Rant about weight loss

Beefyg
Beefyg Posts: 27
edited September 2024 in Health and Weight Loss
I have a rant about weight loss for us gals. :explode: My husband thinks that if I follow the rules to my clean eating diet I can lose 5 lbs. a week because I was able to lose 5lbs the first week. I explained that the first week was probably mostly water weight. I would like to lose more than 1-2lbs a week but I don’t think it is possible because women lose weight differently.

I work out 5 days a week at least. I eat clean except if I am at a friend’s house with no “clean” options. I have been diligently doing my diet now for about 3 months. He told me last week that I am not losing as much as I could because I have not kept my diet strict. I did have a few cheat meals over the past few weeks. Easter, Mother’s day and a birthday I had cheat meals because of no “clean” options. Aren’t cheat meals OK every once in a while?

I would love to lose 5 lbs. a week, but I don’t think that is healthy. I made a promise to him that I would be 100% on task with my dieting and exercising for 2 weeks to prove him wrong. Women lose weight differently. If I manage to lose 4 lbs. in one week I will put my foot in my mouth and tell him how wrong I was. Does anyone out there have any advice? Wednesday will be the end of my first week with no cheating. I will let you know what I have lost.

Replies

  • pittielover23
    pittielover23 Posts: 268
    Yeah, your husband's expectations are WAY too high. I would have a serious talk with him and tell him that 1-2lbs per week is the best way to lose weight. And of course a cheat meal is OK every once in awhile! In fact, I have one a week. That is what works for me.

    It sounds like you are doing a great job. You just need to tell your husband to adjust his expectations and be more supportive of you and your new lifestyle.
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
    No way is losing 5 lbs a week healthy. Perhaps very obese people can after something like surgery, but it's certainly not healthy for the majority of us. 1-2 lbs is considered healthy, but most people can't maintain that. Fact is, some weeks, no matter how diligent you were with your diet and exercise, you just won't lose at all.
  • msrn8143
    msrn8143 Posts: 90 Member
    I may be out of line but my question would be are you doing this for you or for your husband? Instead of telling you that you aren't doing enough he should be telling you how great you've done and how wonderful you look.
  • Beefyg
    Beefyg Posts: 27
    Normally my husband is very supportive, and this particular topic really upset me. That is why I came to you guys. I appreciate all of the advice!!
  • vallejos6
    vallejos6 Posts: 146 Member
    I've been at this a LONG time (started changing my lifestyle in July 2009) and during my active weight loss efforts (I took almost a year off and just held steady while dealing with a major life altering situation) I have lost almost without exception an average of 1 pound a week. The only time I can think of that losing more than that would be realistic and healthy would be if you are very obese, which from your profile picture I can see isn't the case. Now, there have been some weeks I haven't lost a thing and other weeks I've lost 2-3 pounds in one week, but the over all average remains the same. The weeks I maintained (or even gained a few ounces) were never very predictable.. sometimes I'd been totally "on plan" and sometimes not. (oh, and for the record, it's not just women... my hubby has been really disciplined with his eating/exercise for several months now and after 6 weeks holding steady, he just dropped two pounds in the last 2 weeks.)

    ~~Veronica
  • Beefyg
    Beefyg Posts: 27
    Hi Vallejos6
    I think that is why my husband thinks I can lose more because when he started changing a few things in his diet he shed the weight. He lost over 30lbs in a few months.

    I am feeling much better about only shedding 1-2 lbs a week. Thanks!!
  • Sezmo83
    Sezmo83 Posts: 331 Member
    I seriously doubt you'll lose 5lbs a week to be honest. Where has he got this idea that you should be losing 5lbs every week anyway? They say up to 2lbs a week is healthy, I wouldn't even aim for more than that. As for "cheat" meals, it's never seemed to cause me problems to have one day a week where I'm more lenient about what I eat.
  • Atlantique
    Atlantique Posts: 2,484 Member
    You're husband is mistaken. You have so little weight to lose that the only way that you could lose 5 lbs per week would be to starve yourself and lose a great deal of muscle. Even then, it would be extremely hard to lose 5 lbs per week.

    I think men have a hard time understanding sometimes that women do not lose weight at the same rate as they do. But you are right and he is badly mistaken.
  • CherrySunday
    CherrySunday Posts: 301
    And your husband knows that it's harder for women to lose weight, right? We're predisposed to hold onto fat more than men, because we're the ones who give birth. Your hubby totally needs to chill out! Sorry if he's making you feel like you're not doing enough. I always say, if I'm not gaining then it's a win! Just keep doing what you're doing, and in time it will come off.
  • dawnw30
    dawnw30 Posts: 270
    I think it's unrealistic and also kinda mean of your hubby to say that. Why are you being so super strict? Do you plan on being like that for the rest of your life? If not then you're pushing too hard and may set yourself up for failure. Slow and steady - and realistic - win the race. Plus, the more weight you have lost the slower you begin to lose. You're doing awesome - there is no need for any negativity from anyone :flowerforyou:
  • NowGoWorkout
    NowGoWorkout Posts: 41
    ---First of all, I don't like your husband. Sorry, just my nature.

