I need help.

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leoface09
leoface09 Posts: 2 Member
in Introduce Yourself
My name is Anna. I'm a 25 year old woman and I've been obese my entire life. I'm at my heaviest point now, weighing in at about 285. I feel like I try something and succeed for a little while, until something throws me off and I lose all my progress. I deal with chronic depression and anxiety (undoubtedly connected to my weight) and just cannot make myself believe that I will ever actually overcome this. I feel so resigned to being this fat forever, instead of wanting to change. I want to want to change! I want to feel like I deserve the good things in life, instead of being ashamed to show my fat face outside.

I've used MFP on and off for three years, but this is the first time I've posted in the discussions. I'm trying to be proactive this time and get the support I can't seem to get elsewhere. I need people to talk to about this, who really understand how hard it can be, how food can have this crazy power over you, how frustrating it is to take one step forward and two steps back. So if you feel the same way, or if you just have some words of encouragement, please reach out to me. I want this version of myself to be my rock bottom, and I believe that things will get better from here. But I need help.

Replies

  • Tearie84
    Tearie84 Posts: 10
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    You have taken a great step forward.. Take things one day at a time you can make it.... Never let others ditact your health or life
  • simison
    simison Posts: 3
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    You are so young and at a great point in your life to really motivate yourself. I've been on and off the app to and it looks like the community has grown substantially in the past couple years. You can do it!!
  • zzw31
    zzw31 Posts: 2 Member
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    I feel like you're speaking to all of my same issues. I spent a long time ignoring myself and especially my health. I knew everything I was "supposed" to do, but I didn't really care. I was able to make some life changes which made me start to care again (yay!). For me, I worry most about losing motivation and falling back into old habits. I was just looking for some different ways to stay motivated, which is what spurred me to participate in the forums. I'm new to MFP and hoping that it will help me keep to my plan. I hope participating in the forums helps you, too, and if not that, know you are not alone!
  • greeneyed1975
    greeneyed1975 Posts: 13 Member
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    I can really relate to your story. I will start eating better and exercising and then give up after like two weeks. I've had success before going from 205 to 165 but I had to be very strict with food and exercise every day. That was nearly ten years ago and a couple pregnancies so now I'm about 244 and have been in denial about my weight. I honestly did not see myself as obese. I would never take a picture of myself unless it's just my face so I recently took a picture standing in front of the mirror from the front and back and then made myself really look. It was very humbling to see how much weight I had gained. I'm typically very confident and I think I just was overly confident and unrealistic about myself. I would think we'll I'm overweight but still attractive. I am just done with that denial and feeling tired and hungry all the time.
    For me I have to cut out sugar to eat healthy. I feel like sugar is a drug to me and if I have it I just want more. I would indulge in candy, bread, cereal, just sugar and carbs and I would feel insatiable. I would need a nap every day and break out in acne. As soon as I stop eating sugar, and it takes about a week for me to stop craving it, I feel so much better and I'm not hungry all the time! It's like my entire relationship to food changes when sugar is removed from my diet! I highly recommend this, I still get sugar from fruit so I'm not deprived of something sweet altogether. I have a fruit smoothie every day!
    As far as exercise goes I realized I was spending at least 1-2 hours a day (1/2 hour in the morning, 1/2 hour at lunch and an hour before bed) reading! I love to read and will read a book or two a week. I now exercise an hour a day, in the morning and at lunch and I can still read before bed! So I can't use the excuse that I don't have time.
    I tell myself everyday: eat right, exercise, track it on mfp and then do it again the next day until something changes!
    I love to talk about this stuff so feel free to reach out and to add me! Good luck, you can do this!!!
  • greeneyed1975
    greeneyed1975 Posts: 13 Member
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    Oh and my name is Rachel! :D

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