Ready to give up

rdhdscorp
rdhdscorp Posts: 12 Member
edited November 12 in Motivation and Support
I've seen the other discussion threads and it has made me feel a little better knowing I'm not the only one out there struggling. But I'm very frustrated and confused at what I am doing wrong. Currently I try to eat within 1100-1300 calories a day during the week and I allow myself to eat around 1400 calories on the weekends. I fast walk/sometimes jog 3 1/2 miles 4 days a week. I enter everything I eat, and I mean everything. I both weigh and measure myself so that I can truly see if I've lost anything.

Well within the last month or more I lost 2 pounds and a little over 2 inches, then this week I gained .2 ounces. I worked my butt off power walking and was exhausted by Friday so to find out nothing I did worked, I'm ready to throw in the towel. Yes, I ate a salad and a small side of rice from El Pollo Loco last night and went over my sodium intake for the day but I just find it hard to believe that that would be why I actually gained weight and didn't lose any inches. You would think I would have lost something. Even a few ounces at least.

I weigh most of my food (although I read I should way all solid foods which I might start doing) and measure others. I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong. I'm not looking for harsh remarks as I'm already at a low point and don't need to feel worse. I'm just at a loss. I was terrified to weigh/measure myself this morning so bad that I had nightmares about it, so to see that my fears were warranted is so discouraging. I'm tired of trying with no success. It feels like I'm putting in all this hard work for nothing while others around me are taking shortcuts and having success. Help please!

Replies

  • Dont give up! U can do this, you've already shown that you are tenacious and determined. I suggest that you weigh once per week and measure yourself once per month because your body fluctuates day by day. Hang n there!!!!
  • MustLoveCats21
    MustLoveCats21 Posts: 137
    edited February 2015
    Be patient and eat more. That calorie goal is much too low. Also, meassuring with cups is for liquid ONLY. Solid food needs to be weighed with a food scale otherwise your calories eaten can be wildly inaccurate.

    Other than that, my advice to you would be to be aware of your weight loss, but don't make it the centre of your life. Have a life outside weight loss, and see it as an addition to your life. It will help you to be patient with it. It's not a linear process. And it takes a while.
  • Bj0223
    Bj0223 Posts: 133 Member
    I would agree your calories are too low. I know this process can be frustrating but happens when you give up? Are you going to start eating crap and let yourself go sort of speak? I think two pounds lost in a month is great! Good Job! Is two ounces really worth the focus you're giving it? Lets celebrate the two pound loss and keep trucking.
  • jsobole
    jsobole Posts: 139 Member
    edited February 2015
    Yup agree with the two posts above - not enough calories! Don't forget to feed your body - just feed it with good stuff! And you've lost 2 inches! That's amazing. Concentrate on how you feel, how your clothes are fitting and what you're eating and step away from that scale.

    Also - I'm reading you're doing cardio, but I don't see any weight training in there. Are you doing any bodyweight or weight training?
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    whats your height age current weight and target weight?

    Disagree that the answer is to eat more. The normal answer for these questions is that you are eating more than you think or burning less.

    Are you eating back calories? Doesnt look like it.

    The next fallback position is if you are at a definite deficit, then you simply have to keep on doing the same thing and be patient. Weight loss isnt linear, so some weeks it goes down others it doesnt, even if you are at a deficit. Its just the body making its mind up and delayed reaction.

    What worries me about your post is that a small slowdown is making you feel so sad. You need to chill out and relax about the diet. You are doing a good job and seem to have all the basics right, so if you are consistent, then you will get to your target weight eventually. making yourself sad for a slowdown is just counter productive as it doesnt have you in the best frame of mind and will make you less effective. take a step back from it and realise you will get there, whats happening can be sorted out and you will get to traget weight if you wish, its just going to take time and application. Be patient, and have a little faith in yourself. You will be fine. get some friends as well if you find support helpful.

    Good luck.
  • rdhdscorp
    rdhdscorp Posts: 12 Member
    999tigger wrote: »
    whats your height age current weight and target weight?

    Disagree that the answer is to eat more. The normal answer for these questions is that you are eating more than you think or burning less.

    Are you eating back calories? Doesnt look like it.

    The next fallback position is if you are at a definite deficit, then you simply have to keep on doing the same thing and be patient. Weight loss isnt linear, so some weeks it goes down others it doesnt, even if you are at a deficit. Its just the body making its mind up and delayed reaction.

