I don't know how to get back my motivation...
abetterluke
Posts: 625 Member
So a short recap of my weight loss history for you guys --
I've been doing this my whole adult life pretty much but since 2010 or so I've gotten serious. I was a part of this site for a long time (under a different username) and lost a good amount of weight. At one point I had lost nearly 30 lbs and was about to dip below 200 lbs for the first time in years. At that point in time I was so incredibly motivated nothing could have stopped me...at least until one day when I seemed to hit a mental block and just said "screw it" and started eating like crap again and not exercising. That has happened twice since 2010.
Fast forward a few years and I've gone from around 200 lbs at my best to the highest weight I've ever been which is where I am currently -- around 240-245 lbs. I have no excuses for eating like crap. I have decent access to fresh produce, a budget that allows for it, and the ability to be active in my free time. Yet I can't bring myself to do it. I can't get back that motivation and drive I had before and I don't know what to do about it. My clothes aren't fitting right. I feel like crap. I was recently diagnosed with asthma (which they say was not due to my weight but I'm not certain). I have major back problem that the doctor told me are definitely caused by my weight.
I need help.
I've been doing this my whole adult life pretty much but since 2010 or so I've gotten serious. I was a part of this site for a long time (under a different username) and lost a good amount of weight. At one point I had lost nearly 30 lbs and was about to dip below 200 lbs for the first time in years. At that point in time I was so incredibly motivated nothing could have stopped me...at least until one day when I seemed to hit a mental block and just said "screw it" and started eating like crap again and not exercising. That has happened twice since 2010.
Fast forward a few years and I've gone from around 200 lbs at my best to the highest weight I've ever been which is where I am currently -- around 240-245 lbs. I have no excuses for eating like crap. I have decent access to fresh produce, a budget that allows for it, and the ability to be active in my free time. Yet I can't bring myself to do it. I can't get back that motivation and drive I had before and I don't know what to do about it. My clothes aren't fitting right. I feel like crap. I was recently diagnosed with asthma (which they say was not due to my weight but I'm not certain). I have major back problem that the doctor told me are definitely caused by my weight.
I need help.
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Replies
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I should also note that I can't justify the cost of a gym membership due to other expenses at the moment. I was very successful doing Couch To 5k before and will likely do it again. I do struggle with finding exercises I enjoy however.0
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lukestoofat wrote: »So a short recap of my weight loss history for you guys --
Yet I can't bring myself to do it. I can't get back that motivation and drive I had before and I don't know what to do about it.
I need help.
You see this pretty frequently of people who accomplished great results and had what we can call a relapse.
Part of the problem is that your relying on "motivation" rather than making it a task or duty to be completed. See, I may not feel motivated to brush my teeth in the morning, but it's apart of my morning task. I never wake "pumped up" about brushing my teeth but I do it regardless because it's apart of my plan.
When were motivated to workout and live a healthy lifestyle its great. But at the end of the day motivation is limited. Self control is limited. What sustains us is a game plan for those down times. When I don't feel like working out what's the game plan. When I don't feel like eating healthy what's the game plan.
Putting yourself in a position where you have to rely on motivation to accomplish a healthy life style is doing a disservice you. Take out a hour one day, sit down and plot out your week. What days and times are you going to workout. What workouts are you going to do. Then what are you going to eat that week Sun - Sat. Its takes a little planning but makes all the difference. And then systematical follow your plan. This will you help remove the motivation factor some.
The other part of the problem is the "road block" of remembering what I use to be able to do. I see this a lot in athletes. When we fall off our workouts and proper eating our level of physical fitness takes a hit. Though our mind remembers and relishes what we use to be able to do.
Many times its the thought of how challenging your workouts use to be that discourages us from getting started again. Because some where deep in our minds we think we have to start off performing workouts we did when we were at our best. Not true.
Start from the beginning again. Be patient with your self. Start off doing work outs you know you can master. Go for a brisk 30 minute walk. Instead of running. Do 20 crunches instead of 100. Start of doing 5 modified push ups instead of 30 military.
All of these things will begin to fill your motivation tank again. What you'll begin to notice is as you continue to successfully complete workouts. You'll begin to challenge yourself more and more. Steadily increasing the difficulties of your workout, watching your motivation build momentum and beginning to revive!
