hard time sticking to a diet

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ok so I have been trying for years to lose weight and nothing works, it's either hard to stick to or I just can't lose on the plan and I get discouraged and give up. I need help, does anyone have any ideas for me. thanks

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  • Alyssa_Is_LosingIt
    Alyssa_Is_LosingIt Posts: 4,696 Member
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    What is your idea of a "diet"? Do you incorporate some of the foods you love in moderation, or do you tend to give up food groups, aggressively slash calories, or crash diet (cabbage soup diet, military diet, etc.)?
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
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    Stop dieting and make a life change.
  • amber_rose724
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    I try to have foods in moderation, it doesn't work, I've given up food groups at times, that hasn't worked either and have even tried to do a fast and well yeah didn't work at all 'cause I felt hungry. I've tried almost everything I could possibly think of.
  • AmyRhubarb
    AmyRhubarb Posts: 6,890 Member
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    If it says diet, don't do it. :stuck_out_tongue:

    Seriously - "diets" are hard to stick to, and "plans" that are temporary will get you temporary results.

    All you need is a calorie deficit - that means eat fewer calories than what your body burns in a 24 hour period - sleeping, walking, working, watching tv, shopping, exercising, whatever. No special foods, no magic time for meals to begin or end, just a simple calorie deficit. Eat foods that you like, but stay within goal. Yeah, you might need to learn some new habits, change portion sizes, choose more wisely, but you can still eat regular ol food. I do. Burgers, chips, pizza, wine, beer, margaritas, cake, ice cream, cookies - just not every day, and not in massive quantities!

    The only other thing you really need is patience. It takes time to learn the new habits and maybe break some old ones. You use the tools you have here, specifically the daily diary, and learn from it. Look back over your week and the foods you logged. How close did you come to goal? Did you go over? Was there a specific food that put you over? Could you have done with a smaller portion of that food and stayed within goal? Was it worth it? Where can you do better? Did this entry or that entry give you some good protein and fat to help keep you feeling full and satiated? Patience and no guilt if you "mess up" - every day is a new day, and you just keep logging and keep going, and keep learning...and hopefully keep losing the fat. :smile:

    Slow and steady is the sustainable way. Starting over again and again SUCKS! Been there! Vowed over 3 years ago I was done starting over, so I did it for the last time. I have a reasonable calorie goal, and I do a reasonable amount of exercise, and I have stuck with it all this time. I have reached goal weight, and I have kept it off, through holidays, weddings, birthdays, vacations - no starting over! This is for life, so do it in a way that you can actually stick with for life.
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,573 Member
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    Well, now try counting your calories? You can get a lot of support on here.
  • Alyssa_Is_LosingIt
    Alyssa_Is_LosingIt Posts: 4,696 Member
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    You have to really want it to stick to it.

    Try starting with tracking everything you normally eat, and make small changes. Learn how many calories your body needs to maintain your body weight (http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/ is a good resource) and figure out how quickly you want to lose weight.

    You can eat at a very small deficit, lose a bit slower, and not be as hungry, if that's easier for you. I would personally start with a modest deficit and increase it when I got more comfortable logging my food and eating less in general.
  • tlblood
    tlblood Posts: 473 Member
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    ^^These^^

    It's all about the calories. If you work in foods you enjoy in moderation it's easier to stick to a healthier eating life style. Of course, there are days when there's a special event, you eat out, or some otherwise higher-than-usual calories are eaten, but it's all about moderation. I go crazy if I try to cut out entire groups of foods or label foods good/bad. I can stick to this because there's nothing I can't have...I just have to choose how much is reasonable given the number of calories I've already eaten that day.
  • SergeantSausage
    SergeantSausage Posts: 1,673 Member
    edited March 2015
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    We can't do it for you.

    You have to want to lose weight *MORE* than you want to eat the way that is causing you to gain weight.

    This is necessary. A prerequisite.