    ---Second of all, do the math for him, tell him that's a 14,000 calorie per week calorie deficit. Then ask him to get on board, and work at the same calorie deficit. BUT, let's make it fair, and do it at the right ratio. Figure out how much more percentage wise he weighs than you, and multiply that by your deficit. If he weighs 50% more, then his calorie deficit will need to be 21,000 per week.

    ---Finally, see how long he lasts at a 3000 k/cal a day deficit, essentially what he is asking you to do. Tell him best of luck from me.
  • kbanzhaf
    kbanzhaf Posts: 601 Member
    Hi,
    When I was actively losing a rather large amount of weight (72 pounds), it took me 15 months. That figures out to 5.5 pounds a MONTH, not week.
    Because I took it off slowly, I've managed to keep more than 60 of it off for 4+ years, and in all honesty, I was probably too thin for awhile. I look better now (or so I'm told), but that being said, I'd like to lose and keep off five once again. I initially lost 72, gained 22 of it back, and have no lost 8-10 or so of that amount. I range between 135-140, but would like to be between 130-135.
    Five pounds a week is not only unrealistic, it is unhealthy. Weight loss is a marathon, not a sprint.
    Kaye
  • theresa7576
    theresa7576 Posts: 46 Member
    5 a week is NOT healthy.. 5 the first week is water. Tell him to lose 5 pounds next week if he thinks it is so easy.
  • Beefyg
    Beefyg Posts: 27
    You all are the best! I know I am hard on myself and really want to lose the weight BUT I don't want to do anything unhealthy. :smile:
  • NowGoWorkout
    NowGoWorkout Posts: 41
    You do know the simple science behind my post? 3500 calories per pound - your husband needs to think through what he's saying. What's your daily intake average and daily average burn?
    You all are the best! I know I am hard on myself and really want to lose the weight BUT I don't want to do anything unhealthy. :smile:
  • fteale
    fteale Posts: 5,310 Member
    You can't lose 5lbs a week. You just can't. No one can healthily.

    I am losing between 1lb and nothing each week atm, working out ALL THE TIME (at least 55 mins a day, hard), and eating clean, netting 1000-1200 cals.
  • live2smyle
    live2smyle Posts: 592 Member
    ---First of all, I don't like your husband. Sorry, just my nature.

    ---Second of all, do the math for him, tell him that's a 14,000 calorie per week calorie deficit. Then ask him to get on board, and work at the same calorie deficit. BUT, let's make it fair, and do it at the right ratio. Figure out how much more percentage wise he weighs than you, and multiply that by your deficit. If he weighs 50% more, then his calorie deficit will need to be 21,000 per week.

    ---Finally, see how long he lasts at a 3000 k/cal a day deficit, essentially what he is asking you to do. Tell him best of luck from me.
    This!!!!
  • jdm_taco
    jdm_taco Posts: 999 Member
    He must not realize that is a lot of weight to lose. Take a five pound weight and drop it on his nuts so he knows that it is a lot of weight. :laugh:
  • NowGoWorkout
    NowGoWorkout Posts: 41
    That may have been one of the top 5 funniest things I've heard this year!
    He must not realize that is a lot of weight to lose. Take a five pound weight and drop it on his nuts so he knows that it is a lot of weight. :laugh:
  • JenniCH
    JenniCH Posts: 74
    My soon-to-be husband knows that the only response I need in regards to weight is "I'm proud of you, always" and a hug or kiss. Tell your husband that this journey will be A LOT easier and happier for you if he is just simply supportive... as everyone else has said - women store and lose weight differently than men -- and even further each woman is different... even if you only lost 1/2 a pound week or less he should just be supportive that you are being healthy... each week will be different and I'm sure if any of us could just magically will our bodies to shed 5lbs of fat per week on command none of us would be here :)
  • Beefyg
    Beefyg Posts: 27
    :laugh:
    That may have been one of the top 5 funniest things I've heard this year!
    He must not realize that is a lot of weight to lose. Take a five pound weight and drop it on his nuts so he knows that it is a lot of weight. :laugh:
  • littlemissanguissette
    littlemissanguissette Posts: 248 Member
    ---First of all, I don't like your husband. Sorry, just my nature.

    ---Second of all, do the math for him, tell him that's a 14,000 calorie per week calorie deficit. Then ask him to get on board, and work at the same calorie deficit. BUT, let's make it fair, and do it at the right ratio. Figure out how much more percentage wise he weighs than you, and multiply that by your deficit. If he weighs 50% more, then his calorie deficit will need to be 21,000 per week.

    ---Finally, see how long he lasts at a 3000 k/cal a day deficit, essentially what he is asking you to do. Tell him best of luck from me.

    Where is the like button when I need it?!
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    5 pounds a week isn't reality - not healthy and probably not possible. Stick to what you are doing. Sounds like you are doing great!
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