no clue where to put this.

Jennnnnnnny
Jennnnnnnny Posts: 373 Member
edited September 19 in Motivation and Support
i really can't do this. i said i could but i can't. i will never be thin. its not possible. i already got made fun of three times in the past two days about my weight. once "fat" second time "fat *kitten*" third time "stupid fat b***h"

and to top it off i know it sounds ridiculous but i dont think im gonna handle not being able to see my boyfriend as much when im off to college. he hates talkin on the phone and whenever his brother wants to do something i get screwed off and its whatever..i know he loves me but i can't handle it.

I just feel so miserable right now. i can't stop with the tears. :frown:

Replies

  • Jennnnnnnny
    Jennnnnnnny Posts: 373 Member
    i really can't do this. i said i could but i can't. i will never be thin. its not possible. i already got made fun of three times in the past two days about my weight. once "fat" second time "fat *kitten*" third time "stupid fat b***h"

    and to top it off i know it sounds ridiculous but i dont think im gonna handle not being able to see my boyfriend as much when im off to college. he hates talkin on the phone and whenever his brother wants to do something i get screwed off and its whatever..i know he loves me but i can't handle it.

    I just feel so miserable right now. i can't stop with the tears. :frown:
  • jwinfield
    jwinfield Posts: 42 Member
    Oh sweetie! You're making me sad for you....:cry: Listen. YOU CAN DO THIS. You have to believe that. Use everyones ugly words as motivation! I know that sounds cliche' (sp?) but it whatever works! You know what helps me? Knowing that it could be worse....I could have 100 or 150 or 200 pounds to lose. It helps me to keep that in the forefront of my mind. You can do it. Even if nobody else in your life is supportive.....YOU HAVE THE STRENGTH. After all you are a woman. :wink:

    :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • chipper15173
    chipper15173 Posts: 3,981 Member
    i am sorry you are having a hard time right now.....weekends always seem to be hard.
    you CAN do this. it just changing some habits. it might be easier for you to change one thing at a time. like start eating healthier breakfast for a week and the next week a healthier lunch to go with your new breakfast. or just change a food item.
    there are many college kids here. maybe one of them will come along and give advice on that.
    lift your chin up and start anew.
    good luck
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    Hey hun!

    I am so sorry for what you're going through. I don't understand why people need to be so cruel. I think sticks and stones would be less painful!!

    All I can say is I have been where you are. I have felt like weight-loss was so daunting and seemed impossible. I yo-yo dieted through my 20's because I refused to accept the fact that doing this the slow and healthy way not only leads to new lifestyle but it also happens much faster than you think.

    I mean, think about it a minute. Time is going to pass anyway right? The days and weeks and months will go by. The thing that kept me going was knowing that if I stayed the same and several months passed, I would be really upset with myself. However, if you just do this. Just lower your calories enough but not too much and exercise, think of where you will be by Summer. And you don't have to starve and suffer to get there.

    And while those hurtful comments are definitely fuel to keep you going, you should always focus on doing this for yourself. The thing I keep telling everyone is if you treat your body well, it will reward you! That means eat to fuel your body and exercise to get strong. You will feel so great!!

    Good luck to you!! Please don't give up!

    :flowerforyou:
    -Tami
  • mkatzb3
    mkatzb3 Posts: 31 Member
    I know it can be hard believe me! Ive been trying for a few weeks and even though I am not getting quick results I am eating healthier, exercising more and I feel overall healthier! Recognize little changes. For example, I made little changes here and there about my eating habits and I realized I wasn't as tired in the morning. Start with small steps and eventually you will reach your goals!

