Totally lost motivation and hope

Carly666666
Carly666666 Posts: 8
edited September 27 in Introduce Yourself
So I was doing really well. I was going to gym 6 days a week and having two personal training sessions and eating pretty well. I also quit smoking and eased right back on drinking. With all this hard work my weight wasn't shifting so I stopped going to gym so much, started smoking again and am drinking on a nightly basis again. I feel like crap and now I'm sick which is another excuse why I can't go to gym. I really badly want to lose weight but desperately need some motivation :( Does anyone have any tips for when they fall off the wagon?
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Replies

  • jsoaper01
    jsoaper01 Posts: 99 Member
    Gather yourself and restart again.
  • rks6902
    rks6902 Posts: 29 Member
    Brush yourself off and get right back on. I deal with that too and lose motivation when I do not see results and it drives me nuts. If you are not feeling well enough to work out at least track your food and maybe take a walk to get some kind of moving in.
  • dls06
    dls06 Posts: 6,774 Member
    I agree don't use it as an excuse to keep it up. Pick yourself up and stick with it.
  • durhamity
    durhamity Posts: 174 Member
    You are never more than 1 meal away from perfect nutrition. :tongue:
  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,336 Member
    Get back to it again. BTW it is hard for us to help if we can't see your food diary.
  • MrsCon40
    MrsCon40 Posts: 2,351 Member
    You are never more than 1 meal away from perfect nutrition. :tongue:

    EXACTLY!

    Yes, you just have to start again. Now. Not 5 minutes from now - NOW!

    Everyone here wants you to succeed! :flowerforyou:
  • LauraLLee
    LauraLLee Posts: 210
    If you dont keep trying you will never do what you have set out to do. So get back up and try again!
  • edyarn
    edyarn Posts: 12
    Yep I agree! Just start from where you are :)

    And feel free to use your MFP friends for support - that's what we're here for!
  • Everyone falls off a horse at one point or another, its never stopped anyone from horseback riding after a quick break. Get back on that horse and continue on that goal.
  • nanmj
    nanmj Posts: 1
    as one of my fav songs by aaliyah says, "if at first you don't suceed...dust yourself off and try again, you can dust it off and try it again." The morning begins a whole new day!
  • melcowenfitness
    melcowenfitness Posts: 221 Member
    For me, the motivation came when I saw the results. Like you, I was going to the gym, eating well (or so I thought), but my scale was not budging. Started P90X, learned a lot about my nutrition, made changes little by little, and have lost 28 pounds.

    You just need to find what works for you. I credit my weight loss to great workout programs AND better nutritional habits.

    Hope that helps! Let me know if you want more details.
  • anacsitham5
    anacsitham5 Posts: 810 Member
    Only a suggestion, but don't try to do it all at once. It's too hard. I started losing weight first. When that became easier, then I added in exercising. Now I'm working on cutting out diet pop/soda. All baby steps but I never would have succeeded if I tried to do it all at once. It would have been too overwhelming. Try again. Don't give up. It will definately be worth it.
  • cathys01
    cathys01 Posts: 221
    Tomorrow is another day and another chance to start all over again. Take a moment, step back and remember why you joined up and wanted to lose the weight in the first place; just get those thoughts into your head and hopefully, it will help you. A bad time will pass if you let it go. Good luck and all the best.
  • I've found it difficult to quantify progress in terms of health, and it's easy to get demotivated when your weight or whatever measure you're using isn't changing despite your hard work. When i look in the mirror, I see the same pudgy guy I saw when I started working out.

    The one thing I've found that keeps me motivated is pictures of my progress. It definitely keeps me motivated and excited about taking care of myself.

    I weight the same amount in both pictures in this blog post: http://hamsy.tumblr.com/post/1601250085/progress5
    What you see in the mirror and even on the scale can be very deceiving; you need to find other ways of motivating yourself.
  • bluemax87
    bluemax87 Posts: 71
    So I was doing really well. I was going to gym 6 days a week and having two personal training sessions and eating pretty well. I also quit smoking and eased right back on drinking. With all this hard work my weight wasn't shifting so I stopped going to gym so much, started smoking again and am drinking on a nightly basis again. I feel like crap and now I'm sick which is another excuse why I can't go to gym. I really badly want to lose weight but desperately need some motivation :( Does anyone have any tips for when they fall off the wagon?

    What do you find fun or entertaining? You like music, right? What about that song you're trying to teach yourself on guitar? can't get it out of your head? If you have an iPod or mp3 player you could go for a short jog while listening to the song. You could use the workouts as a reward for something. Or use the completeion of the workout as the reward. Not too long ago, humans were capable of running antelope to death (google "humans running antelope to death"). At the end of the hunt, humans got dinner and a sense of self-accomplishment because they brought home food for the whole tribe. The hunters that chased the antelope down were 'heroes' because they kept the tribe fed for another few days. This feeling of happiness and accomplishment has been engrained into our DNA and almost everyone who goes to the gym feels a sens of accomplishment afterwards.

