diet failing because I am not motivated

darkriver2012
darkriver2012 Posts: 21 Member
edited November 16 in Health and Weight Loss
I have using this app for two years and I am struggling to stick to anything. I have made some minor changes switching from white bread to brown, white pasta to wholewheat
I don't drink full fat milk, coke but I just binge
How can I stay motivated.
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Replies

  • kikichewie
    kikichewie Posts: 276 Member
    Well, you have to really want it. Whatever "it" is for you. Obviously right now you actually want to stay the same as you are now for whatever reason. Motivation comes from within. When you really want it, you'll do whatever it takes. Pretty simple really.
  • reddincr
    reddincr Posts: 2 Member
    Honestly the way I did it was started off with a little juice reboot. Only for 3 days, That gave me the kick i needed because I saw progress. Maybe get someone else involved as well to help with the motivation. Hope this helps and hope you get the results you are looking for.
  • soccerkon26
    soccerkon26 Posts: 596 Member
    Some people are going to post with some great advice, but unless you are committed and really want to make a change, then it won't happen unless you're ready!

    There are always things you can do in order to make it less likely you'll binge.

    For example, I eat chocolate every day in moderation, but I CANNOT eat cookies and chips in moderation. So I don't buy any so I won't have the temptation. Or I would be setting myself up for failure.

    Also, my binging usually happens at night. So I save a lot of calories (about 300-400) for my snacks after dinner. That way I am eating less during the day because I always get those cravings at night.
  • Camo_xxx
    Camo_xxx Posts: 1,082 Member
    Do you understand the principal of CiCO ?

    Perhaps you do not stick to anything because "anything " isn't what works and if something isn't working it isn't worth sticking to.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    What do you hope to get out of all this when you are done? Are you confident that you could make goal?
  • jasmineruth
    jasmineruth Posts: 88 Member
    Do you log at a deficit and weigh all of your food? Do you try to make your week still balance out even when you binge? How often do you binge? Over the two years how many days have you logged everything that you have eaten? What motivates you in other areas of your life? I feel motivated when I see it working. It works when you do it. Everyone is motivated in different ways.
  • darkriver2012
    darkriver2012 Posts: 21 Member
    I am currently in a stressful situation and I wake up fine and by lunch time I indulge. I want to lose weight because of my health and know it's playing a part of me being ill. I just fall to my old habits.
  • Laurend224
    Laurend224 Posts: 1,748 Member
    You have to decide that you want to do it, that it's worth the doing, and hold yourself accountable for the doing of it. Nobody can give you that answer, you have to look to yourself for that.

    And, if you aren't ready, go get your head right, come back, and get after it! And log, log the good days, the bad days, the binges, all of it, to the point where it becomes such a habit, that habit will see you through the days where your motivation is flagging.
  • darkriver2012
    darkriver2012 Posts: 21 Member
    Do you log at a deficit and weigh all of your food? Do you try to make your week still balance out even when you binge? How often do you binge? Over the two years how many days have you logged everything that you have eaten? What motivates you in other areas of your life? I feel motivated when I see it working. It works when you do it. Everyone is motivated in different ways.
    My daughter is my key motivation. I am a single parent and I do want to be healthy for her sake as I want to be able to chase after her. I think I have logged everything once or twice.

  • darkriver2012
    darkriver2012 Posts: 21 Member
    Also what does it mean when you say deficit
  • Laurend224
    Laurend224 Posts: 1,748 Member
    Eating fewer calories than you burn in a day.
  • darkriver2012
    darkriver2012 Posts: 21 Member
    Well I had a goal of 1500 and think we burn more than that.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    edited April 2015
    Some people are going to post with some great advice, but unless you are committed and really want to make a change, then it won't happen unless you're ready!

    There are always things you can do in order to make it less likely you'll binge.

    For example, I eat chocolate every day in moderation, but I CANNOT eat cookies and chips in moderation. So I don't buy any so I won't have the temptation. Or I would be setting myself up for failure.

    Also, my binging usually happens at night. So I save a lot of calories (about 300-400) for my snacks after dinner. That way I am eating less during the day because I always get those cravings at night.

    This +1 you have to commit in the first place. You dont sound as though you are. Think it through and decide whether you are willing to do what it takes. If you start wih learning the essentials of deficit control and he figure out how you cna make a plan which you can sustain might work beter for you.

