Picky eater who hates cooking

Here's a proposal.

Serve a meal. If they don't like it they can make their own or starve. Stop buying crap and give them little choice.

You aren't doing them any favours by letting them eat that constantly either.

There *must* be something that you will all eat that will be a healthy compromise, you just need to look harder.

By family, do you mean husband/kid? or other family members?

Sounds like you need to have a serious conversation with your fiance then.

You are setting up your child's eating habits for life, and he is currently on the same "I don't like vegetables" path that you are on. Kids aren't born with pre-conceived ideas of what is good/bad. Japanese kids aren't born with an inherent liking of miso and raw fish, Indian kids aren't born with an inherent liking of strong spices. They eat these things because that is what the family eats, over time they grow accustomed to them and then they prefer them over other foods.

Your kid has learned a preference for pizza and cheeseburgers from you (both of you). You are currently in a position to change that, but you will need to give your fiance a kick up the bum. Of course given the option kids will choose the fat laden/sugary option. It's your responsibility as a parent to ensure that they get other things too and that they learn to like other things.

7 isn't too young to cook, get him to cook with you. Kids are much more likely to eat foods that they've made, so make it together. Start with healthier home-made versions of his 'normal' foods, and then expand the flavour range. Make your own burgers from lean beef, onions, a little egg to bind and some seasoning. It's simple and takes minutes. "forget" to buy buns to go with the burgers and work together to come up with an alternative based on the healthier options you have in the fridge. Experiment with different textures for foods... many kids aren't so keen on boiled carrots, but they often like finely grated raw carrot... the sweetness and fine texture appeals more. Get him involved and see if you can make "scenes" or "animals" or whatever out of the food, make it fun.

In regards to yourself... Your health is not great for your age (cholesterol wise anyway). If you care about it, then fix it regardless of everyone else.

Really? I hate fruits and vegetables. Good Lord grow up.

What I find shocking is that you consider the food that you eat at home not healthy for you, and wonder how often you should be eatign it, but you are ok with your own child living on this diet??? This makes no sense. Either you believe your household lives on a balanced and healthy diet (by your standards) so you can eat the same food, or you think the current diet is not ok, so your child at least deserves a change ASAP. If eating choices caused health issues for you at 24, the same eating choices cannot be healthy for your child. Even if a crappy diet makes him happy and stops whining.

Honestly, as a mother of 3 myself, I think it is about changing your attitude. I cook for 5. We do not have the same tastes. If I had to come up with balanced and affordable meals and expect everyone to be happy everyday, I would have gone crazy a long time ago. You make a weekly meal plan, that you consider acceptable (healthwise and within budget). You involve your kid by offering simple choices, like "we are having soup tomorrow, do you want pea soup or bean soup?" or "do you want lettuce or tomato with your burger" and by going shopping together, where he can choose between acceptable alternatives (if you go shopping for fruit, he has to choose a fruit, not candy instead). Then you cook and serve the meal and stop debating about it. No alternative meals, no take away when the meal is not to the kid's taste, no snacks to replace meals, no arguing because the food is not everyone's favourite meal. There is more to health than weight.

I was a picky eater. Some would say I still am, but I have improved vastly. Honestly, the thing that helped the most with improving it was cooking things myself from scratch. And challenging myself to try new things at least 5 times before dismissing them. Some things I will never like (ie, prawns - bleugh), but I now eat loads of chicken, beef, bacon, tomatoes, peppers, curries etc (yep, all things I 'didn't like' before). The more I have tried the easier it has become to try something else, as the anxiety I used to felt is just melting away. Stick at it, and you'll get there.

Start with simple things, like omelettes and a side salad, or a jacket potato with a healthy filling (and a side salad). Have you tried all varieties of lettuce and salad leaves? They vary a lot in flavour and texture so you might be able to find one you like.

