This just sucks

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fightingoldbadhabits
fightingoldbadhabits Posts: 14 Member
in Introduce Yourself
OK, here's the abridged version of my struggles with food/weight:

- very athletic through high school including scholarship offer for college
- typical eat/drink way through college and gain 25 pounds
- Surgery gets me back to goal weight of 220 and I maintain for about 5 years
- Meet wife, settle down, new job with lots of opportunity - all my effort goes to work
- Quickly surge 30 more pounds with a top-off weight of 283
- Got some of it off over time, and in 2003 I lose 50 pounds and maintain my goal weight of 220 for about 3 years
- Bad business deal, family stresses collapses that effort and back to old, bad habits - now with anti-depressants and anti-anxiety drugs. This makes it harder to keep pounds off.
- Since 2005 the lowest I could get to was 255, not low enough.
- Develop pre-Diabetes - on medications to help
- Bad year, especially bad last few months, and I've gained almost 20 back to 270+
- STUCK - snowball to hell mode right now, disgusted, no hope, struggling in job to keep it interesting and engaged, need to get a change in momentum
- Picture my daughter took of me over the weekend freakin' grossed me out and led me to reach out to this community for help.

Where do I even start again to get any confidence and momentum that I can do this?
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Replies

  • poohpoohpeapod
    poohpoohpeapod Posts: 776 Member
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    there is only one answer..start. start whether you feel like it or not. make a calorie deficit plan, follow it every day. The days will add up, the pounds will go down. Everyone with any weight to lose has to start where you are now. There is no perfect moment in time, there is only now. Do it even if you do not want to.It IS hard, your future self will thank you. It is easier than a massive coronary or stroke. you can add me if you need/want a supportive friend.
  • poohpoohpeapod
    poohpoohpeapod Posts: 776 Member
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    PS...you do not have to feel motivated to start. The motivation will build.
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
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    You said you are trying to make your job interesting and stay/get engaged - the same thing for getting in shape. It also sounds like you're a stress-gainer, so I recommend exercise for the anxiety relief and also the positive reinforcement that can act as your motivation. What do you like to do? There are so many ways to be active - phone apps, youtube videos, Kinect/wii workouts etc. What do you think might be fun for you?
  • mathandcats
    mathandcats Posts: 786 Member
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    I think motivation is fleeting and it's not what you need. What you need to succeed is resolve and determination. Figure out a plan and stick to it - include room for real life to happen (e.g. treats, special occasions), and don't go overboard with eating too little or working out an unsustainable amount. Be patient and consistent and you'll get there.
  • fightingoldbadhabits
    fightingoldbadhabits Posts: 14 Member
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    To all of you who replied - Thank You - it's meant more to me than you'll know. I DO know how to do this, but just can't seem to string together enough "wins" to make the weight drop and then get really motivated. You all are right about doing it even when I don't feel like it - that's a huge issue with me. I feel like I "deserve" to eat whatever I want when I feel like it - but that's gotten me to the state I'm in today.

    I would love to have you all as friends on here, and hopefully I can help you too on your journey (I really actually do know this stuff....).
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    It's easier to focus on developing new positive habits than it is to fight the old ones.
  • PlunderingSteelGorilla
    PlunderingSteelGorilla Posts: 207 Member
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    You sound a hell of a lot like me, except I have not yet met my goal weight. Ever. Time is now.
  • fightingoldbadhabits
    fightingoldbadhabits Posts: 14 Member
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    The time is now, so I think I'll go to the gym on this cold day. Hope you all are having a good day. It's just a matter of creating a calorie deficit...
  • 1_meatball
    1_meatball Posts: 21 Member
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    usmcmp wrote: »
    It's easier to focus on developing new positive habits than it is to fight the old ones.
    I love this
  • 1_meatball
    1_meatball Posts: 21 Member
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    fightingoldbadhabits wrote: »
    The time is now, so I think I'll go to the gym on this cold day. Hope you all are having a good day. It's just a matter of creating a calorie deficit...

