why aren't they happy for me?

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  • karatsd
    karatsd Posts: 35
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    yes, the more diabetes has taken over your body, the harder it is to fight back with such a weak body in a lot of pain! ok ALL THANKS FOR THE ENCOURAGEMENT. Now, let's stop talking about my loved ones ( i know i started it) and move on to some serious MOTIVATION and Love!
  • karatsd
    karatsd Posts: 35
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    The bond that food had provided for so many people is pretty strong indeed.
  • MaryBachert
    MaryBachert Posts: 66 Member
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    I agree with others, that people that say things like that are insecure. Have you ever heard these comments? "Don't you think you should stop trying to lose more weight, you're starting to look gaunt! Or if you get sick, the first thing people say is," You're getting sick, because you lost all that weight. Your cheeks are starting to fall in on your face."
    I too have heard them all, but In my mind all I can picture is me carrying around all day long "30 pounds of potatoes" -the weight I have lost so far. Hopefully that weight loss will continue like yours has.
    Congratulations on your weight loss! What a great accomplishment!
  • rwillard78
    rwillard78 Posts: 19
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    It seems like when you make a change like this, many people have negative things to say about it. Just remember you are doing this for you, not for them! Secondly, I get irritated because I even had someone tell me they were concerned for me. Well, they weren't concerned for me when I was super heavy. They should have been more concerned then! :) As long as you're doing everythign the right way and are making a change for the better, don't worry about people.
  • Lexie71
    Lexie71 Posts: 144 Member
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    It is a common misconception, even among uninformed doctors, that obesity causes diabetes. Newer, more in-depth studies tell a different story. In fact, diabetes can cause weight gain long before a diagnosis can be made and diabetes is genetic. You don't get it from being fat. There are more than 36 genes currently recognized as causing diabetes. The more of those you have, the worse it is for you. And it is MUCH harder to lose weight with diabetes.

    That aside, her comment was hurtful and inappropriate. I'm glad you've been able to get past it and not judge her for her bad behavior. Good for you! Keep up the good work!
  • LadyE60
    LadyE60 Posts: 1
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    Sometimes the truth is simply painful. All of my life I have been accustomed to eating the wrong foods. All of the "GOOD FOODS" that got me to the point of T2. The truth of the matter is your weight loss is causing your mom to check herself. She knows what she has to do, but like so many others, she doesn't know where to start. I thank God that my daughters stuck with me, encouraging me, inspiring me, and helping me. Now it's not so hard to give up the foods that were killing me. I WANT to eat the right things. Continue to encourage your mom. Maybe take by some of the different dishes that you cooked and let her try them. Eventually she will re-evaluate her life or death situation and choose life.:happy:
  • Writer10
    Writer10 Posts: 8
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    I'm so sorry you're subject to that sort of nasty behavior. It's true what they say: misery loves company. My mother is the same way - she sees my successes in life as a magnifying glass for her shortcomings and used to passive aggressively berate me out of jealousy. Her malice drove a wedge into our relationship that exists to this day. It got so bad that I couldn't tell her anything that was going on in my life for fear it would incite a backlash. For example, when I told her I was taking a trip to London to work in shelter for battered women, she'd say, "I wish you would stop bragging about your travels. Don't you think I wish I could travel too?" She completely ignored the part about battered women.

    A few years ago I made the decision to excise people from my life who are incapable of being positive. Life is too short to wallow in regret, failure and self-sabotage. I'm here to be happy, and to create a better world for myself and those around me. Hang in there...it gets easier dealing with people who love seeing others fail. Hopefully she'll come to her senses and use you as a source of inspiration and strength to reach her own goals.
  • peteyTwang
    peteyTwang Posts: 250
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    that sucks -- but as you can see you're not alone! here's a great F2F podcast on the subject:

    http://www.fat2fitradio.com/2011/04/fat-2-fit-124-raised-to-be-overweight/
  • NatalieWinning
    NatalieWinning Posts: 999 Member
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    People like us to stay the same. If we are successful and bettering ourselves, they don't want to hear about our success. It means if they aren't doing it, then they are lazy failures. It makes them feel bad when we do good. Thats what I get. I have to learn to shut up about my success except on MFP!

    My Mom and Brother and Sister, when I lost a lot of weight before, had never seen anyone in the family that skinny. They thought I was unhealthy, too. Anorexic they said. Not too anorexic to turn a college guy's head at 35 yrs old, though.
  • HaleyAlli
    HaleyAlli Posts: 911 Member
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    Wow... That is pretty darn rude...
  • 2bFitNTrim
    2bFitNTrim Posts: 1,209 Member
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    I'm pushing 50 myself, and have a few lines to show for it. Thing is, I'd rather have the lines on my face then extra weight that would make me unhealthy. Or prematurely dead, in which case, the wrinkles would no longer matter :tongue:

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