why aren't they happy for me?

I understand you dont want to make them feel secure, but if they are going to say things like that then you need to worry about you. You have to do it for you, try and let her comments roll of your shoulders and just show them that even with negative comments it's cane be done!

Don't let it get to you. My brother always says stuff like, "You need to eat a sandwich, with extra mayo!" It's up to her to make the decision to get healthy. You made the right one and she is just jealous.

Good question! I think a lot of people go through this unfortunately. Here's my experience:

http://gettingitbacktogether.blogspot.com/2009/12/that-was-short-lived.html

Check out the comments on the post. They definitely made me feel a lot better!

While it is true that the fuller face helps creases out wrinkles, who wants to hear that stereotypical compliment of "You've got such a pretty face" with the unstated "Unfortunately, you are way overweight!" Diabetes doesn't make you or keep you fat and I know cuz I am a T2. You are a reality check for your step-mother. Take it as a compliment and know you are pretty inside and out....and a lot healthier as well!

Its hard to say exactly what her (their) issues may be...she may feel food was a bond, like a connection for the two of you. Even so, Congratts, you're doing a wonderful job with your program! Go gettum! Please continue to be my inspiration, I'm just starting my weight loss journey and I'm working our almost everyday - so with just what I've started with, I even feel much better! My goal is to loose 50 lbs...I want to feel sexy to me, oh what a journey.... Thanks for your story! Keep up the good work!

(she's very obese and blames it on her diabetes)

.

She should be blaming her diabetes on her obesity!

People are just jealous. Your success is shining a light on their insecurities.

Let the comments roll right off and know from where they are coming (their insecurities, not their love). You're doing GREAT and you know that a healthier body is way more beautiful and sexier than some fluffed up wrinkles any day

My, how supportive...:sick:

She should blame her diabetes on her obesity.

EDIT: efconroy, doobabe, and me - simultaneous thoughts. High 5!

You are BEAUTIFUL!!! Let no one tell you otherwise

you know its kinda sad. it was a petty comment made in haste as she realized just how beautiful AND healthy you now are. OF course she started to backpeddle the moment she realized what came outta her mouth.

when we hate ourselves, when we are filled with misery we tend to hate on those who have fought to not be like us. that's what she did.

There's no excuse.

But!!! let the haters hate girl. you know you're doin something right when you have petty hate and jealousy poppin outta the woodwork and the next time she says something be kind and offer to help her lose the weight that will probably take her down.

YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!!

I agree with others, that people that say things like that are insecure. Have you ever heard these comments? "Don't you think you should stop trying to lose more weight, you're starting to look gaunt! Or if you get sick, the first thing people say is," You're getting sick, because you lost all that weight. Your cheeks are starting to fall in on your face."
I too have heard them all, but In my mind all I can picture is me carrying around all day long "30 pounds of potatoes" -the weight I have lost so far. Hopefully that weight loss will continue like yours has.
Congratulations on your weight loss! What a great accomplishment!

It is a common misconception, even among uninformed doctors, that obesity causes diabetes. Newer, more in-depth studies tell a different story. In fact, diabetes can cause weight gain long before a diagnosis can be made and diabetes is genetic. You don't get it from being fat. There are more than 36 genes currently recognized as causing diabetes. The more of those you have, the worse it is for you. And it is MUCH harder to lose weight with diabetes.

That aside, her comment was hurtful and inappropriate. I'm glad you've been able to get past it and not judge her for her bad behavior. Good for you! Keep up the good work!

I'm so sorry you're subject to that sort of nasty behavior. It's true what they say: misery loves company. My mother is the same way - she sees my successes in life as a magnifying glass for her shortcomings and used to passive aggressively berate me out of jealousy. Her malice drove a wedge into our relationship that exists to this day. It got so bad that I couldn't tell her anything that was going on in my life for fear it would incite a backlash. For example, when I told her I was taking a trip to London to work in shelter for battered women, she'd say, "I wish you would stop bragging about your travels. Don't you think I wish I could travel too?" She completely ignored the part about battered women.

A few years ago I made the decision to excise people from my life who are incapable of being positive. Life is too short to wallow in regret, failure and self-sabotage. I'm here to be happy, and to create a better world for myself and those around me. Hang in there...it gets easier dealing with people who love seeing others fail. Hopefully she'll come to her senses and use you as a source of inspiration and strength to reach her own goals.

People like us to stay the same. If we are successful and bettering ourselves, they don't want to hear about our success. It means if they aren't doing it, then they are lazy failures. It makes them feel bad when we do good. Thats what I get. I have to learn to shut up about my success except on MFP!

My Mom and Brother and Sister, when I lost a lot of weight before, had never seen anyone in the family that skinny. They thought I was unhealthy, too. Anorexic they said. Not too anorexic to turn a college guy's head at 35 yrs old, though.