Are good deeds valueless if bragged about?
if you do a good deed but then you tell everyone that you did it, do you feel that it negates/diminishes the deed to some measure? I have always believed that it has. It's no longer a good deed if you seek recognition to boost your ego. A true good deed should not be bragged about.
What are your thoughts?
What are your thoughts?
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I agree, and unfortunately know alot of people like this. A good deed is something you do for others, not for yourself. If you seek validation and praise for doing something out of the goodness of your heart, then it really isn't out of the goodness of your heart is it?0
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Agree!0
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Not when someone asks you what you've done lately, to inspire others to do something nice.0
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while fishing a pond in a public park for a weekends in a row, I noticed the same 2 kids (about 8 and 10) get dropped off in the mid morning then picked up again in late afternoon.
I taught them about what I was fishing for and how to do it. I gave them some tackle.
After a few weeks one of the boys asked me a question that still brings tears to my eyes. "Why are you so nice to me?".
Literally teared up typing that.0 -
The deed holds value to someone. You don't negate that by talking about it. If you save someone from choking then "brag" about it you still saved their life. How you feel about asking for a pat on the back is up to you.0
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if you do a good deed but then you tell everyone that you did it, do you feel that it negates/diminishes the deed to some measure? I have always believed that it has. It's no longer a good deed if you seek recognition to boost your ego. A true good deed should not be bragged about.
What are your thoughts?
I agree. To me, this is like George Costanza going to great lengths to make sure the employee sees him putting money in the tip jar. I mean, it's still a tip, but you're just trying to get the credit.0 -
“The true test of a man’s character is what he does when no one is watching.” - John Wooden0
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Sounds familiar:
Take heed that you do not your justice before men, to be seen by them: otherwise you shall not have a reward of your Father who is in heaven. Therefore when thou dost an almsdeed, sound not a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be honoured by men. Amen I say to you, they have received their reward.0 -
Those young boys who received the good deed and benefited from his experience may always remember fondly what he did for them. So, the good deed will never be tarnished in their eyes. _John_ might brag to his friends how he changed the lives of some boys. And his friends may not see the good deed in that same light. So, the answer like so many answers to questions in this world is, "It depends".......0
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Here's what it comes down to. Nobody ever does a good deed without getting something in return. Now, hear me out. I know that the most respectable thing to do is do nice things without wanting anything in return. BUT, try to think of any good deed ever and why a person does it. A person will conduct a good deed to get either recognition, a specific feeling, specific fulfillment, or a feeling of societal contribution in return. Nobody would perform good deeds if they didn't benefit themselves in some way. That's not to sound selfish, but that's how human beings are driven to do anything.0
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I guess it depends on whether the person is bragging or just stating they did something good.
I don't think it diminishes the goodness of the deed's outcome since it affected somebody in a positive manner, but outlandish and excessive bragging about it certainly shows the deed was performed with less than noble intentions and the deed was done for recognition and approval by others.
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It does not diminish the deed at all. If we are really honest, you get the warm fuzzy internally whether or not you speak of it - which is a big driving force in doing the deed in the first place. We do these things as much to enrich our own lives as the lives of others.0
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It does not diminish the deed at all. If we are really honest, you get the warm fuzzy internally whether or not you speak of it - which is a big driving force in doing the deed in the first place. We do these things as much to enrich our own lives as the lives of others.
True you get a warm fuzzy internally, but bragging about the deed to obtain recognition from others for doing it is what I am getting at.
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Doing a good deed and bragging about it is better than not doing a good deed at all.0
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It does not diminish the deed at all. If we are really honest, you get the warm fuzzy internally whether or not you speak of it - which is a big driving force in doing the deed in the first place. We do these things as much to enrich our own lives as the lives of others.
Agreed. And I agree with OGJake. Good Deeds and Charity are inherently selfish acts. We do it because in the end, it makes us feel better about ourselves.0 -
Here's what it comes down to. Nobody ever does a good deed without getting something in return. Now, hear me out. I know that the most respectable thing to do is do nice things without wanting anything in return. BUT, try to think of any good deed ever and why a person does it. A person will conduct a good deed to get either recognition, a specific feeling, specific fulfillment, or a feeling of societal contribution in return. Nobody would perform good deeds if they didn't benefit themselves in some way. That's not to sound selfish, but that's how human beings are driven to do anything.
I feel a challenge! I'm going to test your theory and see if I can do a good deed without getting ANYTHING in return. Of course I will not be able to share the results of this test as that would immediately result in recognition . . . .0 -
And also if it makes you feel good to do it, and that's why you did it, that can also be argued as "selfish". And if you do something to benefit someone that makes you feel less than good or even badly, one could still argue the selfishness of it because you're doing it to prove to yourself that you're a good person, that is, personal validation.Here's what it comes down to. Nobody ever does a good deed without getting something in return. Now, hear me out. I know that the most respectable thing to do is do nice things without wanting anything in return. BUT, try to think of any good deed ever and why a person does it. A person will conduct a good deed to get either recognition, a specific feeling, specific fulfillment, or a feeling of societal contribution in return. Nobody would perform good deeds if they didn't benefit themselves in some way. That's not to sound selfish, but that's how human beings are driven to do anything.