As for finding recipes, try this: http://www.supercook.com/#/recipes/All%20recipes You can enter the ingredients you have (in your case, that you know everyone will like) and will give you a list of recipes that you make with those ingredients.

Hope that helps

chelsmaee7 wrote: »

Is it possible to lose weight when you hate most vegetables and can't handle eating a lot of fruit and also happen to hate cooking which means loving sandwiches? That's probably a crazy question but really I only like a few vegetables like green beans, peas, corn, and a few others. I hate lettuce, I keep attempting to eat it but still just can't get past the texture of it. My family all have different tastes so making a home cooked meal every night is nearly impossible because no one likes the same things and my fiancé basically lives on pizza or hamburgers. He also works as a butcher so he is constantly bringing home meat and we grill at least every other day. I guess my few questions would be...

How often on average is it okay to eat bread/buns? I love tuna sandwiches and egg (hard boiled and scrambled) sandwiches.

Are burgers extremely unhealthy? Is there anyway to make it healthier? What other foods do you enjoy cooked on the grill? How do you make it through the grilling season?

And any other advice you may be able to offer!! What I eat seems to be one of my biggest issues and I have also recently been put on meds for high cholesterol (I'm only 24) but I've decided to try to get it down myself over the summer.

Eating burgers and sandwiches is not a problem, as long as your nutritional needs are being met in terms of fiber, iron, vitamins, minerals, etc. Your high cholesterol is a bit of a red flag, if it's not genetic. Try switching to whole grain bread/rolls as a start. Note- not whole wheat, whole grain. Try more variety in vegetables. So you like beans, you may like lentils, chickpeas, and other legumes.

chelsmaee7 wrote: »

Is it possible to lose weight when you hate most vegetables and can't handle eating a lot of fruit and also happen to hate cooking which means loving sandwiches? That's probably a crazy question but really I only like a few vegetables like green beans, peas, corn, and a few others. I hate lettuce, I keep attempting to eat it but still just can't get past the texture of it. My family all have different tastes so making a home cooked meal every night is nearly impossible because no one likes the same things and my fiancé basically lives on pizza or hamburgers. He also works as a butcher so he is constantly bringing home meat and we grill at least every other day. I guess my few questions would be...

How often on average is it okay to eat bread/buns? I love tuna sandwiches and egg (hard boiled and scrambled) sandwiches.

Are burgers extremely unhealthy? Is there anyway to make it healthier? What other foods do you enjoy cooked on the grill? How do you make it through the grilling season?

And any other advice you may be able to offer!! What I eat seems to be one of my biggest issues and I have also recently been put on meds for high cholesterol (I'm only 24) but I've decided to try to get it down myself over the summer.

I think you're over-complicating this.

1. It's possible to lose weight eating any food. So questions like "can I have bread / how often / can I grill / are hamburgers terrible / etc" are a waste of time and energy. All foods are fine, it's fine. Should you eat a burger every 5 minutes? No. Should you eat consistently over the calorie target you set up on MFP? No. Otherwise, eat, enjoy life, try to pick foods you like, that are filling and keep you feeling good. As you go on, if you want to, start paying more attention to the nutrition info -- ex, take notice if you seem to be low on protein over time. This is not a thing you'd know right now, though, and it's not a thing you MUST pay attention to to succeed. (The vast majority of people do not track their food, they just eat, just because you've started tracking doesn't mean you have to try to perfect your eating based on ever-changing and often contradictory advice on what's "healthy".)

*Cholesterol issues aside. That may take special management, which I don't know enough about. But you can substitute foods for yourself easily enough. (See some of my tips below.)

2. Your fiance can **** well be supportive. That is one of the roles of a fiance. Do not order or nag him to not bring home "bad" foods (foods aren't bad or good) but just ask for some support so you can balance things more easily. BALANCE.