    Motivation stems from the reasons you want to lose weight and the effort you will need to put in to achieve it. Its what drives you to do things. Once you start a plan that works and get some victories it becomes easier as success will build your confidence your plan will work and you can do it (you can). Have a think about it and whether you are willing to do what it takes.

    Btw if you wanted to sort the issue out then you could do this in c 30 weeks or get very close. Thats not long and very achievable.
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
    edited April 2015
    Losing weight is about eating less calories than you're burning. Switching from white to whole wheat bread and pasta won't do anything unless you're also eating less bread and pasta.

    Motivation comes from within. No one can give you motivation although we can tell you what motivates us and maybe some of it will resonate enough with you to motivate you, too. You have to want the change badly enough to be motivated to do what's necessary to create that change. Right now, it doesn't sound like that's the case. And that's fine.

    Seriously. I mean that. You have a goal to lose 30 pounds. That's not life threatening extra weight so it's likely that you think you want to look better and feel better by losing those pounds. If you don't want that thinner body more than you want to binge on food then accept that fact and go on with your life; no guilt. If however, you're ready to make the sacrifices and put in the work necessary to lose that 30 pounds then you know what you need to do.

    Whatever you decide, I wish you the best!
  • PeachyPlum
    PeachyPlum Posts: 1,243 Member
    My daughter is my key motivation. I am a single parent and I do want to be healthy for her sake as I want to be able to chase after her. I think I have logged everything once or twice.

    Every time you're about to eat something that will take you over your calorie goal, ask yourself "Do I want to be able to play with my daughter, or do I want these cookies?"

    You need to decide where your priorities are. This may mean getting some counseling or therapy to work through some food issues, if you have a tendency to binge.
  • Camo_xxx
    Camo_xxx Posts: 1,082 Member
    edited April 2015
    Also what does it mean when you say deficit

    A deficit is why your body loses fat.

    You are going to read a lot of post in here and most will have great tid bits of how this all works , and in reality it is very simple but if you want to be successful at losing the weight and achieving your goal then you should educate yourself on the process.

    Please do yourself and your daughter a favor and take the time to read the link I post below. . knowing how and why you lose weight will give you the tools to Stay motivated.
    http://www.acaloriecounter.com/diet/
  • DaneanP
    DaneanP Posts: 433 Member
    Motivation for me is built on a succession of smaller goals met. I'm doing it differently this time. Slow and steady is my mantra. And every week when another pound is gone, I am instantly motivated for the next pound gone.
  • Ran90
    Ran90 Posts: 4 Member
    What works for me is a healthy dose of self-loathing.
  • scottacular
    scottacular Posts: 597 Member
    edited April 2015
    So many people come on here asking about motivation, it's not some magic thing you can find from elsewhere - motivation is entirely down to you. It just depends entirely on how much you want something. Picture your two options, being unhealthy or healthy. What does each option require, what does each option do for you and those around you. Being healthy requires only small, gradual changes and time. You have a lot of time, and small changes are easy - especially when they lead to big, positive changes. The difference between healthy and unhealthy takes so little, but gives you so much.
  • darkriver2012
    darkriver2012 Posts: 21 Member
    Camo_xxx wrote: »
    Also what does it mean when you say deficit

    A deficit is why your body loses fat.

    You are going to read a lot of post in here and most will have great tid bits of how this all works , and in reality it is very simple but if you want to be successful at losing the weight and achieving your goal then you should educate yourself on the process.

    Please do yourself and your daughter a favor and take the time to read the link I post below. . knowing how and why you lose weight will give you the tools to Stay motivated.
    http://www.acaloriecounter.com/diet/
    I am currently in a stressful situation and I wake up fine and by lunch time I indulge. I want to lose weight because of my health and know it's playing a part of me being ill. I just fall to my old habits.

    When you say you indulge by lunchtime, what does that mean, exactly? Are you eating all your calories by then? Just too large a portion of your calories? Eating things you don't want to eat?

    I end up eating chocolate and crisps. I can't stop at one it's has two or three.
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
    edited April 2015
    Also what does it mean when you say deficit
    Well I had a goal of 1500 and think we burn more than that.

    A deficit means less than... in other words, you're eating less calories than you're burning so you're in a deficit. Or you spent more money than you had in your bank account so now you're in a deficit. :smile:

    You think you burn more than that or you know you do? MFP will give you a good idea of how much an average person of your height, weight, age and gender will burn. It's good for a start but results will tell the truth.

