Can anybody shed some light on this "phenomenon?"

So first, congratulations and good for you. Seriously. Take every little victory and celebrate it.
But, I hear you. I've lost 135lbs and I still sometimes feel "big". The brain is a really complicated device and it doesn't always see things the way the rest of the world sees them. I just have to occasionally look back at where I've come from - THAT was big.. haha. But in reality, if you feel great that's awesome. Sometimes it's hard to play the long game - but I'm trying. I have to tune people out sometimes. If I listened to my mother for example, you'd think the world was coming to an end because of my newly found focus on health. But that's a whole other story... LOL.

I absolutely understand. This is my second time losing weight (lost before with MFP, then gained it back because law school sucks, whoops). Both times I have found that once I start losing, I'm harder on myself and my body than ever before. It stinks! I think it's because before I start losing, I don't think about my body that much - I mean, I know I'm bigger than I'd like to be, and that makes me insecure, but I try not to dwell on it. Once I lose weight, though, I'm constantly focusing on my body - that's part of the weight loss game! Weighing in, measuring, etc. Then I start to notice all these little imperfections. "I lost weight but my tummy is still jiggly, my thighs are still too big, etc."

In some ways I feel even bigger after losing weight than I did before.

The brain sucks. I think all we can do is keep going and hope our brain catches up to our bodies and realizes that we do, in fact, look awesome!

Congratulations on your achievement and you are not alone in this type of feeling! I completely agree with what has already been said here. I started this journey at just under 400 pounds and broke through the 330 barrier just this past week. While I am still a "big" man in terms of physical size, I don't always feel in my mind like I have already lost 70 pounds. It is what our minds are used to thinking that often determines how we feel and part of this process is getting you mind to change just as you have with your body. While I haven't received much direct negative feedback from others, I find it is easy for me to try and read between the lines at times and often find comments that aren't really there. Negativity can be a good motivator but too much of it does have the opposite effect.

You look great and it sounds like you feel great (which you should) so let that be your motivation. Don't let others try to bring you down by pushing their possible insecurity and self-doubt onto you.

Keep up the excellent work!

Haters and gonna hate. So glad your husband is standing side by side with you through this journey. Just keep up a positive attitude and others will learn to respect that from you. Keep up the good work and the hubby will continue to brag and push you forward. After all you live with him, you don't your coworkers.

(My husband just suggested that feeling fat this week might have something to do with the moon being so close to earth.... now that's an interesting idea!)

T_X_L wrote: »

Here's my take:
Fat friends, etc. negative - Your success is making them feel inadequate, their problem.
Not fat friends, etc. negative - Your success is eroding their secret feeling of superiority, their problem.

Your hubby: How YOU doin????

I totally agree! I am thoroughly enjoying my friends who are also trying to change their lifestyle as well. The large ones are a little condescending and critical, as are the already skinny minnies.... and your theory fits perfectly for them!

For me, every time I feel really happy that I've hit a new goal, I realize all the other things I should be doing to be even better and feel inadequate. I even wrote a blog about the 'phenomenon' for Psychology Today. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/thinking-about-kids/201005/letting-perfection-go).

Enjoy your accomplishment. Let perfection go.

I have lost 50lb and am now 144lb on a large 5'7" frame - a good weight, but I feel fatter than I ever did when I was 194lb. I don't understand why. I look in the mirror and can see that I am not "fat" as such, but I feel it. For me, I think it's because I was at least firm before, whereas now I am probably skinny fat.
-

jenniferjohnsonament wrote: »

Opal..from your pic you look great! Congratulations on your weight loss success..that is incredible. I am 5 foot 8 and 150 so we have almost the same stats :-)

Sometimes lately I've had to remind myself (OUT LOUD) that I was SO proud of myself when I hit 160 (my first goal as I really didn't think I'd get back to 150 when I started.) I feel almost mental that I felt like a sexy beast 10 lbs ago and now I'm so critical of myself.

Lol Thanks so much for your reply Jennifer - I was exactly the same in that 160 was my goal! I felt brilliant at 160lb, but kept going, and now feel fat at 144lb. Thanks for your nice comments - you have cheered me up

Wasn't it sort of the reverse as we gained weight though? As I was putting on weight over the years, I didn't immediately wake up every morning feeling fat. It was only when I started seeing pictures of myself (sitting on the floor at my son's birthday with the "inner tire" was eye opening!) that I really thought about how I was looking.

I was happy (am happy!) and was so consumed with feeling smart, capable, and actually happy that I hadn't noticed that the weight was really packing on and my energy had gone down. If it took 10 years to put it on, maybe it will take 10 years to get our head around that we lost it.

I saw something that said, "I wish I was half as fat as I thought I was 20 years ago!". Sadly, we are always critical of how we look. Have you seen the new Dove commercial? It's about what we say to ourselves that we would never say out loud to someone else. Compliment yourself (sincerely) once a day! New Challenge!

nxd10 wrote: »

For me, every time I feel really happy that I've hit a new goal, I realize all the other things I should be doing to be even better and feel inadequate. I even wrote a blog about the 'phenomenon' for Psychology Today. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/thinking-about-kids/201005/letting-perfection-go).

Enjoy your accomplishment. Let perfection go.

Great blog post--that describes me to a T.