I feel a challenge! I'm going to test your theory and see if I can do a good deed without getting ANYTHING in return. Of course I will not be able to share the results of this test as that would immediately result in recognition . . . .
No good deed goes unpunished, as it were.0 -
Here's what it comes down to. Nobody ever does a good deed without getting something in return. Now, hear me out. I know that the most respectable thing to do is do nice things without wanting anything in return. BUT, try to think of any good deed ever and why a person does it. A person will conduct a good deed to get either recognition, a specific feeling, specific fulfillment, or a feeling of societal contribution in return. Nobody would perform good deeds if they didn't benefit themselves in some way. That's not to sound selfish, but that's how human beings are driven to do anything.
I feel a challenge! I'm going to test your theory and see if I can do a good deed without getting ANYTHING in return. Of course I will not be able to share the results of this test as that would immediately result in recognition . . . .
Right and you also would not be able to even feel good about it. Because that would make it possible that you may have done so to get a good feeling in return. ALSO, you'd be doing this to prove a theory right or wrong. Meaning you'd get a result out of it.0 -
halobender wrote: »
And also if it makes you feel good to do it, and that's why you did it, that can also be argued as "selfish". And if you do something to benefit someone that makes you feel less than good or even badly, one could still argue the selfishness of it because you're doing it to prove to yourself that you're a good person, that is, personal validation.Here's what it comes down to. Nobody ever does a good deed without getting something in return. Now, hear me out. I know that the most respectable thing to do is do nice things without wanting anything in return. BUT, try to think of any good deed ever and why a person does it. A person will conduct a good deed to get either recognition, a specific feeling, specific fulfillment, or a feeling of societal contribution in return. Nobody would perform good deeds if they didn't benefit themselves in some way. That's not to sound selfish, but that's how human beings are driven to do anything.
I feel a challenge! I'm going to test your theory and see if I can do a good deed without getting ANYTHING in return. Of course I will not be able to share the results of this test as that would immediately result in recognition . . . .
No good deed goes unpunished, as it were.
Exactly my point. Well put.0 -
Agree. If you do a good deed, it's not for the recognition. Or shouldn't be, anyways.0
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Sounds familiar:
Take heed that you do not your justice before men, to be seen by them: otherwise you shall not have a reward of your Father who is in heaven. Therefore when thou dost an almsdeed, sound not a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be honoured by men. Amen I say to you, they have received their reward.
This....0 -
BusyRaeNOTBusty wrote: »Doing a good deed and bragging about it is better than not doing a good deed at all.
Yes....and the deed is still good for the receiver0 -
I am inspired by this website. http://ilikegiving.com/ It made me think out of the box and try living a more generous life.0
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while fishing a pond in a public park for a weekends in a row, I noticed the same 2 kids (about 8 and 10) get dropped off in the mid morning then picked up again in late afternoon.
I taught them about what I was fishing for and how to do it. I gave them some tackle.
After a few weeks one of the boys asked me a question that still brings tears to my eyes. "Why are you so nice to me?".
Literally teared up typing that.
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Share your story on this website http://ilikegiving.com/
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I think that if the deed is used as an example of your character there's no harm. context is important. like if I was walking down the street and gifted a panhandler then got back to work and ran around telling everyone I gave a panhandler some money... so what...
I was fortunate enough to buy a Gas powered "shovel" so... when there's a heavy snowfall.. I cart it out and "shovel" about 2 blocks... I say nothing to anyone about it... BUT one day... a neighbor left an extension cord across the sidewalk... and I tore it in half... my good deed cost me $75 bucks... and I even asked the dude... can I repair it or would you like it replaced... he opted for the replacement... so.. he's the one guy in a two block radius that has to shovel his own walk now...0 -
personally I don't believe there is such a thing as an unselfish good deed. by carting my shovel around I am doing it for the exercise... that someone benefits is an added bonus.0
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Am I less fit for having done an end-goal photoshoot and posting the pictures online to showcase them?0
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I don't think it devalues the deed itself, but the person who did the deed.0
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while fishing a pond in a public park for a weekends in a row, I noticed the same 2 kids (about 8 and 10) get dropped off in the mid morning then picked up again in late afternoon.
I taught them about what I was fishing for and how to do it. I gave them some tackle.
After a few weeks one of the boys asked me a question that still brings tears to my eyes. "Why are you so nice to me?".
Literally teared up typing that.
I literally teared up reading it.
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