    Get yourself up out of your house and go do something! Find something fun and just go do it! go for a jog around the neighborhood and see all the people who live close to you. Go for a hike up a trail somewhere nearby and enjoy nature. If you have mountains nearby, go climb them! If you have lakes or ocean nearby, go for a swim. After you're done with a hard workout, treat yourself to a massage or simply a protein shake or maybe just a rental from the local movie store or netflix... that little bit of sacrifice you made to beat your body up deserves a little bit of reward!

    before long, the workout itsself will be it's own reward!
  • LuluGirl140
    LuluGirl140 Posts: 364 Member
    I was just like you at the beginning of this year!!!

    So, I joined MFP in January, and started doing the Insanity workouts. I was counting my calories and logging everything, and I gained 5 lbs in January. I didn't understand what I was doing wrong. I was under my calories every day, because I was burning 500+ calories/day, 6x/week. However....I was eating very poorly. I would stop at McDonald's and get a large coffee (with several creamer and sugar), and either the oatmeal or the parfait. This is how the rest of my day would go. So, while I was under calories, it was bad calories. So I gave up and went back to my old habits. Then I did alot of research. I found that although the parfait and oatmeal seemed healthy, they really weren't!!! So I started back up in April. Now granted, I haven't lost all that much weight, but I've lost tons of inches. I started Insanity again, and this time I'm being smarter about what I'm eating. Plus, I'm eating more frequently. For example: I have a protein shake for breakfast (8am). Then at 10am I have a piece of fruit. Then my lunch at 12 (usually a subway sandwich, or leftovers), then I have a granola bar at about 3, then another piece of fruit at 6, then another protein shake at about 8 - 9, depending on when I'm done with my workout. I have dropped a pant size, and feel that these are getting loose now too.

    Please don't completely give up. Research! Don't just look at the calories you're eating, look at the fat, carbs, etc. Look into healthy foods, snacks. Drink lots of water!! At first I had to really force myself to drink it, now I prefer it! I don't let myself drink less than 8 cups/day, and I try and get it all in before I leave work for the day. Remember, this isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle change. You want to be healthy so you can be around a long long time. It's not going to be easy. It won't be overnight, but you can do it. There's LOTS of motivation on here, so you came to the right place! Chin up, start fresh tomorrow!!!
  • TheLaser
    TheLaser Posts: 338 Member
    *Focus on how far you've come!

    *Focus on the non-scale victories (compliments from people noticing, clothes fitting differently, etc)

    *Take this slump as a time to learn about new foods, new exercises, and new daily strategies. Instead of going to the bar one night, you could spend that time learning

    *Give yourself a reward goal

    *Give yourself a little "pet project," e.g. substituting in one healthier, low-cal food per day, taking the stairs, etc)

    *Build exercise into your daily routine so that you can't avoid it and it feels off to do something else (I drive to the pool every day at the same time) Meet up with a workout friend to keep yourself to a commitment.

    *If you don't feel like exercising, tell yourself that you'll only do it for twenty minutes (or ten, or x amount of pushups, or whatever). Chances are in that time you'll start to like it and keep doing it. If not, then you've at least done the twenty minutes!

    *Make new friends on here and keep yourself accountable

    *Make little changes at a time that you can actually achieve so that you have achievable goals ahead of you and a sense of accomplishment when you do achieve them.

    *Instead of feeling demotivated because of slips, use the slips to learn about yourself -how can you do it differently next time, what triggered the problem, etc. Planning your "slips" will make you feel much more in control.

    Good luck!
  • lmaiviet
    lmaiviet Posts: 3
    Quitting is the easy part. Put down the cigarettes and put your gym gear on now and go for it. Another suggestion is to go to sleep in your gym gear and when the alarm wakes you up in the morning you're dressed and ready to go so you have no excuse.
  • HungryTuna
    HungryTuna Posts: 141
    I just went through a similar situation myself... I'd been doing well with Power 90 then moving onto P90X for several months now.
    The last two weeks I took off was a big mistake. It's been hard to get back in the swing of things, but I'm trying, even if it's a little bit at a time.