Hope this help. Good luck!
Make sure to friend Me.
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Kwan that post was exactly what I needed. You are right -- motivation is limited and it should be something I just "do". No different than brushing my teeth or taking a shower. I appreciate your help. I don't know why I never thought of it that way but it makes complete sense.
And yes I'll friend you shortly
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Many people don't find motivation again because of failure from previous attempts. The truth is that to stay on the path for life, it's gotta be a lifestyle you can do for life.
I always hear that people were doing great, then they went back to eating crap and regained. So if you didn't involve "crap" in your previous go's at weight loss, then involve it now with the idea of learning how to control how much of it you eat.
Many of clients are so glad that I've NEVER told them that they can't have what they like to eat. Consequently practically all of them lost weight and kept it off from learning how to eat well as well as involve the stuff they enjoy.
As for exercise, it's for health and fitness and crazy regimens aren't needed. I find that people that enjoy doing things outside do really well with just walking and biking. You DON'T need strenuous exercise to lose and maintain weight.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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lukestoofat wrote: »Kwan that post was exactly what I needed. You are right -- motivation is limited and it should be something I just "do". No different than brushing my teeth or taking a shower. I appreciate your help. I don't know why I never thought of it that way but it makes complete sense.
And yes I'll friend you shortly
Awesome!!!0 -
As for exercise, it's for health and fitness and crazy regimens aren't needed. I find that people that enjoy doing things outside do really well with just walking and biking. You DON'T need strenuous exercise to lose and maintain weight.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
I agree. That's a good point.
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Many people don't find motivation again because of failure from previous attempts. The truth is that to stay on the path for life, it's gotta be a lifestyle you can do for life.
I always hear that people were doing great, then they went back to eating crap and regained. So if you didn't involve "crap" in your previous go's at weight loss, then involve it now with the idea of learning how to control how much of it you eat.
Many of clients are so glad that I've NEVER told them that they can't have what they like to eat. Consequently practically all of them lost weight and kept it off from learning how to eat well as well as involve the stuff they enjoy.
As for exercise, it's for health and fitness and crazy regimens aren't needed. I find that people that enjoy doing things outside do really well with just walking and biking. You DON'T need strenuous exercise to lose and maintain weight.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
My trainer took that approach with me and I have been so successful. I have learned to build in wing nights, pizza and beer nights or Lord forbid a piece of cake.
I think finding something fun to do outside is a great suggestion. Perhaps try walking and then add in some body weight exercises along your walking route. I have seen tons of people do that and I have even done the same thing. I will run (I love to run), then stop and do 25 dips if there is a park bench. Then I will run to the next park bench and do 30 step ups. You get the idea. There are tons of things to do that are free and use body weight.
Good luck!
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I have learned to just take the emotion out of it and leave it to the numbers. Calories in, calories out. As long as I'm creating a deficit, I lose. People want a miracle pill or a quick fix, but it just comes down to those basics, for me. There are days when my heart isn't in it, where I have no motivation or passion, but I just keep plugging away. It has helped me to get my food in order first, then just add in exercise when I can. A big trick that works for me is planning my day out the night before. I plug in everything I plan to eat and pack a lunch bag for work. Then I just have to stick to my plan the next day. If I'm tempted by treats in the office or go off the rails a bit for dinner, then I try to sneak in a walk or a bike ride to accommodate for it. I've slowly lost over 20 pounds, just being sensible. My diary is open and honest if you want to friend me. Good luck!0
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lukestoofat wrote: »So a short recap of my weight loss history for you guys --
Yet I can't bring myself to do it. I can't get back that motivation and drive I had before and I don't know what to do about it.
I need help.
You see this pretty frequently of people who accomplished great results and had what we can call a relapse.
Part of the problem is that your relying on "motivation" rather than making it a task or duty to be completed. See, I may not feel motivated to brush my teeth in the morning, but it's apart of my morning task. I never wake "pumped up" about brushing my teeth but I do it regardless because it's apart of my plan.
When were motivated to workout and live a healthy lifestyle its great. But at the end of the day motivation is limited. Self control is limited. What sustains us is a game plan for those down times. When I don't feel like working out what's the game plan. When I don't feel like eating healthy what's the game plan.