    Buy a fitbit , park your car furthest on works car park. Your activity is then tracked. You got 5000 steps, push it to 6000. There's no great secret to it. More cals burnt than eaten = weight loss. Good luck , you just need to believe in yourself
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    Would it be consolation to consider that I started nineteen months ago where you are now, and I've dropped ninety pounds? I had a lot of help along the way; an entire team of specialists and bariatric surgery. It started with a decision. I was not convinced this would work until I lost my first thirty pounds and started to experience some mobility gains. Since then I haven't looked back. My diabetes is in remission BTW.

    You're looking back. As hard as it is to see now, you can have a different sort of future.
  • cdlee05
    cdlee05 Posts: 718 Member
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    Decide what you want to do and who you want to be. That's the first place to start and it's the easiest part. The rest is a challenge.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
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    usmcmp wrote: »
    It's easier to focus on developing new positive habits than it is to fight the old ones.

    Listen to her.
  • fightingoldbadhabits
    fightingoldbadhabits Posts: 14 Member
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    So much great advice and support here - I really cannot tell you all what it means, especially just getting started. When I lost 50 pounds 10 years ago I had a lot of online support through Weight Watchers online groups. It was a key part then, and I'm hoping with your help it will be a major factor in staying on this journey.

    I had a good workout last night, but as is usual I did not sleep well. Felt really good to be back in the gym and I'm looking forward to going back tonight.

    As it gets warmer here I'll get back on my bike - My Goal: complete a 100k ride in August. Last year I did a sprint triathalon and found that having a training goal helps (although I really did not lose the weight I need to).

    A trainer once told me that weight loss is 90% what you put in your mouth. With each other's support we can make consistently better choices, and get back on the horse when we fall.

    Thanks again
  • poohpoohpeapod
    poohpoohpeapod Posts: 776 Member
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    The trainer is correct..abs are made in the kitchen is the saying, and it is true.
  • fightingoldbadhabits
    fightingoldbadhabits Posts: 14 Member
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    Yup, I believe it. I had a great day going, and kinda blew it last night - I was over by about 300 cals. Was ridiculously hungry all day - probably due to new eating style and working out. Still way better than I've done in a long time, so live and learn, back to the gym today.
  • fightingoldbadhabits
    fightingoldbadhabits Posts: 14 Member
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    Can anyone tell me if I can reply to all your awesome comments on the computer vs. on my phone app? I cannot see the messages on the computer, and it just makes it easier to reply with a real keyboard.

    But there were some great comments, thank you all for the support so far! It is truly what I need.

    Hoping you all have a great day!
  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,578 Member
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    Yes you can see and do this on the phone

  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,578 Member
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    barneygood wrote: »
    I think motivation is fleeting and it's not what you need. What you need to succeed is resolve and determination. Figure out a plan and stick to it - include room for real life to happen (e.g. treats, special occasions), and don't go overboard with eating too little or working out an unsustainable amount. Be patient and consistent and you'll get there.

    Yes!!!

  • fightingoldbadhabits
    fightingoldbadhabits Posts: 14 Member
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    Another "help me please" question. OK, I've had a pretty good start this week. Generally calories are in check, getting to workout. But I also travel for work a lot and I've got a 4 day convention coming up next week.

    #1 - I cannot exercise in the early AM, just does not work for me
    #2 - My schedule is not always my own. There are a lot demands of travel, limited healthy
    food choices (that I like and are satisfying), and generally I get worn down and that's
    when I begin binges, or at least eating a lot more than I need.
    #3 - Taking clients to nice dinners is soooo tempting. So much good stuff.
    #4 - Late nights at bar (I'm not a huge drinker), but it's a great place to socialize and the
    main thing is I get overly worn out - and head for the vending machines to get a
    Bear's Claw and Little Debbie donuts or something... Big problem for me.
    #5 - I think I'll be able to build in some time to workout through the day

    But in general, does anyone have really good advice from the road? I'm gong to try and control my schedule and take care of me, but as you all know the best laid plans....

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