I've tried everything. ..now what.

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amandaallenwest
amandaallenwest Posts: 7
in Motivation and Support
After I had my first child I joined a gym, ate healthy and lots more weight than I thought possible. After my second I lost most but not all and became pregnant with my 3rd and had horrible time loosing the weight. I've lost the weight but I cant seem to get to where I want to be. I have done everything "they" say you should do. I lift weights, I do cardio, I eat lean meats, veggies, fruits, drink water etc. I cut out sugar, carbs, fats you name it and I can't get weight around my middle (belly, love handles, thighs) to come down anymore. I know I'm obsessed. I absolutely hate to see myself in a mirror. I have honestly done and am doing all I know I can do to achieve this goal but my body will not respond. It's been a year now and not one inch has come off my waist. I'm at a loss. I've got 15lbs to loose to meet my goal and the scale won't budge. My self esteem is at an all time low. I set goals and expect to meet them, but this time I don't know what else to do.
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Replies

  • jacuspator
    jacuspator Posts: 7 Member
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    cut fruit down to one serving a day... that might help.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    You can eat 'healthy' until you are blue in the face, but in terms of weight loss, it has little to do with it. You don't have to cut foods out or exercise to extremes. All you need to lose weight, is a calorie deficit. Which means to eat less calories than your body burns. If you are not losing weight, then you are not in a deficit.

    How many calories are you eating? How many should you be eating in order to have a deficit? Do you log your food on MFP everyday? Do you weigh your food?

    These are the things you need to look at.
  • amandaallenwest
    amandaallenwest Posts: 7
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    Yes, I stay below what the app says I should by not eating more than I burn per day. I'm active. I've had blood work done to rule out thyroid issues. I eat the right amount of calories/carbs for the workout my trainer gives. She's stumped too.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    Are you weighing your food?
  • amandaallenwest
    amandaallenwest Posts: 7
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    You know, I had a scale but when we moved I packed it in a box with a few other thi gs and I've never found that box. It's been 18 months so I guess I should give up....I know I don't eat as much as I should sometimes. I stay home with my 3 kids and I'm far busier now than I was when I worked full time and find myself starving by 4pm realizing I hadn't eaten since breakfast.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,709 Member
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    How's your sleep and stress? Definite factors in weight loss.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • jenncornelsen
    jenncornelsen Posts: 969 Member
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    Is it just your stomach thats an issue? Dou have loose skin from pregnancies? Did ur stomach muscles seperate? (From ur pregnancy)
  • blankiefinder
    blankiefinder Posts: 3,599 Member
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    Have you read this post stickied at the top of the General Diet and Weight Loss Forum?

    So You Want a Nice Stomach
  • MKEgal
    MKEgal Posts: 3,250 Member
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    amandaallenwest wrote:
    I stay below what the app says I should by not eating more than I burn per day.
    Ignore exercise/net calories (most of the time).
    Figure out a healthy goal weight (middle of the healthy range on a BMI chart) and eat to maintain that weight. You'll slowly get there.

    This calculator will tell you not only your BMI, but how many servings of various foods to eat to maintain that weight.
    https://www.bcm.edu/cnrc-apps/healthyeatingcalculator/eatingCal.html

    You do not need to cut out any food or food group, just have less of the less healthy things and more of the more healthy things.
    .
    I eat the right amount of calories/carbs for the workout my trainer gives. She's stumped too.
    What is her certification to be advising you on nutrition?

    Here's a post I did about realistic goal setting (weight, calories, macros). It includes links to reliable resources (including the 2 I've linked here).

    Here's a table explaining the macros, from the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition.
    http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/88/1/1/T1.expansion.html
  • MKEgal
    MKEgal Posts: 3,250 Member
    edited February 2015
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    It could just be that you're already at a healthy weight & expecting to lose 15 lb more isn't realistic.
    And if you can, you can't decide where that weight will come from.
    But having your weight yo-yo, whether from variations in eating or from pregnancy, makes it harder to lose the weight each time.
    What you can do is tone & strengthen the underlying muscles, which it sounds like you're working on.

    If you're eating at a slight deficit (ignore exercise calories) you will lose weight.
    If you're not losing weight, you're either at maintenance or a surplus.


    Two things you can try which have been linked to losing more weight than not doing them... they may sound strange, but it won't harm you.

    Eating higher protein & lower carbs leads to more weight loss. Links to & quotes from the studies here:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/MKEgal/view/2014-08-09-high-protein-diet-685553
    Try 45% carbs, 20% fat, 35% protein to stay within the healthy macro ranges (remember that table from the AJCN?).