    On another note... I had along distance boyfriend this past year when I was in college and communication is KEY! If he doesnt want to put the effort into this relationship then you need to find someone who loves you enough to try. Its hard to except but its true!
    I was at my all time low and my long distance relationship was not working because my boyfriend and I were not talking because he HATED talking on the phone! We broke it off and I found the motivation to start taking control of my life and stop relying on someone else to make me feel happy! I was worried no one would love me because of my weight. I realized that people LOVE being around positive outgoing people and those little changes I made inspired me to improve other things besides my diet. It sounds corny but give it a try and Im sure you'll see some results.
    Hope this helps
    Don't give up and focus on your happiness!..

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  • Hannah_Banana
    Hannah_Banana Posts: 1,242 Member
    I mean, think about it a minute. Time is going to pass anyway right? The days and weeks and months will go by. The thing that kept me going was knowing that if I stayed the same and several months passed, I would be really upset with myself. However, if you just do this. Just lower your calories enough but not too much and exercise, think of where you will be by Summer. And you don't have to starve and suffer to get there.

    Exactly what I would have said. In a year you can be exactly where you are right now, or you can be a whole new, more confident you. :flowerforyou:
  • Jennnnnnnny
    Jennnnnnnny Posts: 373 Member
    thank you so much guys for everything! all the comments were so sweet. guess i just gotta put my head up high and believe i can do it!!

    thanks guys!:smile:
  • crystal_sapphire
    crystal_sapphire Posts: 1,205 Member
    things might be hard today, but tomorrow is another day
  • joann
    joann Posts: 624 Member
    lobsterchick go look at the before and after pics that have been posted I can tell from exerience we have all had the thoughts that you are having..Then one day it just clicks in..and yes we have all fallen but the biggest thing is ..is to get right back up the next day..It's hard I know I was a 6x chubby in kindergarden and a size 22 in high school..just remeber everyone here will always help...good luck joann
  • 515TeachNRun
    515TeachNRun Posts: 6,493 Member
    Lobsterchick: You CAN do this! I agree with so many of the other wise posters before me. One step and one day at a time.

    Remember too, this is more than about being, thin. There is health and fitness. Focus on the feel of the contours of your muscles as you strenghten your body.

    And the long-distance thing stinks. Remember you deserve someone who will respect you and your needs, not just not do something because he doesn't like it. And if this is the right guy, you two will work through this and emerge a stronger, more united couple.
  • I know how hard it is to try and try and try and not feel like anything is working. Give it time, you can't rush it, look at it this way....I've been seriously watching my calories and exercising for the past 3 months and have only lost 4 pounds, but I feel fantastic b/c I know what I'm doing is the healthy way to do it. I have suffered through eating disorders as well as depression and anxiety and there is alot of truth in "there's no quick fix". Look at it the way I do, I'm doing this for my overall health and wellbeing, this is a lifestyle change not just another diet/exercise phase to just lose some weight. If you're in this mentally as well as physically, and you're in it for the long haul then you can do it. Try a little bit at a time until it's something you think you can live with for the rest of your life, nothing more, nothing less. As far as the boyfriend situation....I've been there. My fiance and I have broken up around 10 times in the past 6 years b/c of lack of communication, but we've worked really hard at it and things worked out. My advise for you would be for you both to get a webcam. If he doesn't like talking on the phone, try chatting on an instant messenger with your webcam up so you can both see each other while you talk or type. It helps wonders, believe me. Good luck to you and always remember that even if other people don't think you are a beautiful person inside and out, the ultimate judge is you. If you look at yourself in a positive light then it won't matter what insults people throw your way b/c you can just say, "I"m sorry you feel that way, I happen to think I'm a beautiful person and I think it's sad that you have to put me down to feel better about yourself"
  • Hey girl
    first, thank you for the e-mail request to be friends. Now about what people have been calling you a lot of times people will do and say that kind of stuff to make them feel better about there selfs or to take the spot light off what is wrong with them. that in it self shows you how right/smart they really are. also as for the boyfriend I know you will miss him when you are at school it might bring you more togather later or it could give you the chance to keep working on yourself until you are happy and in the process you might find a great guy that knows how to balance girlfriend and family. you should never settle for being second you are already better than that
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