    Take it one day at a time and do your best on that given day. Relax and make your next meal the best meal of your day. Exercise can be done anywhere if you get up and move around a bit. Do some squats while waiting on dinner to cook, or bust out some push-ups on the counter in the ladies room.. I sneak in little exercises where I can thorughout the day so I can remind myself to stay active.
  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
    Falling off the wagon happens, Don't STAY under the wagon. Get up, dust yourself off and keep moving forward.
  • beth050680
    beth050680 Posts: 7
    here's what my dad has told me time and time again that has helped me before; one simple little phrase: JUST DO THE NEXT RIGHT THING! Forget starting over tomorrow, start over right now! Focus on your next bite of food. I mean literally - the next thing you pop in your mouth. Is it going to be a healthy bite of food? The next time you get a craving for a cig (I've quit too)......whatever you do, do not put one in your mouth! Chew on a piece of sugar free gum instead. whatever your next move is, just make sure that it's the right thing to do towards your goal. It will suck for a while, because it will have to be a conscious effort every stinkin' time. But trust me, it gets a LOT easier the more and more you do it! One liiiitle itty bitty baby step at a time. that's what forms habits :) good luck!!!
  • kleeann3
    kleeann3 Posts: 17
    forget about yesterday, in the morning you will think today is the day and just take one day at a time doing what YOU KNOW is right =)..i feel the same way as you and this is my first week doing this so just take one day at a time
  • rach_00
    rach_00 Posts: 72
    Get back into it :) You can do it!
  • sunshinesonata
    sunshinesonata Posts: 241 Member
    You are never more than 1 meal away from perfect nutrition. :tongue:

    LOVE THIS! I totally agree! Just brush yourself off, and get back on.

    The key is to not be too hard on yourself. =]
  • billmac
    billmac Posts: 51 Member
    Hi Carly

    The mind is sure a funny thing. I'm in a phase where the whole losing weight thing is currently easy. Yet on many occasions in the recent past I've tried and failed. FWIW I'll outline two things seem to be critical to me. For reasons related to my family I ended up at a psychologist. So he was helpful to us but in the end he said "I want to see you on your own" So i went back. He diagnosed me as severeley/ extremely depressed. The only positive thing I had going was that I had no intention of topping myself. I covered it with extremes of exercise and work. He finally persuaded me that i should take a very low dose anti-depressant just to give myself a break which then allowed us to work on the problems. I would never have thought I was depressed. I guess i'd been that way a long time and didn't know the difference. However a few sessions later the sun came out. I started to feel good; gave up the nightly wine; joined MFP (for the second time) and the weight more or less just falls away.

    The second thing a (sort of) counsellor told me years ago was to do a meditation type exercise and then visualise yourself as you want to be. He had some theory that willpower alone cannot work and cannot overcome the mind. So get your photo of how you are, then visualise the person you want to be. Discard the old image and continually bring up the image you want to be. Eventually you see yourself as the new person and that is who you become.

    One last thing re exercise. I only do what I enjoy. I don't push myself hard. If I want to stop after 1200M swim instead of 2.5K I do. If I feel like stopping after 100M and have a spell I do. I try to make my aim to enjoy every moment and to feel good. Not exhaust myself.
    So no need to go to the gym and work out insanely...just go...or maybe first...just go for an enjoyable walk...do something, anything! It really doesn't matter. Just take a small step forward no matter how small.
    I hope something here helps.
    As I said...all FWIW and hope you find
  • falloner
    falloner Posts: 11
    My 2c...

    Put the scale away for a month. Nothing in the past got me more depressed than when I couldn't see any change day in day out. I put mine away and bring it out every 3 or 4 days. I might not see a noticeable change day to day, but when I get on that scale and see it read .50 lbs less than it did the last time, I do a little dance and I'm more motivated than ever to keep things moving in that direction.
  • billmac
    billmac Posts: 51 Member
    Hi Carly...one more thing I did. In the B&F photos threads you can find great photos of what people here have achieved and it shows you what is possible. I got a good one of those and put it on my desktop and look at it every few days.
  • Karabobarra
    Karabobarra Posts: 782 Member
    What are you're choices?
    You can start over again or you can stay down.
    Where will you be in 6 months if you start over? Where will you be in 6 months if you stay down?

    Just pick one thing to quit at a time... although smoking is probably worse for your health in the long run, if your goal is to lose weight you probably should cut back the drinking first. Once you have that under control and are comfortable I would then try to tackle the smoking, but keep in mind you are also trying to manage your diet, and increase workouts. It's alot to expect out of yourself all at once, it sounds like you set yourself up to fail if you tried to do all these major changes at once. One thing at a time then move onto the next, and get some support! :-) There is tons of it on here!

    Good luck! (now suck it up and get moving!)
  • ldezara
    ldezara Posts: 4
    Quit beating yourself up over what happened today and remember that everyday is a new beginning. Instead of trying to do it all, set a small goal for yourself (drinking 8 glasses of water tomorrow, or getting more active by taking a nice walk) and achieve it. Small victories will lead to real progress. Don't overwhelm yourself by trying to do it all, just take one step at a time.
  • You are all amazing I never expected this sort of response. I think I'm going to do the photo of how I am now because I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror so might be good to force myself to see it in a photo. The dieting part is hard because of trauma as a kid I can't eat fruit or veg (sounds funny but a certain someone *cough* dad *cough* tried to force it down my throat literally) I can eat potato(worst thing for you), avocado and bananas but anything else has me vomitting. With my food the best I can do is cut out bread and rice but then it doesn't leave me many options. Thank you very much for all the advice I will take it all in my stride and get off my *kitten* and get back into it! And thank you for the friend requests too :smile:
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