Does anyone else hate having their weight commented on in public?

armygirl165
armygirl165 Posts: 8 Member
edited November 15 in Motivation and Support
I've been losing weight on and off for the past 2-3 years, and for some reason every time a friend or family member says "you've lost weight!" or similar, it feels like a slap in the face. I know that they mean it to be a compliment and I always pretend to accept it gratefully, but secretly I feel embarrassed - maybe it's because they're acknowledging that I was too big before, or because I don't like my body being scrutinised. Out of curiosity, does anyone else feel this way?

Replies

  • blankiefinder
    blankiefinder Posts: 3,599 Member
    I don't, but it might be because I am now smaller than most of the people commenting, so I am proud that I did it and they haven't. I'm no angel, what can I say? o:)
  • ErinJay18
    ErinJay18 Posts: 30 Member
    edited March 2015
    I've always been thin and people tend to say "helpful" mean things to me like "oh honey, men like girls with a little meat on 'em" or "you'll blow up when you have kids/get married/hit 40/etc."
  • pjb58
    pjb58 Posts: 100 Member
    I worked like crazy to lose weight, so I am thankful it was noticeable. I was too heavy, though, so I was more embarrassed about where I started from.
  • 00figg
    00figg Posts: 111 Member
    i don't like it either, i think talking about it is so boring and it is embarrassing so i change the subject as soon as possible without being rude. :smile:
  • eatingforspawn
    eatingforspawn Posts: 34 Member
    edited March 2015
    This is a very common feeling for a lot of people.

    I have done it to people too, who have lost a lot of weight and looking back, I do feel it is tacky and won't be doing it again. I can still compliment people in other ways if I want to that does not point out any specific feature they may be sensitive about, like simply saying "You look really great!"

    I have not lost a lot of weight in recent years, besides about 30 pounds a few years ago, but there is one woman, my mother's friend, who, every, single, time, she sees me, which is once or twice a year, she greets me with an excited exclamation that I have lost weight. This is whether or not my weight has changed at all, or stayed the same. Some people just think it is a polite thing to say. I find it irritating, and I called her on it last time I saw her.

    "Oh you lost weight!"

    "Actually I gained about ten pounds since you saw me last."

    *Awkward moment.

    The next time I see her will be right after I have my baby, and I will surely be larger than when she saw me last. If she says that I lost weight at that moment, *kitten* will get real.
  • piggysmalls333
    piggysmalls333 Posts: 450 Member
    I can't stand it either. I just say thanks and quickly change the subject.
  • scaryg53
    scaryg53 Posts: 268 Member
    I just hate being told I've lost too much. All of my family tells me I'm too thin. I could lose another 8 pounds and be in a healthy weight range for my height. I'm not losing anymore, I'm in maintenance and I eat a healthy amount of food. I feel like they always have to pick my body apart and I absolutely hate it. People at work made comments like that, too. Someone asked me if I eat. Of course I eat, what kind of question is that?
  • PrizePopple
    PrizePopple Posts: 3,133 Member
    I've lost 34 pounds, I would hope to hell someone would notice that. I honestly don't get the being upset over it. It's an observation that is usually quite obvious. I didn't even flinch when my own father patted my stomach and said "I can really see the loss there". It's my problem area, I've had 2 kids, it will always be my problem area. The fact that someone who sees me often noticed is actually kind of awesome really. I've had people tell me I don't need to lose any more, and I just said "well, I still have 20 to go so I can be at the weight I was between my kids." No big deal.

    And then when someone asks me how I've done it, I am more than happy to say I did it by still eating everything I like, but logging it and keeping my portions in my caloric goals.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    Nope, oo for me its noticeable and its always well intentioned.
  • kbmnurse
    kbmnurse Posts: 2,484 Member
    Yes, "Your the thinnest I have ever seen you". Thank you. I have been doing Leslie Sansone's walking DVD's faithfully since the end of December.
  • Imadorkable
    Imadorkable Posts: 442 Member
    I don't like it when I get the backhanded compliment. Such as after losing 70lbs with 20 more to go, my grandma says 'you look good but you still have to work on those hips.' Really?!?!
  • MindySaysWhaaat
    MindySaysWhaaat Posts: 401 Member
    I used to take the "You're losing weight, good!" compliments too personally, especially if I was having a bad week.