Putting yourself in a position where you have to rely on motivation to accomplish a healthy life style is doing a disservice you. Take out a hour one day, sit down and plot out your week. What days and times are you going to workout. What workouts are you going to do. Then what are you going to eat that week Sun - Sat. Its takes a little planning but makes all the difference. And then systematical follow your plan. This will you help remove the motivation factor some.
The other part of the problem is the "road block" of remembering what I use to be able to do. I see this a lot in athletes. When we fall off our workouts and proper eating our level of physical fitness takes a hit. Though our mind remembers and relishes what we use to be able to do.
Many times its the thought of how challenging your workouts use to be that discourages us from getting started again. Because some where deep in our minds we think we have to start off performing workouts we did when we were at our best. Not true.
Start from the beginning again. Be patient with your self. Start off doing work outs you know you can master. Go for a brisk 30 minute walk. Instead of running. Do 20 crunches instead of 100. Start of doing 5 modified push ups instead of 30 military.
All of these things will begin to fill your motivation tank again. What you'll begin to notice is as you continue to successfully complete workouts. You'll begin to challenge yourself more and more. Steadily increasing the difficulties of your workout, watching your motivation build momentum and beginning to revive!
Hope this help. Good luck!
Make sure to friend Me.
Really good advice. Once I started relying on dedication rather than motivation, it made a HUGE difference in my ability to stick with a health plan.
I look at it like going to work - some days I'd rather stay home and sleep and watch tv/eat a lot and don't exercise - but it's a part of my life and I realize that the consequences of not going and doing, outweigh by far the comfort I give up by going/doing.
Stop looking at it as how you feel - look at it as what you DO. You can do it, and stick with it, but only if you make a decision and commit to it regardless of your level of motivation at the time.
And very important - you WILL mess up. You will eat too much, or binge, or fall off for a couple of days, or not exercise as hard as you want to, or skip a few workouts. This is going to happen throughout the course of your life. DO NOT LET IT DEFINE YOU. It's not a bad thing to not be perfect. Just make sure that you get right back up and do what you set out to do. Remove the guilt, and learn from it, and move on, and use what you've learned to help you make better choices in the future.
Wishing you lots of health and happiness!
PS Change your name. Force yourself to do this from a place of self-love and not self-loathing. It really, really makes all the difference.0 -
@royaldrea nice!0
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@royaldrea your post was awesome thank you. I will consider changing my name as well truth be told I want my old username back but it still won't let me use it. 0
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forget motivation don't depend on it. i treat it like a bonus. if it comes great but i don't count on it.
in my opinion digging deep and understanding why you don't want to take care of yourself is the real work. not the food plan or exercise plan. those will be by-products when you figure out the why in the first place. i would spend some time digging around in yourself. Geneen Roth writes fantastic on the subject if you need somewhere to start.
it will save you a lot of heartache and yo-yoing in the long run if you start your "head work" now
i wish i understood this a decade ago!
good luck!0 -
This is a really helpful thread for me too! I had a baby a year ago and stopped all exercise/healthy eating and am now finding it really difficult to get back into. Today is day 1 and reading all your comments has helped boost my determination! Thank you0
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Regardless if we like it or not sometimes we just have to march. so march.0
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The thing that motivates me was health. Do you wnat to be around for your boys and family, because you are putting yourself at much higher risk of stroke, diabetes, cancer a heart attack etc. Thats the risk you run.
Spend some time getting the right mindset and devising a plan that will work for you. I was near to where you are when I started, but just got on with it am in a much better place now. One of my rationales that I wanted to lose the weight and didnt want to yo yo, so I decided to get on with it and commit.0 -
The thing that motivates me was health. Do you wnat to be around for your boys and family, because you are putting yourself at much higher risk of stroke, diabetes, cancer a heart attack etc. Thats the risk you run.
Spend some time getting the right mindset and devising a plan that will work for you. I was near to where you are when I started, but just got on with it am in a much better place now. One of my rationales that I wanted to lose the weight and didnt want to yo yo, so I decided to get on with it and commit.
That's a good way of looking at it. Before I had my daughter. I used to stay fit and eat well to look good but I think my priorities have changed now so leading a healthy lifestyle for the sake of my daughter is a good incentive0
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