    Unless you want it more, the alternative will always win.

    Always.
  • bainsworth1a
    bainsworth1a Posts: 313 Member
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    speaking from experience - I have been on many diets in my life and even tried MFP a few years ago and quit. I kept saying "I just can't lose weight no matter what I do". The fact is I was not honest with myself about what I was eating. I did a self help test regarding weight loss and this statement changed everything for me. "you can't change your weight until you change your mind".

    change your attitude. accept that you can do this. you are in control.
    on this plan you don't have to deny yourself anything but you have to track as honestly as possible. don't beat yourself up if you slip

    Good luck
  • ogmomma2012
    ogmomma2012 Posts: 1,520 Member
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    It's a learned skill. Paying attention to your calorie intake also gives you a better idea of proper portion sizes. Think about your favorite treats and their serving sizes. Is it really worth 300 calories for half a cup of icecream? Is it worth skimping on breakfast and dinner to have a large meal at Carls Jr? Think about Papa Johns pizza being over 300 calories PER SLICE. Just start small. Have a salad with that single slice of pizza and eat the salad first so you can enjoy your slice slowly and feel full.
  • tlblood
    tlblood Posts: 473 Member
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    I try to have foods in moderation, it doesn't work, I've given up food groups at times, that hasn't worked either and have even tried to do a fast and well yeah didn't work at all 'cause I felt hungry. I've tried almost everything I could possibly think of.

    Well, there is a fair about of willpower involved in anything you try. If weight loss was easy, the whole world would be a healthy weight. Darn near everything will work if you work it. There are just some things that are easier to work and stick to than others. Nothing will work if you don't have the motivation to put forth the effort. I don't think it's a matter of "nothing works" but more a matter of you haven't found the motivation to stick to it. Until you find the motivation, the reason to put forth the effort even when it's hard, you're right...nothing will work.
  • Dnarules
    Dnarules Posts: 2,081 Member
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    We can't do it for you.

    You have to want to lose weight *MORE* than you want to eat the way that is causing you to gain weight.

    This is necessary. A prerequisite.

    Unless you want it more, the alternative will always win.

    Always.

    Unfortunately, this hits the nail on the head. In mid 2012, I had had enough and decided to do something about it. I lost 54 pounds. I have since gained them back, and can't seem to get back on track. I could make a lot of excuses, but the fact is that right now i don't want this enough. Plain and simple. I obviously know what to do, but I am not doing it. You really need to want to do it. Even then, it isn't always easy, but it rarely works if you don't really want it. Good luck.

  • arlington21
    arlington21 Posts: 34 Member
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    Try involving family or friends to help you with your weight loss goals. They can hold you accountable and help you stick with your diet. Another option is to think of a person with the body weight that you desire and pinpoint that person in your mind as your motivation. Its not impossible to lose weight, so don't give up. Its all in the mind. You can do it, don't be discouraged!
  • gmallan
    gmallan Posts: 2,099 Member
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    Stop trying to change everything all at once. Focus on making one small and sustainable change at a time. What you eat and how much is the key to weight loss, although exercise can help you maintain a deficit and is great for health. Figure out what the problem areas of your diet are and pick one thing to focus on at a time.

    Things you could focus on: liquid calories (sugary drinks), fried foods, fast foods, making more meals at home, eating more vegetables, drinking water...

    Pick something you're about 90% sure you can do and do it for a couple weeks before successfully before picking something else.

    It's a marathon not a sprint
  • amy8400
    amy8400 Posts: 478 Member
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    All great advice from above posters. Very few people succeed at 'diets'. You need to have a mindset that's open to change--permanent change. Many MFPers call it a lifestyle change and I'd agree. But change has to be achievable and maintainable or you'll go right back to the old ways and fail again.