    What worries me about your post is that a small slowdown is making you feel so sad. You need to chill out and relax about the diet. You are doing a good job and seem to have all the basics right, so if you are consistent, then you will get to your target weight eventually. making yourself sad for a slowdown is just counter productive as it doesnt have you in the best frame of mind and will make you less effective. take a step back from it and realise you will get there, whats happening can be sorted out and you will get to traget weight if you wish, its just going to take time and application. Be patient, and have a little faith in yourself. You will be fine. get some friends as well if you find support helpful.

    Good luck.

    I am 5 foot 4 inches, 170.8 pounds, and my goal weight is 150 or less. I am entering every single thing I eat whereas before I would not enter little things like a piece of candy or a glass of wine. Now I entered everything, which was a big surprise when I started.

    I do get very down on myself and I think that’s a problem I have to fix but it’s become an obsession. I won’t bore you with the details of why, but in short it’s the one thing in my life that I feel I can have some sort of control of. Only I can’t.

    Getting advice and some kind words is definitely helping me pull myself up, so thank you. I think I’m going to start eating more vegetables and fruits, a bigger breakfast, and less food at night. Hopefully that will help.
  • rdhdscorp
    rdhdscorp Posts: 12 Member
    jsobole wrote: »
    Yup agree with the two posts above - not enough calories! Don't forget to feed your body - just feed it with good stuff! And you've lost 2 inches! That's amazing. Concentrate on how you feel, how your clothes are fitting and what you're eating and step away from that scale.

    Also - I'm reading you're doing cardio, but I don't see any weight training in there. Are you doing any bodyweight or weight training?

    The point about the clothes hits home because I DO feel a little better in my clothes but no change in inches makes me believe I’m just delusional.

    I haven’t been doing weights because I had to stop my gym membership but I’m going to start incorporating them as well I think. Just some home exercises for about 15-20 minutes.
  • Lindsay_the_great
    Lindsay_the_great Posts: 209 Member
    Try making your focus about your health and a better lifestyle. Don't worry about the results.
  • PinkyPan1
    PinkyPan1 Posts: 3,018 Member
    I too am a power walker and it took a while for the scale to move. I lost inches first. You are being too hard on yourself. My advice is to be patient and keep doing what you are doing. Weigh you food, drink half your body weight in water. I did not eat back my exercise calories. I lost my weight on 1200 calories and it took 5 months (5' 1" and 22 lbs gone) and I have been maintaining for 6 months. I also drink a warm cup of lemon water every morning after my walks. The lemon water is a natural diuretic.
    Be kind to yourself and walk strong.
  • runningforthetrain
    runningforthetrain Posts: 1,037 Member
    Beating yourself wont help- and somewhere I read that the mind thinks "it will take me 2 years at this rate" and this makes you give up. But, this time passes either way. I am really frustrated too. I have only lost about 5 pounds in 6 months. Many days I walk 3 miles everyday.-- usually 5 miles one day. Maintenance cals for me is around 1450. I tell myself it is better than gaining even MORE. It sucks. I know. Soooo don't give up- it will only be worse. :) Not sure this is a motivating post-- I just felt like I wanted to empathize- and tell you I am in the same boat!
  • opalsqueak007
    opalsqueak007 Posts: 433 Member
    Never, ever give up! I was in your position last summer, but suddenly after several weeks, the weight started flying off. I am now 45lb down. Do this thing for yourself and realise that it takes time. Good luck.
  • minionman
    minionman Posts: 308 Member
    Try making your focus about your health and a better lifestyle. Don't worry about the results.

    Good point, when it becomes an obsession, stress can do wonders on the body... I was in the same boat, try not to weigh yourself and stick to your program, get rid of the candy, meet your caloric needs, less sodium means less water retention that can cause that whatever ounce fluctuations in your weight. Try to relax and have fun, if you quit, you'll lose the progess you've made, believe me, you feel so much better when you reach your goal....... It's a lot better then starting over in a couple of months. Wish you the best and hang in there!
  • jlmdc29
    jlmdc29 Posts: 26 Member
    I've found that its taking a lot longer this time. I've lost weight in my early 20's, super easy. After I had my son in my 30's saw steady progress but took a bit longer. Divorce weight in my 40's... it's taking FOREVER. While my thoughts are due to personal experience my girlfriend is having the same experience. Not everyone will agree that age matters but I think it does. I've just stuck it out and it HAS worked but at a very slow rate.
  • kristenlarkin
    kristenlarkin Posts: 235 Member
    Maybe try a different diet. Low calorie doesn't work for me. Low carb works great. Everyone one is different, you just need to find what works for your body.
  • minionman
    minionman Posts: 308 Member
    Maybe try a different diet. Low calorie doesn't work for me. Low carb works great. Everyone one is different, you just need to find what works for your body.