    If you really want to do this, get into the habit of logging everything in MFP. If you don't own a kitchen scale, buy one and use it for almost everything. Even peanut butter and salad dressing can be weighed, anything which shows serving sizes in grams can be. Stay as close to your calorie goal as possible every day.

    Throw out the junk food (or at least finish it off) and don't buy any more. Buy snacks which are lower in calories and only keep a few days' worth in the house. You can't binge on what isn't there and binging on raw veggies never got anyone fat.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    My daughter is my key motivation. I am a single parent and I do want to be healthy for her sake as I want to be able to chase after her. I think I have logged everything once or twice.

    I raised my children as a single parent, so I understand the primal desire to "be there" for your daughter. My adult children to this day fuss over my health and want me to have a long, healthy, and vibrant retirement. The twin motivators for them is that they don't want to be saddled with my care, and they shudder at the thought of not having me be around for moral support. I'm a great mom. It's gratifying to know I'd be missed.

    Here's the problem with "for my health" as a motivation. It's ambiguous and long-term. Our hedonistic motivation center just isn't jazzed with that sort of reward. So you need some middling rewards to work towards that make the larger goal achievable.

    Commit to a two week behavioral goal, like, "log daily", then evaluate the results. What did you learn about your eating habits? What do you want to change? Then start a new goal based on what you learned, and re-evaluate. Repeat as often as you like.

    I think if it is very important to be mobile to keep up with your munchkin, to have an activity goal to match. For instance, can you get down and up from a crouching position in three seconds? How far can you run without getting winded? If not, there are exercises that can get you there in an amazingly short period of time. Within weeks of me starting a yoga class, I was able to hoist myself out of a swimming pool, and swoop down to pick up a crumb in my kitchen. Huge achievements for me!

    For running exercise, a healthy round of tag with the little one at a local park might do the trick. If you know "tag day" is coming, you may want to prepare with a little treadmill action to get your cardiovascular system going.
  • darkriver2012
    darkriver2012 Posts: 21 Member
    I have a heart disabilities and my little girl is incredibly active. I had to run after her yesterday when she tried escaping from the back garden and I could barely breath afterwards. Also I have a pedometer app that seems to be a lot more accurate then the others.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    @darkriver2012 , have you been cleared for exercise? If so, a gradual regimen of walking and running could really help.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    OP do you think you know what you are doing and you understand the basics of weight loss and what you should be doing? Am getting the impression you dont have a clear understanding. Try eading this
    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1

    And then maybe getting some experienced friends who can assist you.

    You have 2 important motivators, so far . Those are your own health and for your daughters sake. Arent they important enough to you that you are prepared to eat a little less so you will lose weight? One of the reasons I started was for my own health because id rather not have the very real extra risks that come with the weight.

    Good luck anyway
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    herrspoons wrote: »
    If you've not learned what to do in two years then I'm not sure what advice we can offer you.

    You either want this or you don't.

    This. ^^^

    OP, you must make a decision that you want to lose weight and then use the tools to do so. It's really up to you.
  • azulvioleta6
    azulvioleta6 Posts: 4,195 Member
    Good for you for owning it and not blaming it on other things or other people. That is refreshing.

    I wonder how much exercise you are able to do and if you could find a way to make exercise social. Sometimes when you can walk with a friend or go to a class where people expect you to show up, that helps with motivation. Exercise helps with stress. I think that a lot of us are less likely to put bad stuff in our bodies when we've invested a lot of effort into fitness.

    The other thing that I wonder is if you could be a little bit depressed. Sometimes that can be a factor when motivation and follow-through are difficult.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    How can I stay motivated.

    You can't.

    Nobody can.

    Long term success isn't about motivation, it's about discipline.


  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    I don't know about discipline. I've had to be very disciplined to keep at this, but I also know why I am doing it.

    Funny story. Hubby finally decided this week to get more active and asked me how he could get motivated. I pulled out a calendar, wrote up a plan for him, and asked him to commit to going to the gym this past Tuesday. There was no navel gazing or deep-down gut-pulling, just do. He got there; he did it. He did more than he intended. I followed up by asking about all the good feelings he had post-workout. I want him to remember the rewards so it gets a little easier this coming Tuesday.

    So I'd say the knowing my "why" got me moving, and plain old doing gets me out the door. I sit down at least once every couple weeks and readjust my plan as needed. If anything is getting old, I modify it or drop it.
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