3. You sound like you like several vegetables, so I don't see the issue? Just rotate them...

4. Everyone liking different things is a really easy thing to get around, imo. Everyone likes burgers, yeah? Grill the burgers. Make a few different sides available -- the guys can toss up a salad, and you can throw a corn cob on the grill. That takes absolutely no extra effort! Your kid likes tomatoes, so have some cut tomatoes available in a tupperware to pull out, so he can top up his burger with veggies. You can choose whether or not to have the bun, based on whether it fits into your calories that day -- no one is forcing you to have the bun, a burger patty with a little tzatziki or something, and a corn on the cob, would be a nice meal. If people like different veggies, put different veggies on the grill... it's not like you're having to make 5 different lasagnas, it's like cutting up some broccoli and some cauliflower instead of just all extra broccoli. You can even put them in separate foil if people are of the "but your food touched my food" variety. Besides which, you can actually grill up more than one kind of meat, if you are say, trying to cut back on your red meat, so they can still have it most days, and you can have it SOME days, and just grill up a chicken breast or something on other days. Takes more planning at first to figure out and get used to buying, it's not as simple as "I'll grab a pizza", but it does not really add time in terms of cooking, ime.

5. It sounds to me like you are making your own breakfasts and lunches, yes? Less dependent on what others like/are eating? So plan ahead. Save some extra calories for that evening meal with the family, make your breakfasts and lunches lighter. One way might be to try to avoid bread at one or both of those meals, then you might be able to fit in the bread later, but there are lots of ways to trim calories.

6. Control your own portions. Cut your steak in half and eat across two days. Have fewer slices of pizza. Have the burger/sausage with no bun, or on a piece of toast. Fit in mayo/tzatziki/something, or skip, or use a low cal condiment. Skip the cheese. Make a higher % of your meal veggies. Cut calories from liquids (soda, juice, etc). Have days when you eat how you best like, as a treat. (So it's not "I can never have a burger on a bun again!!!" Just you know, maybe not every time.)

I grew up in a "one meal" household where I was a picky eater and so, I realized eventually, was my mom. My dad cooked "one meal" for everyone but I mean, I always had the flexibility. Salad was a bowl of lettuce, toppings done up but left on the cutting board (so we could use what we liked) and a few different dressings available in the fridge. Voila! Custom salads. He'd often prep a couple of veggies, maybe peas and beans (no tougher than prepping one), and if there were leftovers, all the better for the next day. Food was in the house -- don't like the veggies of the day, well, I could go get some pickles from the fridge or have fruit or a little more of one of the other things, or a slice of bread. It's not like my dad had to make a side for each of us, but yet we still were not forced to choke down foods we legitimately had trouble eating, and we still ate, and together, and well, so it can be done easily. My partner and I are not the same person, we eat different things sometimes, this is just common, and completely doable.

As I said, I think you're over-complicating it with these ideas, like that maybe bread is not okay, or maybe grilling everyday is not okay, or how would you ever lose weight eating pizza (even though people do), or that you're picky so it must be difficult, or that different people are different (shocker) so it must be a huge obstacle. It's just a perception that everyone must eat the same and the guys eat this way and so you must also, and you're stuck. Think of it like a challenge, or a creative problem, that will almost certainly lead to great things actually -- new foods, new meals, new ideas, broadened horizons, and lots of your usual favourites. Ask your fiance for support, you guys can brainstorm up awesome meals together. He can bring home *extra* food rather than substitute food he's not excited about. Try pre-logging some days to see what your ideas would look like in terms of calories. You can also create meals -- log a bunch of foods you'd eat together (eg. burger patty, bun, mayo, corn, butter) and use Quick Tools to create a meal, which saves it as a group. You can totally do this!

(Seconding the recommendations to set a small goal -- 0.5 lb to 1 lb a week, and to weigh all your foods. It will be really helpful not only for your progress, but for helping you fit in the foods you love. If you can weigh them, you'll *know* you have room for the steak or whatever, whereas if you're guessing, and trying to over-estimate, you might think you don't. Or think you do when you don't, and make no/slow progress.)