    Eat about half your calories for breakfast (see the last half of this post for the studies):
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/MKEgal/view/2014-06-10-some-studies-about-weight-loss-667818
  • Abby2205
    Abby2205 Posts: 253 Member
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    Please don't let your self-worth be tied to the last fifteen pounds. When you look in the mirror, you should see a beautiful woman, a strong fit mother, who has lost 65 pounds! I feel bad for you that you only see a fifteen pound "flaw".
    Now to practical advice. Do you eat back all of your exercise calories? Some of your burns seem high--561 calories for 50 minutes of elliptical, 836 calories for 60 minutes of cardio, 637 for 40 minutes of tread climber. People around here claim that MFP and machines tend to overestimate calorie burn, so if you have been eating all of them, perhaps try cutting back to 50-75%. I'm also not sure I would count pushing a stroller as additional exercise beyond daily activity.
  • nsolitar
    nsolitar Posts: 1 Member
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    Your problem sounds like you aren't eating enough. You need to eat enough calories in order to lose weight. Your body may be in starvation mode if your calorie intake is very low. Then, your body will hold onto any bit of fat to protect itself and to keep your organs functioning. I would recommend upping your calorie intake a bit and definitely do not go until 4pm without eating. That is not healthy and will not help you lose weight.
  • amy8400
    amy8400 Posts: 478 Member
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    Best tool in my kitchen (next to my beloved Vitamix) is a $20 food scale. If you haven't found your scale yet, invest in a new one. Just like your bathroom scale, it doesn't lie and you'll know *exactly* what you're eating...otherwise everything you're logging is just a guess.

    I agree with Abby2205 that you may be overestimating your exercise calories. And if you're not weighing food for accuracy, between the two you could be actually at maintenance.

    Don't let this get you down--your self esteem shouldn't be tied to the last 15 pounds. You've worked hard and have done great to lose so much weight after having your children. I'm struggling with my last 15 pounds, too, but I am not letting the oh-so stubborn weight around my waist dictate my happiness. You are more than a number on the scale!
  • amandaallenwest
    amandaallenwest Posts: 7
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    Abby2205 wrote: »
    Please don't let your self-worth be tied to the last fifteen pounds. When you look in the mirror, you should see a beautiful woman, a strong fit mother, who has lost 65 pounds! I feel bad for you that you only see a fifteen pound "flaw".
    Now to practical advice. Do you eat back all of your exercise calories? Some of your burns seem high--561 calories for 50 minutes of elliptical, 836 calories for 60 minutes of cardio, 637 for 40 minutes of tread climber. People around here claim that MFP and machines tend to overestimate calorie burn, so if you have been eating all of them, perhaps try cutting back to 50-75%. I'm also not sure I would count pushing a stroller as additional exercise beyond daily activity.

  • amandaallenwest
    amandaallenwest Posts: 7
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    I have a pedometer/heart rate monitor that estimates what I've burned and all that crap. I list anything g on there I can think of that the app says counts. My minions don't always let me do what I need to do. (The pushing the stroller is actually my grocery trips with 3 kids on the cart and it's got stuff in it and I think it should count cuz that thing gets heavy!) I may just take a break from it all and try not to obsess :)
  • amandaallenwest
    amandaallenwest Posts: 7
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    jenncornelsen wrote: »
    Is it just your stomach thats an issue? Dou have loose skin from pregnancies? Did ur stomach muscles seperate? (From ur pregnancy)

  • amandaallenwest
    amandaallenwest Posts: 7
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    Oh yeah, they tore. I have loose skin that I can't do anything about without surgery. I had pre eclampsia with all 3 and kidney failure with 2 of the 3 so my swelling was insane. 3 big babies. So some of it isn't fixable. The love handle/muffin top thin bothers me. And the fat under the loose skin bothers me.
  • jenncornelsen
    jenncornelsen Posts: 969 Member
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    i have the same issue. so u probably know already no amount of crunches of any form will help. ive had a consult for a tummy tuck. i know not every one can do that but it really is the only thing that would help.... i try not to let it bother me on the day today and wear as flattering clothing as i can. i totally know where ur coming from though. but u have done awesome. don't let it distract from how far u have come
  • OwlCherri
    OwlCherri Posts: 13 Member
    edited February 2015
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    Stress produces cortisol which in turn produces fat. Stressing out about it is probably blocking your goal. Try going at it from a different angle and make sure to get the proper amount of sleep as sleep deprivation builds up stress levels.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,717 Member
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    It's good that you have a HRM, but even then, if you aren't losing weight then you are probably over-eating and/or over-estimating calorie burns. I'd start with a food scale and go from there.

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