    I'm sorry and please don't take offense, I find half of your statement true, diet is such a bad word, people should adopt a lifestyle instead of diets cause their temporary, you should listen to your body and figure out what's right for you and what works, for some people it's harder, some it's easier. Just don't give up, track what you eat and see how it makes you feel, if you know your bloated then maybe like you said , your sodium is high, so next time skip the salt. See what feels good and what feels bad, teach yourself what you can and can't have, then that way you don't deny yourself. Diets just mean you hit your goal then it's all out buffet, for me I learned what my body does agree with and what it likes, I have a gluten allergy so now I switched out doritos for gluten free tortillas, and a shock one serving of doritos 6 chips, tortillas 30.., rambling typing.
  • kristenlarkin
    kristenlarkin Posts: 235 Member
    minionman wrote: »
    Maybe try a different diet. Low calorie doesn't work for me. Low carb works great. Everyone one is different, you just need to find what works for your body.

    I'm sorry and please don't take offense, I find half of your statement true, diet is such a bad word, people should adopt a lifestyle instead of diets cause their temporary, you should listen to your body and figure out what's right for you and what works, for some people it's harder, some it's easier. Just don't give up, track what you eat and see how it makes you feel, if you know your bloated then maybe like you said , your sodium is high, so next time skip the salt. See what feels good and what feels bad, teach yourself what you can and can't have, then that way you don't deny yourself. Diets just mean you hit your goal then it's all out buffet, for me I learned what my body does agree with and what it likes, I have a gluten allergy so now I switched out doritos for gluten free tortillas, and a shock one serving of doritos 6 chips, tortillas 30.., rambling typing.

    You're right, sorry! I have been saying diet for years and it just slips. It is a way of life after you figure out what works best.
  • 42carrots
    42carrots Posts: 97 Member
    Honestly I find that sometimes when I know I'm eating at a steady deficit I weigh myself and the scale doesn't reflect it. Then I go a few days longer, some of which I'm eating closer to maintenance rather than a 500cal per day deficit, and suddenly the scale shows I've lost more weight that I thought I would have. It doesn't always seem to be a linear process. This is just anecdotal based on my own experience but I've noticed that for me there often seems to be a lag between my eating patterns and losing or gaining weight, that is the weight loss or gain is reflected in the scale numbers sometimes quite a few days after I "achieved" it, so to speak. In other words, hang in there - you've done the hard work, maybe you just need to give it a little more time to be able to see the results.
  • farmerpam1
    farmerpam1 Posts: 402 Member
    Don't give up! Remember, slow and steady wins the race, it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change. Try not to be so hard on yourself, and drink lots of water. You got this!
  • tjcuts339
    tjcuts339 Posts: 188 Member
    Never. Give up it will happen you have came to far!! It is a personal. Jouney. You will get to your goals. !!! And be stronger and healthy. Along the way!!
  • rdhdscorp
    rdhdscorp Posts: 12 Member
    Thanks all for your support, suggestions and kind words. I'm back on it, this time trying to plan out my meals for the week ahead of time so I don't have to think too much when it's time to eat. Everything is measured, weighed, etc. So far it's been pretty great. I'm a decent cook, at least I think I am, so my food has been pretty yummy and it's nice having everything ready to go. I'm also switching things up for exercising. I'm still walking but I'm also doing some workouts at home to incorporate weights. I'm giving it a couple weeks before I even think of measuring or weighing myself. Wish me luck!
  • LuckyMe2017
    LuckyMe2017 Posts: 454 Member
    Haven't read the other posts but there are many possibilities. I am in a similar position. Id been losing 2lb per week and then suddenly started fluctuating up/down btwn 187-188 for a week. I have resolved to be patient. It could be water weight, type of carbs, simple resistance from my body... I don't know. Or maybe I lost inches in an unmeasured spot. Just keep going. Friend me if you'd like.
    SW-212
    CW-187
    GW-130s
  • rdhdscorp
    rdhdscorp Posts: 12 Member
    I just want to thank everyone again for the words of encouragement, suggestions and keeping me strong. I think that I have finally found something that works (walking every day at lunch, eating 1100-1200 calories a day, measuring & weighing everything, and meal planning) and I'm so happy to finally feel like all my hard work is paying off. You all really helped so thank you again.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    It sounds like your plan has some really sound points. Dont forget to avoid beating up on yourself as you are the most importnat person and you need to still be there at the end when you get to your target. Other than that consistency and just taking it one day at a ime will get you a long way. If you make some bad choices one day, just learn from it and try and make better ones the day after. Be patient and you will get there. Ask if you feel lost or hit trouble. Good luck.
  • blankiefinder
    blankiefinder Posts: 3,599 Member
    You need to accept that some weeks, the scale won't drop, and just stick with your plan. If you want to give up after a one week stall, how will you handle a one month plateau? They can happen. This is the time to build your confidence that you can do it, and that you won't let set backs stop you.

