The moment it all hits you.

salad_bar
salad_bar Posts: 66 Member
edited November 12 in Motivation and Support
I suppose it's difficult to really realize how deep of a rut we are in when it's comfortable. The same motions, day in and day out. Yes, I've complained about being tired. Yes, I've complained about my pants not fitting. Haven't we all at some point? But those things seem to get sucked into other things we believe require more of our attention. Okay my pants don't fit and I'm feeling a little sluggish, but I had a bad day at work and my husband is making me angry and there's so much laundry to do and I have to cook and in that case I'm just going to come home and plop myself on the couch and drink some beers.

I used to be a go-getter. I used to expect more out of myself. I used to push myself and not settle for second best. Key words - "used to". Then I fell into that rut. Everything discouraged me. I lost interest in a lot of things. I lost my drive and passion. I constantly looked for reassurance to back up my excuses. For example, I found internet articles (yes, bogus internet articles) that reassured me I really didn't need to lift weights because a long walk would allow me to reach my goals. Or another one led me to believe by going gluten free, I would have no more sinus problems, I would lose weight and I would be HOT. Yes, I lost weight, but I looked like crap, I slept like crap, I was moody and irritable and I hated the taste of gluten free bread. Am I intolerant to gluten? No. Oh and by the way, the sinus problems are still there and it has absolutely nothing to do with gluten.

I looked for happiness in eating and drinking. Oh, and OTC sleep aids because I managed to screw my sleep up so much. Nah, exercise and healthier eating wouldn't help me sleep better. Furthermore, who wants to get up at 6:30 am every day and go to bed at a decent hour? Not me! I'm lazy, and that's okay! I'm a slouch, and that's acceptable! You know what would make me feel better? A damn beer! Or a whole day away from work just sleeping! Go for a run? No! Lift some weights? Pffft. I'm in my rut, I will complain every single day about being in this rut, but I'm just too comfortable and too lazy to do a thing about it.

Then today happened.

I cannot even put a number to how many times I've not wanted to do something because I'm lazy, or didn't feel like putting an effort into anything because I'm lazy. That all changed today. I was presented an opportunity to do something incredible. This has been something I've wanted to do for decades. Literally decades (I'm dating myself here lol). Back in the day when I first wanted to do this, I did every single thing I could to better my chances. I still did that up until about three years ago when everything started falling apart, I couldn't catch a break and I gave up on myself. I just didn't care. Too much crap being slung on me, too many external influences, giving up on myself, and comfortably sinking into a rut.

Today, I have to make a big decision. I have to decide whether or not I want to stay in this rut. If the answer is no, I need to realize that I need to push myself more, I need to reach out of my comfort zone. I need to stop being such a lazy slouch. There's no magic formula, it just has to be done. If I truly enjoy being lazy, and not meeting my potential, and living my life as-is, well, that decision has to be made too. Without a word of a doubt, I can honestly say I have not been giving 100% to my relationship, my physical health, my career, my life.

Today a decision has to be made.




Replies

  • SuggaD
    SuggaD Posts: 1,369 Member
    And the choice is an easy one. Just read your post back to yourself. Best of luck!
  • MsBeverleyH
    MsBeverleyH Posts: 99 Member
    Wishing you the best of luck out there. You've got this. B)
  • KCoolBeanz
    KCoolBeanz Posts: 813 Member
    Sounds like you've already made the right decision :)
  • salad_bar
    salad_bar Posts: 66 Member
    In my heart I've made the decision, but it's all still boggling around in my mind. It is hard to make changes, no matter how crummy the previous situation is.
  • lisabrezina1980
    lisabrezina1980 Posts: 60 Member
    I could have written that myself! I have been so down on myself for years for gaining so much weight. I have been heavy all my life with the exception of when I was in my mid 20's. I lost weight then because I didn't eat . low and behold 2 pregnancies and 3 babies later all that weight came back on even when I swore I wouldn't ever get back here.
    I went through Several phases, shame, accepetance, denial, and back around. Finally a moment of clarity hit.
    I don't have to starve and punish myself to look better to feel better. I can Make small changes in my eating habits, I can challenge myself to go for healthier options and make it fun.
    Oh and those people in the gym? Those blessed skinny fit people? That I assumed were born that way? Maybe some of them were I don't know but...well why can't I be one of "them?" Instead of living in my head I started living! A few days in the gym, taking my kids outside to play or for a long walk and I feel great.
    Anyway, 3 or 4 weeks in and I'm down 12 pounds. Not a lot for where I'm starting but hey its 12 pounds less than I was a few weeks ago and I'm not starving. I'm moving. I'm learning.
    You can do this. I can do this. Good luck.
  • palwithme
    palwithme Posts: 860 Member
    Sounds like your lucky day. :D
  • savinoca
    savinoca Posts: 30
    salad_bar wrote: »
    In my heart I've made the decision, but it's all still boggling around in my mind. It is hard to make changes, no matter how crummy the previous situation is.