    As others have said...change 1 or 2 things at a time. No more, or you'll be overwhelmed. Start with the easiest changes. You need to see success to keep you moving forward. As you achieve one goal, immediately replace it with a new one. You should always be in a state of working to achieve something so you stay focused. Another tip is to connect here with people who have had or are having success. Surround yourself with winners and you'll be swept up in the current of positivity. I know that sounds hokey but it's the truth.

    Invest in the tools to make your transition to a healthier lifestyle. Purchase a food scale and use it to weight everything. No guessing. Accuracy counts. I bought some cool mini-bowls for small portions of fruit, dips, nuts, treats, etc. They are stinkin' cute but also when I heap them full (and weigh it, of course), it looks like I'm getting a huge portion when I'm really not. I use smaller plates too. Rarely do I use a regular dinner plate except for big salads. Smaller plates loaded full will make you feel like you're eating more. My favorite water "glass" is a Contigo BPA-free acrylic tumbler with a lid and straw. The water looks so much more inviting and is easily kept by on my desk or in the car or at the gym. Invest in good shoes for exercise and workout wear that makes you feel good.

    There are many more things I could say but this will hopefully give you ideas to start with. My first 'big' goal was eliminating diet pop. I did that before I even hit the gym. It took 2 months but I did it. I started feeling better about myself and that gave me the confidence to start working out. Each goal you achieve is a base for the next level. Don't rush them. You will get to where you want to be...if you commit to it and are ready for change.
  • amber_rose724
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    thanks everyone for the advice. I'll try to count calories instead of fad dieting.
  • EricNewark
    EricNewark Posts: 295 Member
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    It's also about changing things gradually. Do little things that don't sound like a lot, but are. I always get seconds at dinner.. So I get started getting a smaller helping at first knowing I'm coming back. If I go to lunch with the guys from the office I'll skip the fries or only eat half of them. I quit drinking pop gradually by asking for extra ice at first (therefor less in cup). Then I always opted for the small cup and next thing I knew I was asking for water (now I drink maybe equal to a can of pop a month). I switched to unsweetened iced tea. I eat extra veggies for dinner so my plate looks "loaded" visually but it's healthier. Little things you can change but still eat what you want. I now hardly ever get 2 helpings.

    I "feel" like I eat more now but in reality what I'm eating is better for me, therefor less caloric and I can maintain by daily calorie goals. After 4 months now I don't even really have to think about it and my normal "bad" habits are changing to "good" ones.

    Once the bad habits change to good to be totally honest, it becomes much easier. Don't stop something you enjoy, change up the moderation and allow yourself to continue enjoying it.
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
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    We can't do it for you.

    You have to want to lose weight *MORE* than you want to eat the way that is causing you to gain weight.

    This is necessary. A prerequisite.

    Unless you want it more, the alternative will always win.

    Always.

    yup
  • NoSFan
    NoSFan Posts: 11
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    Yes!
    Liftng4Lis wrote: »
    Stop dieting and make a life change.

  • NoSFan
    NoSFan Posts: 11
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    Yes!!
    EricNewark wrote: »
    It's also about changing things gradually. Do little things that don't sound like a lot, but are. I always get seconds at dinner.. So I get started getting a smaller helping at first knowing I'm coming back. If I go to lunch with the guys from the office I'll skip the fries or only eat half of them. I quit drinking pop gradually by asking for extra ice at first (therefor less in cup). Then I always opted for the small cup and next thing I knew I was asking for water (now I drink maybe equal to a can of pop a month). I switched to unsweetened iced tea. I eat extra veggies for dinner so my plate looks "loaded" visually but it's healthier. Little things you can change but still eat what you want. I now hardly ever get 2 helpings.

    I "feel" like I eat more now but in reality what I'm eating is better for me, therefor less caloric and I can maintain by daily calorie goals. After 4 months now I don't even really have to think about it and my normal "bad" habits are changing to "good" ones.

    Once the bad habits change to good to be totally honest, it becomes much easier. Don't stop something you enjoy, change up the moderation and allow yourself to continue enjoying it.