    Last Christmas, when I was the heaviest weight I've ever been, my aunt complimented me and said I looked like I'd lost weight.

    I try not to think too much into the comments of other people now.
  • tonihunter945
    tonihunter945 Posts: 62 Member
    armygirl165 wrote: »
    I've been losing weight on and off for the past 2-3 years, and for some reason every time a friend or family member says "you've lost weight!" or similar, it feels like a slap in the face. I know that they mean it to be a compliment and I always pretend to accept it gratefully, but secretly I feel embarrassed - maybe it's because they're acknowledging that I was too big before, or because I don't like my body being scrutinised. Out of curiosity, does anyone else feel this way?

  • tonihunter945
    tonihunter945 Posts: 62 Member
    I hate that too!
  • shireeniebeanie
    shireeniebeanie Posts: 293 Member
    Everyone should take a cue from the British: "You're looking well!"
  • allie_00p
    allie_00p Posts: 280 Member
    The comments are generally from a good place, but it does make me uncomfortable when others comment on my weight unless it's close friends or family. Someone I run into a lot through work has taken to telling me if I lose any more weight I'm "going to blow away", I think because I met him right after I had my daughter, so I was at my heaviest. It doesn't "offend" me, but it does make me uncomfortable in that I don't know how to respond. I just try to take it in stride and accept the compliment.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    Surely having someone say youve lost weight is better than them saying youve put it on? Underweight people not included.
  • premsajee
    premsajee Posts: 5 Member
    Yes I feel upset when some say I am fat have to reduce my weight
  • pineapple_peach10
    pineapple_peach10 Posts: 239 Member
    I also feel embarrassed when people mention it as well. I think it just has to do with the fact I am self conscious about people saying anything (even good things) about my body.

    I've also been asked if I've lost so much weight because I've been sick or if I've been "throwing up". Very awkward.
  • farmerpam1
    farmerpam1 Posts: 402 Member
    I really don't mind when someone mentions it, unless it's a back handed thing. It's obvious that I've lost, I have one "close" friend who said nothing. Nothing, really? Except for little passive aggressive things, she laughed when I was wearing a skirt and made some snarky comment about how I never used to dress nicely. Duh. I ditched her and kept going.
  • Not_a_skin_suit
    Not_a_skin_suit Posts: 1 Member
    I'm so glad I'm not alone! I hate when people mention my weight at all, even if it is supposed to be a compliment. It feels so RUDE! I'm a terrible person so I make things really awkward. 'No I haven't lost a thing.' and then just stare.
  • mistikal13
    mistikal13 Posts: 1,457 Member
    I don't really mind it
  • cparsons_60
    cparsons_60 Posts: 95 Member
    There are people I see just once per week, at church. Several of them comment on my weight loss every single week, and don't talk to me about anything else. I used to enjoy actual conversations with these people, but now they're just repetitive and boring. Yes, I've lost weight, yes, I'm still losing, can we move on now?
  • barbecuesauce
    barbecuesauce Posts: 1,771 Member
    I hate it when they comment in public. I hate it when they comment in private.

    I get the "stop losing weight!" from people now, but I'm in the middle of the BMI range and am nowhere near underweight.
  • firststepformefal
    firststepformefal Posts: 180 Member
    I do not like it and tell my friends and relatives that weight is a sensitive subject to me and I would prefer not to discuss it. That usually shuts them up. :)
  • mollywhippet
    mollywhippet Posts: 1,890 Member
    I really like it when people comment, or even when they ask how much I've lost. At least they noticed. What I don't like is when some people assume that I had surgery. Not that there is anything wrong with having surgery if you need it, but I didn't have it and somehow it feels like they are diminishing my accomplishment.

    My best friends just tell me I'm looking good.
  • missjones513
    missjones513 Posts: 345 Member
    Yes, I don't like attention so it's awkward when people make comments.
This discussion has been closed.

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