    For me I only started getting motivated once my weight started manifesting into health issues. That was enough to "scare" me into being serious about losing weight and getting fit.

    Don't be like that - get control now while you recognize the problem and before all the "scary" stuff starts happening. You can do it!!
  • ewhip17
    ewhip17 Posts: 515 Member
    Good for you. Just one little action every day will add up to big change overall. You absolutely have the power and ability to change your entire life. I'm excited for you and I'm looking forward to updates. :smile:
  • salad_bar
    salad_bar Posts: 66 Member
    Thanks for the support. When you really take a step back, transformation of any kind and change of any kind involves every aspect of your life. Big changes, small changes. Even losing 5 lb can make a huge impact on someone's life.
  • toofatnomore
    toofatnomore Posts: 206 Member
    Your post made me want to do something....and I am already fairly motivated. Go after it and don't look back.
  • uptownplum
    uptownplum Posts: 42 Member
    This motivaed me. Good luck to you. :flowerforyou:
  • savinoca
    savinoca Posts: 30
    salad_bar wrote: »
    Thanks for the support. When you really take a step back, transformation of any kind and change of any kind involves every aspect of your life. Big changes, small changes. Even losing 5 lb can make a huge impact on someone's life.

    Just take it in small steps and don't try to do too much at once or change things to drastically. For example, I wouldn't recommend exercising 7 days per week now or anything like that if you've been going 0. Try for 1 or 2 days a week. Then once that becomes routine, try to beat that. Etc.

    Same with the diet. Do your best but don't beat yourself up if in the beginning you go a little over the cals or have a few bad days. You may have to ease yourself into the mindset and the lifestyle change.

    That's how it was for me, anyway - I can't speak for everyone :)

    Like you said, even losing just 5 pounds can change your entire outlook and make you feel great. I also try to set goals that don't revolve around weight, which is what I love about exercise so much. For example, being able to go from jogging for 1 minute in a row to 2 minutes in a row. Or being able to increase weights when lifting. Or anything tangible that does not completely tie my motivation to a scale, because trust me, some days that scale will just be a huge jerk!
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
    On a sub-subject - do you neti? It sounds crazy but it works really well as long as you don't have polyps or anything that requires surgery.
  • salad_bar
    salad_bar Posts: 66 Member
    sofaking6 wrote: »
    On a sub-subject - do you neti? It sounds crazy but it works really well as long as you don't have polyps or anything that requires surgery.

    I do, but I forget half the time. Again, consistent routine and not being too lazy to do something.
  • megganjeninngs69
    megganjeninngs69 Posts: 51 Member
    I wish u all the luck
  • megganjeninngs69
    megganjeninngs69 Posts: 51 Member
    Yr post made me feel not so alone☺
  • trying4real
    trying4real Posts: 113 Member
    toofatnomore wrote: »
    Go after it and don't look back.

    this
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
    salad_bar wrote: »
    sofaking6 wrote: »
    On a sub-subject - do you neti? It sounds crazy but it works really well as long as you don't have polyps or anything that requires surgery.

    I do, but I forget half the time. Again, consistent routine and not being too lazy to do something.


    Well, I forget a lot as well (I haven't even restocked my saline in a month at least) and I get up at 4:30am every weekday to work out. Nobody is all one thing (lazy) or another thing (perfect).

    It sounds like maybe you lost your zest for living. One thing I've found is that being in a rut can cause you to feel like being in a rut. Because it's boring and depressing and saps you of motivation. It's a vicious circle. One little step out of it could make all the difference if it reminds you why you used to go after life with a passion. Take one little step and there's all the likelihood in the world that the rest of the steps won't be hard at all.

  • salad_bar
    salad_bar Posts: 66 Member
    sofaking6 wrote: »
    salad_bar wrote: »
    sofaking6 wrote: »
    On a sub-subject - do you neti? It sounds crazy but it works really well as long as you don't have polyps or anything that requires surgery.

    I do, but I forget half the time. Again, consistent routine and not being too lazy to do something.


    Well, I forget a lot as well (I haven't even restocked my saline in a month at least) and I get up at 4:30am every weekday to work out. Nobody is all one thing (lazy) or another thing (perfect).

    It sounds like maybe you lost your zest for living. One thing I've found is that being in a rut can cause you to feel like being in a rut. Because it's boring and depressing and saps you of motivation. It's a vicious circle. One little step out of it could make all the difference if it reminds you why you used to go after life with a passion. Take one little step and there's all the likelihood in the world that the rest of the steps won't be hard at all.

    So incredibly true.
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