    In the meantime, hang in there. Sometimes the weight doesn't drop right away, sometimes your body retains water or whatever, and you will get a sudden whoosh.
    Some weeks, you’ll find that you don’t lose any weight at all – even when you’re maintaining the appropriate caloric deficit. The scale pretty much stays exactly the same.
    Then the following week, you’ll suddenly lose a whole bunch of weight at once – in fact, much more than you would expect to lose in just one week.
    But how could this be? You are eating the same number of calories, exercising the same amount – why is it that you would lose such staggeringly different amounts, week to week?
    Well, the answer to this lies in something that has been fittingly dubbed “the whoosh”. Yes, you read that right!
    taken from here
  • DKLI
    DKLI Posts: 63 Member
    Whenever I get frustrated I remind myself that in the long run, it does work. I also remind myself that eating less and getting more exercise is not temporary but how I should be living. When I get into that mindset I can stick to my 'diet' because there really is no "end" but is a positive change overall. Think of it that way and it may help you feel less frustrated that you're not meeting goals fast enough and that it may mentally free you to stay focused. Just my 2 cents. :)
  • jbaile07
    jbaile07 Posts: 7
  • danishgirlbc
    danishgirlbc Posts: 8 Member
    rdhdscorp wrote: »
    I've seen the other discussion threads and it has made me feel a little better knowing I'm not the only one out there struggling. But I'm very frustrated and confused at what I am doing wrong. Currently I try to eat within 1100-1300 calories a day during the week and I allow myself to eat around 1400 calories on the weekends. I fast walk/sometimes jog 3 1/2 miles 4 days a week. I enter everything I eat, and I mean everything. I both weigh and measure myself so that I can truly see if I've lost anything.

    Well within the last month or more I lost 2 pounds and a little over 2 inches, then this week I gained .2 ounces. I worked my butt off power walking and was exhausted by Friday so to find out nothing I did worked, I'm ready to throw in the towel. Yes, I ate a salad and a small side of rice from El Pollo Loco last night and went over my sodium intake for the day but I just find it hard to believe that that would be why I actually gained weight and didn't lose any inches. You would think I would have lost something. Even a few ounces at least.

    I weigh most of my food (although I read I should way all solid foods which I might start doing) and measure others. I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong. I'm not looking for harsh remarks as I'm already at a low point and don't need to feel worse. I'm just at a loss. I was terrified to weigh/measure myself this morning so bad that I had nightmares about it, so to see that my fears were warranted is so discouraging. I'm tired of trying with no success. It feels like I'm putting in all this hard work for nothing while others around me are taking shortcuts and having success. Help please!

    I spent a year doing what you did & it was maddening! For me, I found out I wasn't eating enough!! I had 3 trainers tell me same thing but I found it hard to believe, that taking in MORE food could help me lose weight & gain muscle. It's about your body thinking its is starvation mode so it holds on to every pound. I finally was so frustrated I decided to give it a try. He upped my calorie intake to 1500 / day with 40-30-30 split (protein 40 %, carbs 30 % and fat 30 %) he made me promise not to weigh for 10 days
  • danishgirlbc
    danishgirlbc Posts: 8 Member
    Shoot it cut off my reply ... Anyways... Losing eight now!!! It works!
  • mamaomefo
    mamaomefo Posts: 418 Member
    I agree totally with 42carrots. This weight loss process in not linear. Sometimes it shows up during a week you don't expect it. Sometimes there is a little gain in the weeks you do expect to lose. Just don't give up. This is a journey, sometimes a long one to get to the goal. But if you work through the weeks you don't like with continued perseverance you WILL win!!! Keep up the awesome work. It is work, not achieved easily, most of the time. You can do this!!
  • inchwormbyinchworm
    inchwormbyinchworm Posts: 180 Member
    @rdhdscorp‌
    I appreciate your very high expectations, but I can understand why you are burned out. Perhaps if you think more marathon and less sprint, you will be able to enjoy the process a little more and feel less discouraged.
    Hang in there!
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