 4'11-1/2" and my weight ranges from 128 to 138 range since i hit 40 years old.

    When I was younger I could eat 2000 calories a day and exercise 3 hours a week high impact aerobics and maintain!!!!!!
    Now at 46 years if I eat 2000 calories a day you better believe I'd be gaining weight.

    Currently I exercise 4-5 days a week 1 hour each, am pretty active on off days, shopping running errands, my feet always hurt from so much walking. I am staying between 800-1200 calories a day and I have seen the scale go from 138 to 131.8 in three months. This is rediculous!!! In my thirties I'd be a rail working this hard.

    I am doing some serious weight training three days a week so hopefully I am losing more in size than weight, but I am still in a size 10 which is now getting a little loose. I started in a tight fitting size 10 in Feb.

    I am so close to throwing in the towel but I can see the fat coming off my legs!!!! I just need it to come off the mid section so I can go down a size in my clothes back to the 8's.

    Don't give up, I am amazed that there are 5' women in the world struggling like I am, please share your stories like what you do to maintain, exercise program, age etc. I do think something is wrong with me but I have gotten all numbers great on my physical, seen an endocrinologists and found I am a little insulin resistant. This makes me crave crave sugar, but that is under control i do still eat a little dove dark choc bites hear and there, but watching my cal's constantly!!!!!!!
  • vanfox23
    vanfox23 Posts: 110
    I have tried taking my calories down but when I do, I am starving....like wanting to eat my arm off starving. I'm just starting to wonder if it's all worth it, that's all. I'm working so hard but getting no where. It feels like I'm on a treadmill trying to run a marathon...
  • catcrazy
    catcrazy Posts: 1,740 Member
    Its definitely not easy if you're on limited calories but you learn to eat well. LOTS of vegetables, filling but very few calories. Lean protein, protein fills you for far longer. Avoid white bread, rice and pasta, theyre already heavily processed which means your body has little work to do to digest them...you will feel hungry very soon after eating processed foods.

    You must have a lot of patience to be still at it a year later so i'd suggest dropping to 1700, its not a huge drop but should allow for a half pound a week loss. Give it 8 weeks minimum. Keep boiled eggs on hand as snacks, the whites are only around 17 calories and pack a protein punch, be adventurous with veg. Broccoli, cauliflower and green beans are my favourite. boil, strain and toss them in olive oil seasoned with cayenne, garlic and black pepper. Strong cheese sprinkled on them works too (watch the amount of oil or cheese tho!)

    I can't say its fun, its not and I know its for life :grumble: so I make nothing off limits, if i want something I will build it in or work extra calories off. There is a chocolate cake sitting in front of me (cheers son!) i'm trying to decide whether a small slice is really worth an hour on the elliptical, i'm swaying towards no.

    I really do sympathise with you, I've been there but I only waited 4 months on calories before trying the next step down...I admire your staying power so please don't even think about quitting now
  • craftylatvian
    craftylatvian Posts: 599 Member
    vanfox, I sent you a friend request. I am the same way, but only after a little over a month.
  • LaJauna
    LaJauna Posts: 336 Member
    Have you considered doing a 10 day ketogenic diet to see how insulin resistant you are? If you can't lose on a Keto diet then you are hard core resistant and may need to lower your calories/carbs to a much lower level. I would also suggest cutting back on your exercise during the 10 day test. Let your body rest (not be in stress/cortisol overload!). Let me know if you are interested and I will send you a link for the diet.
  • lottanorde
    lottanorde Posts: 25
    Sounds like a good plan to me, it works for me at least.
  • littlemili
    littlemili Posts: 625 Member
    OK I am a little confused now. Say I don't exercise then I should eat 1200 calories. If I were to exercise and earn 900 calories taking my total calories to consume to 2100 cals. Now if I were to eat all of these back at 5 foot 5 would I most likely maintain? Do I need to only eat up to 1700 say?
    Personally, and I know this is against general advice here, when I eat more than 1400 total in a day I do not lose. Often I exercise 300-400 a day, sometimes up to 700, but I do not ever consume more than 1400. Sometimes I have a net of like 700-800 calories. I discovered that I need to work like this because I hit a plateau, tried eating more and re-gained, and then tried not eating back exercise calories and have started losing again. But like I say, I think probably it is a very individual thing, as in my first 8lb of weight loss I ate back my calories and lost. I guess the body changes as we lose. I would definitely start by eating back and then if things stop working, re-evaluate.
  • afirecracker4
    afirecracker4 Posts: 5 Member
    Perhaps when we eat back the calories it has to be fibrous vegetables, not carbohydrates?

    Many here talk about you have to eat so many calories to lose weight but my body does not respond if I do this. Probably because I'm insulin resistant and this is hereditary. My doc says I'm lucky I've managed to fight my weight like this my whole life and not be severely obese.

    Yes the high protein does curb the appetite. If your starving then you probably need a lot more protein in your macros. Being insulin resistant makes it even harder.

    I know its hard, but really try to limit the sugar!!!!!!! This will make your insulin levels spiral and bring hard cravings too.
    I've eliminated bread, pasta and potatoes from my diet years ago except for a few nibbles once in a while. Yes I do cheat but only when I've really earned it.

    My biggest problem is portion control. For this, I just train my mind to not eat food anymore. I eat for survival NOT pleasure.

    I just nibble my oatmeal, protein drink, popcorn chicken bites on the run, salad and grilled tuna or chicken, my calories end up between 800-1200 / day. I think of food specifically as a fuel for the body - not something I like or deprive myself from.

    Writing this makes it sound horrid, but that is where I'm at and it is depressing. If its the only thing works for me, then I'm determined to do it.

    It's nice to see I'm not the only one struggling with this. I really enjoy reading the tips some of you have written to get through this, because just when I'm burned out and bored with my routine, I get inspired with the seasoned green bean idea!!!!!!

    Thank you all for the input and keep writing!!!!!
  • BflSaberfan
    BflSaberfan Posts: 1,272
    I have tried taking my calories down but when I do, I am starving....like wanting to eat my arm off starving. I'm just starting to wonder if it's all worth it, that's all. I'm working so hard but getting no where. It feels like I'm on a treadmill trying to run a marathon...

    Onoce you cut your calories it definitely takes a while to get use to. The first 2-3 weeks are the worst but once your stomach gets "use" to not being so full you will not be as hungry.

    Considering you are pretty active I'd go with 1500 calories a day at the very most.
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